History Page             

                                               610 649 NAIL ( 6245 )

   WARNING - THIS EVERYDAY BLOG USES STORIES AND LANGUAGE THAT WILL OFFEND SOME ONE..............SOMETIMES.

                                                THE EVERYDAY LIFE OF A CLUB OWNER , FATHER , & A GUY.

                                                        SCROLL DOWN TO MOST RECENT DATE

     I continued the philosophy work hard  , treat everyone with respect , and have fun !! Help promote the BANDS as much as possible and these are my basic ingredients to run a small dive bar that's been around a long time.

Work hard :

     Wheels ( my wife ) gets upset at me. She accuses me of one thing , " you only care about THE NAIL".  She is right.  If parties come around or social gatherings , I always say lets go and at the last second, I would  have to work on bands , websites , or ideas or head to the club. She would get upset and I would eventually go out , but I must drive her insane.  I have a sleep disorder. It's called sleep apnea. I sleep no more than 3 hours in a row. I use it to my advantage. When I get up in the middle of the night I would start working on NAIL promotions , websites , and business. I eat, sleep, and think THE NAIL. If I had to guess why I am so passionate about being a semi " successful " club.  It's probably because certain people were against us. They said it was a foolish idea and a saturated business. We would be throwing money away. I had to prove them wrong , not for their opinions , but for myself. One person does stick out .........Wheels and I were over a " friend's " house.  We'll call him " J ".   Having a couple of beers with some " friends ", we decided to tell everyone we bought The Nail.  J's brother-in-law, " T " , said " it is the worst business to get in and you will fail eventually" ( and this was a person that was successful and I respected back than). I will never ever ever forget that. Here we were ....proud owners of an established 60 year old nightclub that Wheels and I have been patronizing for 2 decades and now told we had absolutely no chance of making it.....not even a fake congratulations. He was the first of several to try to shoot our hopes down.  Every time someone projects negativity towards our bar..........I WORK EVEN HARDER THAN BEFORE................... RUDY of Notre Dame would shit his pants. We bought the club in January of 1997 and as of today , we have the longest tenure of ownership of any owner dating back to its opening day as " Humps Bar " in 1948. This is a huge monumental enormous gigantic accomplishment since all employees bailed on us when times got tough. My claim to Un-fame......" In our first 2 years of ownership , we lost enough money to buy a house in Havertown." I had 4 jobs and Wheels had 3 to keep The Nail afloat. Our so called friends/employees did not know this. Wheels and I struggled for over 2 years working 60-65 hour work weeks while they got paid and our bills piled up like a mountain........you try it and see how long you last. We did it because we believed in the bar , the music , and ourselves. Yes we lost friends but true friends and family stuck with us. Little did we know the previous owner Mitch had Daddy buy him the bar as a college gift.  So the books looked outstanding without a MORTGAGE. We found out his numbers were all lies at the settlement table.  My famous antennas told me many times something was wrong , but we ended up driving the hard road. The quick story of the last owner and how we purchased The Nail. Wheels and I are sitting next to him at the bar one night. I say , " Hey Mitch , if you ever want to sell The Nail , Wheels and I would be interested. " He replies , " No , no , no , no , no I would never sell it. " He gets up and walks towards the front door. About midway he stops and comes right back to us and says , " Are you serious ? , we can meet tomorrow at Villanova Diner if you want ? "  Holy shit did my antennas go up , but they were so clouded by my overwhelming feeling that I could own the infamous Nail one day.  Anyway , back to the main story of employees and bailing friends. One old school employee left us because he wanted to get " out of the  business ". The next week he got a job at a another bar as a bartender......not so old school there.  These were the high hurdles Wheels and I had to endure.....day in and day out........by ourselves.   It was time to rebuild.

Treating people with respect :

     Its simple, treat people with some dignity , make some humor about myself ( usually about my penis size or sex life) and remove all angry people.........everybody should be treated the same. Saying jokes about myself makes people feel a little better about themselves and they say " you know what , I am not the only one that has money , health , or relationship problems.

Removing angry people:

      Major priority here......nothing worse than sitting next to a drunken idiot proclaiming all life's answers while he works at Burger King deep frying onion rings. A Havertown policeman once quoted to me...." we never get any calls at The Rusty Nail ".  I wonder how many bars can say that ?  It seems every weekend there are fights or altercations at other clubs.  This is our home and that's how we treat people. OUR ONE RULE , " GET IN A FIGHT......DONE FOR LIFE. "

Bands:

      When we started, I asked what can we do for the bands " promotionally " wise ?   The same old answer ," we did it all and nothing will help".  At the time, we were in 11 newspapers and had one generic monthly calendar.  So , one weekend, Wheels and I went up to our mountain house ( that we built with our own hands ) with "phonebooks" from all over the counties. We made a list of all the newspapers and internet companies.  I continue to make the list grow.  Now, we are in 56 newspapers and affiliates.........radio promos..........our websites (www.thenail1.com., Facebook/rustynail together average over 1500 " hits " a day....that's  unbelievable for such a small nightclub).......monthly calendars on time.......new illuminated outdoor sign............35 internet companies ...........mailing list............our own radio show ,  and it goes on. We have quadrupled the band intake. We let bands network with each other by having up to 4 bands or more on the weekends. I remember a phone call I took in 1999.  The person said, " we played THE NAIL a couple a months ago, we brought alot of people, had fun , and would like another gig ".  I said to him, " you mean no one has called you since than ? "  Right there and than I took over the booking. I call all bands every Monday ( or Tuesday sometimes ) before and after they play here ( no other owner does this).   Treat bands with respect...they are the backbone of THE NAIL They are the ones working hard to bring people in, practicing, promoting ,and such....so, why the hell wouldn't I help them?  I refuse to be the owner that's all drunk behind the bar with a disgusted face saying " they did not bring a 100 people....... they're done".  I give out my home phone number (no other owner does this) to prevent frustrating phone tag and usually have 15-20 minute conversations with each individual band on the first phone call (no other owner does this) . I know if I was in a band, I would like a direct link to the owner and have a respectable conversation. I put myself in the shoes of the band and tell them how much we appreciate them.  We lend out our PA system to bands playing  "other " clubs for FREE ( what the hell other owner does this ? ). Several times with my van and easy pass (no other owner does this). We throw a huge "Wheelstock " party at our private vacation home that Wheels and I built ( 4 years to build ).........for 13 years it was completely free .... it was $20 for the last two years..... 330 people showed up last year ( damn hurricane ).....400 the year before ! Once again, a 4 day party and the NAIL supplies breakfast , lunch , dinner , beer , liquor , bands , and showers for everyone for 4 days ( show me one fucking owner that does this ??!!  Throws a party for 400 people for 4 days for fucking FREE ??!! ). We ended it in 2006 because of the incredible amount of time , effort , wear & tear on our home , & neighbors being super pissed at us. The main reason for stopping this party was 2 out of 3 people did not who Wheels or myself were. We walk around to 40-50 campsites and say thank you and people would say , " who the hell are you ? " Yep the WHEELSTOCK party got so big people attending were now friends of friends of friends of friends and had no clue this was a RUST Y NAIL party and US thanking people for their support over the years.

     Our website is updated & blogged every day under the " HISTORY " link , not one day ever missed....this includes weekends, holidays , and vacations. I talk about my life as if it were a soap opera (no other owner does this)........and in this business it usually is......mostly for entertainment though (doing this since day one of the takeover ) ( no other club owner does this ).   I could go on and on and on.......no one comes close. I do all this because we do not have the luxury of the " walk in " crowd.  We need the bands to work a little harder for us .....that's why I work 10 times harder than any other club owner.

     We have our own radio show since 2005.  All bands get plugs on our LIVE radio show. All bands do live interviews to promote ALL their shows and express their music and songs. What the hell other owners help promote other clubs ?  Everyone helps a little......we help more. 

     We hope you join our little family.........simply known as THE NAIL

                    " LIVE AT THE NAIL "  RADIO SHOW   !!!

  We welcome these Radio Stations that promote our show

WWW.CYBERSTORMRADIO.COM    WWW.SRrocks.COM

              1370 WPAZ POTTSTOWN   WWW.RADIOFREEWORLDWIDE.COM

   HOLA 1600 am        WXVU 89.1 fm        KUR    88.3 fm

  WEXP 530 am         WWUV   90.7 fm     WVUM 90.1 fm       KUR    1670  am

  WWXU  91.1 fm      WWCY 89.5 fm       WIN 88.9 fm ( WIN 89 )

  WWEC  88.1 fm        WWNW  88.9 fm    WVUD  91.3 fm     Berks Cable ( Ch 24 )

  WPKN  89.5 fm        WPKM  88.7 fm      WDWN 89.1 fm      Hometown Utilicom ( Ch 41 )

  WPTC   88.1 fm        WCUC   91.7 fm      WSRN  91.5 fm      

  WDCV  88.3 fm        WXLV    90.3 fm     WRRG  88.9 fm      930 AM (The Cockroach)

  WRHS   89.7 fm        WVUD   91.3 fm     WIXQ 91.7 FM       WIXQ.COM             

BLACK CIRCUS RADIO ( DEAD CELL RECORDS )

 SHORTCAST.COM      WSJR  ( INTERNET )    WYBF  89.1 FM

  http://www.advancedrf.net

  WWW.THENAIL1.COM ( click on " radio show " on the left index on our home page. LISTEN AT ANYTIME )

 

                        WEBCASTED BY REAL AUDIO    

  ** Do you have a contact with a college, internet or commercial radio station ?  Any help to air our FREE show would be greatly appreciated.  We are here to help the local bands of our communities.  Our format is simple. We interview bands. The bands express their opinions and songs through their music.......with alittle fun too. **  This would increase our relationship with your band and The Nail nightclub.**

             PERFORMED LIVE EVERY SUNDAY NIGHT AT 6 PM

                                     ** ALL BANDS GET PROMOTED **

                  ALL BANDS GET LIVE INTERVIEWS , CD EXPOSURE , ETC..  **

                                              NO OTHER CLUB DOES THIS !! 

   We made our point ............work hard , respect , and promote.  All businesses.....whether in a band or selling corn on the cob ........ should have this mentality and attitude.

                                              ***  BOOKING CONTACT AT  mailto:thenail1@comcast.net   ***

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------       

    SUNDAY     6 - 17 - 18 ( FATHER'S DAY )

  MY GIFT TO MYSELF FOR FATHER'S DAY WAS TO DO NOTHING. I KINDA DID THAT.

  I WANTED JUST TO RELAX AND BINGE WATCH " THE WALKING DEAD ". AGAIN ..........I KINDA DID THAT.

  START MORNING DOING MY NORMAL STUFF. I DECIDED TO SIT IN FRONT OF THE TV AND PUT A RABBIT HUTCH TOGETHER. 3 HOURS LATER I HAD IT DONE. THE HUTCH IS ACTUALLY PRETTY COOL AND WELL THOUGHT OUT TO ACCESS AND PROTECT THE RABBIT. THE DIRECTIONS..........WELL , THAT'S ANOTHER STORY. MY YOUNGEST AND ELDEST HELPED ME 2 HOURS AFTER I STARTED IT. THE BEST ADJECTIVE BY MY YOUNGEST WAS , " THESE DIRECTIONS ARE VAGUE. " I REPLY , " THAT IS THE BEST ADJECTIVE TO DESCRIBE THEM. "

  GET MY ELDEST OFF TO HER NEW APARTMENT. THE KID ROLLS OUT AND NOW IT IS ME , MY YOUNGEST , AND THE PUP. THE KID STUDIES WHILE ME AND THE PUP WATCH THE PHILLIES.  PHILS TAKE 2 OF 3 FROM THE 1ST PLACE BREWERS. THEY WON 10 - 9 AND ALMOST BLEW A 5 RUN 9TH INNING LEAD.

  MY KID HAS BEEN STUDYING FOR FINALS THE LAST 2 DAYS. I WANTED TO GET HER OUT OF HER ROOM FOR A CHANGE OF PACE. SHE ALWAYS FIGHTS ME A LITTLE BIT IN THE BEGINNING BUT ALWAYS HAS A GOOD TIME WHEN WE ARE DONE......ALWAYS.

  WE TAKE A NICE BACK ROAD MOTORCYCLE RIDE TO THE NAIL. SHE EVEN SAID , " THAT WAS A LONG RIDE . " WE HANG OUT FOR ABOUT 15 MINUTES AND ROLL OUT.

  NEXT STOP ........." WAWA ". I BUY THE KID DINNER FOR HELPING ME. WE SEE A NAIL REGULAR WHO WORKS THERE AND TALK TO HER FOR 10 MINUTES.

  NEXT STOP " RITA'S WATER ICE ".  WE GET SOME ICE CREAM AND SIT ON A WALL. I AM VERY SURPRISED THERE ARE NO BENCHES OR TRASHCANS AROUND. I ENJOY JUST CHILLING WITH THE KID.

  AN OLD REGULAR NAMED " MATTY B. " COMES OUT OF A RESTAURANT NEXT TO RITA'S CALLED " PIZZARELLA ". HE RECOGNIZES ME AND SAYS HELLO. HE INSTANTLY GOES INTO SALES MODE. HE WORKS AT THIS PIZZA PLACE AND TRIES TO SELL IT TO ME.  WE WALK IN TO GET MENU'S AND USE THEIR TRASH CAN FROM OUR ICE CREAM. HE PUSHES THEIR FOOD " USED CAR SALEMAN " STYLE AND SAYS IT IS REALLY REALLY GOOD. HE GIVE US 2 MENUS AND I THROW THEM OUT WHEN I GET HOME.  WHY DID I THROW THEM OUT ? HERE'S THE STORY :

 1ST - WE TRIED THIS PIZZA PLACE 6 MONTHS AGO AND IT WAS NOT GOOD.

 2ND - THE MAIN REASON I DISCARDED THE " USED CAR SALESMAN " APPROACH TO CONVINCE US WAS.......WELL , MATTY B USED TO BE A USED CAR SALESMAN.  YEARS AGO WE HAD A NEIGHBOR WHO LIVED BEHIND A HEDGE FROM OUR HOUSE. SHE HAD A DAUGHTER OUR KID'S AGE AND THEY PLAYED TOGETHER EVERY SO OFTEN. THE SINGLE MOM HAD NO MONEY AND NEEDED A CAR. I SUGGESTED USING MATTY B AND HIS PARTNER. SO , THESE GUYS GOT A CAR FOR OUR FRIEND. FROM THE START ALL KINDS OF MECHANICAL PROBLEMS. IT GOT TO THE POINT WHERE THE CAR NEVER GOT OUT OF THE MECHANIC SHOP. THEY SAID THEY GIVE HER THE MONEY BACK FROM THE PURCHASE.  SHE WAITED ONE YEAR AND USED ME AS THE GO BETWEEN. THE GUY WENT OFF THE GRID SO I GAVE OUR FRIEND FROM BEHIND THE HEDGE $1500 AND SAID , " I FOUND THE SALES GUY MATTY B. AND HE GAVE ME YOUR MONEY BACK. I HANDED HER THE MONEY AND SHE WAS SO HAPPY. I NEVER TOLD HER IT WAS ME GIVING THE MONEY OUT OF MY POCKET AND THE USED CAR SALESMAN NEVER CONTACTED ME AGAIN......UNTIL TODAY.

  WHEN LEAVING RITA'S WATER ICE I TOLD THE ABOVE STORY TO MY KID.

  BACK HOME I OFFER TO TAKE THE KID TO DINNER AT " BIGA'S ". SHE DECLINES BECAUSE SHE HAS ENOUGH FOOD. I KINDA WANTED TO TAKE THE KID OUT TO DINNER AND JUST CHILL FOR FATHER'S DAY AND SHOW HER THIS NEW RESTAURANT.  WE ENDED UP HANGING OUT AND WATCHING ABOUT 30 MINUTES OF THE LATEST SPONGE BOB MOVIE.

  I SETTLE IN AND WATCH 3 EPISODES OF " W. D. ".......... ALL OF THEM WERE VERY GOOD.

  WE MOVE THE RABBIT INTO HER NEW HUTCH. WE PUT HAY AND CARROTS IN THERE ALONG WITH NEW WATER FOR THE BOTTLE.  WE HAD THE RABBIT IN OUR GARDEN ALL DAY WHICH IS A HUGE CHANGE FROM THE BEDROOM'S LITTLE ENCLOSURE.

  OFF TO BED AROUND 1AM AND I SLEPT GOOD UNTIL 6AM. I HAD A COOL DREAM THAT I TOTALLY FORGOT.

   MONDAY        6 - 18 - 18

  EVERYWHERE I WATCH TV OR INTERNET THERE ARE ADS FOR FAT BURNING SUPPLEMENTS OR LOW CALORIE DIETS OR SMOOTHIES OR EATING HEALTHY........KINDA GETTING SICK OF IT.

  MY ANTENNAS WERE RIGHT AGAIN. PHILLIES ARE WINNING 4 - 2 AND HERE COMES THE 9TH INNING.  I SAID TO MYSELF , " THEY ARE GOING TO BLOW THIS LEAD ".  WELP , OUR PITCHER STRIKES OUT THE SIDES AND USUALLY 3 STRIKE OUTS IS A GOOD THING.....EXCEPT WHEN THE CATCHER MISSES THE 3RD STRIKE AND THE ST. LOUIS CARDINAL RUNNER SCORES FROM 3RD BASE. CARDINALS TIE THE GAME AND THAN IN THE 10TH INNING THEY HIT A HOME RUN TO GO UP 1 RUN. OUR PITCHER THREW THE SAME EXACT PITCH IN THE SAME EXACT LOCATION TWICE IN A ROW. AGAIN , MY ANTENNAS WERE SPOT ON.

  BUT.........THE PHILLIES DO SOMETHING US PHILLY FANS ARE NOT USED TO.  MOST RALLIES END UP IN FAILURE. I CALL IT " SUCKING US IN ".  THIS GOES FOR ANY  PHILLY TEAM. THEY MAKE A MOVE TO WIN A GAME AND FALL SHORT. WELL TONIGHT , A " CARDINAL " SIN WAS MADE. CARDINAL LEFT FIELDER DIVES FOR A BALL WITH PHILLY RUNNERS ON 1ST & 2ND. THIS IS A NO-NO WHEN UP ONE RUN. HE DIVES AND THE BALL RICOCHETS OFF HIS FACE AND BOUNCES TO THE BACK WALL. BOTH RUNNERS SCORE EASILY AND THE PHILLIES WIN IN 10 INNINGS. WATCHING THE POST GAME WAS PRETTY FUNNY.

  CUT THE LAWNS IN THE HEAT. I THINK I KNOW WHY ONE LAWN MOWER WOULD NOT START. GOOD OLE BLACK ELECTRICAL TAPE SEEMED TO WORK.

  PICK UP YOUNGEST AT SCHOOL ON MY MOTORCYCLE AT 9:30AM. MAN THERE WERE A TON OF PARENTS THERE. ONE MORE DAY OF SCHOOL AND MY KID IS DONE. I'M HAPPY FOR HER. WE TAKE A NICE SCENIC RIDE HOME.

  BACK HOME I MAKE BREAKFAST AND WE CHILL.

  OFF TO THE NAIL TO PREP AND DO MY NORMAL THINGS. I CONSOLIDATED 8 PUNCH LISTS INTO ONE.  I ALSO CHANGE THE MARQUEE TWICE , TAKE PICTURES , AND POST BAND FACEBOOK ADS FOR THE COMING WEEK. ( I DO THIS EVERY WEEK )

  I HEAR THUNDER AND IT MAKES ME NERVOUS SINCE I HAVE MY MOTORCYCLE HERE. I ROLL OUT AND NO RAIN COMES.

  TALK TO MY ELDEST AND YOUNGEST JUST TO CHECK IN ON THEM.

  CHILL AND WATCH 2 EPISODES OF " THE WALKING DEAD ". THE MOVE INTO SEASON 7 IS VERY VERY GOOD BUT SO DAMN DEPRESSING. THE " GOOD " GUYS GET THERE ASSES KICKED FRIGGIN' BIG TIME.

  OFF TO BED AND THE PUP IS ON MY BLANKET. THIS TIME I MOVE THE DOG AND WE WATCH HOGAN'S HEROES TOGETHER. I SLEPT PRETTY GOOD.

   TUESDAY       6 - 19 - 18

  SOME MOVEMENT ON THE WEEDING COMPANY BUT NOT MUCH. AN ACTUAL REAL  EMAIL WAS RETURNED SAYING " THEY WILL HAVE AN UPDATE ON THEIR SCHEDULE BY THURSDAY.  THIS IS THE 3RD TIME I HAVE READ THIS IN 7 WEEKS SO MY HOPES ARE NOT THAT HIGH.

  SPEND SEVERAL HOURS WITH A HEDGE CLIPPER , A TREE BRANCH SNIPPER , AND A LADDER. LET ME TELL YOU.......ITS NOT FUN.  OUR BUSHES AND TREES ARE WAY TOO HIGH.  TODAY I TRIMMED THE BEJESUS OUT OF THEM.  PILES OF BRANCHES ALL OVER THE PROPERTY.

  HEAD TO THE NAIL 3 TIMES.  I UNLOADED TRASH FROM A SIDE JOB , TOOK A BEER DELIVERY , TOOK A 2ND BEER DELIVERY BECAUSE THE 1ST HAD THE WRONG PRODUCT , AND MET WITH OUR SODA TECH.

  I HAD A NEW BARTENDER RE-OPEN FOR THE NIGHT. SHE TOLD ME SHE LOVED WORKING POOL LEAGUE NIGHT. I THOUGHT IT WAS NICE MY ELDEST AND HER FRIEND VISITED THE BARTENDER ON HER 1ST SOLO SHIFT.

  BACK HOME I TRY TO NAP BUT GET WOKEN UP.  WHY ?.......WHEELS MISSED A TURN COMING HOME FROM NEW JERSEY. I MAY HAVE MADE A JOKE OR TWO SINCE SHE HAS DONE THIS DRIVE OVER 1,000 TIMES. 

  YOUNGEST FINISHES SCHOOL. IT'S OFFICIAL.........ALL SNOW DAYS ARE MADE UP AND EXAMS ARE DONE.

  SETTLE IN FOR THE NIGHT. THIS NO BRANDY / NO BEER THING REALLY BLOWS.  I WATCH A COUPLE OF EPISODES OF " THE RANCH " WHICH IS GOOD. TOTALLY BUMMING DANNY MASTERSON , A MAIN CHARACTER & CO-PRODUCER WITH ASHTON KUTCHER , HAS BEEN LET GO AT THE END OF THIS SEASON. WHY ? BECAUSE OF HIS PENIS. HE HAS VEHEMENTLY DENIED ALL ACCUSATIONS FROM 4 WOMEN.

  WHEELS ARRIVES HOME AND IMMEDIATELY HEADS OUT TO DINNER WITH FRIENDS.  I HAD GLUTEN FREE , LOW SALT CHIPS WITH HUMMUS.......BLOW.

  DO IT NOW OR WAIT A WEEK.  USING 10 TRASHCANS WHEELS , OUR YOUNGEST , AND THE PUP ALL HELP ME LOAD THEM WITH THE BRANCHES I CUT THIS MORNING.  THE TRASH FOR WEEDS IS COLLECTED EVERY WEDNESDAY. IF WE DID NOT DO IT TONIGHT WE WOULD HAVE TO WAIT UNTIL NEXT WEEK. WE TIMED IT PERFECT AROUND 8PM. THE SUN WAS DOWN , I PUT ON SOME OLDIES MUSIC , AND THE PUP WAS GIVEN CUT BRANCHES TO PLAY WITH.  WITH THE LAWN CUT AND THE BUSHES TRIMMED BACK OUR YARD LOOKS 50% BETTER. NOW......WAITING FOR THE WEED COMPANY JUST ABSOLUTELY BLOWS. THE ONE YEAR I DECIDE NOT TO WEED MYSELF AND I GET A COMPANY THAT HAS A BACKED UP SCHEDULE WORSE THAN ANYTHING I HAVE EVER SEEN.

  AFTER LOADING 10 TRASHCANS OF BRANCHES AND BUSH TRIMMINGS I HEAD INSIDE FOR A NICE COLD VODKA / GREEN TEA WITH LOW SUGAR , SALT , AND TASTE. WHEELS AND I WATCH AN EPISODE OF " BROCKMIRE ". IT WAS GOOD.

   WEDNESDAY         6 - 20 - 18

  I WAS TOLD , " MAN , YOU GOT TO STOP MAKING A HABIT OF THIS. " I ALMOST CHOKED ON MY RICE CAKE WITH LAUGHTER. ACTUALLY CHOKING ON RICE CAKES HAPPENS ALL THE TIME.

  THE STORY : I RAN OUT OF GAS ON MY MOTORCYCLE TODAY. YEP , MY RESERVE FUEL GAUGE WAS POINTED IN THE WRONG DIRECTION. THIS MEANS I RAN ALL GASOLINE DOWN TO EMPTY. IF THE RESERVE IS NOT ENGAGED THAN YOU HAVE ABOUT 1/2 GALLON LEFT.....WHICH GETS YOU HOME.  RIDING HOME FROM THE NAIL I MAKE IT ALMOST TO THE TOP OF CONESTOGA ROAD WHICH IS A STEEP HILL. THE BIKE CONKS OUT AND I NOTICE THE RESERVE IS ON. I MAY HAVE USED SEVERAL COLORFUL WORDS.

 --- I ATTEMPT TO START THE BIKE FOR ONE LAST PUSH AND TO MY SURPRISE IT STARTS AND I GUN IT IN 1ST GEAR. IT GETS ME UP THE HILL AND THROUGH THE TRAFFIC LIGHT BEFORE CONKING OUT AGAIN. I GLIDE MY BIKE TO OUR STREET AND TO THE BOTTOM OF MY DRIVEWAY. I THINK , " I WONDER HOW BAD IT IS GOING TO PUSH THIS BIKE UP OUR DRIVEWAY ? ". IT IS A STEEP INCLINE AND I THINK OF TEXTING MY YOUNGEST WHO IS IN THE HOUSE BUT I DECIDE TO GIVE IT A SHOT. IT IS NOW ME.....260 POUNDS VERSE A 641 POUND HONDA VTX 1300.  THE BIKE HAS THE ADVANTAGE OF THE INCLINING HILL.  SO IT'S ON.....FAT VS MACHINE.

 --- MY FIRST 3 STEPS PUSHING THE HEAVY BIKE UP THE DRIVEWAY AND I STOP. I SAID TO MYSELF , " THERE IS NO WAY I CAN DO THIS WITHOUT HAVING A HEART ATTACK. " I GIVE IT ANOTHER SHOT WITH THE MOTTO " JUST KEEP SWIMMING OR THIS LITTLE TRAIN CAN. "  STEP BY STEP , I REACH THE TOP AND INTO THE GARAGE. I WAS BREATHING SO DAMN HEAVY YOU THINK I RAN A MARATHON WITH A 100 POUND BACK BACK AROUND MY ASS. I MEAN I WAS PANTING LIKE OUR DOG ON A SUMMER DAY. I GO INSIDE AND TRY TO EXPLAIN TO MY YOUNGEST BUT NEEDED A MOMENT TO GET MY WIND. GOOD GOD I AM FAT.

  SO , THE POINT OF THIS STORY: 

  -- I TELL THIS EVENT TO A REGULAR AT THE NAIL. COINCIDENTALLY , HE SAW ME RUN OUT OF GAS WITH ANOTHER MOTORCYCLE 3 YEARS AGO. HE SAYS TO ME AFTER I TELL THE STORY , " MAN , YOU GOTTA STOP MAKING A HABIT OF RUNNING OUT OF GAS. "  I JUST GIGGLED AND CHOKED ON A CINNAMON RICE CAKE AND SAID , " HABIT ? I'VE BEEN RIDING SINCE I WAS 15 YEARS OLD AND THIS IS THE 2ND TIME IN 40 YEARS. THAT IS A HABIT ? "

  OK , LET'S START MY DAY.  I AM ELATED THE 10 TRASHCANS OF TREE LIMBS AND BUSH CUTTINGS ARE TAKEN. I WALK THE TRASHCANS BACK TO WHERE THEY BELONG. WALKING UP AND DOWN THE DRIVEWAY 3 TIMES MAKES ME PANT LIKE AN IDIOT.

  SINCE I AM OUTSIDE I MOVE THE RABBIT FROM ITS NEW HUTCH TO IT'S LARGE GARDEN ENCLOSURE. I HAVE THE PUP OUTSIDE WITH ME SO I DO ONE PROJECT......MOUNT A NEW OUTDOOR LANTERN. OF COURSE , IT  DOES NOT FIT SO I HAVE TO MACGYVER IT. JESUS......CAN'T CATCH A BREAK. IT CAME OUT NICE.

   NEXT I SECURE A BATHROOM TOE KICK THAT HAS BEEN FALLING DOWN FOR ABOUT 14 YEARS. THE SCALE IS ON THE GROUND WHERE I AM WORKING SO I WEIGH MYSELF. I AM 1 FULL SPIN AND A QUARTER.

   I GET SOME COMPUTER STUFF DONE AND DECIDE TO LAY ON THE COUCH AND WATCH AN EPISODE OF " THE RANCH". THE EPISODES ARE 22 MINUTES. I FALL ASLEEP FOR 30 MINUTES AND HAVE TO REPLAY IT. THE EPISODE WAS EXCELLENT......MADE ME CRY.

  TRY TO TAKE IT EASY MOST OF THE LATE AFTERNOON SINCE I HAVE TO BARTEND TONIGHT. I WATCH THE PHILLIES WIN A GOOD GAME OVER A TOUGH CARDINAL TEAM. THEY HAVE WON 3 SERIES IN A ROW NOW.

  RIDE MY MOTORCYCLE TO THE GAS STATION TO FILL IT UP. I WAS HAPPY I MADE IT WITH NO PROBLEMS.

  WHEELS VISITS AN UNCLE AND COUSIN. I HEAD TO THE NAIL.

  DRIVE MY VAN TO THE NAIL AND DUMP SOME MORE TRASH IN OUR DUMPSTER. MAN , IS IT GOOD HAVING THIS THING.

  I DO MY NORMAL STUFF FROM STOCKING TO FIXING TO WONDERING HOW I GOT SO FAT. BY 9:30PM I AM TIRED AGAIN.

  AFTER 10PM I START DOING MY CLOSING PROCEDURES. I GIVE A PATRON A RIDE HOME AND CHILL WITH WHEELS AT OUR HOUSE. SHE IS WATCHING A SHOW CALLED " GRACIE AND FRANKIE ". LILLY TOMLIN AND JANE FONDA STAR IN IT. BOTH ARE 80 YEARS OLD AND IT IS ACTUALLY AN OKAY CHICK SHOW. IT IS ABOUT TWO RIVAL WOMEN WHO HAVE THE WORLDS TURNED UPSIDE DOWN WHEN EACH OF THEIR HUSBANDS LEAVE THEM.............FOR EACH OTHER'S HUSBANDS. YEP , THE 2 HUSBANDS FALL IN LOVE WITH EACH OTHER AND WANT TO MARRY. MARTIN SHEEN PLAYS ONE OF THE GAY HUSBANDS..........WHICH HE DID ON " TWO AND A HALF MEN ".

  I CHILL WITH MY YOUNGEST BY SNUGGLING WITH HER. I HAVE DONE THIS 4 TIMES TODAY WHICH IS STILL NOT ENOUGH.

  OFF TO BED BY 11PM. I SLEEP PRETTY GOOD.

  I TAKE MY NEPHEW TO A KID'S FOOTBALL TRYOUTS COMPETITION. THERE ARE HUNDREDS OF KIDS ALONG WITH TABLES OF FOOD , SNACKS , AND WATER. WE ARE CATTLE SHOOTED THROUGH THE LINES AND END UP BY THE COACHES AND TRAINERS. ONE COACH SAYS ," WHAT POSITION WOULD YOUR KID LIKE TO PLAY ? " MY NEPHEW CONFIDENTLY SAYS , " QUARTERBACK ".  THE COACH KINDA SMIRKS AND I KNOW WHAT HE IS THINKING......" YEAH , EVERY KID HERE WANTS TO BE THE QUARTERBACK. "  ANOTHER COACH GIVES MY NEPHEW A RED JERSEY FOR OFFENSE. BLUE JERSEYS ARE FOR DEFENSE. THEY ARE THE SHIRTS THAT HAVE HOLES IN IT AND LOOK LIKE FISH NETS. THE KID SUITS UP AND WAITS FOR THE NEXT SERIES OF PLAYS TO END. EACH KID WANTING TO PLAY QUARTERBACK RUNS THE TEAM FOR ONE SERIES. IF IT IS 3 DOWNS AND OUT AND THAN ON TO THE NEXT KID. THE LINE MOVES FAST BECAUSE NOT ONE KID TRYING TO BE A QUARTERBACK EVEN MAKES A FIRST DOWN. SO ......3 AND OUTS EVERY TIME.

  CONTINUED - I MOVE TO THE TABLES OF FOOD SINCE I AM THE MOST COMFORTABLE THERE. I TEXT MY BROTHER WE ARE HERE AND HIS SON IS ABOUT TO START THE TRY OUT. MY NEPHEW GETS IN AND ON THE FIRST PLAY HE SCRAMBLES TO HIS RIGHT AND FIRES A 20 YARD FROZEN ROPE TO A RECEIVER. THE RECEIVER CATCHES THE BALL AND RUNS FOR ANOTHER 10 YARDS. IT WAS THE ONLY FIRST DOWN THE COACHES HAVE SEEN ALL DAY. THE NEXT PLAY MY NEPHEW SCRAMBLES TO HIS LEFT AND RUNS FOR 36 YARDS.  THE KID MOVES LIKE MIKE VICK.  2 PLAYS FOR 66 YARDS.  FROM THE OPPONENTS 24 YARD LINE MY NEPHEW DROPS STRAIGHT BACK , VIEWS THE FIELD , STEPS OFF A RUSH , AND FLOATS A PERFECT PASS TO THE CORNER WHERE A TIGHT-END CATCHES IT FOR A TOUCHDOWN. THE COACHES AND PARENTS ARE FREAKING OUT AND CHEERING. I TEXT MY BROTHER , " DUDE , YOUR KID IS F'N AWESOME AT QUARTERBACK !! ".................dream ends.

   THURSDAY    6 - 21 - 18

  DO NOTHING...........OR DO SOMETHING.

  SIXERS DRAFT VILLANOVA PLAYER  BRIDGES  !!! WOO HOO !!!

   20 MINUTES LATER........SIXERS TRADE VILLANOVA PLAYER BRIDGES TO PHOENIX.

  LITTLE BIT OF A SLAP IN THE FACE WITH THE SIXERS HERE. VILLANOVA COACH AND MOM ( WHO WORKS FOR THE 76ERS ) SITTING AT THE SIXERS TABLE. THEY GET SUPER EXCITED WHEN BRIDGES IS DRAFTED. CAN ONLY IMAGINE HOW THEY FELT 1/2 AN HOUR LATER.

  START MY DAY IN A GREAT MOOD. THIS QUICKLY DROPPED SO MUCH I HAD A BEER AND BRANDY FOR THE FIRST TIME IN OVER A MONTH.  YEP , IT JUST PISS ME OFF.

  YOUNGEST AND I CLEAN THE RABBIT HUTCH AND PLACE THE RABBIT IN THE GARDEN ENCLOSURE.

  WEEDING COMPANY FOR THE 3RD TIME SAID A SCHEDULE WILL BE MADE BY THURSDAY. FOR THE 3RD TIME THEY LIED.

  OFF TO THE LIQUOR STORE TO PICK UP A SMALL ORDER WITH MY KID.

  TAKE A WONDERFUL RIDE TO " SONNY'S ITALIAN DELI " IN LIMERICK. MY YOUNGEST TRAVELED WITH ME AND SAID , " IT WAS THE BEST CHICKEN CUTLET SANDWICH I EVER HAD. "  WE ORDERED 1 HOAGIE , 2 ITALIAN CHICKEN CUTLET SANDWICHES  , 1 CUPCAKE , 1 SMALL PASTA SALAD , AND 1 WATER. THE COST........FREE. OKAY , THESE WERE FRIENDS OF OURS THAT I MET. THEY ARE DOING WHEELS AND I A FAVOR SO I DROVE OUT THERE. I ACTUALLY ALWAYS WANTED TO GO TO THEIR DELI. I HAVE HAD THEIR FOOD BEFORE WHICH IS ALWAYS VERY GOOD BUT NEVER BEEN TO THE BUSINESS. I LEFT A $36 TIP IN THE JAR.

  BACK HOME WE SETTLE IN. THE KIDS , WHEELS , AND MYSELF ALL PLAY AND PET THE PUPPY. MAN THAT DOG WAS HAPPY.

  MOTORCYCLE RIDE TO THE NAIL. THIS IS WHERE IT GOES DOWN HILL AND I CAN'T REMEMBER DOING THIS EVER.

  ONE BAND IS SUPER EARLY WHICH I HATE.  I BEGIN MY INSTRUCTIONS OF HOW TO LOAD IN. THE NORMAL STRICT PROCEDURES. THE BAND WANTS TO WAIT FOR THE 2ND BAND SO WE ALL WAIT. IT IS A GOOD SIZE GROUP WHEN THE 2ND BAND ARRIVES. PROBABLY CLOSE TO 16 PEOPLE. ALREADY , AT 7PM , IT IS THE BEST THURSDAY NIGHT IN MONTHS. THIS WOULD CHANGE.

  MY ELDEST ARRIVES AND TELLS ME SOMETHING I DO NOT WANT TO HEAR. SHE SAYS IT IN FRONT OF A PATRON AND EVEN THE PATRON SAYS SOMETHING TO MY KID.....AND HE WAS RIGHT. I WILL NOT GET INVOLVED BUT IT WAS A VERY PETTY THING TO SAY ABOUT A FRIEND. IT PUT ME IN A BAD MOOD.

  THE FIRST BAND IS DONE LOADING IN ON THE STAGE. THEY ORDER DRINKS AND FOOD USING CREDIT CARDS. I AM THE DOORMAN FOR THE NIGHT AND GO OUTSIDE TO SEE WHAT THE OTHER BAND IS DOING. I LOOK DOWN THE SIDEWALK AND ONE BAND MEMBER IS PISSING ON THE SIDEWALK. I FUCKING FREAK OUT. A BAND MEMBER ROLLING A LARGE SPEAKER CABINET IN STOPS. I SAY TO HIM , " HOLD OFF IN BRINGING THAT IN. I AM PRETTY SURE TONIGHT'S SHOW IS CANCELLED. "  I COULD NOT JUST DO NOTHING. TO ME , THIS WAS A SLAP IN THE FACE. I FUCKING HATE PEOPLE WHO LITTER AND THIS IS 10X WORSE.

  OH , 2 REGULARS WHO I CAUGHT ON SURVEILLANCE LITTERING CIGARETTE BUTTS FOR A 3RD TIME CALLED THE NAIL. I TOLD HIM IF I SEE HIM LITTER CIGARETTE BUTTS OUTSIDE ONE MORE TIME THEY ARE FLAGGED FROM HERE. THEY NEVER SHOWED UP AND I DIDN'T FUCKING CARE.

  I CONFIRM THE GUY'S ACTIONS AND CANCEL THE SHOW. I FEEL BAD FOR THE 1ST BAND WHO DID ABSOLUTELY NOTHING WRONG AND APOLOGIZED 10 TIMES TO ME. THE 2ND BAND NEVER CAME BACK IN.  I GAVE EVERYONE'S CREDIT CARDS BACK AND SAID , " YOUR DRINKS AND FOOD ARE ON ME. " I HAD ALL OF THEM LOAD UP AND LEAVE. I WAS SO PISSED SOMEONE WOULD DO THIS WHEN A BATHROOM IS FUCKING 50 FEET AWAY.

  I FELT BAD FOR THE BARTENDER BECAUSE NOW THE NIGHT WOULD BE WORSE WHEN 16 PEOPLE LEAVE. REGULARS AND POOL PLAYERS CAME IN LATER WHICH WAS NICE.

  I RIDE HOME AND HAVE 2 BEERS AND ONE BRANDY. I WATCH AN EPISODE OF " THE WALKING DEAD " AND TO MY LITTLE TINY CREDIT ONLY HAD ONE BRANDY.

  OFF TO BED AND FOUGHT A SECONDARY CPAP MACHINE ALL NIGHT. I SLEPT A TOTAL OF 45 MINUTES FROM 11PM TO 6AM......THIS CERTAINLY DOES NOT HELP MY SOMBER MOOD.

    FRIDAY     6 - 22 - 18

  WELP , THROW MY WHOLE GOOD EATING / NON BRANDY - BEER DRINKING OUT THE WINDOW.........DAMN IT.

  LITTLE LUCK TODAY AND MAN AM I NOT USED TO IT.  I TAKE A NICE MOTORCYCLE RIDE TO THE NAIL THIS MORNING. I GET THE NORMAL THINGS DONE AND HEAD BACK HOME.

  WHEN I'M QUIET , CONVERSATION JUST BLOWS.  I WAS STILL MELANCHOLY ABOUT THE LAST 24 HOURS SO I WAS VERY QUIET. ALL OF US TOOK A RIDE AND WHEELS AND I TOOK A LITTLE FURTHER RIDE.  WE ARRIVE AND THE LINES ARE AT LEAST 1 TO 1 1/2 HOURS LONG......PROBABLY MORE.  WHEELS TELLS ME WE CAN BYPASS THE LINES AND GO THROUGH THE " QUICK CHECK-IN ".  IN SECONDS WE WERE THROUGH AND I WAS ASTONISHED. WE WERE 3RD IN LINE IN SECONDS AND IN LESS THAN 1 MINUTE WE WERE ON OUR WAY. THE LINE WITH 300 PEOPLE WAS NOT MOVING AT ALL. MAN , THIS WOULD OF SO MADE MY MOOD WORSE.

  WHEELS GRABS A PRETZEL AND WATER. I HAD A SMOOTHIE SO I WAS GOOD. A 1 HOUR AND 7 MINUTE TRIP AND A FRIEND MEETS US. THIS IS WHERE MY DIET PLAN GETS SHOT UP BIG TIME.

  WE MEET 2 OTHER FRIENDS AT A WONDERFUL HOUSE. THERE ARE NOW 6 OF US. SNACKS AND BOOZE BEGIN TO FLOW. WE TALK , CHILL , LISTEN TO MUSIC , AND WATCH THE PHILLIES SMOKE THE NATIONALS.

  A FRIEND BRINGS HIS WONDERFUL ITALIAN HOAGIES AND A TON OF SNACKS FROM HIS DELI IN LIMERICK CALLED SONNY'S ITALIAN DELI. LET THE BOOZING BEGIN.  I MAY OF PARTAKED IN MILLER LITE , COORS LIGHT , JIM BEAM , HIREM WALKER BLACKBERRY BRANDY ( HAVE NOT TRIED THIS IN YEARS ) , JACQUIN'S APRICOT BRANDY , JIM BEAM , GIN & TONIC , AND ONE HIT OF POT. YEP.............I WAS HAMMERED.

  BY 11:30PM I DID NOT KNOW MY NAME WITHOUT LOOKING IN MY WALLET AT MY LICENSE.

  I WAS TEXTING WITH BANDS THROUGHOUT THE NIGHT AND BOOKED SOME GOOD SHOWS. THAN I GET AN EMAIL THAT A MAJOR ARTIST I BOOKED WITH A 1/2 MILLION FOLLOWERS ON FACEBOOK CANCELLED A SHOW IN OCTOBER. I MOVED SOME LOCAL BANDS TO GIVE THIS ARTIST THE NIGHT AND HE CANCELS..........SON OF A BITCH.

  OFF TO BED WHERE I ACTUALLY SLEPT / PASSED OUT GOOD.

  SATURDAY      6 - 23 - 18

  I HAD TO BE GOOD...........AND COULDN'T GO TO BED.

  FRIDAY NIGHT I DRANK LIKE 10 MEN IF NOT ONE. THIS HAD TO CHANGE ESPECIALLY SINCE I HAVE A DOCTOR'S APPOINTMENT ON TUESDAY.

  I SLEPT GOOD AND WHEELS AND I TAKE A PUPPY FOR A WALK. THIS YOUNG DOG GOT A FULL WALK AND MAN DID IT HELP LATER IN THE EVENING BECAUSE THE THING WAS AS MELLOW AS A SLOTH AT THE END OF THE NIGHT.  WE ALSO MET SOME NEIGHBORS AND ANOTHER DOG.

  BACK HOME BREAKFAST IS READY. I DO NOT DO BREAD AND TRY TO EAT HEALTHY.

  WE CHILL ALITTLE BIT AND THAN HEAD TO A FUNNY PLACE CALLED " BARK & BREW ".  IT IS AN INDOOR / OUTDOOR BAR ESTABLISHMENT THAT ALLOWS YOU TO BRING YOUR DOG. IT IS FRIGGIN' HILARIOUS. I POSTED SOME PICTURES ON FACEBOOK AND SO DID OUR FRIENDS. I RECOMMEND THIS PLACE AND MY KIDS WOULD LOVE WORKING HERE. I WOULD NOT RECOMMEND EATING THERE LIKE WE DID. WHY ? WELL DOGS TEND TO PEE AND POOP ALOT. WITH 20 DOGS RUNNING AROUND THOSE ACTIONS CAN TAKE YOUR APPETITE AWAY ALONG WITH THE SMELL.  WE ENDED UP ORDERING FOOD BUT I WENT WITH A SMALL ANTIPASTI AND SPLIT IT WITH WHEELS. I HAD ONE SAM ADAMS SUMMER ALE.  THE YOUNG FEMALE WORKERS REALLY SEEMED TO ENJOY WORKING HERE WITH DOGS RUNNING ALL OVER THE PLACE. WE DETERMINED THIS BE A GREAT PLACE TO MEET FOR A FIRST DATE.

  BACK HOME WE CHILL AGAIN. WE WATCH THE PHILLIES BEAT THE NATIONALS AGAIN WHICH WAS REALLY NICE TO SEE. THE BULLPEN HELD ON. AFTER THE WIN WE WATCHED BALTIMORE , THE WORSE TEAM IN THE MLB , BEAT THE ATLANTA BRAVES. PHILLIES ARE 1 1/2 GAMES BACK OF FIRST PLACE.

  MORE FRIENDS STOP OVER AND IT WAS FUN TO CHILL AGAIN. THE BOOZE DID NOT EVEN COME CLOSE TO FRIDAY NIGHT. I DID GIN AND TONICS WITH LIMES AND NOTHING ELSE.  SOME FRIENDS DRANK WATER TONIGHT. MAN DID FRIDAY NIGHT BEAT US UP. 

 TALKED MOST OF THE NIGHT AND IT WAS FUN. I WAS CONSTANTLY KEEPING AN EYE ON NAIL SURVEILLANCE VIA MY PHONE AND COMPUTER. IT WAS WEIRD SEEING BOTH MY KIDS WORKING OUR BAR. I MOSTLY DID NOT LIKE IT. THEY DO AN EXCELLENT JOB BUT BEING IN THE BAR BUSINESS IS THE LAST THING I WANT THEM TO DO. I KNOW THE CASH MONEY IS EXCELLENT BUT MY YOUNGEST IS SO TINY.  IT ENDED UP A PACKED NIGHT AND THAT MADE ME FEEL GOOD FOR THEM. I CALLED AROUND 11:30PM AND TOLD THEM I WAS GOING TO BED ALONG WITH SOME SMALL PROCEDURES IN CLOSING.

  EVERYONE GOES TO BED EARLY. I MESS WITH MY COMPUTER AND PICK UP 2 SIDE JOBS. I DECIDE I CAN NOT GO TO BED UNTIL I WATCH MY KIDS CLOSE AND LEAVE. I WAS JUST TOO NERVOUS.  I CAUGHT ONE GIRL TAKING A DRINK OUTSIDE BUT BESIDES THAT EVERYTHING ELSE WENT SMOOTHLY FROM WHAT I SAW.

   A LITTLE AFTER 1AM THE KIDS CLOSE THE NAIL. I FEEL BETTER THAT THEY ARE SAFE AND HEAD TO BED AFTER 1AM. I SLEPT DECENT AND HAD SOME COOL DREAMS.

    SUNDAY          6 - 24 - 18

  THE PACE PICKED BACK UP AGAIN......NOT GOOD FOR ME.

   IT SUCKS TRYING TO BE GOOD EATING AND DRINKING WHEN HANGING OUT WITH FRIENDS WHO ARE EATING AND DRINKING. I HAVE BEEN TRYING TO BE GOOD ESPECIALLY SINCE I HAVE A DOCTOR'S APPOINTMENT ON TUESDAY. THE WEIGHT I LOST AND GOOD NUTRITION IS ALL BEING THROWN OUT THE WINDOW.

   WHEELS AND I TAKE A WALK. WE TAKE 2 DOGS WITH US. THE FIRST DOG IS A BULLDOG.........HE MADE IT 10 MINUTES SO WE BROUGHT HIM BACK HOME. THE 2ND DOG IS A PUP.......SHE MADE IT 20 MINUTES SO WE BROUGHT HER BACK HOME. WHEELS AND I JUST WENT HOME.

   TRYING TO BE HEALTHY IN THIS ENVIRONMENT IS JUST IMPOSSIBLE.  TODAY , 6 OF US LOADED UP AND HEAD TO A MARINA. THE LAKE IS OVER 1 MILLION SQUARE ACRES. WE STOP AT WALMART FOR SOME BAIT FOR FISHING AND MEET THE GIRLS AT THE DOCK. WE RENT A PONTOON BOAT AND CRUISE AROUND THIS GIGANTIC LAKE. WE ACTUALLY GOT LOST.  WE FISHED AND CAUGHT A SUNNY AND A CATFISH. WE TALKED TO SOME VERY COOL LOCALS AND TOOK A DIP IN THE 75 DEGREE WATER.  SOME HOAGIES AND BEER WERE CONSUMED.  THE BOAT CAME WITH A RADIO AND THE LOCAL STATION PLAYED OLD SCHOOL ROCK ALL DAY.

  I POSTED SOME PICTURES ON FACEBOOK THAT WERE KINDA COOL.

  BACK HOME WE ARE EXHAUSTED. I TAKE A RIDE WITH A FRIEND TO A VERY COOL BIKER BAR WITH BBQ FOOD.  WE PICK UP OUR ORDER AND HEAD BACK HOME.

  EVERYONE CHILLS AND BY 11PM MOST OF US ARE FALLING ASLEEP.  PHILLIES COMPLETELY SUCK ASS AND RUIN A 6 - 2 LEAD. NOT SURE WHY THEY TOOK OUT PIVATTA THE STARTING PITCHER.  THEY LOSE 8 - 6 AND THE BULLPEN BLOWS ANOTHER GAME.  NATIONALS STEAL THIS GAME AND AVOID A SWEEP.

  DURING THE NIGHT I HAD GIN & TONICS WITH LIME BUT WE RAN OUT OF TONIC. I FINISHED WITH 2 HIRAM WALKER BRANDY......DAMN IT. OH , I ALSO HAD SOME COORS LIGHT DURING FISHING AND MILLER LITES WHEN BACK AT HOME.

  BY 11:30PM I HEAD TO BED. I WAS SO DAMN TIRED.

   MONDAY        6 - 25 - 18

  FRONTIER ARILINES....................WAS ACTUALLY GOOD. 

  WHEELS AND I END OUR 4 DAY GET AWAY TO CHARLOTTE , NORTH CAROLINA. TOO MUCH FOOD AND BOOZE BUT IT WAS FUN.  THE FLIGHT THERE WAS GOOD SINCE WE FRIENDS TOOK OUR LUGGAGE AND BOOZE. THEY WERE DRIVING SO IT WAS A BIG HELP. WE CALLED FRONTIER AIRLINES 3 TIMES TO TRY TO GET A REFUND ON THE BAGGAGE WE ALREADY PAID FOR MONTHS AGO. WELP , NO REFUNDS , BUT WE COULD USE THEIR CREDIT TOWARDS UPGRADING SEATS OR FUTURE FLIGHTS. SO WE UPGRADED TO " FIRST CLASS " ON THE WAY HOME.  WE WERE IN THE 2ND ROW AND IT IS NICE TO HAVE. IT WAS THE FASTED I EVER GOT OFF A PLANE. WE ALSO USED OUR CREDIT TO UPGRADE A " CHECK - IN " BAG THAT WAS SUPPOSEDLY ALREADY PAID FOR. FROM THINKING WE LOST THIS MONEY EVERY PENNY WAS USED.

  MORE FRONTIER - A DESK GIRL STEPPED UP AND LET US USE THE REMAINING CREDIT FOR A NON-CHECKED-IN BAG.  I ALSO GOT TO EXPERIENCE " SPEED CHECK-IN ". THIS IS WERE YOU CAN BYPASS A 2 HOUR WAITING LINE AND GO RIGHT TO CUSTOMS' FOR SEARCHING STUFF.....NO TAKING SHOES OFF , NO OPENING COMPUTERS , NO METAL SEARCHES......RIGHT THROUGH. I AM NOT SURE IF THIS IS A GOOD THING FOR SAFETY BUT IT SAVED US 2 HOURS OF WAITING IN LINE. THIS WAS AWESOME GOING TO NORTH CAROLINA.  ON THE WAY HOME WE DID NOT HAVE THIS BYPASS LUXURY BUT THE LINES WERE SHORT SINCE WE TIMED IT PERFECTLY. IT TOOK US 30 MINUTES. WE DID GET TO TALK TO ONE 7 FOOT DOUCHE BAG THOUGH.

  THE DOUCHE BAG - HE COMPLAINED THE WHOLE TIME ABOUT SERVICE AND ONE TIME HE MISSED A WEDDING.  WE WERE IN LINE AND WHEN WE SAT IN OUR 2ND ROW SEATS ON THE WAY HOME.....HE WAS IN THE 1ST ROW.  FRONTIER OVER BOOKED 8 SEATS SO THEY OFFERED A $600 CREDIT TO WHOEVER WOULD GIVE UP THEIR SEAT. WE THOUGHT ABOUT IT BUT THE NEXT FLIGHT TO PHILADELPHIA WAS TOMORROW  WHICH WAS FINE BUT THE AIRPORT WAS TRENTON. I GOT ISSUES WITH TRENTON.  ANYWAY , BACK TO DOUCHEE , 2 SEATS ARE OPEN NEXT TO HIM. ONE YOUNG KID IS MOVED TO THE 1ST ROW BECAUSE HIS TICKET WAS DOUBLE BOOKED. NOT HIS FAULT . SO FRONTIER UPGRADED HIM TO THE 1ST ROW. WHAT DOES DOUCHEE SAY , " I PAID FOR MY UPGRADE , MUST BE NICE YOU DIDN'T. "  THE STEWARDESS IMMEDIATELY SAYS , "
 IT WAS OUR FAULT FOR DOUBLE BOOKING. HE HAS NO SEAT SO WE MOVED HIM HERE. "  THE STEWARDESS ASKS DOUCHEE TO MOVE TO THE WINDOW SEAT EVEN THOUGH HE WAS A MIDDLE SEAT.  THE AIRLINE ANNOUNCES EVERYONE IS CHECKED-IN AND WE ARE READY FOR TAKE OFF. NOT 30 SECONDS LATER 2 PEOPLE ARRIVE AND THEY ARE THE 1ST SEATS THAT WERE OPEN.  IT WAS PHILADELPHIA EAGLES RUNNING BACK DONNEL PUMPHREY AND HIS GIRLFRIEND. 

  CONTINUED - SO NOW THE YOUNG KID MOVED FROM THE BACK OF THE PLANE AND PROBABLY SITTING IN CARGO HAD TO MOVE BACK. PUMPHREY AND HIS GIRL FRIEND TOOK THEIR SEATS AND DOUCHE BAG HAD TO MOVE TO HIS ASSIGNED SEAT WHICH WAS IN THE MIDDLE. HE WAS NOT A HAPPY CAMPER.  

  SO , BESIDES THESE MINOR HICCUPS FRONTIER AIRLINES DID A VERY GOOD JOB OF BEING ON TIME BOTH TO AND FROM CHARLOTTE.

  OUR ELDEST ,  YOUNGEST , AND A FRIEND TIME IT PERFECTLY IN PICKING US UP AT THE AIRPORT.  I WAS ADVANCE TEXTING THEM AND IT WORKED NICELY. I TOOK OVER DRIVING AND WE WERE IN AND OUT OF THE AIRPORT WITHIN 10 SECONDS. WE STOP AT OUR KID'S FAVORITE PLACE....." NICK'S ROAST BEEF ". EVERYONE HAD WONDERFUL ROAST PORK , ROAST BEEF , AND ROASTED HAM SANDWICHES SMOTHERED WITH GRAVY AND SIDES OF CHEESE FRIES. I HAD A SMALL TINY PLATE OF BROCCOLI RABE AND ONE LONG HOT PEPPER WITH A GLASS OF WATER........NICE.

  BACK HOME WE UNLOAD AND SETTLE IN.  WE CHILL FOR A LITTLE BIT BUT THAN I TAKE A RIDE ON MY MOTORCYCLE WITH MY YOUNGEST. I ADORE SPENDING TIME WITH THIS KID. EVERYONE HASSLES ME WHEN I ASK THIS YOUNGSTER TO COME WITH ME BUT THEY DO NOT UNDERSTAND HOW MUCH I CHERISH EVERY SINGLE SECOND.  WE ARRIVE AT THE NAIL AROUND 8PM AND DO OUR NORMAL STUFF. I DECIDE TO CLOSE FOR THE NIGHT.

  WE TAKE A RIDE TO " RITA'S WATER ICE ". THE KID GETS ICE CREAM AND I GET NOTHING.

  BACK HOME I CHILL WITH WHEELS. I DRINK WATER THE WHOLE NIGHT WHILE WE WATCH THE PHILLIES GET COMPLETELY OUTCLASSED BY THE YANKEES. EVERY YANKEE PLAYER IS HUGE. IT WAS LIKE THE GAS HOUSE GORILLAS VERSE BUGS BUNNY. ALSO , MORE THAN HALF THE STADIUM WERE YANKEE FANS. PHILS LOSE 4 - 2.......BLOW.

 I HEAD TO BED PRETTY TIRED BY 11PM. I SLEPT DECENT.

  OH , JUST ONE MORE THING , I GOT A LETTER BEING SUBPOENAED TO APPEAR IN COURT NEXT MONTH. YEP , MY VACATION IS OVER. BACK TO THE CRAP.

   TUESDAY         6 - 26 - 18

 " DUFFIFIED " PODCAST. OVER 75,000 DOWNLOADS AND RATED IN THE TOP 10 PODCASTS FOR DOWNLOADS. WELL , MY INTERVIEW WITH CHEF DUFFY WAS RELEASED TONIGHT AND IT WAS FUN. DETAILS HOW TO LISTEN AT THE BOTTOM OF TODAY'S BLOG.

  START MY DAY WEEDING OUR DRIVEWAY SIDE GARDEN. OUR FRONT GARDENS LOOK ABSOLUTELY HORRIBLE. I BELIEVE JUMANJI 3 WILL BE FILMED HERE.  WE HAD 10 TRASHCANS LAST WEEK AND TODAY WE HAVE 6 MORE. I MUST ADMIT THE GARDEN LOOKS AWESOME WHEN DONE. NOW , I JUST HAVE 7 MORE TO GO.

  MOVE THE RABBIT TO THE GARAGE GARDEN. I MOVE THE RABBIT IN THE MORNING AND THAN THE KIDS MOVE IT BACK TO THE HUTCH AT NIGHT.

  TAKE A SHOWER AND HEAD TO MY DOCTOR'S APPOINTMENT. I AM NERVOUS MY SEMI-HARD WORK OF EATING RIGHT AND WALKING WAS THROWN DOWN THE DRAIN WHILE VACATIONING IN NORTH CAROLINA.  I AM IMMEDIATELY RECEIVED BY A HOT RECEPTIONIST. I BELIEVE SHE WANTED ME. I TAKE A SEAT AND WITHIN 2 MINUTES I WAS BEING ESCORTED BY A NURSE.  SHE WEIGHS ME AND I STRIP DOWN TO MY BOXERS IN THE HALLWAY. I LOST 7 POUNDS SINCE THE LAST VISIT. IT SHOULD OF BEEN MORE BUT I WILL TAKE IT.

  OK , I DIDN'T STRIP DOWN.

  DOCTOR TAKES MY BLOOD PRESSURE AND IT COMES IN 122 OVER 82....SOMETHING LIKE THAT. THE YOUNG DOCTOR PRAISES ME FOR GOOD WORK AND SAYS I'M THE BEST PATIENT HE HAS. HE PROBABLY HAS ME AND 2 OTHER PEOPLE OVER 95 BUT IT FELT GOOD.  HE TELLS ME I SHOULD GO GET BLOOD WORK DONE TO TAKE THE NEXT STEP. LABCORP IS 2 MINUTES AWAY. I COULD HAVE BLOOD CHECKED ALONG WITH CHOLESTEROL , ELECTROLYTES , H.E.P. 3 , DIABETES , LIVER ( UT OH ) , KIDNEY , AND MORE. SO , I SAY YES. HE PRINTS ME OUT PAPERWORK AND I HEAD OVER WHERE THE DOCTOR SENT MY FILES.

  I ARRIVE AT I AM 5TH IN LINE. I GET UP TO THE SEMI PISSED RECEPTIONIST AND SHE SAYS , " ALL SYSTEMS ARE DOWN ".  I REPLY , " YEP , OF COURSE THEY ARE. " AND LEAVE PISSED. WHY DIDN'T THEY JUST TELL ME THAT WHEN I GOT THERE ?

  BACK HOME I AM JONESING FOR AN ITALIAN HOAGIE I SAW IN THE FRIDGE LAST NIGHT. WELP , MY KID TOOK IT TO A SLEEP OVER.  I SETTLE WITH A CHICKEN SALAD AND TOMATO SANDWICH WITH WATER ON THE SIDE. I WATCH AN EPISODE OF " THE WALKING DEAD " WHICH WAS GOOD.

  THE KIDS AND I HEAD OUTSIDE TO LOAD UP THE TRASHCANS OF BRANCHES AND WEEDS I DID TODAY. WHEELS GETS HER HAIR CUT BY A GIRL WHO VISITS OUR HOUSE. SHE DID NOT SAY HI TO ME SO I JUST WENT OUTSIDE. I EVEN SAID TO MY KIDS OUTSIDE , " HOW DO YOU WALK IN SOMEONE'S HOUSE AND NOT SAY HELLO TO THE OWNER ? "  THE HAIR DRESSER DID NOT SAY HI TO MY KIDS EITHER.

 BACK INSIDE I CHILL WITH MY YOUNGEST AND WE TALK. I LOVE EVERY SECOND AS SHE TELLS ME A CONCERT SHE ATTENDED 2 DAYS AGO.

  OFF TO THE NAIL TO PREP AND BARTEND. I HAD A NICE LITTLE NIGHT AND GOT A TON OF BAND WORK DONE. I ALSO WATCH THE PHILLIES GET SMOKED AGAIN BY THE YANKEES.

  WHILE BARTENDING WE SEE RED AND BLUE LIGHTS. I GO OUTSIDE WITH SOME PATRONS AND THERE ARE A TON OF FIRE TRUCKS AND COPS. OUR NEIGHBOR ACROSS THE STREET WITH THE MECHANIC SHOP HAD A FUEL LEAK.

  GIVE A PATRON A RIDE HOME AND CHILL. I HAVE SOME WINE AND ONE BEER ( WHICH I REGRET) AND WATCH AN EPISODE OF " THE WALKING DEAD ". IT WAS GOOD. THE NEW BAD GUY IS AN EXCELLENT CHARACTER.

  I HAVE LISTENED TO THE CHEF DUFFY PODCAST TWICE NOW. WE HAVE REMARKABLE CHEMISTRY AND THE SHOW FLOWS SO QUICKLY. EVEN WHEELS HAS A LITTLE HELLO IN THE END. I USED HEAD PHONES AND JUST REALLY ENJOYED IT.  OVER 72,000 DOWNLOADS PER SHOW IS QUITE AN ACHIEVEMENT FOR DUFF........WHO USED TO BARTEND HERE.  HE HAS A LONG LONG LIST OF CREDENTIALS. JUST GOOGLE HIS NAME AND YOU WILL SEE. IN FACT , GOOGLE , " CHEF DUFFY INTERVIEWS BIG DADDY " AND IT COMES UP ON NUMEROUS WEBSITES. I'LL TRY NOT TO LET THE FAME GET TO MY HEAD.

  HERE IS HOW TO ACCESS THE SHOW AND " WARNING " ...CHEF DUFF CURSES.

In case you haven’t heard. Chef Duffy interviewed me on his extremely popular professional podcast. It was a lot of fun.

To listen :

- go to www.duffifiedlive.com

- click – “ Guests and Episodes

- click – “ Big Daddy “ ( starts at 11 mins and 40 seconds )

  ** Fasebook only -- ( my characture is not up yet BUT I inserted it below. Its me drinking a “ Dallas Sucks “ beer at an Eagles game ) **

 

   WEDNESDAY       6 - 27 - 18

  DOES EVERYBODY DO THIS MUCH IN ONE DAY ?

  LISTENED TO " DUFFIFIED LIVE " AGAIN AND I KNOW I AM SLIGHTLY BIAS BUT I REALLY ENJOYED IT. THERE IS A WONDERFUL FLOW BETWEEN CHEF DUFF AND I. I ALSO COMPLAINED A TINY BIT THAT MY CHARACTURE IS NOT ON THE " GUESTS AND EPISODES " WEBSITE PAGE. 50 OTHER PEOPLE WHO HAVE BEEN INTERVIEWED ALLLLLLL HAVE THEIR PICTURES ON THE SITE. I AM THE ONLY FRIGGIN' ONE WITHOUT A PROFILE PIC.........JESUS I SEE THIS BROKEN RECORD ALL THE FRICKIN' TIME. MY CHARACTURE IS ON THE 2 OTHER PAGES THAT SAY " CHRIS B _ _ _ _ _ _ _ " AND " BIG DADDY ". THE SECRETARY AND ENGINEER IN FLORIDA DID GET BACK TO ME QUICKLY AND SAID THEY FIX IT.

  MOVED THE RABBIT TO THE GARAGE GARDEN. I REALLY DO NOT FEEL THE LOVE FROM THIS RABBIT FOR DOING THIS. I MEAN IT IS A LARGE SCREENED GARDEN WITH VEGGIES AND ROOM TO HOP AROUND AND COVER TO HIDE. I NEVER GET A NOD OF APPRECIATION OR NOTHING FROM THIS RABBIT.

  MY YOUNGEST AND I SLICE TURKEY AND MOZZARELLA CHEESE. YES , I HAVE A DELI SLICER AT MY HOUSE. INSTEAD OF PAYING $9 A POUND I PAY $2.  WE FREEZE MOST OF IT AND USE AS NEEDED. AS MY KID SAYS , "
 FRESH CUT TURKEY IS THE BEST TIME TO HAVE IT. " SO........I MADE TURKEY GRINDERS FOR US.  WE ALSO WATCHED AN EPISODE OF " THE WALKING DEAD ". IT WAS VERY GOOD.

 TRASH MEN TAKE 6 CANS OF WEEDS. OUR DRIVEWAY GARDEN LOOKS EXCELLENT.  I AM JUST SO BUMMED AND HANDCUFFED ABOUT THE FRONT GARDENS. IT REALLY LOOKS BAD AND I AM SURPRISED THE NEIGHBORS ARE NOT SAYING ANYTHING. GOING ON 8 WEEKS WITH THIS WEEDING COMPANY. I HAVE THE MOTTO " I WILL NOT WRITE HARASSING " EMAILS TO THE COMPANY.

  OFF TO LAB CORP TO GIVE BLOOD AND URINE SAMPLES. MY LAST 3 TIMES HERE HAVE BEEN UNPLEASANT. ALL THE WORKERS ARE PISSED AT LIFE AND MOVING PATIENTS IS SLOW. WELP , THEY REDEEMED THEMSELVES BIG TIME.  I ARRIVE AND ONE OLD LADY IS WAITING. I AM RECEIVED RIGHT AWAY AND THE GIRL BEHIND THE GLASS BEGINS MY PAPER WORK. NOT 30 SECONDS LATER A GUY OLDER THAN DIRT WALKS OUT. THE OLD WIFE SAYS , " WOW , THAT WAS FAST !! IN & OUT !! "  THEY WOBBLE OUT.  ME , I AM ASKED TO GO TO ROOM 2. THE NURSE TAKES 3 VILES OF BLOOD IN LESS THAN 30 SECONDS. I EVEN SAY TO HER , " YOU'VE DONE THIS A COUPLE OF TIMES HAVEN'T YOU ? " SHE GIGGLES. I ALSO SAY HELLO AND GOODBYE TO ANOTHER NURSE WHO I THINK REALLY APPRECIATED MY KIND WELCOMING GESTURES. BY THE WAY SHE WAS LOOKING AT ME WITH APPRECIATION I THINK SHE WANTED A SPERM SAMPLE.

  THEY ALSO ASK FOR A URINE SAMPLE SO I GO OUTSIDE TO THE WATER FOUNTAIN AND DRINK 3 FULL CUPS. I AM GUIDED TO THE MEN'S BATHROOM AND I LOCK THE DOOR BEHIND ME. I RUN THE FAUCET TO HELP ME THINK PEE. IT'S REALLY EMBARRASSING TO PULL OUT MY TINY COCK AND PEE INTO A TINY CUP.  THE TIP OF MY COCK FIT IN THE TINY CUP WAY TOO EASILY. I WAS ACTUALLY ASHAMED THAT MY PENIS IS SMALLER THAN A LIGHT SWITCH.  I LEAVE THE PEE SAMPLE ON A TABLE WHERE THEY TOLD ME AND THE NURSE SAID , " YOU'RE ALL DONE. " I WAS THERE LESS THAN 4 MINUTES. CHEERS LAB CORP........CHEERS.

  BACK HOME I GATHER MY 2 KIDS. WE HEAD TO A RENTAL PROPERTY TO DO A PRETTY BIG JOB. THE FEMALE RENTER IS DOING LAWN WORK OUT FRONT BUT IT IS THE BACK YARD I AM CONCERNED WITH AND SAID I HELP. IT LOOKS LIKE THE MOVIE " JUMANJI ". WE HAD TO BREAK AND CUT DOWN A TRAMPOLINE AND  A PITCH RETURN CONTRAPTION FOR KIDS.  I HAD THE PERFECT TOOL TO CUT THESE METAL TUBING THINGS DOWN.......MY SAWZ SALL WITH A METAL BLADE. IT WORKED ABSOLUTELY PERFECT. " HAVING THE RIGHT TOOL " AS MY BROTHER ALWAYS SAYS.

 THE YARD LOOKS HORRIBLE. THE GRASS IS A FOOT HIGH AND MANY WEEDS ARE 5 FEET HIGH. A GIRLS KID'S BIKE WAS LEANING ON A TREE AND IVY GREW OVER IT. I COULD ONLY SEE A WHEEL. SO NOW YOU GET THE PICTURE. THE FEMALE RENTER USES MY LAWN MOWER TO CUT THE FRONT YARD WHILE WE LOAD UP THE 100 PIECES OF METAL INTO MY VAN.  WE ALSO TREE CLIP LOW HANGING BRANCHES AND THROW THEM IN A PILE IN THE VERY BACK OF THE YARD IN SOME BRUSH. WE GET DONE AND I GO TO GET OUR LAWN MOWER. THE RENTER TOLD ME SHE BROUGHT IT HOME. THE KIDS AND I DRIVE THE VAN HOME AND I WALK THE LAWN MOWER BACK TO THE RENTAL PROPERTY.  THE MOWER STARTS AND I BEGIN MOWING. I AM AFRAID OF HITTING HIDDEN SPRINGS FROM THE TRAMPOLINE AND OTHER TOYS LIKE HARD BALLS IN THE DEEP GRASS. WELL........I HIT A LARGE LACROSSE BALL AND MY MOWER STOPS. IT WILL NOT START AGAIN. I ONLY GOT HALF THE LAWN DONE.

  WALK THE MOWER HOME AND GET MY RIDING MOWER. I DRIVE THIS BACK AND FINISH THE LAWN. I SEE 2 BIG TRAMPOLINE SPRINGS BEFORE RUNNING THEM OVER. THE BACK YARD STILL NEEDS MORE WORK BUT IT LOOKS 10X BETTER. THE RENTER TEXTS AND THANKS ME.

   ALMOST WENT TO THE PHILLIES GAME TONIGHT BUT THE YANKEE BRASS WAS BEING ENTERTAINED BY THE PHILLIES BRASS WHICH MEANS........WE GOT PUSHED OUT. OF COURSE THE PHILLIES WIN.....WHICH IS GOOD.

  OFF TO THE NAIL AND I STOP AT OUR DUMPSTER. MAN THIS THING IS GOLD. I UNLOAD ALL OF THE TRAMPOLINE'S AND BATTING CAGE'S METAL TUBING PIECES ALONG WITH NETTING AND CANVAS.  IT WAS A TON OF STUFF AND FILLS THE DUMPSTER.

  AT THE NAIL I BEGIN MY NORMAL STUFF. BY 10PM I HAD CHANGED THE DEEP FRYER OIL , CALLED & TALKED TO BANDS , SENT EMAILS , SENT TEXTS , FINISHED JULY CALENDARS , SET UP A SIDE JOB FOR TOMORROW , STOCKED LIQUOR , MADE A FACEBOOK AD FOR THE WEEKEND BANDS , CLEANED BATHROOMS , AND SOME MORE STUFF I JUST DON'T REMEMBER.

  BACK HOME I CHILL WITH WHEELS. I HAVE SOME WINE AND HORSE RADISH CHEESE AND LOW FAT , LOW SALT , LOW CALORIE , LOW ASS , AND  LOW TASTE CHIPS. WE WATCH AN EPISODE OF " BROCKMIRE " WHICH WAS EXCELLENT. THE OPENING SCENE WAS FAR FROM FUNNY AND WAS ACTUALLY SUPER DARK AND CONTROVERSIAL SUBJECT.  IT WAS A SCENE OF RUSSIAN ROULETTE........AND I JUMPED.

 CHILL SOME MORE AND TRY TO WATCH A SEASON 7 FINALE OF " THE WALKING DEAD " BUT OUR NETFLIX WAS NOT WORKING........SO I WATCHED HOGAN'S HEROES AND FAMILY GUY AND WENT TO BED.

   THURSDAY        6 - 28 - 18

   " MISTER FIELDING !!   YOUR NUMBER CAME UP...........WE WORK TODAY !! "

    I WILL BELIEVE IT WHEN I SEE IT BUT THE WEEDING COMPANY EMAILED AND SAID THEY WILL COME OUT THIS SUNDAY. I REPLIED , " AWESOME !!!!  I WILL HAVE DRINKS AND COOKIES FOR THE GUYS. "   WHEELS LOOKS AT ME LIKE I'M A SUCK UP JACK ASS.  DO THEY KNOW IT WILL BE 105 DEGREES ?

    ELDEST SAYS  , " MOM , WHAT WAS THAT NOISE ? "   WHEELS REPLIES , " IT WAS YOUR FATHER'S WHOLE CLOSET SHELF COLLAPSING. WE'LL TELL HIM WHEN HE GETS HOME FROM HIS SIDE JOB THAT HE HAS ANOTHER SIDE JOB. "    

   WHAT THE HECK IS A TRIGLYCERIDE ?  DEFINITION - FAT IN YOUR BLOOD. THIS LEADS TO STROKES. I HAVE A LOT OF IT I THINK.

    MY DOCTOR CALLED AND SAID THE 2ND STEP OF THE PHYSICAL WAS GOOD. BOTH BLOOD AND URINE TESTS WERE IN. I ALWAYS WAIT FOR THE " BUT ". ACROSS THE BOARD EVERYTHING WAS NORMAL AND WITHIN THE PARAMETERS OF HEALTHY. " BUT "........2 THINGS WERE SLIGHTLY A CONCERN.

 ONE - CHOLESTEROL - MINE IS 221. STANDARD RANGE IS 100 - 199. THE DOCTOR WAS NOT REAL CONCERNED WITH THIS.

 TWO - TRIGLYCERIDES - MINE IS 533. STANDARD RANGE IS 0 - 149. YEP.....I'M FAT.  AGAIN , THE DOCTOR DID NOT SEEM REAL ALARMED IN THIS NUMBER BUT TO ME IT IS HIGH.  SO BESIDES TRYING TO BYPASS BEER AND BRANDY HE NOW WANTS ME TO CUT DOWN ON SWEETS AND WHITE BREAD.  YEP.........MY FOOD LIFE JUST GOT WORSE. I DID SEND A MESSAGE TO MY DOCTOR TO SEE IF THIS 533 NUMBER IS HIGH OR DO THESE NUMBERS GO MUCH HIGHER...................LIKE TO A MILLION.

  I ALSO GOT A WEBSITE LINK FROM MY DOCTOR WHICH IS KINDA COOL. IT IS CALLED " MY CHART ". YOU CAN ACCESS EVERY DOCTOR VISIT AND WHAT THEY WROTE DOWN ALONG WITH ANY TEST RESULT OR SURGERIES OR WHATEVER VIA COMPUTER OR PHONE. I ACCESS IT TONIGHT AROUND MIDNIGHT AND THERE WERE NO RESULTS IN MY BLOOD & URINE TESTS. I EMAIL THEM. BY 8AM THE NEXT MORNING THE RESULTS WERE POSTED. YOU CAN ALSO TALK TO YOUR DOCTOR AND PRE-SCHEDULE VISITS SO WAITING AT THE OFFICE IS AVOIDED.

  OK , SO LET'S START MY DAY. WHEELS WORKS FROM HOME WHICH IS ALWAYS COOL. SHE LIKES TO GO TOPLESS IN FRONT OF THE COMPUTER WHICH HELPS MY BLOOD PRESSURE STAY LOW.

   I TOLD MY YOUNGEST LAST NIGHT ABOUT OUR SIDE JOB TOMORROW , " IF YOU WANT TO SLEEP IN AT YOUR SLEEP-OVER THAT IS FINE. I WILL WAIT UNTIL 10:30AM BECAUSE I TOLD THE CUSTOMER I BE THERE BY 11AM. DON'T YOU KNOW THIS KID TEXTS ME AT 9:30AM AND SAYS , " COME GET ME. " MY HEART WAS FILLED WITH JOY.  I EVEN DID A LITTLE TEST WHEN I PICKED HER UP. I ASKED , " SO , SINCE SCHOOL HAS BEEN OVER YOU HAVE BEEN SLEEPING IN BED UNTIL 1 OR 2 PM. YOU HAVE A SLEEPOVER AT A FRIENDS AND I EXPECTED THE SAME THING. WHY TEXT ME SO EARLY TO GET YOU ? " THE KID RESPONDED , " I WANTED TO GO TO THE SIDE JOB WITH YOU. " A TEAR ROLLED DOWN MY CHEEK AND MY YOUNGEST SAYS , " YOU ALRIGHT ? "  I REPLY , " ALLERGIES. "

  2 THINGS - WHEELS DOES NOT GO TOPLESS AND I KNOW MY YOUNGEST WAS JUST GOING ON THE SIDE JOB FOR MONEY.

  ELDEST GETS AN APPLICATION AT BARNABY'S NEAR HER COLLEGE. SHE WAS TOLD TO TALK TO A MANAGER BUT IT WAS TOO BUSY WITH A PRIVATE PARTY. SHE WILL RETURN ON SUNDAY. MAN , I HOPE THIS KID GETS THIS JOB.

  MAKE BREAKFAST FOR MYSELF , WHEELS , AND MY YOUNGEST. THAN OFF TO A SIDE JOB WITH MY YOUNGEST IN DREXEL HILL. IT WAS A QUICK JOB OF 90 MINUTES. THE LONGEST PART WAS GOING TO LOWES TO LOOK FOR AN A/C FILTER. LOWES HAS 100'S OF THEM. OF COURSE , WE COULD NOT FIND THE SIZE WE NEED. SO I SUGGESTED A CUT-TO-SIZE FILTER. THE LOWES WORKER NEEDED A CRANE TO GET UP TO THE TOP OF THE 4TH SHELF. I ASKED IF MY KID COULD TAKE THE RIDE. I EMBARRASSED HER AND HE SAID NO BECAUSE OF SAFETY RULES.

  MORE EMBARRASSMENT - AT LOWES WE ARE LOOKING FOR A CERTAIN LIGHT BULB. I AM COMPLAINING THAT I FEEL FAT BUT CAN'T REALLY SEE IT. I TELL MY KID , " I CAN SEE MY FEET , KNEES , AND THIGHS BUT I FEEL HUGE. IN FACT , THERE IS A VIDEO OF ME ON THE PONTOON BOAT IN NORTH CAROLINA.  I HAVE NO SHIRT ON AND LOOK SO DAMN DISGUSTING. "  WE WALK AROUND AN ISLE AND A HUGE ROUND GUY WITH A BLACK SHIRT , BLUE JEANS , AND A BALD HEAD IS RIGHT THERE. HE IS MY TWIN. I BELIEVE GOD WAS TELLING ME SOMETHING.  I SAY TO MY KID , " STAND BEHIND ME AND TAKE A PICTURE OF BOTH OF US. " I POSITION MYSELF JUST LIKE THE GUY AND BEHIND HIM ON AN ANGLE BUT MY KID SAYS , " NO. " I LIP , " C'MON !! " SHE SAYS , " NOOOOO. " I WHISPER ," WILL YOU JUST TAKE THE PICTURE ? "  MY YOUNGEST TAKES THE PICTURE AND IS GIGGLING AND SHAKING HER HEAD.  WALKING AWAY I SAY TO MY KID , " MAN , THAT WAS PRETTY LOW TAKING A PICTURE LIKE THAT. " SHE BLURTS OUT , " YOU TOLD ME TOO !!! "  I RESPOND , " I REALLY DON'T LIKE YOU GOING TO THE DARK SIDE OF MY FAMILY NAME. YOU MUST GO TO THE GOOD SIDE OF YOUR MOTHER'S NAME. SHE REPLIES , " YOU KNOW......THEY CAN BE CRAZY TOO. "

  AFTER THE SIDE JOB WE STOP AT THE GAS STATION ( SUNOCO ON ROUTE 1 - $2.87. IT WAS PACKED ) AND THAN AT MY PARENTS HOUSE FOR LUNCH.  MY KID HAS PASTENE AND I KINDA HAD A HAM AND BROCCOLI RABE SANDWICH. MY DAD IS STILL COOKING THE PASTENE AND GIVES ME THE " HAM " SANDWICH. I OPEN IT UP AND THERE IS ONE THIN SLICE OF HAM ACROSS THE WHOLE ROLL ....ONE SLICE !!!  AND WITH ONE PIECE OF BROCCOLI RABE ON HALF OF IT. I SHOW IT TO MY YOUNGEST AND SHE GIGGLES.

  BACK HOME I TRY TO REST BECAUSE I AM BARTENDING TONIGHT. I WATCH A GOOD SEASON 7 FINALE OF " THE WALKING DEAD ". BUT ONE 20 SECOND SCENE HAD ME CHEERING AND CRYING. I REPLAYED IT 4 TIMES !!

 WHAT TOTALLY SUCKS IS SEASON 8 OF " THE WALKING DEAD " COSTS MONEY. I HAVE 4 WAYS OF WATCHING IT.......AMC ON-DEMAND , NETFLIX , AMAZON , AND YOU-TUBE. ALL COST MONEY. I COULDN'T BELIEVE IT. NETFLIX MOST LIKELY WILL RELEASE SEASON 8 IN OCTOBER. MY QUESTION IS DO I PAY MONEY TO WATCH IT NOW OR WAIT 4 MONTHS.

  LOAD UP MOTORCYCLE AND DO A SMART THING......I SHORTEN MY LAPTOP COMPUTER STRAP SO IT DOES NOT BOUNCE WHEN I RIDE. I THINK MY LAST COMPUTER SHUFFLED AROUND TOO MUCH ON MY LAST BIKE AND BROKE. NOW , IT FREELY HANGS OFF MY SHOULDER WHILE I RIDE.

  NEW OPEN MIC CALLED " JUST JAM ". TO MY SURPRISE 6 MUSICIANS CAME IN AT 8PM. IT WAS THE MOST WE HAD IN MANY WEEKS. PUT IT THIS WAY. WHEN I STAY TO 2AM....IT WAS A GOOD NIGHT.

  PHILLIES WITH A HUGE WIN OVER THE NATIONALS.

  ROLL HOME ON A BEAUTIFUL NIGHT. I PULL INTO THE GARAGE AND SEE THE PET RABBIT IN HER HUTCH. I LET MY DOG OUT AND WAIT ABOUT 5 MINUTES AT MOST. THIS IS A LITTLE LONG SO I GO TO THE DOOR AND SEE A WHITE AND ORANGE CAT ALONG MY PATIO ON THE DRIVEWAY SIDE. I GO OUTSIDE AND THE CAT CHASES A WILD RABBIT BIG TIME. THAN MY DOG CHASES THE CAT WHO IS CHASING THE RABBIT. BOTH CAT AND DOG GROWLING AND SCAMPERING LIKE A BENNY HILL CHASE SCENE. ALL HELL HAS BROKEN LOOSE. BOTH CAT AND RABBIT GOT AWAY. MY DOG COMES BACK ALL RILED UP AND PROUD.....SHE SHOWED THEM.

  ON A SAD NOTE.......ANOTHER GUNMAN GOES ON A SHOOTING SPREE IN ANNAPOLIS MARYLAND. WHAT A WORLD.

  WHILE WRITING THIS BLOG MY DOCTOR ALREADY GOT BACK TO ME ON MY QUESTION ABOUT HIGH TRIGLYCERIDES. THIS " MY CHART " WEBSITE IS VERY EFFICIENT :  ( DAMN.....FRIED FOODS WAS ADDED TO THE NO EAT LIST )

      Hi, Chris

We typically don't treat high triglycerides until you get into the greater than 800 range. You are right that yours are well above the normal range of 150 and warrant surveillance to make sure that they don't creep into the higher levels at which point we would have concerns that it could cause pancreatitis. Like we talked about on the phone, I don't think it warrants treatment at this time, especially because I feel that when we recheck the labs in 6 months the numbers will come down due to the lifestyle changes you have recently made. Keep doing what you are doing and watch the sweets, carbs, and fried foods and the triglycerides and cholesterol numbers should come down. The Mediterranean diet is a great way to improve these number
s.

   FRIDAY    6 - 29 - 18

  SIDE JOB LEADS TO A SIDE JOB LEADS TO A SIDE JOB....BUT NOT WHAT YOU THINK.

  MY DOUBLE WIDE CLOSET COLLAPSES.  THE WEIGHT OF EXCESSIVE CLOTHES AND BOXES IS WAY TOO MUCH. I REMOVE EVERYTHING , SECURE THE SHELF , AND MY YOUNGEST HELPS ME PUT EVERYTHING BACK.  I FEEL PRETTY GOOD ABOUT IT BECAUSE THIS TIME I SECURED THE SUPPORTS INTO STUDS. 8 HOURS LATER I GET A CALL FROM MY YOUNGEST......IT FELL AGAIN. THE 2ND COLLAPSES WAS NOT AS BAD BUT AGAIN.....WAY TOO MUCH WEIGHT.

 RETURNING TO A SIDE JOB TO DO PLUMBING WORK. THIS TIME WITH A FRIEND. I WILL DO THIS JOB ON SUNDAY. YEP....SUNDAY...BECAUSE EVERYDAY IS THE SAME WITH ME.

  THE HEAT WAVE IS COMING.

  I ASKED FOR A CONFIRMATION CALL , TEXT , OR EMAIL BY THE WEEDING COMPANY TO SEE WHEN THEY ARRIVE ON SUNDAY.......IN THE 105 DEGREE HEAT. I NEVER GOT IT.

  STILL KINDA BUMMING I CAN NOT CONTINUE TO WATCH " THE WALKING DEAD " WITHOUT PAYING FOR THE 8TH SEASON. I PAY FOR CABLE....AND THEY CHARGE EXTRA. I PAY FOR NETFLIX.....AND THE CHARGE EXTRA. WHAT A FRIGGIN' RACKET. I MAY START WATCHING " FEAR THE WALKING DEAD " WHICH IS A PREQUEL AND GETS VERY GOOD REVIEWS.

  I DID FINISH " THE RANCH ". IT WAS VERY GOOD AND THE MAIN CHARACTER GOT BOOTED OFF THE SHOW FOR REAL LIFE CHARGES AGAINST GIRLS. ACTOR DANNY MATHESON FROM THE POPULAR TV SITCOM " THAT 70'S SHOW " IS OUT.

   THIS WOULD BE A VERY GOOD WEEK TO USE OUR POOL MEMBERSHIP. THE HEAT WAVE IS HERE AND I KNOW EVERY TIME I GO TO THE POOL I SAY , " JESUS I LOVE COMING HERE. "  WE HAVE NOT GONE ONCE YET.

  THE BIG NEWS IS.....COMCAST. SOME ONE GOT FIRED. THE BEST POST I SAW WAS A FACEBOOK PICTURE FROM THE MOVIE " AIRPLANE ".  A BALD GUY , IN AN AIR TRAFFIC CONTROL TOWER , IS SHOWN PULLING A PLUG AND HOLDING IT UP WHILE SINISTERLY SMILING. THE RUNWAY LIGHTS GO OFF JUST AS THE HERO IS ABOUT TO LAND THE TROUBLED PLANE. WELL , SOMEONE AT COMCAST CUT A MAJOR MAIN FIBER LINE FROM A NEIGHBORING PROVIDER. THIS AFFECTED PHONE , CABLE , AND INTERNET THROUGHOUT THE NATION. I GOT TO FIND OUT VIA OUR CONDO RENTER WHO CALLED ME IMMEDIATELY. I WALKED HER THROUGH THE NORMAL STEPS AND IT DID WORK BUT SHE WAS TELLING ME SHE ONLY HAD 20 CHANNELS WHEN SHE SHOULD HAVE 200.  MY EMAILS WERE NOT RUNNING SO WAS THIS A COINCIDENCE ?

  I SEMI - FIXED THE PROBLEM AT BEST BUT NOT ENTIRELY AT THE CONDO. I TRIED 4 COMCAST PHONE NUMBERS AND EVERYONE WAS UNAVAILABLE OR BUSY. THE RENTER WENT TO THE BEACH WHILE I INVESTIGATED. LUCKILY , WHEELS SEES AN ACTION NEWS REPORT ABOUT COMCAST GOING DOWN NATIONWIDE. IT WAS A RELIEF TO KNOW IT WASN'T OUR PROBLEM. I TEXT THE RENTER THE NEWS AND SHE TEXTS ME BACK 2 HOURS LATER , " EVERYTHING IS BACK TO NORMAL YEAH !! "

  I SAID THIS BEFORE. IT IS ABSOLUTELY WONDERFUL HAVING VACATION HOMES ON THE BEACH AND ON A LAKE IN THE POCONOS. BUT........NOT USING THEM KINDA SUCKS.  IT IS AWESOME WE ARE HAVING OUR BEST YEAR IN RENTING.....( AND LAST YEAR WAS OUR BEST THAN ). BUT..........WE CAN'T USE THEM FOR A COUPLE OF MONTHS WHICH IS NO FUN. I REALLY LOVE GOING TO BOTH PLACES.

  NOTHING LIKE A GOOD THICK BURGER COOKED MEDIUM WELL ( AT MOST ).  WHEELS SAUTÉS SOME MUSHROOMS AND ONIONS WHILE I DO THE BURGERS. I ATE 2 LARGE ONES WHICH WAS TOO MUCH. I DID NOT USE ROLLS WHICH SO BLOWS. EATING A BURGER WITH A FORK AND KNIFE IS JUST NOT RIGHT. BUT I HAVE TO ADMIT THE BURGERS WITH MOZZARELLA , ONIONS , AND MUSHROOMS WAS PRETTY DAMN GOOD.

   OFF TO THE NAIL ON MY BIKE. THE NIGHT STARTED OUT SLOW AND I DID NOT HAVE A GOOD FEELING BUT IT MAN DID IT PICK UP.  A COUPLE OF FUN THINGS HAPPENED TONIGHT: ( I POSTED ON FACEBOOK )

  - MUSICALLY , OVERALL 4 BANDS COMBINED , WAS IN THE TOP 10 BEST PERFORMANCES I HAVE SEEN HERE AT THE NAIL IN 21 YEARS.

  - WHEELS AND A FRIEND MAKE A VISIT. THEY REALLY TIPPED THE BARTENDER BIG TIME......BIG.....TIME.

  - A GOOD SIZED CROWD AND SOME OF THE HOTTEST GIRLS TONIGHT. IT WAS THE FIRST TIME I REMEMBER MORE GIRLS THAN GUYS.

  I MOVED THE BANDS ALONG , WAS SUPER PLEASANT TO ALL PATRONS , HELPED ANOTHER MOTORCYCLIST PARK NEXT TO MY BIKE , PLAYED WITH ONE GIRL WHO KEPT TOUCHING ME ( MAN IN MY DAY I SO WOULD OF.......WELL. ) , AND OVERALL A REALLY FUN NIGHT WITH GOOD PEOPLE IN ATTENDANCE.

  MY ELDEST WAS THE BARTENDER AND I ALWAYS LOVE WORKING WITH HER.  SHE HAS 2 FRIENDS COME IN AT 1:15AM. ALL OF US DO A FULL CLOSE. THEY WERE A BIG HELP AND IT WAS AN EXCELLENT CLOSE. I EVEN CHANGED THE MARQUEE SIGN WHICH HELPS THE NEXT DAY.

  WE ALL ROLL OUT TOGETHER. MY ELDEST GIVES A RIDE FOR HER FRIENDS TO THE SEPTA LOTS WHILE I FOLLOW ON MY BIKE. WE FOLLOW EACH OTHER UNTIL THEY WENT TO THE FRIEND'S HOUSE.

   I HEAD INSIDE AND HAVE SOME WINE. I TRY TO WATCH " LUKE CAGE " SEASON 2 OPENER BUT FELL ASLEEP WITHIN 30 MINUTES.

  OFF TO BED WHERE I SEE MY CLOSET FELL AGAIN. MY YOUNGEST WAS NICE ENOUGH TO MOVE THE BOXES. SHE WAS UP WHEN I GOT HOME WHICH WAS SO COOL.

    SATURDAY        6 - 30 - 18

  AFTER 21 YEARS YOU THINK I FRICKIN' LEARN.

  FIX DOUBLE CLOSET SHELF PART II - THIS TIME I HAD TO GET WHEELS INVOLVED. SHE HAS CLOTHES FROM THE 70'S IN MY CLOSET.  I REMOVED ALL CLOTHES ON HANGARS AND SHOES. IT WAS TIME TO RE-ORGANIZE AND CONSOLIDATE. I WENT TO MY VERY LOCAL HARDWARE STORE ( MY BASEMENT ) AND FOUND MORE ANCHORS FOR THE 10 FOOT WIDE SHELF UNIT.  I SECURED THE SHELVING AGAIN AND IT WAS TIME TO RE-HANG STUFF. I HUNG MY 6 SHIRTS AND PUT AWAY 3 PAIRS OF SHOES. WHEELS WENT THROUGH 200 OUTFITS AND 50 PAIRS OF SHOES. SHE DONATED 2 LARGE BAGS OF CLOTHES , THREW OUT ONE BAG , AND HUNG THE REST. THE 400 POUND LOAD OF CLOTHES IS NOW A REASONABLE 100 POUND LOAD OF CLOTHES ON THE SHELVING UNIT. THIS TASK IS DONE.

   WHEELS MAKES BREAKFAST - MY YOUNGEST HAS A WONDERFUL EGG, CHEESE , AND BACON SANDWICH ON AN ENGLISH MUFFIN. SHE MAKES ME A BEAUTIFUL CAPRESE SALAD......SLICE MOZZARELLA & SLICED TOMATOES IN AN OIL & BASIL DRESSING. OH MY GOD IT WAS SO GOOD !!! AND I WOULD SO NOT PREFER MY KID'S EGG SANDWICH.

  YES......SARCASM WAS USED ABOVE.

  KIDS HEAD TO THE 104.5 MUSIC FESTIVAL WITH SOME BANDS I RECOGNIZE LIKE IMAGINE DRAGON , JUDAH & THE LION , AND A J R. IT ALWAYS MAKES US NERVOUS WHEN OUR KIDS DRIVE TO CAMDEN BUT THEY MADE IT TO AND FROM .........AND HAD A GOOD TIME. THEY EVEN LEFT EARLY TO BEAT THE TRAFFIC WHICH WAS VERY SMART. THEY SENT ME A BEAUTIFUL PICTURE OF THEM AND A FRIEND AT THE CONCERT. I WILL POST IT ON FACEBOOK.

  I TRY TO REST SINCE I AM ON DOOR TONIGHT.  I FADE IN AND OUT OF SLEEPING WHILE WATCHING SOME WORLD CUP SOCCER.

  WHEELS AND I DECIDE TO GO TO OUR LOCAL POOL FOR THE FIRST TIME THIS YEAR. AS I ALWAYS SAY..........IT WAS WONDERFUL. THE WATER HAD A SLIGHT CHILL WHEN ENTERING. WHEELS AND I TALKED FOR ABOUT 1 1/2  HOURS. I ALSO SWAM LAPS AND DID RESISTANCE WALKING IN THE WATER. I ALSO SCARED MANY LITTLE KIDS BECAUSE I LOOK LIKE A WHALE SHARK IN THE WATER.....THE LARGEST LIVING CREATURE IN THE SEA. IT'S ALWAYS GOOD TO GO HERE.

  DRIVE HOME AND STOP AT OUR VERY LOCAL CLOTHES DONATION BIN. WE DROP OFF WHEEL'S 2 BIG BAGS OF CLOTHES FROM THE LATE 1960'S TO EARLY 1970'S. IF YOU SEE A HOMELESS LADY WITH A SHORT BLACK LEATHER SKIRT WITH A LEATHER TOP TO MATCH.............IT WAS WHEELS.

  BACK HOME WE SETTLE IN FOR JUST 45 MINUTES. WHEELS SHOWERS WHILE I CHANGE.  SHE IS GOING TO A BBQ WHILE I AM HEADING TO THE NAIL.  SINCE SHE IS GOING TO DINNER WE DECIDE TO HAVE A HEALTHY APPETIZER. SOME AWESOME COLD EXTRA LARGE SHRIMP WITH COCKTAIL SAUCE ON THE SIDE. I AM TRYING TO EAT HEALTHY AND CUT DOWN ON SALT SO SHRIMP HAS TO BE OKAY FOR YOU RIGHT ?

  WELP.....THE LARGE BAG OF EXTRA LARGE SHRIMP HAS A TON OF SALT IN IT. I MILES OF JUST ATE A DEER SALT LICK.  THE SHRIMP IS OKAY FOR YOU BUT THE PACKING COMPANY USES SALT TO PRESERVE THE SHELF LIFE OF THE SHRIMP. BESIDES SALT , THEY USE A SALT PRESERVATIVE CALLED " SODIUMATONOFFATTYIOUS " TO KEEP THE SHELF LIFE OF SHRIMP FRESH FOR UP TO 12 DECADES.  I LOOKED AT THE AMOUNT OF SALT CONTENT ON THE INGREDIENT LABEL. ONE LICK OF A SHRIMP HAS 35,000 MILLIGRAMS OF SALT. THIS IS JUST LICKING IT !!

  OFF TO THE NAIL ON MY MOTORCYCLE. IT WAS A WONDERFUL RIDE. I HOPE I SAVE GAS FOR OUR CARS BECAUSE THE PRICES HAVE HIT $3 AGAIN....SOME STATIONS ARE A LITTLE LOWER.

  I GOT TO ARRIVE LATE WHICH WAS REALLY GOOD. WE DID SUCH A GOOD CLOSE LAST NIGHT I COULD ARRIVE LATE WHICH IS ALWAYS A NICE LITTLE PERK.  I KNEW I COULD DO THIS AND I ALSO KNEW.....IT WAS GOING TO BE A HORRIBLE NIGHT. I ALLOWED A DJ TO BOOK A NIGHT WITH THE ASSUMPTION A SURPRISE BIRTHDAY PARTY WAS BEING THROWN. WELP , JUST YESTERDAY I GET A TEXT THAT THE PARTY WAS CANCELLED BECAUSE THE BIRTHDAY BOY WAS DOWN THE SEA SHORE.......ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME ?? WHY WASN'T I TOLD THIS 6 WEEKS AGO????!!!! WE NOW HAVE 2 DJ'S FOR THE WHOLE NIGHT.  NO BANDS = NO PATRONS.

  I PUSHED BACK THE BARTENDER BY TEXTING HER TO COME IN.........7PM TO 7:30PM TO 8PM TO 8:30PM TO 9PM TO FINALLY 9:30PM. IT WAS THE LATEST A BARTENDER HAS EVER COME IN ON A SATURDAY NIGHT IN 21 YEARS. I WAS NOT A HAPPY CAMPER. THE DJ'S WERE POLITE AND I KNEW ONE OF THEM BUT I NEEDED TO GET OUT OF THERE. I SHOULD OF KNOWN TO STAY ON THIS BIRTHDAY PARTY BUT I DIDN'T. YOU THINK I LEARN OVER 21 YEARS.

  I RIDE MY BIKE HOME AND WITHIN 1 HOUR BOTH KIDS AND WHEELS ARRIVE HOME TOO. THE DOG WAS HILARIOUS WITH HER NORMAL WAGGING TAIL , SNEEZING , AND SMILING LIKE ELVIS GREETINGS.

  OH , I PUT THE RABBIT IN HER HUTCH FROM OUR GARDEN. WE DO THIS EVERY NIGHT.  GARAGE GARDEN DURING THE DAY AND HUTCH AT NIGHT FOR SAFETY.

  BY 11:30PM I WAS JONESING FOR A BEER AND BRANDY. I WAS GOING TO DO ONE NIGHTCAP WITH WHEELS. I WAITED FOR ABOUT 20 MINUTES FOR HER TO JOIN ME IN THE TV ROOM. BY THAN.........I FELL ASLEEP. I ALWAYS GET AWOKEN WHEN SHE TAKES THE TV REMOTE. EARLIER I DID WATCH ANOTHER " LUKE CAGE " EPISODE. IT WAS OKAY.

  OFF TO BED WHERE I SLEPT GREAT UNTIL 4:30AM. I GET UP AND BEGIN MY NORMAL MORNING ROUTINES. IT IS NOW 7AM. MAYBE I WILL TRY TO GO BACK TO BED.

  OH......PHILLIES WITH A HUGE WIN. THE BIG THING....THE BULLPEN HELD ON FROM THE 2ND INNING. MIKE SCHMIDT SAID , " THAT WAS PROBABLY THE MOST IMPRESSIVE PLAY I HAVE EVER SEEN IN MY BASEBALL CAREER. "

  WHAT HAPPENED THAT IMPRESSED HALL OF FAMER MICHAEL JACK SCHMIDT ? - IN THE 2ND INNING , PHILLIE STARTER VINCENT VELASQUEZ HAS A MAN ON 3RD BASE IN A TIED GAME. THE BATTER SMOKES A LINE DRIVE RIGHT BACK AT HIM. THE BASEBALL NAILS HIS RIGHT & PITCHING ELBOW. THE BALL DEFLECTS AND ROLLS TOWARDS THE 3RD BASE LINE.  VELASQUEZ DROPS HIS GLOVE , POUNCES ON THE BALL , AND FIRES A THROW TO 1ST BASE..........LEFT HANDED !!!! I MEAN HE FIRED IT.  THE BATTER WAS OUT AND HE PRESERVED THE TIE GAME. PHILLIES GO ON TO WIN 3 -2 .

  OH , JUST ONE MORE  THING , THE WEEDING COMPANY WHO PROMISED TO BE HERE ON SUNDAY SAID THEY GIVE ME A HEADS UP SATURDAY OR SUNDAY ON THE EXACT TIME OF ARRIVAL ON SUNDAY. WELP.......SATURDAY IS GONE AND IT IS NOW SUNDAY MORNING AT 7AM.  GEE.......I WONDER IF THEIR SHOWING UP.

   SUNDAY        7 - 1 - 18

  ASK................AND YOU WILL RECEIVE !!!!!!!! ( 8 TO 10 WEEKS LATER )

  HOW THE HELL CAN I GO TO BED SO DAMN EXHAUSTED AND BARELY KEEP MY EYES OPEN AT 11:30PM..........AND WAKE UP AT 3:30AM ( WHICH IT IS NOW ) ??? IT WAS A FULL DAY AND I SHOULD BE SLEEPING !! DAMN IT !!

  START MORNING BY WALKING WITH WHEELS AND HAVING NICE CONVERSATION. AT FIRST I SAID NO BUT I DID NOT WANT HER TO WALK BY HERSELF AND PLUS........I AM FAT. 

  BACK FROM THE WALK WHEELS PREPS A REALLY GOOD DINNER FOR LATER ON.....CORN , PAN SEARED SPICED UP TUNA STEAKS , STRING BEANS , POTATOES , MEAT LOAF WITH BACON STRIPS , AND EGGPLANT PARM. I HAD A GOOD SUGGESTION AND I THINK THIS WAS THE MAIN REASON FOR THE BEST EGGPLANT I HAD MADE BY WHEELS. WE SKINNED THE EGGPLANT AND THAN I SLICED IT ON OUR DELI SLICER. EGGPLANT WAS PAPER THIN....SO DAMN GOOD. THE KEY TO GOOD EGGPLANT PARM IS THINLY SLICED EGGPLANT. SHE SPENT 2 HOURS PREPPING ALL THESE DINNERS. OH , AND WHEELS MAKES ME A SMOOTHIE. SO PREFER THESE OVER MCDONALDS EGG & SAUSAGE MCMUFFINS.

  EXTREME COMMUNICATION WITH A SIDE JOB. I MEAN I AM OVER THE TOP TEXTING AND EMAILING EVERY MOVE......" LEAVING NOW , " PICTURES OF RECEIPTS , " WE ARE HERE "......AND MORE TEXTS AND EMAILS WITH WORK PERFORMED.  WELL , I WAS PISSED TODAY ESPECIALLY AFTER SO MUCH COMMUNICATION WITH A LANDLORD AND TENANT. THE FEMALE TENANT TEXTED ME , " I WILL NOT BE HOME , BUT MY HUSBAND WILL BE. I'LL TELL HIM YOU'RE COMING AROUND 2PM. "   I HAVE LEARNED IN THE PAST TO OVER COMMUNICATE BECAUSE PROBLEMS ALWAYS ARISE.

  I HEAD TO THE NAIL AND BEGIN MY PREPPING FOR THE NIGHT.  I TEXT A FRIEND , " TELL ME WHEN YOU'RE READY TO BE PICKED UP. " HE TEXTS RIGHT BACK AND I LEAVE THE NAIL AND GET HIM IN HAVERTOWN IN 5 MINUTES.  WE DECIDE TO ACCESS A MAJOR PLUMBING JOB BEFORE GOING TO LOWES FOR MATERIAL. WE STOP BY AT THE JOB SITE AND IT IS 30 MINUTES EARLY......1:30PM.  WE KNOCK AND RING THE DOOR BELL. I GOT A BAD FEELING WHEN NO ONE ANSWERED.

  TO WASTE TIME , WE HEAD TO LOWES TO PURCHASE PRODUCT NEEDED FOR THE JOB. WE RUN INTO A SMALL PROBLEM IN LOCATING WHAT WE NEED BUT GET IT DONE. I RETURNED A BAR BULB THAT I GOT WRONG AND REPLACED IT. I ALSO APPLIED FOR A LOWES CREDIT CARD BUT IT TAKES 7 - 10 DAYS TO GET THE ACTUAL CARD. SO , A LOWES REP SENT ME A PICTURE OF MY CARD VIA EMAIL. HE TOLD ME , " WHEN PURCHASING JUST SIMPLY HAVE THE REGISTER PERSON SCAN THE BAR CODE AND ACCOUNT NUMBER I GAVE YOU HERE. "  WOW.....THAT BE EASY. BUT YOU SEE , THIS IS MY LIFE , AND NOTHING , AND I MEAN NOTHING IS EVER EASY.

  WE GET ALL OUR PRODUCT AND I WANT TO USE MY NEW LOWES " CARD " THAT I HAVE TO SHOW VIA MY CELL PHONE. WELP..........IT DID NOT SCAN.  THE GIRL AT THE REGISTER HAD TO GET A MANAGER. THEY HAD TO PLUG IN EVERY BIT OF INFORMATION ABOUT ME AND THAN IT WENT THROUGH. I MADE SOME JOKES TO THE GIRL AND MADE HER AND MY FRIEND LAUGH. THE PEOPLE IN LINE BEHIND ME WAITING 15 MINUTES.....DID NOT LAUGH AT ALL.

  BACK TO THE SIDE JOB AT 2:05PM. REMEMBER....THE WIFE TOLD THE HUSBAND WE BE COMING AT 2PM ( ISH ). WELL , WE BANGED ON THE DOOR AND RANG THE DOOR BELL AND WAVED TO THEIR SURVEILLANCE CAMERA. I KNEW THE GUY WAS HOME AND WAS PROBABLY SLEEPING OR LAZY. I WAS PISSED. I BEGAN TEXTING BOTH THE TENANT AND LAND LORD. I TRIED CALLING THE GIRL BUT OF COURSE NO ANSWER. 30 MINUTES LATER I DROP MY FRIEND BACK HOME AND I WENT TO THE NAIL AGAIN. I WAS SO FRIGGIN' PISSED.

  BOTH LANDLORD AND TENANT RESPOND. THE LANDLORD SAYS THE TENANTS ARE NEVER LIKE THIS AND THE TENANT SAYS HER HUSBAND IS DEFINITELY HOME. I NEVER RESPONDED. I WILL TOMORROW WHEN I CALM DOWN.

  I GET INVOLVED IN FIXING A 4 FOOT FLO LIGHT AT THE NAIL AND MY CELL GOES OFF. IT IS WHEELS AND SHE WROTE , " YOU'RE NOT GOING TO BELIEVE IT BUT THE WEEDING GUYS ARE HERE. "

  IN 30 SECONDS I LEAVE THE NAIL AND HEAD HOME.  I PULL UP THE DRIVEWAY AND THERE ARE 4 MEXICAN GUYS WEEDING OUR JUMANJI GARDEN.  HERE'S THE NEXT 3 HOURS:

  - I ASKED FOR A HEADS UP EMAIL OR TEXT OR PHONE CALL ON WHEN THE LANDSCAPERS WERE COMING. OF COURSE , I WAS NOT EXPECTING ONE BUT MAN IT WOULD OF BEEN NICE BECAUSE I HAD SOME PREPPING TO DO. SO NOW WE SCRAMBLE.

  - WHEELS , MY YOUNGEST , AND ME GET ALL KINDS OF TOOLS AND BUCKETS. THEY REMOVE ALL SEA SHELLS , BIRD FEEDERS , METAL ARTWORK , AND DRIVEWAY LIGHTS IN ALL OUR FRONT GARDENS WHILE I BEGIN TO HEDGE CUT ALL BUSHES THAT NEEDED IT.....WHICH WAS ALL OF THEM.

  - I USE MY YOUNGEST AS A TRANSLATOR FOR SPANISH.

  - WHEELS PUTS OUT A BIG PITCHER OF ICE WATER WITH GLASSES WHILE I GET A HOSE FOR THEM. IT IS 105 DEGREES AND THESE GUYS ARE BULL GRUNT AWESOME WORKERS.

  - USING A SAWZ SALL I CUT WEEDS THAT BECAME TREES. I AM NOT FABRICATING. I BELIEVE THEY ARE CALLED MULBERRY BUSHES. A SMALL 1 FOOT WEED CAN BECOME A 10 FEET TREE IN WEEKS. I CUT AT LEAST 4 DOWN ALONG WITH OTHER EXTENDING BRANCHES. ONE TREE WAS ABOVE OUR ELECTRICAL WIRES THAT FEED THE HOUSE. THE 8 WEEK DELAY FROM OUR STARTING SCHEDULE REALLY MADE THIS JOB 10 TIMES HARDER. IT WAS PROBABLY CLOSER TO 10 WEEKS FROM THE INITIAL DATE WE SCHEDULED.

  - AFTER A SOLID HOUR I RUN OUT OF SPEED. I TAKE A BREAK AND GO OUT A 2ND TIME BUT I ONLY LAST ABOUT 15 MINUTES.

  - THERE WERE 4 GUYS AND THEY WEEDED FOR 3 SOLID HOURS. ONE GUY IN A YELLOW SHIRT I THOUGHT FOR SURE WOULD HAVE A STROKE.

 - I INSTRUCTED THEM IN SPANISH AND THEY FOLLOWED IT FOR THE MOST PART.  WHEN ALL SAID AND DONE OUR WEEDS , BRANCHES , AND HEDGE CUTTINGS FILLED 2 DUMP TRUCKS. I FIGURE IT HAD TO BE 25 TRASHCANS OR 50 BAGS. IT WAS A MONUMENTAL TASK AND THESE WORKERS BUSTED BALLS.

  - THEY ALSO DID OUR EDGES OF THE SIDEWALKS AND PATHWAYS ALONG WITH THE WEEDS BETWEEN EACH CEMENT PAD AND THAN LEAF BLEW OUR BACK PATIO TO OUR FRONT DRIVEWAY AND ALONG THE STREET. THEY ALSO WEEDED OUT THE DRIVEWAY PLANTS WHICH ARE ALWAYS ANNOYING.

  - I TOOK SOME PICTURES OF THE WEEDING PROCESS AND POSTED IT ON FACEBOOK. " WOW " WAS WRITTEN MANY TIMES BY FRIENDS AND FAMILY. I WISH I HAD A BEFORE PICTURE BECAUSE THE WEEDS WERE OVER 6 FEET HIGH.

  - I ASK MY ELDEST , WHO HAPPEN TO COME HOME AFTER THE WORK , WHAT WOULD YOU TIP THESE WORKERS ? I ALSO ASKED MY YOUNGEST , WHO WAS MY TRANSLATOR , THE SAME QUESTION AND WHAT SPANISH WORD MEANS " TIP ? ".  I ASKED WHEELS TOO. THE CONSENSUS OF ANSWERS RANGED FROM $50 TO $100 PER MAN.

  AS THE WORKERS WERE RAKING AND GETTING READY TO LEAVE WE LOADED UP IN BATHING SUITS AND HEADED TO OUR SWIM CLUB. I GOT CASH FOR A TIP AND WHEELS DROVE. I WANTED TO SIT IN THE BACK SEAT DRIVER SIDE SO I COULD JUST REACH OUT THE WINDOW AND HAND THEM CASH.  WHEELS PULLS TO THE BOTTOM OF THE DRIVEWAY AND IN SPANISH I ASK THE HEAD WORKER TO COME OVER. I , OF COURSE , ALREADY HAD THE WINDOW DOWN , BUT WHEELS ROLLS IT UP VIA THE FRONT SEAT BUTTONS THINKING SHE IS ROLLING IT DOWN. SO , I AM HANDING CASH TO THIS GUY WITH ONE ARM HANGING OUT AS THE WINDOW IS GOING UP. HE HAD TO THINK I AM A "MUY LOCA GRINGO ".  I GIVE THE GUY THE TIP AND SAY " GRACIOUS ". HE RESPONDS " THANK YOU ". WAIT , COULD HE SPEAK ENGLISH THE WHOLE TIME ?

  COMPLIMENTS TO RICKS LAWN & LANDSCAPING. I BIT MY TONGUE FOR OVER 10 WEEKS AND ALWAYS RESPONDED OVER THE TOP NICELY WHEN EACH WEEK THEY EMAIL ME SAYING THEY HAD NO IDEA WHEN WE WILL BE NEXT.

  NEXT IS MULCHING....UGH.

  SOME VERY GOOD WORLD CUP SOCCER MATCHES. THEY ARE IN THE ROUND OF 16. AS AN AMERICAN , I AM NOT A FAN OF RUSSIA , BUT I ALWAYS HAVE ONE MOTTO WHEN WATCHING THESE GAMES......" I LIKE WHEN THE HOME TEAM WINS. " I WAS LEANING TOWARDS RUSSIA TO WIN OVER SPAIN. NOT BY MUCH BUT LEANING. WELL , SPAIN OUT PLAYED THEM THE WHOLE GAME. AT ONE POINT THEY HAD 500 MORE PASSES THAN RUSSIAN AND CONTROLLED THE BALL OVER 75% OF THE TIME. THAT IT DOMINATING.  WELL RUSSIA HAD THE GAME PLAN , " PLAY SUPER CONSERVATIVE DEFENSE AND COUNTER ATTACK WHEN POSSIBLE. " IT WORKED TO A SHOOT-OUT WHERE THE RUSSIANS WON IN PENALTY KICKS. THE STADIUM WENT NUTS.

  SPEAKING OF NUTS. WHILE WAITING FOR THE LANDSCAPERS TO FINISH WE ARE WATCHING THE PHILLIES IN EXTRA INNINGS.  IN THE BOTTOM OF THE 13TH INNING ANDREW KNAPP SLAMS A WALK-OFF HOME RUN TO WIN THE GAME.  WHAT WAS NUTS WAS HIM BEING INTERVIEWED AFTER THE GAME. HE TOLD HIS DAD ," I'M SUPPOSE TO START TODAY. " SO HIS DAD ATTENDED THE GAME. UNFORTUNATELY , KNAPP DID NOT START SO HE TOLD HIS DAD. THE FATHER RESPONDED , " WELL , JUST WIN THE GAME WITH A HOME RUN THAN. "

  LEBRON JAMES - I THOUGHT HE STAY IN CLEVELAND BUT THAN I HEARD HE OWNED 3 HOMES IN LOS ANGELOS. JAMES SIGNS A 4 YEARS DEAL FOR 153.3 MILLION DOLLARS. OH.....MY....GOD. THE CLEVELAND FANS WILL BURNING HIS JERSEYS AGAIN. SIXERS AND COLD PHILLY WEATHER NEVER HAD A CHANCE.

  OFF TO THE SWIM CLUB. WE ARE ACTUALLY COUNTING HOW MANY TIMES WE GO THIS SUMMER TO SEE IF IT IS WORTH IT. ALL 4 OF US GO AND IT WAS WONDERFUL. WE PLAYED WATER BASKETBALL AND A GAME OF " AROUND THE WORLD " IN WHICH WHEELS WON AND I CAME IN LAST. I PLAYED " SHARK " WITH MY KIDS WHILE WHEELS SUNNED. IT WAS THE PERFECT TIME TO GO....RIGHT AROUND 6:30PM. EVERYONE HEADED HOME FOR DINNER AND WE BASICALLY HAD THE POOL TO OURSELVES. I PLAYED AND JOKED WITH MY KIDS WHICH WAS AWESOME. I HAD THEM LAY ON THEIR BACKS AND FLOAT WHILE I PULLED THEM AROUND THE POOL. IMAGINE HOW RELAXING THAT IS ? SO THAN I HAD MY YOUNGEST PULL ME AROUND THE POOL WHILE I FLOATED ON MY BACK. IT WAS GIGGLE TIME WITH THIS KID. I ALSO SWAM LAPS AND RESISTANCE WALKED IN THE POOL TOO.

  BACK HOME WE ALL SIT FOR A WONDERFUL DINNER. WE PLAYED MUSIC AND JUST HAD REALLY NICE CONVERSATION. THE PUP SAT WITH US TOO. SOMETIMES SHE GETS SOME LEFTOVERS.

  CRAIGSLIST STRIKES AGAIN. I TALK TO A REALLY NICE LADY IN W.C.  HER KIDS GRADUATED FROM THE SAME UNIVERSITY THAT OUR ELDEST IS GOING TOO. THEY ARE OPENING UP A NEW BREAKFAST PLACE AND WANT TO UPDATE THEIR BARSTOOLS. THESE STOOLS JUST HAPPEN TO MATCH OURS AT THE NAIL. I'VE BEEN LOOKING FOR 1 YEAR FOR A GOOD DEAL SINCE THESE STOOLS CAN BE $60 A CHAIR. THEY WANTED $25 A STOOL AND THEY HAD 10 OF THEM. I OFFERED $50 FOR 4 AND THEY AGREED. SINCE THEY LIVE IN W.C. MY ELDEST PICKED THEM UP ON THE WAY TO HER APARTMENT. SHE TEXTED ME WHEN THE TRANSACTION WAS DONE , " STOOLS ARE IN GREAT CONDITION AND THEIR HOUSE IS HUGE !! " I MAY MAKE AN OFFER FOR THE OTHER 6.

  WHEELS AND I SETTLE IN AND WATCH AN EPISODE OF " HOMELAND ". IT WAS OKAY AND IT FELT A LITTLE LONG. I BREAK MY MEAL PLAN AND HAVE ONE GLASS OF WINE , 2 BEERS , AND.....ONE BRANDY. I HAD A SMALL SUGAR HEADACHE THE NEXT MORNING ON JUST ONE BRANDY.  I THINK THIS IS A GOOD THING TO KEEP WEANING MYSELF OFF THIS SUGARY PRODUCT.

  WELP , IT'S 6:30AM.......MILES TRY TO GET BACK TO SLEEP.

  I AM IN A 3RD FLOOR APARTMENT BUILDING. THE UNIT IS OLD AND IT IS BASICALLY ONE ROOM WITH A BED. I REALLY DO NOT KNOW MY NEIGHBORS BUT IT SEEMS TO HAVE YOUNG ADULTS HERE. I WOULD SAY AGE WOULD RANGE FROM 18 - 22.  I AM STRAIGHTENING MY ROOM AND ALL OF A SUDDEN THE SPRINKLER SYSTEM GOES OFF. THE WATER STREAMING OUT IS NOT FAST BUT KINDA LIKE A HARD MIST. STILL.....IT IS AFFECTING MY ROOM BY WETTING MY BED , CHAIR , TV , AND MORE. I FRANTICALLY SEARCH MY APARTMENT FOR A SHUT-OFF VALVE. I CAN NOT FIND IT SO I DETERMINE I HAVE TO GO TO THE BOILER ROOM OF THIS OLD APARTMENT BUILDING AND FIND IT. I RUN OUT AND INTO THE HALLWAY. I HEAR OTHER TENANTS SCREAMING BECAUSE THEIR ROOMS ARE BEING RAINED ON.  I RACE DOWN THE STEPS TO THE BASEMENT. A PERSON HANDS ME A FLASH LIGHT AS I RUN BY HIM.  ROOM BY ROOM I LOOK AND LISTEN FOR A SUPPRESSION SYSTEM THAT DIRECTLY AFFECT THE SPRINKLERS.  I GET TO THE LAST ROOM AND IT IS DARK. I AM CARRYING THE FLASH LIGHT LIKE COPS DO WITH A GUN. I SEE A LARGE BACK FLOW AIR TANK BUT CAN NOT FIND A TURN OFF OR RELEASE SWITCH. I HEAR WATER MOVING AND NOTICE A SWING VALVE. I TURN IT AND I HEAR THE WATER STARTING TO COME TO A STOP. THE NEXT THING I HEAR ABOVE ME IS LOUD CHEERING THROUGHOUT THE BUILDING.

  CONTINUED - I SLOWLY WALK BACK UP THE 3 FLIGHTS OF STEPS TO GET BACK TO MY ROOM. A YOUNG ASIAN GIRL WITH BLACK HAIR HUGS AND KISSES ME. SHE SAYS , " THANK YOU SO MUCH ".  NEXT , A BEAUTIFUL YOUNG BLONDE GIRL WHO LOOKS JUST LIKE THE ACTRESS ON THE TV SHOW " I-CARLY " HUGS AND KISSES ME. SHE SAYS , " YOU'RE AMAZING. THANK YOU !! "  I GET TO MY HALLWAY AND GO IN THE WRONG ROOM. I SEE SOME OLD 8TH GRADE FRIENDS PLAYING CARDS. THEY GIVE ME THE COLD SHOULDER AND I CERTAINLY KNOW I AM IN THE WRONG ROOM. JUST AFTER I LEAVE THEY PULL A CURTAIN CLOSED TO TELL ME THEY WANT PRIVACY AND ME OUT OF THERE.  I WALK TOWARDS MY ROOM AND REALIZE I HAVE TO GIVE THE FLASHLIGHT BACK. I GO DOWN ONE FLOOR AND A YOUNG ASIAN GUY HUGS ME. HE SAYS , " YOU KNOW YOU CAN HAVE THIS ANY TIME NOW. " HE POINTS TO HIS BUTT AS I AM FOLLOWING HIM DOWN THE STAIRWELL.  I GIVE THE FLASH LIGHT TO THE PERSON ON THE 2ND FLOOR WHO SEES ME COMING. THE YOUNG HOT BLONDE FROM ( I-CARLY ) SCAMPERS DOWN THE FLIGHT IN A G-STRING AND NIGHTIE ON. SHE SAYS , " OH MY GOD , I HAVE TO TAKE A SHOWER. SHE RUNS DOWN THE HALLWAY AND ENTERS THE BATHROOMS THERE....................dream ends. ( MAN , SHE COULDN'T ASK ME TO SHOWER WITH HER ?)

  MONDAY     7 - 2 - 18

 STILL SHAKING MY HEAD ON HOW MUCH WEEDING WAS DONE YESTERDAY......BUT.

 START MY MORNING AT FRIGGIN' 3:30AM. HOW THE HELL CAN I KEEP DOING THIS ?

  GET EVERYTHING DONE BY 6:30AM AND GO BACK TO SLEEP. I DO NAP UNTIL 8:30AM AND HAVE A COOL DREAM WHICH I  WROTE IN YESTERDAY'S BLOG.

  KEEP THE OUTSIDE CLEANING UP AND MOVEMENT GOING :

  - I WALK AROUND OUR HOUSE AND WEED MORE. 3 TRASHCANS LATER I WAS DONE.

  - PUT THE RABBIT FORM THE HUTCH TO THE GARAGE GARDEN. SO GLAD OUR ELDEST GOT A RABBIT.

  - MOVE STONES IN OUR FRONT GARDEN TO LOOK MORE SYMMETRICAL WITH THE LANDSCAPE. I HAVE NOT SEEN THEM IN 5 YEARS.

  - REMOVE MORE IVY FROM OUR FRONT TREE. IVY REALLY STRANGLES ALL LIVING PLANTS.

  - REMOVE ANOTHER WEED AND SMALL TREE THAT CLIMBS OUR TELEPHONE POLE NEAR OUR DRIVEWAY GARDEN.

  - BROKEN LAWN MOWER. I SPEND A SOLID HOUR TRYING TO FIX. IT WILL NOT START AND A CABLE BROKE. I AM USING A VICE GRIP TO HOLD IT IN PLACE.  I HAVE MY DOG WITH ME BUT AFTER 15 MINUTES SHE SIGNALS ME WITH A PAW MIDDLE FINGER AND SAYS LET ME THE HELL INSIDE.

  - REMOVE ALL DRIVEWAY LIGHTS AND STICK THEM IN THE GROUND OR FACE UP IN A BUCKET TO ALLOW THE SUN TO CHARGE THEM. I AM SWEATING LIKE THE BEJESUS.

  - REPAIRED A STREET WOOD BORDER.

  BACK INSIDE FOR A WONDERFUL CAESAR SALAD WITH CHICKEN SALAD ADDED. OH MY GOD IT IS SO GOOD. SO WOULD NOT RATHER HAVE PIZZA. I HAVE SOME WATER AND SODA WATER TO WATCH " LUKE CAGE " WHICH IS OKAY.

  YOUNGEST GETS DRIVEN TO A FRIEND'S HOUSE BY WHEELS FOR A VACATION.

  I HEAD TO THE NAIL ON MY MOTORCYCLE. I HAVE A NEW BARTENDER WHO IS ADORABLE. SHE IS MY ELDEST FRIEND AND I REALLY ENJOY WORKING WITH HER. I WORK AND SHOW HER HOW TO DO A FULL OPEN AND CLOSE.

  TONIGHT I COMBINED OPEN BLUES AND ANGEL BLUE BAND WITH TOURING BANDS TO GET HEADS IN THE DOOR. FOR A MONDAY NIGHT TO HAVE CLOSE TO 30 PEOPLE HERE WAS NICE EXCEPT FOR ONE THING THAT I DID NOT NOTICE UNTIL ABOUT 2 HOURS INTO THE SHOW................NO ONE DRANK ALCOHOL. NONE OF THE 3 BAND MEMBERS NOR PROMOTERS AND NOT MUCH OF THE BLUES PEOPLE DRANK AT ALL.

  I ASK A TOURING BAND MEMBER IF HE DRANK. HE SHOWS ME A TATTOOED  " X " ON HIS ARM AND SAYS , " NO MAN I'M IN FOR LIFE ". I HAD NO IDEA WHAT THAT MEANT.

  WE HAD 30 PEOPLE HERE AND 3 WERE DRINKING......I WAS ONE OF THE 3.  I FELT MORE BAD FOR OUR BARTENDER WHO WAS BUBBLY AND FUN ALL NIGHT. I GAVE HER AN EXTRA PAYOUT.

  WE DO A FULL CLOSE AND I HEAD HOME. THE BARTENDER BRINGS SOME STUFF HOME FOR ME WHICH I COULDN'T ON MY MOTORCYCLE.

  IT IS AFTER 1:15AM AND I WIND DOWN THE NIGHT WITH A LIBATION AND AN EPISODE OF " LUKE CAGE " WHICH WAS OKAY.

  TUESDAY      7- 3 - 18

  YEP.........CAN'T EVEN ENJOY ONE FRIGGIN' NIGHT WITHOUT SOMETHING HAPPENING.

  UP EARLY AS USUAL.....BLOWS.

  WHEELS AND I HEAD TO THE SWIM CLUB. THE WATER IS GLORIOUS AND IN 15 MINUTES THUNDER KICKED US OUT. NO FORECASTERS SAW THIS COMING.

  WHEELS STAYS AND I DRIVE HOME LIKE A MANIAC. TO SAY I HAD TO POOP WOULD BE AN UNDERSTATEMENT.  I DRIVE UP TO MY BACK DOOR , PARK THE CAR SIDEWAYS , THROW ALL CLOTHES OFF , AND DIVE TOWARDS THE TOILET. IT WAS LIKE A SCENE FROM " DUMB & DUMBER ".......WITHOUT THE EX-LAX.

  CHECK MY EMAILS AND DECIDE NOT TO WORK FOR A WOMEN WHO TWICE MISSED MY TEXTS AND CALLS ON SUNDAY. AS I STATED 2 DAYS AGO ON THIS BLOG WE STOPPED TWICE AT THE HOME AND NO ANSWER. I WAS FURIOUS ESPECIALLY AFTER I CONFIRMED WITH THE TENANT TO BE THERE. AGAIN SHE CONFIRMED , " THE HUSBAND WILL BE THERE WAITING. "  HE WAS NOT. THERE IS ABSOLUTELY NO EXCUSE TO NOT ANSWER THE DOOR WHEN WARNED 3 TIMES VIA PHONE CALLS AND TEXTING.

  BACK TO THE SWIM CLUB TO CHILL AGAIN. THE WATER IS BLISSFUL.  I SWAM LAPS AND POWER WALKED IN THE WATER. I ALSO FELT SO DAMN FAT WITH ALL THE YOUNG GIRLS AND LIFE GUARDS IN BIKINIS. SMOKING HOT AND I AM UGLY AS SIN.

  HEAD HOME AND JUST CHILL FOR A LITTLE BIT. WE WATCH SOME REALLY GOOD WORLD CUP SOCCER MATCHES.

  FRIENDS PICK US UP AND WE HEAD TO THE PHILLIES GAME. 10 MINUTES FROM THE STADIUM AND IT DOWN POURS.

  TREATED LIKE ROYALTY WITH PRIVATE PARKING , WALK UNDERNEATH STADIUM TO AVOID RAIN , SEE ORIOLE PITCHERS PRACTICING , PRIVATE DINNER , SUITE , BOOZE , AND SNACKS.....GOOD GOD I WOULD LOVE TO LIVE LIKE THIS.

  MET A GUY TONIGHT WHO HAD A BACHELOR PARTY AT THE NAIL......30 YEARS AGO.

  PHILLIES WIN A GOOD FUN GAME.  I HAD A GREAT TIME CHILLING WITH SOME OLD FRIENDS AND WHEELS. NOT WORRYING ABOUT DRIVING HOME WAS NICE TOO.

  GOT TO MEET SCOTT KINGERY'S DAD.  FRANCO THE 3RD BASEMAN , WHO IS AFRICAN AMERICAN, MADE A REMARKABLE DEFENSIVE PLAY IN THE 8TH INNING TO PRESERVE THE WIN. I TURN TO MR. KINGERY AND SAY , " MAN , YOUR SON IS GOOD. "

  ** IF NOT A PHILLIES FAN , SCOTT KINGERY IS WHITE AND ABOUT 5 FEET TALL AND PLAYS SHORT STOP **

  BACK HOME I BASICALLY PASS OUT. OFF TO BED AND ACTUALLY SLEPT TO 8AM.

  OH , JUST ONE MORE THING.  THE LIGHTNING STORM BLEW OUT A TRANSFORMER FOR THE NAIL BACK LOT GATE. 3 CARS GOT STUCK. OF COURSE , NO ANSWER BY THE OWNER WHEN I CALLED AT 9:44PM. I ALWAYS ANSWER MY CELL PHONE 100%. HE DID CONTACT ME THE NEXT MORNING THOUGH WHICH WAS COOL AND THE GATE IS FIXED. NOW I HAVE TO GET THE 3 CARS TO THE OWNERS..........WELL ONE IS OURS.

   WEDNESDAY         7 - 4 - 18

  HAPPY 4TH OF JULY , HAPPY INDEPENDENCE DAY , AND HAPPY HEAT.  IT WAS HOT BUT TODAY WENT OFF WITHOUT A HITCH.  WELL.........NOT TOTALLY BECAUSE I HAD TO GET 3 CARS OUT FROM BEHIND THE NAIL.

  GET A TEXT AT 9AM THAT THE GATE IS REPAIRED.  LIGHTNING AGAIN HAD BLEW A TRANSFORMER. NOW I MUST GET MY ELDEST JEEP OUT OF THERE ALONG WITH 2 OTHERS. I OFFER TO GET THE KEYS AT A PLACE OF WORK FOR ONE GUY. I DRIVE THERE EARLY MORNING AND RETRIEVE HIS KEYS.  THE OTHER GUY IS NOT ANSWERING MY TEXTS OR CALLS WHICH HINDERS THE SITUATION BECAUSE OUR STREETS ARE NOW CLOSED. THE JULY 4TH PARADE IS STARTING. SO , I TAKE A BREAK.

  WHEELS AND I WALK AROUND THE AREA AND SAY HELLO TO MANY FRIENDS. FREE BEER , DRINKS , HOT DOGS , PRETZELS , JAGER , AND MORE.  THE LARGE PARADE CIRCLES OUR BLOCK TWICE. I FIGURE AT LEAST 10,000 PEOPLE ARE HERE......PROBABLY WAY MORE. WE WALK DOWN TO THE NEW PARK FOR MORE ACTIVITIES.  IT WAS VERY COOL THAT THIS TOWNSHIP DOES THIS EVERY YEAR. IT REALLY IS A BIG PRODUCTION. MUSIC , MARCHING BANDS , OLD VEHICLES , FIRE ENGINES , POLICE CARS , AND MORE MARCH OUR STREETS. IT WAS SOMETHING TO SEE.

  BACK HOME WHEELS , MYSELF , AND OUR ELDEST GO TO BROOMALL TO PICK UP ONE OF THE DRIVERS STUCK BEHIND THE NAIL. HE IS VERY COOL AND A MUSICIAN.  ALL OF US HEAD TO THE NAIL.

  AT THE NAIL THE GATE WORKS AND WE GET OUT. I DRIVE A FRIEND'S CAR TO HIS WORK WHILE WHEELS FOLLOWS ME. THE MUSICIAN TAKES HIS CAR AND OUR DAUGHTER GETS HER'S. ALL 4 OF US ARE OUT.  WHEELS FOLLOWS ME TO THE RESTAURANT " THE GOAT'S BEARDS " AND I DROP THE KEYS OFF TO A SUPER HOT BLONDE GREETER.  SHE GIVES THEM TO HIM AND I TEXT , " I THINK THE HOT BLONDE GREETER WANTS ME. " HE RESPONDS , " LOL......I'LL PUT IN A GOOD WORD. "

  BACK HOME WHEELS HEADS TO AN ANNUAL PARTY THROWN BY OLD FRIENDS. I TAKE A NAP SINCE I GOT UP AT 3:30AM. I AM TRYING TO AVOID SO MUCH FREE BEER AND FOOD. IT IS TOUGH.

  ELDEST FRIENDS GO IN AND OUT ALL DAY.  IT WAS GOOD TO SEE THEM. WHEELS RETURNS AND WE CHILL FOR A LITTLE BIT. WE WATCH THE PHILLIES WIN AGAIN. THEY HAVE THE BEST HOME RECORD IN THE NATIONAL LEAGUE AND NOLA IS 8 - 0 AT HOME.  THE PHILLIES ARE ALSO 10 GAMES ABOVE .500 AND 1 1/2 GAMES OUT OF 1ST PLACE. THEY ARE QUIETLY STICKING AROUND AND STAYING IN THE HUNT FOR A PLAYOFF RUN.

  WE ARE REALLY TRYING TO USE THE SWIM CLUB THIS SEASON. AGAIN , WE TAKE A 2 MINUTE RIDE TO THE  POOL. THE WATER IS AWESOME AND WE BRING A SMALL RADIO TO LISTEN TO THE PHILLIES. I WORK-OUT BY SWIMMING LAPS AND WALKING IN THE WATER. WE ALSO MAKE PLANS FOR OUR 30TH ANNIVERSARY. WHEELS AND I DECIDE TO GO TO NEW YORK FOR SIGHT SEEING AND THEATRE. I AM LOOKING FORWARD TO IT.

  BACK HOME AGAIN AND WHEELS MAKES A VERY GOOD DINNER OF SALMON SMOTHERED IN A LEMON SEASONING , RICE , AND CORN ON THE COB. WE WERE GIVEN A TON OF LEMONS AND LIMES FROM THE PHILLIES GAME BECAUSE THE BARTENDER SAID THEY JUST THROW THEM AWAY. SO WHEELS USED ABOUT 20 SLICED LEMONS FOR THE SALMON DISH. IT CAME OUT VERY GOOD.

   WE WATCH A MOVIE CALLED " AMERICAN MADE " WITH TOM CRUISE. IT IS A REMARKABLE TRUE STORY OF DRUG SMUGGLING. PABLO ESCOBAR AND MORE DRUG KING PINS ALONG WITH F.B.I. & C.I.A. ALL HAVE A PART IN THIS GUY'S LIFE. IT REALLY IS ENTERTAINING AND EVEN MORE MIND BLOWING THIS GUY WENT THROUGH IT.

  OFF TO BED BY 11:30PM. 2 GOOD DREAMS I FORGOT ALREADY......DAMN IT. I REALLY HAVE TO COME UP WITH A WAY TO REMEMBER THESE PRETTY COOL DREAMS.

   THURSDAY       7 - 4 - 18

  AT OUR NEW PARK I AM IN LINE FOR FREE HOT DOGS , PRETZELS , SODA , AND WATER. THE LINE IS SHORT AND I GET 2 DOGS THINKING WHEELS WOULD WANT ONE. SHE DID NOT. A POLICE OFFICER STANDS NEXT TO ME AND HAS 2 PRETZELS. HE LOOKS AT THE SHORT LINE AND SEEMS RELUCTANT TO GET IN IT FOR A HOT DOG......SO I GAVE HIM MINE. I WAS PROUD OF MYSELF NOT HAVING ONE FREE BEER ALL DAY......THAT WAS TOUGH.

  THE HEAT CONTINUES AND I KINDA BURNT MYSELF OUT TODAY.  AFTER BRINGING THE RABBIT FROM UPSTAIRS TO THE OUTSIDE GARDEN I USE THE RIDING MOWER TO CUT THE LAWN. I TRY STARTING 3 LAWN MOWERS AND NOT ONE STARTS WHICH TOTALLY BLOWS. I TEXT AND EMAIL THE GUY WHO FIXED THEM AND OF COURSE.....NO TEXT BACK AND HIS EMAIL ADDRESS BOUNCED BACK.

  I MOVE 200 TOOLS AND 2 SEATS FROM MY VAN TO THE INSIDE OF THE HOUSE. I PREP MY VAN FOR MULCHING BY LINING IT WITH PLASTIC. I DID IT A LITTLE DIFFERENT THIS SEASON AND I HOPE IT WORKS BETTER. THE FREE MULCH THIS YEAR LOOKS REALLY GOOD AGAIN.........DARK AND RICH IN COLOR AND CLEAN.

  LAY DOWN FOR A NAP. I END UP WATCHING A BAD MOVIE ABOUT A LAWYER PLAYED BY DENZEL WASHINGTON. WHY DIDN'T I NAP ?

  I HOSE DOWN OUR HOME'S A/C GRID AND FILTER. I LET THEM DRY IN THE SUN FOR 2 HOURS AND REPLACE THEM.

  LAWNMOWER FIX PART II - I GOT A SUPER NICE SELF-PROPELLING LAWN MOWER OFF CRAIGSLIST. I MEAN I REPLACED A $4 BELT AND IT WORKS AWESOME. I GOT IT FOR FREE. IT IS THE BEST LAWN MOWER I EVER HAD. I REALLY LIKE THIS MACHINE. I TAKE OFF THE LID AND DO SOME TINKERING WITH THE SPARK PLUG , THROTTLE , AND CHOKE. THE MAIN THING WAS FINDING A SMALL VICE GRIP. I LOOKED 2 DAYS AGO AND COULD NOT FIND IT. WELL , SINCE ALL MY TOOLS WERE IN THE KITCHEN I WENT THROUGH THEM ONE BY ONE. I FIND IT AND IT'S THE KEY FOR ME GOING BACK OUTSIDE TO ATTEMPT TO RUN THIS ENGINE.  IN 10 MINUTES , I SOLVED IT AND FINISHED CUTTING THE EDGES OF OUR LAWN. IT'S LITTLE BUT I AM SO DAMN CONTENT.

  I WENT THROUGH WHEELS POCKET BOOKS AND BELLY BAGS ( OR WHATEVER THEY'RE CALLED ). I FIND 3 SMALL BLACK BAGS AND TAKE THEM OUTSIDE TO MY MOTORCYCLE. I SIZE UP THE 3 AND PICK ONE. I MISS MY OLD BIKE BAG SO THIS WILL FILL THAT VOID. I FIGURE OUT HOW TO MOUNT IT TO THE HANDLE BARS AND I LIKE IT. IT IS SMALL BUT I AM ALWAYS NERVOUS CARRYING MY CELL PHONE ON MY PANT'S BELT SO THIS IS A NICE AND SAFER WAY OF DOING IT.

  VACUUMING HOUSE FLIES. I FOUND 2 WINDOWS NOT LOCKED AND CLOSED THEM PROPERLY. I THOUGHT THIS WOULD SOLVE THE ATTACK OF THE FLIES. WELP , IT DIDN'T. EVERY YEAR , AT THIS TIME , I NEED TO VACUUM 5 - 10 FLIES EACH DAY FOR ABOUT 3 TO 4 WEEKS.

  WHEELS MAKES A NICE DINNER OF OMEGA PORK CHOPS , CORN , AND  MUSHROOMS.

  OFF TO THE NAIL ON MY BIKE. IT IS BEAUTIFUL RIDING HERE AND I ENJOY THE SHORT TRIP. I CLEAN OUT THE A/C'S FILTER AND FAIL FIXING A 4 FOOT LIGHT. STANDING ON THE BAR AND GOING UP AND DOWN THE LADDER 15 TIMES WAS HARD ON MY FAT BODY. I CHANGE THE MARQUEE SIGN AND CLEAN SOME BEER BINS OUT. BY 8:30PM , I WAS EMAILING AND TALKING TO BANDS.  WHEN I GOT HERE MUSICIANS WERE COMING INTO PLAY OUR " JUST JAM " NIGHT.

  BY 10PM I HAVE A NICE LITTLE CROWD. I CONTINUE TO 12 MIDNIGHT TO GET MY EMAILS DONE AND BEGIN WRITING MY BLOG FOR TOMORROW. SOMETIME I LIKE DOING IT HERE AND NOT IN THE MORNING. TOMORROW I AM TRYING TO BEAT THE RAIN FOR MULCHING..........I HOPE I CAN. WELL , NOT REALLY , IT'S A PAIN IN THE BALLS BUT WHEN ALL DONE IT LOOKS SO DAMN GOOD.

  AFTER LETTING THEM SOAK FOR 1 DAY I SCRUB & CLEAN 25 GREEN BASKETS.........SO NOT FUN.

  SINCE WHEELS AND I ARE GOING TO NEW YORK NEXT MONTH I HAVE BEEN PUTTING SOME FEELERS OUT. I GOT SOME VERY GOOD SUGGESTIONS BY ONE PATRON HERE TONIGHT. HE WAS A HUGE HELP AS FAR AS OPINIONS OF NAVIGATING NEW YORK AND SIGHT SEEING. HE LIVES IN NEW YORK AND GAVE ME HIS EMAIL. I WILL EMAIL HIM NEXT MONTH.

  SOME NEW REGULARS THAT DO NOT SPEAK ENGLISH VERY WELL ARE SUPER COOL. THEY DRINK , THEY SHOOT POOL , THEY BUY BEERS FOR THE MUSICIANS , AND THEY TIP WELL. WISH I HAD 50 OF THEM. REALLY MAKES THE NIGHT FUN.

  AFTER MIDNIGHT AND I AM COOKING MOZZARELLA STIX ORDERS.  THE NAIL ALWAYS AMAZES ME. IT IS " THE BLACK HOLE ".

  AND ON THE LAST NOTE - "OUT OF SIGHT , OUT OF MIND ". GOT HOME LATE NIGHT. HAD 3 BEERS AND 2 SHOTS OF BRANDY. WAY TOO MUCH EVEN THOUGH I WAS JONESING ALL NIGHT TO WIND DOWN. I WATCHED AN EPISODE OF " LUKE CAGE " AND FELL ASLEEP.  THE NEXT MORNING I PUT THE BRANDY BOTTLE BY WHEELS' BEDROOM DOOR. FROM NOW ON IT WILL BE IN HER ROOM......OUT OF SIGHT.

   FRIDAY      7 - 6 - 18

  BURNT MYSELF OUT TODAY.

  PERFECT WEATHER FOR MULCHING.  OVERCAST , RAIN , AND TEMPS DROPPED. IT WAS TIME TO TAKE ON THE MONUMENTAL TASK OF MULCHING 9 GARDENS. IT WAS DRAINING TO SAY THE LEAST.

  I PREPPED THE VAN YESTERDAY WITH A PLASTIC LINING AND REMOVED ALL TOOLS AND SEATS. I DRIVE TO OUR MULCH LOCATION AND BEGIN LOADING.  6 TIMES I DID THIS......6.........FRIGGIN'......TIMES I FILLED A MINIVAN. WHEELS HELPED ME WITH THE LAST ONE BECAUSE I THINK I POPPED A NUT.

  I TOOK SOME BRIEF PAUSES BECAUSE IT WAS DOWN POURING AND I WAS TIRED. THE RAIN ALSO CAUSED WATER IN OUR BASEMENT BECAUSE OUR DAMN DRAIN WAS CLOGGED AGAIN. I REALLY WAS NOT EXCEPTING SO MUCH RAIN.

  I OPENED THE NAIL LATE BECAUSE I HAD TO GO TO THE SWIM CLUB.  WHEELS AND I GO AND IT IS BLISS. I MADE A NEW RULE....." WHENEVER ASKED TO GO TO THE SWIM CLUB , ALWAYS SAY YES. "  WE ORDER A PIZZA FROM THERE.

  BACK HOME WE CHANGE , MAIL SOME LETTERS , AND GET THE PIZZA. I AM RAVENOUS WITH HUNGER.

  OFF TO THE NAIL TO PREP FOR THE NIGHT. I WAS NOT EXPECTING A GOOD NIGHT AND I WAS WRONG.  KISSING THE KLEPTO PACKED THE HOUSE. WATCHING SO MANY GIRLS IN A RATED PG MOSH PIT WAS VERY COOL. TONIGHT WAS A REALLY FUN NIGHT , BUT I HAD ONE DILEMMA.

  PHILLIES SCORE 2 TOUCHDOWNS AND A FIELD GOAL TO BEAT PITTSBURGH STEELERS 17 - 4.

  HEAD HOME EXHAUSTED. I HAVE 2 BEERS AND NO BRANDY. MY " HIDE " THE BRANDY WORKED.

  OFF TO BED BY 1:30AM. I WILL BE AT THE NAIL BY 7:30AM TOMORROW. THAT STORY WILL BE TOLD TOMORROW.

  DILEMMA - A CUTE , NICE BODIED , HIPPIE BLONDE CHICK IS HAVING A BLAST PARTYING AND DANCING. SHE WAS SUPER CUTE AND HAD SUPER SHORT CUT UP BLUE JEANS ON. I MEAN REALLY SHORT JEANS.  THAN I NOTICED SOMETHING THAT I FELT I SHOULD TELL HER GIRLFRIEND OR EVEN THE BOYFRIEND ,BUT I DIDN'T ...............................HER TAMPON STRING WAS HANGING OUT. AT FIRST , I THOUGHT IT WAS A YOYO STRING BECAUSE IT WAS SO LONG.

   SATURDAY      7 - 7 - 18

  ROAD TRIP.............THERE GOES EATING AND DRINKING WISELY.

  AT THE NAIL AT 7:30AM. LET MY LONG DAY AND NIGHT BEGIN.

  - I PREP THE BAR FOR 2 HOURS. TRY FIXING A LIGHT FOR THE 3RD TIME AND FAIL.

  - BACK HOME I SHOWER AND PACK.

  - FAMILY MEMBER PICKS WHEELS AND I UP.  2 OTHER FAMILY MEMBERS JOIN US FOR A TREK.

  - ABOUT HALF WAY WE STOP AT A REST / FOOD AREA. I GET OUT AND MY DOOR HITS A CAR. IT DOES MAKE A SMALL MARK. I ASK MY FAMILY MEMBER TO MOVE HIS CAR. WE EAT AND GET BACK ON THE ROAD.

  - 5 HOUR TOTAL ROAD TRIP AND WE ARRIVE AT OUR HOTEL CALLED " THE DISTRIKT ".  WE GET VALET , UNLOAD , AND CHECK IN 3 ROOMS. GOING UP THE ELEVATOR A COUPLE COMPLAINS THEY PAID $300 A NIGHT FOR A CLOSET SIZED ROOM. WE PAID HALF AND ARE SATISFIED WITH OURS.

  - UBER A RIDE TO THE BASEBALL STADIUM. WHEELS THINKS OUR DRIVER WAS A GIRL , THE REST OF US SAID HE WAS A GUY.  LET THE DRINKING BEGIN.

  - WE MEET UP WITH 11 MORE COUSINS TO MAKE OUR GROUP 16 TOTAL.  THE FOOD , BEER , AND FUN BEGINS.

  - OH , LET ME TELL YOU THIS STADIUM IS BEAUTIFUL AND HAS SOME OF THE HOTTEST GIRLS I EVER SEEN.

  - THE GAME GOES WAY TOO FAST AND MORE THAN HALF THE CROWD ARE PHILLY FANS.  IT IS A PICTURE PERFECT DAY AND OUR SEATS ARE IN THE SHADE. I POST SOME PICS ON FACEBOOK FOR FAMILY TO SEE.

  - PHILLIES ARE DOWN 2 - 0 AND MAKE A NICE COME BACK TO WIN AND HANG ON BY A 3 - 2 MARGIN. THE PHILLY FANS HERE REALLY TOOK OVER THIS STADIUM. I NEVER BEEN TO AN AWAY GAME FOR THE PHILLIES. IT WAS PRETTY COOL.

  - HEAD OUT AND TAIL GATE WITH EVERYONE FOR ANOTHER 2 HOURS. WE ARE UNDER A BRIDGE AND THE JOKES AND STORIES BEGIN AGAIN. THIS IS A BLAST OF A GOOD TIME.

  - WE WALK TO THE MAIN DISTRICT AND OVER THE ROBERTO CLEMENTE BRIDGE. HUNDREDS OF PAD LOCKS ARE CONNECTED TO THE FENCING THE WHOLE WAY ACROSS. APPARENTLY IT IS FOR GOOD LUCK.

  - WE STOP AT A COUSIN'S HOTEL AND A WEDDING IS GOING ON. I POP MY HEAD IN THERE AND A SMOKING HOT GIRL SAYS , " ARE YOU TRYING TO CRASH THE WEDDING ? " OH , THE THINGS I WOULDA DONE TO HER FOR 30 SECONDS. THE HOTEL IS MAGNIFICENT.

  - WE WALK THE MAIN DISTRICT AREA AND IT IS PACKED WITH PEOPLE , BARS , AND RESTAURANTS.

  - WE ARRIVE AT ONE RESTAURANT AND IT IS PACKED. WE WAIT 10 MINUTES AND GET A PHENOMENAL TABLE OUTSIDE ON THE FRONT EDGE. IT IS PERFECT. IT OVERLOOKS THE ENTIRE SQUARE JUST CHOCKED WITH PEOPLE , VENDERS , LIGHTS , AND MORE. A COUSIN SUGGESTS , " LET THE WAITRESS ORDER FOR US. " WHEELS AND I ARE GAME AND WE LET THE WAITRESS , WHO WAS VERY COOL & EXPERIENCED ( WHICH WAS KEY TO THIS EXPERIMENT ) , ORDER THE ENTIRE MEAL......APPETIZERS AND ENTREES. OUR COUSIN HAD ONE RULE TO THE WAITRESS AND IT WAS , " PICK FOOD THAT IS REALLY GOOD BUT FOR SOME REASON PEOPLE DO NOT ORDER IT. " IT WAS PRETTY COOL TO GET SURPRISED WITH FOOD AND SHE WOULD EXPLAIN WHY SHE PICKED IT.  THE ENTIRE MEAL WAS EXCELLENT.

  - THE BOOZE IS FLOWING REALLY GOOD........I MEAN REALLY GOOD. GIN , BOURBON , BEER .....GOOD GOD. THIS AREA IS CLEAN , FUN , COOL , AND PACKED WITH PEOPLE. A TON OF PHILLY PEOPLE TOO.

  - WE WALK BACK TO OUR COUSIN'S HOTEL TO SAY GOOD BYE AND THAN WE TAKE AN UBER TO OURS.  WE END THE NIGHT WITH SOME RED WINE IN OUR ROOM FOR A NIGHTCAP. YES , I BROUGHT WINE IN MY LUGGAGE.

   I WAS COMPLETELY SURPRISED HOW FUN AND BEAUTIFUL DOWNTOWN PITTSBURGH IS. I HAD A GREAT TIME.

  SUNDAY      7 - 8 - 18

  BACK HOME.

  START MORNING HANGING OUT IN A BATHROOM. YEP.........BUT IT WAS CLEAN. OUR HOTEL ROOM WAS PITCH BLACK AND 64 DEGREES. IT WAS LIKE ICE.  I GET OUT OF BED WITH A PENIS THE SIZE OF A PEANUT SHELL AND GO SHOWER. I DID NOT WANT TO WAKE WHEELS SO AFTER SHOWERING I BROUGHT MY COMPUTER INTO THE BATHROOM AND DID MY INTERNET STUFF.  3 HOURS LATER WHEELS GOT UP.

  SOME FAMILY DO BREAKFAST AND WE VISIT THEM IN THE DINING AREA. THIS HOTEL IS REALLY NICE BUT HAVE HORRIBLE ELEVATOR SERVICE. THAN WE CHECK-OUT , GET VALET , LOAD LUGGAGE , AND GET ON THE ROAD.  WE MAKE OKAY TIME AT BEST.  BUT IT WAS THE FIRST STOP THAT WAS INTERESTING.

  ABOUT 1 1/2 HOURS IN WE MAKE A REST STOP.  WHEELS IS JONESING FOR " POPEYE'S CHICKEN. " THIS IS WHEN THE SHIT SHOW STARTED.  OFF THE HIGHWAY THIS REST STOP HAD 6 STORES IN IT. EACH CHAIN LIKE BURGER KING , STARBUCKS , A PIZZA PLACE , POPEYE'S , AND MORE WERE ABSOLUTELY PACKED WITH CUSTOMERS. LINES WERE 50 DEEP. THE CASH THEY MUST MAKE WAS UNTHINKABLE. WELL , POPEYE'S WAS THE WORST......SERVICE WISE.

  THE STORY : POPEYE'S HAS 5 WORKERS.  2 COOKS , 1 KID OUT FRONT , 1 OLDER LADY , AND 1 GIRL WE ARE NOT SURE WHAT SHE DID.  LET'S ANALYZE :

  - 2 COOKS --- THEY TALKED AND ONLY COOKED CHICKEN.

  - 1 KID OUT FRONT - HE USED THE REGISTER , PLACED CHICKEN ORDERS , FILLED FOOD INTO BOXES , GOT CONDIMENTS , FILLED OTHER ORDERS , RECEIVED ALL ORDERS , RANG UP ALL CUSTOMERS , GOT SODA CUPS , AND GREETED EVERYONE.

  - 1 OLDER LADY - COUNTED WATER BOTTLES.

  - 1 GIRL - STOOD IN BACK LOOKING AT COOKS.

 OK , SO , CAN YOU SEE WHAT IS GOING ON HERE ? IT WAS THE MOST POORLY RUN FAST FOOD STORE I EVER SEEN AND PEOPLE WERE LETTING THEM KNOW IT.

  - ONE HOT GIRL IN FRONT OF US SAID , " I AM CONTACTING POPEYE'S NOW AND COMPLAINING. "

  - ONE HOT GIRL AND HER MOM BEHIND WHEELS AND I COMPLAINED THEY COULD DO IT BETTER.

  - ONE GUY SAID , " WE SHOULD GET THE FOOD FOR FREE. "  I SHOOK MY HEAD ON THIS ONE.

  - ONE FATHER OF 4 REAMED OUT THE OLD LADY AND KID.

  - ONE CUSTOMER WAITED IN LINE FOR 45 MINUTES AND THAN THREW THE FOOD AT A TRASHCAN....POINT TAKEN.

  SO , WHEELS AND I WAITED. WE WERE ABOUT 10TH IN LINE AND IT TOOK ABOUT 40 MINUTES. THE 1 YOUNG KID DID EVERYTHING. THE 1 OLDER LADY SAID , " I DON'T KNOW HOW TO DO THE FRONT LINE. I AM NEW HERE. " YEP......PRETTY TOUGH TO PUT 2 PIECES OF CHICKEN IN A BOX.

   PEOPLE COMPLAINED THE WHOLE WAY DOWN THE LINE. APPARENTLY 3 WORKERS WENT OUT FOR BREAK DURING PEAK LUNCH TIME. IT REALLY WAS A SHIT SCENE TO SEE.  OTHER FAMILY MEMBERS WAITED ABOUT 2 MINUTES AND DECIDED TO GO TO AN A-PLUS STORE AND BURGER KING FOR FOOD.

  THE ONLY SILVER LINING WAS WHEELS AND I TALKED TO 2 HOT CHICKS AND ONE MOM. IT WAS ENTERTAINING.  THE FOOD WAS OKAY.  THE REST STOP USUALLY TAKES 15-20 MINUTES AND WE WERE THERE OVER AN HOUR.

  BACK ON THE ROAD AND WE MAKE LESS THAN OKAY TIME. WE GET DROPPED OFF AT HOME. OUR ELDEST , PUP , AND RABBIT GREET US.  FAMILY STAYS FOR ABOUT 5 MINUTES AND ROLL OUT. WE SETTLE IN.

  I HEAD TO THE NAIL TIRED ON MY MOTORCYCLE. I SPEND A SOLID HOUR PREPPING THE BAR.

  PHILLIES LOSE AND I WAS SEMI-SADDENED HOST RUSSIA LOST IN SOCCER IN A PENALTY SHOOT-OUT.

  BACK HOME WE GET " ZESTOS " FOR DINNER. WE TAKE A RIDE TO A FAMILY MEMBER'S HOUSE AND HAVE DINNER THERE. WE TREATED FOR DINNER SINCE OUR FAMILY MEMBER TREATED FOR PHILLIES TICKETS AND DROVE BOTH WAY TO PITTSBURGH. WE HEAD TO THE FAMILY MEMBER'S HOUSE WITH THE PUP.

  THE PUP LOVES THE PROPERTY WE ARE AT. WE FEED A TURTLE AND SOME COY IN A POND AND HANG FOR ABOUT 1 HOUR. BY 8:30PM WE ROLL HOME. I AM EXHAUSTED AND THINK OF GOING TO BED NOW.

  I STAY UP AND DO NOT DRINK ANYMORE ALCOHOL. I AM JUST BURNT OUT.  I DO SOME COMPUTER WORK AND THAN GET A CALL FROM A MOUNTAIN HOUSE RENTER. A WOMEN COULD NOT GET THE TV ON BECAUSE THE LAST RENTER MUST OF HAD KIDS AND SET IT TO A DIFFERENT INPUT. I ASSUME THEY USED Wii OR X-BOX OR PORN. AFTER 10 MINUTES SHE GOT THE TV TO WORK VIA MY INSTRUCTIONS.

  OFF TO BED AND MY BEDROOM IS 60 DEGREES. MY ELDEST SET THE THERMOSTAT UPSTAIRS TO 60. THIS AFFECTS MY BEDROOM ONLY ON THE FIRST FLOOR. I WAS NOT A HAPPY CAMPER.

  MONDAY        7 - 9 - 18

  ONLY ONE THING ON WHEELS AND I MINDS...............A LITTLE DUCK.

  LIKE ALL PARENTS WE WORRY. OUR YOUNGEST HAS BEEN IN CONNECTICUT WITH FRIENDS FOR OVER A WEEK AND TODAY THE KID CAME HOME. I ADORE THIS KID AND I BEGAN TEXTING TO GET ETA'S OF HER ARRIVAL. LIKE LITTLE KIDS WHEELS , MYSELF , AND THE PUP KNEELED ON OUR COUCH LOOKING OUT THE BAY WINDOW KNOWING SHE WAS CLOSE. WHEN SHE ARRIVED THE DOG HOWLED.

 YOUNGEST ARRIVES AND WE UNLOAD AND SAY THANK YOU TO THE FRIEND AND FATHER.  NOW I CAN BEGIN MY DAY.............WITH MY KID...............WHICH I LOVE.

  YOUNGEST AND I DRIVE WHEELS TO THE AIRPORT. WHEELS HEADS OUT TO WORK FROM ABROAD AT A BEAUTIFUL HOTEL AND AREA.

  TRADITION - ANYTIME AT THE AIRPORT WE STOP AT " NICK'S ROAST BEEF " ON THE WAY HOME. MY KID ENJOYED 2 ORDERS OF BROCCOLI RABE AND GRAVY FRIES. I GOT NOTHING BECAUSE I AM FAT AND DRANK & ATE LIKE 10 MEN OVER THE WEEKEND.

  WE STOP AT THE NAIL TO DROP SOME THINGS OFF. WE NEVER WENT INSIDE.

  BACK HOME WE GO OUTSIDE TO FINISH THE GARDENS WITH SEA SHELLS. IT WAS THE LAST PROJECT TO DO. EARLIER THIS MORNING I STAKED DRIVEWAY LIGHTS AND FLAGS INTO THE BORDERING GROUND OF THE FRONT GARDENS. I SWEPT ALOT TOO. MY YOUNGEST AND I BORDER 2 GARDENS WITH MANY SEA SHELLS. EACH YEAR WE WRITE SOMETHING IN THE GARDEN WITH THE SEA SHELLS. THIS YEAR WE WROTE " EAGLES LII ! ". I POSTED PICTURES ON FACEBOOK FOR FAMILY AND FRIENDS TO SEE.

  OFF TO THE SWIM CLUB WHERE THE WATER IS AWESOME.  I PLAY WITH MY KID AND SHOOT SOME WATER BASKETBALL. IT IS GLORIOUS. I ALSO SWIM LAPS AND STARE AT THE HOT LIFE GUARDS LIKE A MENTAL PATIENT. GOD TO BE YOUNG AGAIN.

  BACK HOME WE SETTLE IN. THE KID SNUGGLES WITH THE PUP AND I HEAD TO THE NAIL ON MY MOTORCYCLE. THE WHOLE RIDE I JUST THINK HOW GLORIOUS IT IS TO HAVE OUR YOUNGEST HOME.

  AT THE NAIL I START MY NORMAL STUFF. I LIKE THE NEW BARSTOOLS BIG TIME. I EXCHANGE 4 NEW ONES FOR FOUR OLD ONES. I TOOK THE OLD ONES HOME YESTERDAY. OH , AND BY " NEW " I MEAN CRAIGSLIST. WHAT SUCKS IS I WENT TO BUY 6 MORE AND SOMEONE ELSE BOUGHT THEM.....OH WELL. I AM STILL VERY CONTENT IN BUYING 4 BAR STOOLS IN EXCELLENT SHAPE FOR $50. THEY RUN ABOUT $60 EACH SO THIS WAS AN EXCELLENT DEAL.

  PHILLIES SPLIT DOUBLE HEADER WITH THE STINKING METS. SO SHOULD OF BEEN A SWEEP.

  BACK HOME I WIND DOWN WITH SEVERAL BEERS AND A GLASS OF WINE.....NO BRANDY.

  TUESDAY   7 - 10 - 18

  WELCOME TO THE DARK SIDE MY.............YOUNG.............JEDI.

  YOU WANT A LONG DAY. HERE IT IS.

  UP AT 5:30AM I START MY NORMAL ROUTINE......WEBSITE , EMAILS , BLOG , MOVE RABBIT TO GARDEN , FEED RABBIT , PUT TRASHCANS OUT , WALK DOG , FEED DOG , AND SO ON.

  SPEAKING OF WEEDS. THE COMPANY SENT US A BILL MORE THAN TWICE WHAT I WAS QUOTED.  SOUNDS LIKE THEY DO NOT WANT TO WAIT 10 WEEKS TO GET PAID TOO...........LIKE WE DID FOR THEIR WORK.

  MY YOUNGEST AND I HEAD TO OUR FIRST SIDE JOB AT 9:30AM.  WE ARRIVE IN THE LANSDALE AREA AND BEGIN. I CAN NOT TELL YOU HOW HELPFUL AND JOYFUL IT IS TO WORK WITH MY YOUNGEST. ANYWAY , ON THE LIST - PAINTING FASCIA BOARDS IN BOTH FRONT AND BACK OF HOUSE ( THESE ARE RIGHT BELOW THE GUTTERS , CLEAN OUT GUTTERS ( THE ROOF WAS BURNING HOT ) , PAINT FRONT AWNING AND AROUND FRONT DOOR TRIM , CHANGE A FRONT LANTERN LIGHT BULB ( I WAS TOLD THE HUSBAND COULD NOT DO IT SO MY YOUNGEST DID ) , SECURE 3 FENCE POSTS , AND FIX A GATE THAT WAS NOT CLOSING PROPERLY ( HAD TO DIG OUT ALL ROCKS ALONG THE FENCE AND GATE AREA AND THAN SECURE....NOT FUN IN 95 DEGREE HEAT ) , TOTALLY MACGYVERED A FRONT DOOR CLOSER ....THE CUSTOMER WAS ELATED ) , FIXED A HOSE HOLDER AND ROLLED UP A 100 FOOT GARDEN HOSE , AND THAN RE-LOADED A 100 TOOLS. THE CUSTOMER DID ADD ON THINGS SO THIS JOB WENT LONGER THAN EXPECTED........3 1/2 HOURS.

  DRIVE TO MY COUSINS PLACE " GOOMBA'S PIZZERIA " FOR A VERY GOOD ITALIAN HOAGIE. WE SIT IN THE VAN WITH THE A/C ON AND TALK AND EAT. I LOVED EVERY SECOND. WE SPLIT THE HOAGIE. I CHANGE CLOTHES THERE TOO.

  ARRIVE AT 2ND JOB TO FIX AND MACGYVER 3 OFFICE CHAIRS , SECURE CABINET KNOBS IN A KITCHEN , AND CLEAN A TOILET IN WHICH SOMEONE HAD MASSIVE AMOUNTS OF CHILI AND MEXICAN FOOD THE NIGHT BEFORE. THE MANAGER SAID ,"  HAD TO JUMP BACK WHEN FLUSHING BECAUSE IT WAS THAT DISGUSTING. "  WE NEVER FOUND THE CULPRIT BUT I CLEANED IT SINCE I HAVE THIS EXPERIENCE AT THE NAIL. ALSO , I USED THE CLEANING CREW'S CART WITH ALL KINDS OF DISINFECTANTS AND BLUE WATER CLEANERS. IT MADE THE JOB SO MUCH EASIER. WE TRASHED SOME OLD OFFICE CHAIR PARTS TOO. MY YOUNGEST WAS PAID IN SUGAR COOKIES BY THE SECRETARY THERE.

  LOAD UP AND ROLL HOME. WE SETTLE IN WITH THE PUPPY WHICH IS SO AWESOME EVERY TIME WE SEE HER. THIS DOG IS ABSOLUTELY PURE JOY. I WISH THE WHOLE WORLD WAS DOGS.

  CONVINCE MY KID TO GO TO THE SWIM CLUB AGAIN. MY YOUNGEST ALWAYS SAYS " NO ". BUT DRIVING HOME AFTERWARDS I ASKED , " SO , WAS IT WORTH GONG TO THE SWIM CLUB ? " SHE RELUCTANTLY SAYS , " YESSSSS. "

  SO WHY DID MY KID SAY " YES " ? AFTER NOT WANTING TO GO ? AND WHY DID I WRITE " WELCOME TO THE DARK SIDE " AT THE TOP OF TODAY'S BLOG ? WELL , MY KID IS DOING OPPOSITE OF WHAT I WANT. SHE IS MOVING TOWARDS MY FAMILY NAME " THE DARK SIDE " THAN WHEELS FAMILY NAME ( THE JEDI ).

   HERE IS THE SHORT EXPERIENCE :

  - WE ARRIVE AT THE POOL AROUND 5:30PM AND IT IS PACKED. THIS IS RARE BECAUSE AT THIS TIME MOST PEOPLE HEAD HOME FOR DINNER. RIGHT BEFORE THE ENTRANCE IS A NICE WOMAN AT A TABLE WITH NAME TAGS. THE SIGN ON HER TABLE SAYS , " ST. THOMAS SPLASH PARTY ". I SAY TO HER , " HELLO , WHAT IS A SPLASH PARTY ? " THE WOMAN RESPONDS NICELY, " EVERYONE HAVING FUN IN THE POOL. " I GO TO TAKE A STICKY NAME TAG BUT MY KID STOPS ME. THIS WAS THE FIRST WARNING SIGN.

  - WE JUMP IN THE POOL AND PLAY AND TALK. I ADORE EVERY SECOND WITH THIS KID. I ALSO CLEAN OFF THE  PAINT ON  MY HANDS. HEY......CHLORINE IS THE BEST. A 12 YEAR GIRL IN THE POOL SWIMS TO US AND ASKS IF WE PLAY WITH HER. SHE KEEPS SAYING , "  COME HERE , COME HERE , COME HERE " AND SWIMS AWAY. I ASK HER IF SHE IS FROM ST. THOMAS AND PART OF THIS CHURCH GROUP TODAY. SHE RESPONDS , " YES ".  MY KID RELUCTANTLY PLAYS REALLY YOUNG GAMES WITH HER LIKE HOW MANY TIMES CAN YOU SPIN UNDER WATER. MY YOUNGEST IS ROLLING HER EYES. THE SWIM CLUB MAKES AN ANNOUNCEMENT , " WILL THE ST. THOMAS CHURCH PARTY PLEASE MEET AT THE YELLOW TENT FOR PRAYER AND DINNER. "  HMMM.......FOOD YOU SAY ?

  - I ASK OUR YOUNG FRIEND , " SO , DID YOU EAT YET ? " SHE REPLIES , " YES , I HAD WATERMELON AND SOME COOKIES. "   HMMMMMMM......COOKIES YOU SAY ? MY DAUGHTER LOOKS AT ME LIKE SHE DOES MANY TIMESWITH THE FACE OF " PLEASE DAD DON'T ". I ASK THE YOUNG GIRL , " SO , DID YOU GO TO C.C.D. AT ST. THOMAS AND GO TO SCHOOL THERE TOO. " SHE REPLIES , " YES , BUT I AM DONE C.C.D. SINCE MY CONFIRMATION. "  I TURN TO MY KID AND ASK , " DIDN'T YOU GO TO C.C.D. AT ST. THOMAS ? " THE KID REPLIES , " NO , IT WAS ST. CATHERINE'S. " I REPLY , " BUT BOTH C.C.D'S SCHOOLS ARE SAINTS WITH WOMEN'S NAMES RIGHT ? " MY YOUNGEST SAYS , " YES , PLEASE DON'T DO THIS. " I TURN TO OUR NEW YOUNG FRIEND AND ASK , " SO , ARE YOU GOING TO GET MORE COOKIES ? "  MY KID GASPS WITH EMBARRASSMENT AND SAYS , " PLEASE , DON'T DO THIS. "

  - WE GET OUT OF THE POOL AND FOLLOW THIS NEW LITTLE GIRL " FRIEND " TO THE YELLOW TENT FOR PRAYER. THE YOUNG KID STOPS TO SAY HELLO TO HER FAMILY BUT MY YOUNGEST AND I KEEP WALKING TO THE MASSIVE SPREAD OF FOOD AT THE YELLOW TENT. MY KID IS GIGGLING AND SAYS , " WE ARE NOT DOING THIS. " I REPLY , " YES WE ARE MY YOUNG JEDI. " THE PRAYER ENDS I SAY ALITTLE LOUDLY , " AMEN !! ". MY KID SHAKES HER HEAD AT ME.  WE ARE GREETED BY A DELIGHTFUL WOMAN WHO SAYS TO US , " HELLO , WOULD YOU LIKE A LEMONADE OR WATER ? " I RESPOND , " WELL HELLO TO YOU AND YES.....WE'LL TAKE BOTH. "  WE WALK AROUND THE YELLOW TENT SHAPED IN A SQUARE. ALL 4 SIDES HAVE TABLES OF FOOD......PIZZA , HOAGIES , BRUSCHETTA , SALAD , COOKIES , BROWNIES , CHIPS , AND MORE. " WE BEGIN FILLING OUR PLATES AND WALK TO AN OPEN PICNIC TABLE. THERE IS AT LEAST A 100 PEOPLE IN THIS AREA. WE SIT AND EAT AND MY KID SHAKES HER HEAD AGAIN CALLS ME A " NUDGE "

  - WHILE SITTING ,TO MAKE THE RUSE OF US BELONGING TO THE ST. THOMAS CHURCH GROUP I BEGIN TO FAKE WAVE TO PEOPLE NOT LOOKING AT ME. I WAVE SEVERAL TIMES TO ADULTS AND KIDS IN THIS GROUP BUT.....THEY ARE NOT LOOKING AT ME. I WANT PEOPLE LOOKING AT ME WAVING TO THINK I KNOW PEOPLE HERE. MY KIDS SAYS , " MY GOD CAN YOU STOP." I RESPOND , " HOW'S YOUR PIZZA AND HOAGIE ? "

  - FINISHED DINNER I CONVINCE MY KID TO TAKE A 2ND WLAK TO THE YELLOW FOOD TENT FOR DESERT. I HAND HER A PLATE AND SHE FILLS IT UP WITH COOKIES , BROWNIES , CHOCOLATE COVERED PRETZELS , AND MORE.  WE WALK BACK TO OUR PICNIC TABLE AND SHE ASKS , " HOW AM I GOING TO GET ALL THE DESERTS OUT OF THE POOL AREA ? " I REPLY , " BY PUTTING THEM IN OUR POOL BAG. " THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT WE DID. WE ROLL HOME AND I MAKE JOKES THE WHOLE WAY. I MAKE HER LAUGH AND SHAKE HER HEAD. I TELL HER , " I REALLY DON'T LIKE YOU MOVING TO THE DARK SIDE OF MY NAME. " SHE REPLIES , " I SAID ' NO ' A BUNCH OF TIMES. " I REPLY , " A BUNCH IS LIKE 30 TIMES.....YOU SAID ' NO ' 3 TIMES. " SHE REPLIES , " OH MY GOD YOU'RE SUCH A NUDGE. " I SAY, " YOU KNOW. THESE ARE THE STORIES YOU WILL REMEMBER. YOU CAN SAY TO FRIENDS OR FAMILY ' I REMEMBER WHEN MY DAD TOOK CHURCH FOOD AT OUR SWIM CLUB........" MY KID GIGGLES AND SAYS , " YEAH.....BUT YOU'RE STILL A NUDGE. "

  WE ARRIVE HOME AND SHE MAKES COOKIES AND ICE CREAM WHILE I HEAD TO THE NAIL ON MY MOTORCYCLE. AFTER ARRIVING FOR ABOUT 45 MINUTES I TEXT MY YOUNGEST , " SO , YOU ALWAYS STEAL CHURCH FOOD ? " THE KID TEXTS BACK , " NUDGE ".

  I GET SOME BAND WORK DONE , WATCH THE PHILLIES WIN WITH A NEW ROOKIE PITCHER , AND ME & A BAND MEMBER RE-DO A LINE-UP OF BANDS 3 TIMES TO MAKE ALL 8 ACTS HAPPY. NOT 15 MINUTES AFTER I SENT A 3RD GROUP EMAIL OUT 2 BANDS REPLY SAYING THEY WANT LATER TIME SLOTS. I HAD A NICE LITTLE CROWD BUT BY 1AM I HAD TO CLOSE. THIS WAS A LONG DAY AND NIGHT. 

  I TALK TO WHEELS VIA PHONE. SHE CALLS ME FROM HER HOTEL AND I ASK , " HOW WAS YOUR DINNER ? " SHE TELLS ME HER HOTEL IS NEW AND BEAUTIFUL , THEY ATE ON A 50TH FLOOR ROOF TOP RESTAURANT OVER LOOKING THE CITY , HAD PHENOMENAL FOOD , CHILLED WITH BUSINESS FRIENDS , AND WAS COMPED 4 FREE DRINKS. SHE ASKS ME , " SO , WHAT DID YOU DO FOR DINNER ? " I REPLY , " ME AND YOUR DAUGHTER STOLE PIZZA FROM A CHURCH CROUP. "

  I ARRIVE HOME AND MAKE LEFTOVER FETTUCCINI ALFREDO PASTA FOR MY YOUNGEST WHO IS STILL UP. SHE EATS IN THE MAIN ROOM AND WE WATCH SPONGE BOB AND THE MOVIE " THE WITCH , THE LION , AND THE WARDROBE." SOMETHING LIKE THAT.

  OFF TO BED BY 2AM.....MAN I WAS HURTING.

   WEDNESDAY        7 - 11 - 18

  A SMOOTHIE IS BETTER TASTING WHEN DRINKING......................BUT " TIME " WAS ON MY SIDE.

  LET THE RUNNING BEGIN........IT NEVER STOPS. IT IS JUST EXHAUSTING.

  GET A CALL IN THE MORNING FROM MY BEER DISTRIBUTOR THAT OUR DELIVERY WILL BE IN 20 MINUTES. GET DRESSED AND DRIVE TO BANK FOR A DEPOSIT , THAN TO THE LIQUOR STORE , THAN FILL UP MY CAR & CAR GAS TANK , AND THAN ARRIVE AT THE NAIL. AS THE GATE IS OPENING AND I AM PULLING IN THE BEER GUY'S TRUCK IS RIGHT BEHIND. YEP.......WHEN DRIVING I HIT EVERY GREEN LIGHT AND AT THE LIQUOR STORE THE MANAGER WAS OUTSIDE THE BAY PICK-UP DOORS CATCHING A SMOKE SO I DID NOT HAVE TO GO THROUGH THE MAIN REGISTER AREA IN THE STORE........RIGHT TO THE BACK.  IT IS LITTLE THINGS LIKE THESE THAT MAKE MY DAY A LITTLE NICER. WONDER HOW LONG THAT WILL LAST ?

  STOCK A TON OF BEER AND DO OTHER PROJECTS LIKE WIPE DOWN ALL CEILING FANS , TV'S , AND PA SYSTEM. FOR THE 4TH TIME I TRY TO FIX A 4 FOOT CEILING FLORESCENT LIGHT BUT CAN'T. I SPRAY SOME WEEDS OUT BACK ( SO AMAZED WEEDS CAN GROW THREW MACADAM BLACK TOP !! ) CLEAN KITCHEN AREA AND SOME OTHER LITTLE PROJECTS. I TRASH A TON OF CARDBOARD IN THE DUMPSTER AND AFTER 2 1/2 HOURS I HEAD HOME BY 2:30PM. I AM BUMMING BECAUSE I ONLY HAVE SEVERAL HOURS TO REST UNTIL MY SHIFT STARTS AT 5PM AND I HAVE TO RETURN TO THE NAIL.

  I DECIDE TO MAKE A SMOOTHIE. I WANT TO USE UP THE REMAINING BANANAS , BLUE BERRIES , AND STRAWBERRIES WHICH ARE GETTING CLOSE TO COMPOST MODE.  I LOAD THEM IN THE BLENDER GLASS WITH ALMOND MILK AND CRUSHED ICE CUBES. I FLIP THE LARGE GLASS UPSIDE DOWN TO THE MAGIC BULLET BLENDER MACHINE.  OH , JUST ONE PROBLEM................I DID NOT TAKE OFF THE DRINKING LID FOR THE BLENDING LID WHICH HAS SHARP BLADES TO SPIN THE FRUIT. 16 OUNCES OF FRUIT MIX SPILL ALL OVER THE KITCHEN COUNTER , THE TOASTER , AND IN THE MAGIC BULLET MACHINE ITSELF. I SCREAMED AND CURSED SO LOUD THAT GOD HIMSELF HEARD ME............AND CALLED ME A LOSER.

 NOW I HAVE TO WASTE PRECIOUS TIME I HAVE CLEANING THE FUCKING MAGIC ASS BULLET MACHINE.  I CLEAN UP THE KITCHEN AND THE BULLET INSIDE & OUT. I PLACE THE MACHINE OUTSIDE ON THE HOT PATIO IN THE SUN TO DRY ANY INTERIOR PARTS. I FLIP IT EVERY HOUR TO GET ANY REMAINING WATER OUT. THE SUN IS HOT SO I AM CONFIDENT IT WILL BURN ALL MOISTURE UP.

  MAKE ANOTHER SMOOTHIE BY SWIPING OFF THE KITCHEN COUNTER FRUIT MIXTURE INTO A BOWL. I ADD MORE REMAINING FRUIT AND MIX IN A STANDARD BLENDER. OH MY GOD IT WAS SO GOOD !! SAID NO ONE EVER. I THINK OF DAIRY QUEEN WHEN DRINKING IT.

  LAY ON THE COUCH AND BEGIN WATCHING " LUKE CAGE " WHILE PETTING MY PUP.  I FALL ASLEEP IN 3 DURING THE OPENING CREDITS.

  OFF TO THE NAIL AND I AM GLAD I PREPPED ALREADY. I BEGIN LOADING IN 5 BANDS.  A SEMI-NEW FEMALE COLLEGE BARTENDER ( FRIENDS WITH MY ELDEST ) IS ON SHIFT TONIGHT. SHE PICKS UP MY YOUNGEST , A BARSTOOL , AND FAN.  THE NIGHT IS STEADY AND THE MUSIC IS GOOD. I RUN A TIGHT SMOOTH SHOW BUT ONLY ONE FOOD ORDER. I ASK ANOTHER FRIEND OF MY ELDEST TO PICK UP MY YOUNGEST AT THE NAIL  SHE SAYS YES BECAUSE SHE IS STOPPING BY OUR HOUSE TO PICK UP THE PUP TO GO TO COLLEGE AND VISIT MY ELDEST. YOU GOT ALL THAT ? I DON'T EITHER.

  OF COURSE AFTER I LET MY YOUNGEST HEAD HOME..........10 FOOD ORDERS. THE FEMALE BARTENDER I WORKED WITH TONIGHT I REALLY LIKE AND ADMIRE. SHE IS ADORABLE , HARD WORKING , AND ONE HECK OF A COLLEGE STUDENT.

  I TOOK A PREVENTATIVE MEASURE TODAY. I CONTACTED SOME BARTENDERS AND TRUST MY ANTENNAS.

  MET MERCURY AMUSEMENT WHERE I GOT THE LOW DOWN ON THE BAR DOWN THE STREET AND FUTURE FLYERS TICKETS.

  SO KNEW THE PHILLIES WOULD LOSE IN EXTRA INNINGS.  IN THE 10 INNING , THE PHILLIES PITCHER THROWS HIGH HEAT ON A 2-1 COUNT. THE MET BATTER SWINGS LIKE THE TASMANIAN DEVIL AND MISSES BIG TIME. I SAY TO MYSELF , " HE SHOULD THROW THE FAST BALL HIGH AGAIN. "  OUR PITCHER THROWS A HANGING CURVE BALL AND THE MET BATTER HITS THE STATUE OF LIBERTY. PHILLIES LOSE 3 - 0 ON A 3 RUN WALK OFF HOME RUN.......BLOW.

  THE NIGHT ENDS PERFECTLY. ALL BANDS MOVE IN AND OUT QUICKLY.  WE CLOSED AND GOT OUT OF THERE.

  MOTORCYCLE RIDE HOME AND REPLAY " LUKE CAGE ". I MADE A SEAGRAM TWISTED LIME GIN & DIET TONIC WITH LIME WEDGES. OH MY GOD SO MUCH BETTER THAN A COLD SAM ADAMS AND A SNIFTER OF BLACKBERRY BRANDY...........BLOW.

  ACTUALLY IT WAS GOOD AND I HAD 10 OF THEM.  ALL ZEROES ACROSS THE BOARD ON INGREDIENTS LIKE SUGAR , SALT , AND SUCH. CALORIES ARE ABOUT 100 A SHOT. I PUT 11 SHOTS IN EACH OF MY DRINKS.

  OFF TO BED WHERE GETTING UP FROM THE COUCH IS PAINFUL.

  30 BANDS AND ACTS COMING THROUGH UNTIL SUNDAY.

 ON A SAD NOTE I HAVE CANCELLED " OPEN BLUES " WHICH WAS ONCE A MONTH.  FOR THE MOST PART WE LOST MONEY EVERY SHOW FOR 5 1/2 YEARS. I BELIEVED IN IT SO BAD BUT THE NUMBERS JUST HURT TOO MUCH.

  THURSDAY     7 - 12 - 18

  BACK IN THE BEAN TOWN AND IT ONLY TOOK ME 30 MINUTES FOR ME TO MAKE WHEELS SUPER CRY LAUGH.

  START OFF MORNING LIKE ALWAYS....UP WAY TOO EARLY WITH NO SLEEP.

  TODAY WAS MY CHILL DAY. I HAD 8 DAYS OF WORKING BOTH DAY AND NIGHT SO I WANTED TO JUST RELAX.  BY 1PM I WAS DONE MY NORMAL ROUTINE THINGS AND DECIDED TO WATCH A MOVIE. I FELL ASLEEP WITHIN 10 MINUTES.

  OH " BUILD A BEAR ". THEY DID A SPECIAL OF " WHATEVER YOUR KID'S AGE IS , THAT WILL BE THE PRICE. "  THIS USUAL $25 CHARGE TO BUILD A BEAR IS NOW AS CHEAP AS $5 OR $6.  SO , FAT PEOPLE STOOD IN LINE FOR 7 HOURS. THE COMPANY HAD TO STOP BECAUSE OF THE OVERWHELMING RESPONSE. ONE HUGE LADY WITH GIGANTIC TITS SCREAMED AT AN EMPLOYEE ON ACTION NEWS SAYING " MY KID AND I HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR 7 HOURS !!! "  YES , OUR COUNTRY JUST GOT DUMBER BY 7%. TO SAVE $18 YOU STOOD IN LINE FOR 7 HOURS. DUMBEST THING I EVER HEARD. LIKE THE COMEDIAN SAYS , " THERE'S YOUR SIGN.....THERE'S YOUR SIGN."

  ELDEST COMES HOME WITH THE PUP. YEP........THE KID TOOK OUR DOG TO HER COLLEGE APARTMENT.  I CAN'T SAY I LIKE THIS BECAUSE THE DOG GETS STRESSED AND SHE IS A VERY GOOD SECURITY SYSTEM HERE.

  RE-WATCH MOVIE CALLED " JUSTICE LEAGUE ". I DID GO IN AND OUT OF NAPPING A LITTLE BIT BUT OVERALL THIS MOVIE WAS VERY GOOD.  AQUAMAN , WHO ALWAYS GETS DISSED , IS A BAD ASS AND WONDER WOMAN IS A PIECE OF ASS. I DID GIGGLE AT SOME SCENES AND ALSO SHED A TEAR ON OTHER SCENES. TO ME ......THAT'S A GOOD MOVIE.

  YOUNGEST AND I DO A FINAL TOUCH ON THE GARDENS. WE PAINT THE SEASHELLS THAT SPELL " EAGLES " GREEN. THIS LITTLE ART JOB REALLY MAKES THE SEA SHELLS STAND OUT. I POSTED A PICTURE OF MY YOUNGEST AND THE SEASHELLS SPELLING " EAGLES LII ! ". IN LESS THAN 2 HOURS A TON OF FAMILY , BROTHERS , COUSINS , FRIENDS , AND NEIGHBORS ALL RESPONDED........PRETTY COOL.

  OFF TO THE SWIM CLUB WITH MY YOUNGEST. AGAIN.....ADORE BEING WITH THIS KID. WE SHOOT BASKETS AND I EXERCISE BY SWIMMING LAPS.

  HEAD TO THE NAIL WITH MY YOUNGEST AND WE PREP THE NAIL. THE KID HELPS ME TRY TO FIX A CEILING LIGHT. IT WAS MY 5TH ATTEMPT AND THIS TIME I BROUGHT AN ELECTRICAL TESTER. APPARENTLY , IT IS NOT A BAD 4 FOOT FLORESCENT BULB ( WHICH I CHANGED 15 TIMES ) BUT A BAD BALLAST. SINCE THE LIGHT IS OLDER THAN FIRE I WILL JUST REPLACE IT.

  OFF TO THE AIRPORT TO SIT AND WAIT FOR AN HOUR. WHEEL'S PLANE WAS LATE AND THE BEST THING WAS ME CHILLING WITH MY YOUNGEST OFF I-95 LISTENING TO THE MUSIC SHE LIKES AND TALKING. AGAIN , ANOTHER BONDING EXPERIENCE.

  OUR TRADITION IS ALWAYS STOPPING AT " NICK'S ROAST BEEF " ON THE WAY HOME. TONIGHT THAT WOULD CHANGE ON A PLACE WE DRIVE BY 50 TIMES AND NEVER STOP AT. THEY ARE KNOWN FOR PHENOMENAL AND AWARD WINNING MILKSHAKES AND SUPER GREASY FOOD.  TONIGHT AT 9:20PM WE STOPPED AT " NIFTY FIFTY'S ". THE PLACE IS BIG AND SUPER BRIGHT WITH TONS OF NEON LIGHTS.  OH , AND IT WAS PACKED.  WE WAITED ABOUT 10 MINUTES FOR A BOOTH.  HERE IS OUR LITTLE EXPERIENCE :

  - WAITRESS IS COOL AND WE ORDER 2 MILK SHAKES TO SHARE.....TWIX AND REESE'S PIECES. ALL OF US AGREED THAT REESE'S WAS MUCH BETTER. TWIX ACTUALLY TASTED LIKE COFFEE.

  - I ORDER A DOUBLE CHEESE BURGER WITH ONION , LETTUCE , AND TOMATO. YES MY DIET WILL TAKE A BACK SEAT TODAY. IT IS GOOD , BUT IT INSTANTLY FALLS APART WHICH I DID NOT LIKE.

  - WHEELS ORDERS CHICKEN PIZZA CHEESE STEAK. AGAIN , SHE SAID IT WAS GOOD BUT SHE ONLY HAD HALF.

  - YOUNGEST ORDERS SPICY CHICKEN BITES. THEY WERE GOOD.

  - WE SHARE CHEESY , BACON , RANCH FRENCH FRIES. THE ORDER CAME AND NO RANCH WAS IN IT. THE WAITRESS IMMEDIATELY GOT US A SOUFFLÉ CUP OF RANCH. THE FRIES ARE GREASY AND SMOTHERED WITH BEACON , BACON , BACON OIL , FRENCH FRY OIL , CHEESE OIL , AND CHEESE. I GAINED WEIGHT JUST LOOKING AT IT. BETWEEN THE 3 OF US WE ATE LESS THAN HALF OF THE ORDER. I THOUGHT THESE WERE LESS THAN OKAY.

  OVERALL , WE ASKED EACH OTHER , " WOULD WE GO BACK HERE AGAIN ? "  BOTH WHEELS AND OUR YOUNGEST WOULD BUT I WAS A LITTLE MORE RELUCTANT. I WOULD GO BACK BUT ONLY TO SHOW A NEW FAMILY MEMBER THIS PLACE OR VISIT JUST FOR THE SHAKES............MAYBE ONCE A YEAR OR SO. I WAS NOT BLOWN AWAY BY THEIR FOOD. I WAS SURPRISED THE PLACE WAS PACKED AT 10PM SO DON'T TAKE MY ADVICE SO INTENTLY BECAUSE I AM ON A DIET AND THAT IS WHAT I KEPT THINKING. MANY PEOPLE LOVE THIS PLACE. IF YOU ARE FAT WITH YOUR ASS HANGING OVER EACH SIDE OF YOUR CHAIR ( LIKE ME AND THE GUY ACROSS FROM US ) THAN THIS IS THE PLACE FOR YOU.

  BACK HOME WE ARE GREETED BY OUR PUP. THIS IS EXPERIENCE NEVER GETS OLD. IT IS AWESOME AND INSTANTLY BRINGS YOUR BLOOD PRESSURE DOWN. A TOTAL JOY TO HEAR THIS DOG HOWL WITH GLEE AND SHOW HER SMILING TEETH WHILE SNEEZING. IT IS TOO DAMN FUNNY.

  I MAKE DRINKS FOR THE NIGHT AND ONLY LAST ABOUT 45 MINUTES. FOR THE FIRST TIME IN A MONTH I HAVE ONE  LARGE SHOT OF APRICOT BRANDY. I DID NOT ENJOY IT AS MUCH AS I USUALLY DO WHICH I THINK IS A GOOD THING FOR ME.

  OFF TO BED WHERE THE PUP IS ALREADY ON MY COMFORTER.......IT WAS OKAY WITH ME.

  SO , WHAT DID I DO TO MAKE WHEELS ABSOLUTELY CRY LAUGH FOR SEVERAL MINUTES? I MEAN TEARS POURING DOWN HER FACE AND MANY NAPKINS NEEDED TO WIPE AWAY THE TEARS. WELL , THIS WAS A VISUAL JOKE AND I WILL DO THE BEST I CAN.  NOW , WHEELS KNOWS MY " LOOK " AND FACIAL EXPRESSIONS AFTER 33 YEARS. SHE INSTANTLY KNOWS EXACTLY WHAT I AM THINKING.  HERE IS THE SHORT EXPERIENCE :

  - WHILE WAITING FOR A TABLE WE SEE THIS OLDER UNSHAVEN EMPLOYEE. HE IS DISHEVELED AND A WORKER AT " NIFTY FIFTY'S ". HE HAS A SAILOR HAT ON THAT SAYS " J _ _ _ _  ".  HE SLOWLY LUMBERS WHILE HE WALKS AND YOU CAN FEEL HIS PAIN OF WORKING HERE. HIS LIFE REVOLVES AROUND SERVING GREASY FOOD TO CUSTOMERS AND THERE IS NO TUNNEL OR LIGHT AT THE END. I FEEL IT RIGHT AWAY AND WHEELS IS RIGHT BEHIND ME. THE POOR GUY HEARS SCREAMING BABIES AND WHINING KIDS ALL DAY AND NIGHT. FOOD IS BEING THROWN AND KIDS ARE MESSING UP TABLES HE HAS TO CLEAN. THE HEARTACHE IS FELT. I MEAN IT IS PATHETIC AND I PAIN FOR THE GUY. BUT THAN I SEE SOMETHING ON HIS LAPEL. NOW , BOTH WHEELS AND I HAVE NOT SAID ANYTHING TO EACH OTHER ABOUT THIS POOR MAN'S SUFFERING AND ANGUISH THROUGH EACH AND EVERY WORK SHIFT. HE SLOWLY WALKS BY US LIKE TIM CONWAY PORTRAYING THE SUPER OLD MAN WITH WHITE HAIR ON THE CAROL BURNETT TV SHOW. YOU KNOW , WHEN HE JUST SHUFFLES HIS FEET QUICKLY BUT MOVES SLOWER THAN A BABY CRAWLING.  I " LOOK " AT WHEELS AS HE SADLY SHUFFLES BY US. SHE KNOWS MY " LOOK ".  I SURVEY TO HER HIS ENTIRE LIFE STORY WITH JUST ONE " LOOK ".  SHE BEGINS TO LAUGH. BUT THAN I MAKE HER SUPER CRY LAUGH BY POINTING TO MY LAPEL OF WHAT I SAW ON HIS LAPEL EARLIER. IT SAID JUST ONE WORD AS I SHOW WHEELS................" MANAGER ". 

  FRIDAY       7 - 13 - 18

  START MORNING TAKING A WALK TO MAIL LETTERS.  THAN I SPRAY WEEDS IN OUR FRONT GARDENS. YES , IN LESS THAN ONE WEEK WEEDS ARE GROWING BIG TIME. THAN I WEED WHACKED ALL THE EDGES OF ALL GARDENS AND OUR PROPERTY. LOVE THIS NEW WHACKER.......CORDLESS AND POWERFUL.

  OK , GOT THEM OUT OF THE WAY. GO DOWN MY BASEMENT HARDWARE STORE AND FIND A 4 FOOT FLORESCENT LIGHT. I WILL USE THIS TO REPLACE THE BAD FIXTURE AT THE NAIL.  I LOAD IT UP IN OUR JEEP TO BE LATER TRANSPORTED TO THE NAIL.

  TRY TO TAKE IT EASY TODAY SINCE I WILL WORKING TONIGHT.  BUT.....THERE'S ALWAYS SOMETHING. ONE BANK WE HAVE 3 LOANS WITH AND HAVE SO MUCH INFORMATION ON US THEY KNOW WHEN I POOP. WELL , THEY NEED MORE INFO. SO WHEELS PRINTS DOCUMENTS OUT WHILE I MAKE COPIES. I TAKE A CAR RIDE TO THE BANK AND DROP THEM OFF. OUR RESPONSE TO DOCUMENTS NEEDED..............LESS THAN 1 HOUR. THEIR RESPONSE TO WHEN LOAN GETS PROCESSED.........3 MONTHS. 

  OK......NOW I CAN RELAX AT 2PM.  WHEELS HEADS TO A FAMILY DINNER AND I JUST CHILL AND WATCH TV.

  VERY COOL AND A SECRET - WHEELS MOM IS HEADING TO CANADA. ONE OF WHEELS BEST BEST FRIENDS IS HEADING TO CANADA. WHAT ARE THE CHANCES THEY ARE ON THE SAME AIRPLANE ?........PRETTY GOOD. THAT IS AWESOME !

  OFF TO WORK BUT DECIDE TO STOP AT ACME TO PICK UP SOME SOUR MIX. I NOTICE IT IS $5.39 A BOTTLE WHICH IS A LITTLE EXPENSIVE.  I GRAB 2 AND HEAD TO THE REGISTER LINE. A NICE WOMEN LETS ME IN FRONT OF HER BECAUSE I ONLY HAVE 2 ITEMS. THE REGISTER LADY IS A LITTLE CONFUSED AND RINGS MY 2 BOTTLES UP AND BEGINS TO RING UP THE NICE LADY'S STUFF. BOTH OF US TELL THE REGISTER LADY THEY ARE SEPARATE. SHE FIXES THE PROBLEM AND CHARGES ME $6 FOR 2 BOTTLES.......NICE. IT'S THE LITTLE THINGS.

  AT THE NAIL I BEGIN MY ROUTINE. I GET EVERYTHING DONE AND BEGIN TO LOAD IN THE BANDS.

  IT IS A GOOD NIGHT OF PEOPLE AND MUSIC.  SOMETHING RARE IS THE LAST ACT DID A TON OF COVER SONGS. THIS WAS NICE TO SEE AND HEAR. A GOOD CROWD ENJOYED IT AND SANG ALONG. OH , I LOVE WATCHING PEOPLE SING TO SONGS.  THIS ONE BLONDE GIRL WHO WAS A BASS PLAYER IN THE OPENING BAND SANG TO EVERY SONG. SHE WAS ADORABLE.

  PHILLIES WIN WHICH IS SO NICE TO SEE. WHEN THE GAME WAS OVER I PUT ON EAGLES VS ATLANTA PLAYOFF GAME.  I CAN'T GET ENOUGH OF IT AND SOME PEOPLE CAME UP TO ME AND WE TALKED ABOUT THE MIRACLE SEASON THIS YEAR.

  THE NIGHT ROLLED PERFECTLY. I KEEP A CONSTANT LOOK OUT TO HELP BANDS LOAD-IN , LOAD-OUT , SET LENGTHS , SOUND HELP , PARKING , AND MORE.  ALL THE BANDS THANKED ME FOR MY DUE DILIGENCE.

  THE NIGHT IS A FUN. THE BARTENDER AND I DECIDE TO PREP FOR TOMORROW NIGHT BY SETTING UP DIVIDERS AND MORE. BY QUARTER OF 1AM I WANTED TO HEAD HOME.

  I FOLLOW MY ELDEST HOME ON MY MOTORCYCLE. IT IS A BEAUTIFUL NIGHT.  AT HOME I CHILL WITH MY YOUNGEST AND WATCH AN EPISODE OF " LUKE CAGE ". I WAS HAPPY THAT SHE WAS STILL UP.

  HEAD TO BED AROUND 2:30AM. 

  SATURDAY       7 - 14 - 18

  LONG DAY..............BIG NIGHT.

  START MORNING DOING THE JUNE BOOKS FOR THE NAIL.  I CAN NOT TELL YOU HOW HARD IT IS TO COME OUT IN THE BLACK IN THIS COMPETITIVE BUSINESS.  ANOTHER MONTH WE SURVIVE. NO PATS ON BACKS HERE.....JUST KEEP SURVIVING.

  NEIGHBOR GIVES US 5 HOSTA PLANTS. WHEELS FOUND SOME NICE SPOTS IN OUR FRONT GARDENS FOR THEM. I DID SOME MINOR WEEDING WHILE SHE PLANTED THEM.

  PHILLIES LOSE TO LAST PLACE TEAM WITH OUR BEST PITCHER NOLA.......BLOW. SILVER LINING ....BOTH BRAVES AND NATIONALS LOST.

  WHEELS GOES TO THE POOL WITH OUR YOUNGEST. LATER IN THE NIGHT I ASK OUR KID , " DID YOU HAVE FUN AT THE POOL WITH MOM ? " SHE RESPONDS , " YES , IT WAS FUN. " I REPLY , " THAT'S GOOD , BUT IT PROBABLY WAS NOT AS FUN WITHOUT ME THERE ? " SHE REPLIES , " IT WAS FUN. " I SARCASTICALLY RESPOND , " YEAH.......BUT NOT " AS " FUN WITHOUT ME THERE. " THE KID GIGGLES AND SAYS , " YOU'RE A NUDGE. "

  OFF TO THE NAIL EARLY. THE GOOD THING IS WE SET UP ALOT THE NIGHT BEFORE.  31 ACTS WERE BOOKED AND 132 TICKETS WERE SOLD.  THE NAIL WAS PACKED AND OUR STAFF DID AN EXEMPLARY JOB IN MOVING BANDS , DRINK ORDERS , AND FOOD ORDERS. HAVE TO THANK MY CHEF FOR COOKING 4 STRAIGHT HOURS OF NON STOP ORDERS.  OVERALL , ANOTHER VERY EFFICIENT SHOW RUN.

  BACK HOME I SETTLE IN WITH A BEER AND THAN A GIN & TONIC.  I WAS ACHING AND HEADED TO BED AFTER WATCHING A GOOD EPISODE OF " LUKE CAGE ".

  FALL ASLEEP PRETTY MUCH AS MY HEAD HIT THE PILLOW. THAN AT 3:30AM......JUST 2 HOURS INTO SLUMBER.........MY FRICKIN' CPAP MACHINE FLIPS OVER AND SPILLS WATER ON MY BED. I JUST FILLED IT UP THIS MORNING. I SWEAR IT IS ALWAYS SOMETHING.

  SUNDAY      7 - 15 - 18

  I KEEP PUSHING THIS OLD BODY.

  SLEPT BAD WITH WATER IN MY BED FROM MY TURNED OVER C-PAP MACHINE.  SO, WHAT THE HELL....LET'S START THE DAY.

  MID MORNING I AM AT THE NAIL. YES.......9:30AM I AM AT OUR CLUB THAT OPENS AT 6PM. I.........AM.........AN IDIOT.  ANYWAY , THIS DAMN CEILING LIGHT FIXTURE IS ON MY " GET THE  ' F ' DONE LIST. " I SET UP MY TOOLS AND DO OTHER CRAP AND BEGIN WALKING ON THE BAR TOP TO ACCESS 2 LIGHTS THAT ARE NOT FUNCTIONING. 5 TIMES TRYING TO FIX ONE STUPID LIGHT.  I REPLACE ONE FIXTURE AND FIX THE OTHER. I SEMI-PREP FOR THE NIGHT AS THE RAINS COME. I AM SO GLAD I DID THE OUTSIDE MARQUEE LATE LATE LAST NIGHT.

  WHEELS HEADS TO A BABY SHOWER WITH MY MOM.

  HEAD TO A FAMILY MEMBER'S HOUSE TO INSTALL A LARGE WINDOW. I ALSO WATCH THE WORLD CUP CHAMPIONSHIP WHILE WE WORK. FRANCE CRUSHES CROATIA 4 - 1 ( I KNOW IT WAS 4 - 2 BUT THAT FRENCH GOALIE SHOULD OF NEVER LET THAT 2ND GOAL IN ). ANYWAY , WE SPEND SOME TIME WORKING ON THE WINDOW AND IT CAME OUT REALLY NICE.

  OFF TO LOWES TO RETURN PLUMBING PRODUCT I BOUGHT FOR A CUSTOMER THAT DID NOT ANSWER THEIR DOOR ON 2 OCCASIONS AND DID NOT ANSWER THEIR PHONE ON 3 TRIES. SO..........I CANCELLED THE JOB AND WORKING FOR THIS PERSON FOREVER. IT WAS THE FIRST TIME I EVER DONE THIS IN 35 YEARS. I KNOW IT IS MONEY BUT NOT RETURNING CALLS , TEXTS , OR ANSWERING A DAMN DOOR IS PRETTY FRIGGIN' FRUSTRATING. I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS BULLSHIT.  ANYWAY , AT LOWES I GO RIGHT TO " CUSTOMER SERVICE " WHICH USUALLY HAS LINES AND LONG WAITING. TODAY....FIRST AND DONE IN 3 MINUTES.......NICE. OH , AND I HAVE MY NEW LOWES CREDIT CARD NOW.

  HEAD TO A COUSIN'S GET TOGETHER BBQ AND BIRTHDAY PARTY WITH A PRINCESS. I CALL A FAMILY MEMBER TO CHECK ON HIM. THE BBQ WAS CREATED FOR ALL GUYS SINCE THE GIRLS WERE AT A BABY SHOWER. THE BBQ'S SAUSAEEEGE WAS EXCELLENT ALONG WITH CHEESEBURGERS STUFFED WITH MOZZARELLA AND PEPPERONI. WAY MORE FOOD ARRIVED AND CELEBRATING MY COUSINS 1ST BIRTHDAY. VIA " GROUP-ON " MY COUSIN FOUND A POPULAR TV CHARACTER CALLED " SOPHIA ". I HAVE NO IDEA WHO SHE IS BUT A NICE YOUNG GIRL PLAYED THE PART WONDERFULLY. SHE ARRIVED IN A PRINCESS DRESS , READ A BOOK , TALKED TO THE KIDS , TOOK PICTURES , SUNG HAPPY BIRTHDAY , AND MORE. SHE WAS A REALLY GOOD PERSON AND TOTALLY PLAYED THE PART. I AM SURE MY 1 YEAR OLD COUSIN WILL REMEMBER THIS FOR A LONG TIME OR UNTIL HER NEXT POOP.

  I HAD A GREAT TIME AT MY COUSINS BBQ. LAUGHS , BOOZE , AND STORY TELLING. WHAT WAS EVEN NICER WAS ALL THE GIRL COUSINS STARTED ARRIVING.  NOW WE HAVE A FULL BLOWN OUT PARTY WITH CROWN ROYAL.  I POSTED SOME PICTURES ON FACEBOOK OF THE PRINCESS SOPHIA AND THE BBQ. A FAIR AMOUNT OF BROTHERS , COUSINS , FAMILY , A LOCAL NEIGHBORS ALL HAD COMMENTS......MOSTLY ABOUT DRINKING THE CROWN ROYAL.

  WHEELS FOLLOWS ME HOME UNTIL THE HALF WAY POINT. I HEAD TO THE NAIL AND SHE VEERS OFF FOR HOME. I COULD NOT BELIEVE IT BUT IN A 12 MINUTE RIDE TO THE NAIL I STARTED FALLING ASLEEP. AFTER ONE EXTREMELY SCARY EXPERIENCE I TOLD MYSELF I WILL NEVER CLOSE MY EYES WHILE DRIVING AGAIN. IF I AM TIRED I WILL PULL OVER. I COULD NOT BELIEVE I WAS SO DAMN TIRED AND FOUGHT IT ALL THE WAY TO THE NAIL. I ENTER THE BACK LOT AND PARK. I LEAVE THE A/C ON , RECLINE MY SEAT , AND INSTANTLY FALL ASLEEP FOR 15 MINUTES. I NEEDED THIS SO BAD. POWER NAPS ARE THE BEST THING FOR YOU.

  OPEN UP AND I SEE I HAVE A PHONE MESSAGE. IT IS A BAND AND I RETURN THE CALL. HE ANSWERS AND TELLS ME HIS BAND IS WAITING IN THE SEPTA LOTS FOR 2 HOURS. THE BAND WAS 3 HOURS EARLY. I LOAD THEM IN AND BEGIN MY NIGHT.  A 2 PIECE ACT CALLED " POOR ELIZA " OPENS THE SHOW. THEY WERE FROM BOSTON WITH AN ASIAN LEAD SINGER AND GUITAR PLAYER. SHE WAS ACCOMPLISHED AND VERY ENTERTAINING. THEY WERE ALSO VERY COOL. THAN......DEATH , KILL , DESTRUCTION , CLIMB ON POOL TABLE , REMOVE DRUM KIT TO CENTER OF ROOM .........HARD CORE METAL.  2 BANDS FROM SAN ANTONIO TEXAS PLAYED. THEY WERE ALL VERY COOL AND BEFORE THE SHOW STARTED WE TALKED EMBROIDERY , RAISING CHILDREN , CHURCH PRAYER , AND FINGER PAINTING.  THAN THEY PLAYED AND ALL HELL BROKE LOOSE. THEY SCREAMED ABOUT " BULL SHIT " AND I GRABBED A FIRE EXTINGUISHER FOR SAFETY. AFTER THE RINGING IN MY EARS STOPPED AND PRETTY PINK ELEPHANTS WERE NOT VISIBLE ANYMORE I MADE SOME ORDERS OF FOOD AND ROLLED HOME.

  BACK HOME I SETTLE IN WITH MY ELDEST AND HER 2 FRIENDS. I REALLY LIKE THESE KIDS. WE TALK AND THEY ROLL OUT TO GO BOWLING. YEP....BOWLING.....ON A SUNDAY NIGHT AT 10PM.  SO BELIEVE THAT.

  WHEELS AND I SETTLE IN WITH DRINKS. I HAVE GIN & TONICS AND REFRAIN FROM BEER & BRANDY. WE WATCH A VERY GOOD EPISODE OF " HOMELAND ".

  PHILLIES LOSE 2 OF 3 TO THE LAST PLACE MARLINS.....F'N BLOW.

  OFF TO BED WHERE I FALL ASLEEP RIGHT BEFORE I HIT THE PILLOW. I WAS ACTUALLY SNORING IN MID-AIR AS MY FATNESS FELL LIKE A TREE IN THE WOODS.

   MONDAY        7 - 16 - 18

  I JUST SHAKE MY HEAD ON PEOPLE. IT HAS BECOME A " ME " WORLD. TO ME , IT'S ABOUT DOING THE RIGHT THING.

  WHY DO I GET MYSELF INTO PROJECTS ? AFTER THE NORMAL MORNING ROUTINE STUFF I DECIDED TO GO INTO MY BASEMENT'S TOOL ROOM AND HANG 2 LIGHTS.  I REMOVED AN OLD LIGHT , TAPPED INTO AN EXISTING LIGHT FOR POWER , AND I NOW HAVE 3 OVERHEAD LIGHTS IN MY TOOL ROOM. WHY DID I DO ALL THIS ? I TOOK A 4' FOOT FLORESCENT LIGHT FROM MY TOOL ROOM TO THE NAIL. I HAVE TO THANK MY YOUNGEST FOR HOLDING FLASHLIGHTS FOR ME WHILE I WORKED IN THE DARK WITH THE ELECTRIC OFF.

  2 BARTENDERS LET GO TODAY BUT WILL REMAIN " ON CALL ". BOTH ARE TOO BUSY WITH DAY JOBS SO I COMPLETELY UNDERSTAND. IN RESPONSE , I HIRED 3 COLLEGE GIRLS.....MAYBE 4.

  100 DEGREES OUTSIDE AND IF YOUR A/C IS BLOWING 75 DEGREES INSIDE THAT IS NOT TOO BAD. THAT'S WHAT OURS WAS WHEN I PLACED A TEMPERATURE GAUGE IN THE CEILING REGISTER VENT.

  MY MOTTO FOR THIS YEAR , " NEVER SAY ' NO ' TO THE POOL. "  WHEELS , MYSELF , AND YOUNGEST TOOK A 2 MINUTE DRIVE TO OUR SWIM CLUB. THE WATER WAS GLORIOUS AND EVEN MORE ENTERTAINING IS WATCHING " HOOPS " AKA WHEELS SHOOT BASKETBALLS. I NEVER SEEN ANYTHING LIKE IT. MY YOUNGEST AND I ALSO SWAM LAPS FOR EXERCISE.

  BACK HOME I MAKE A FRESH TURKEY / MOZZARELLA / TOMATO SANDWICH ON TOASTED WHEAT. OH MY GOD IT IS SO MUCH BETTER THAN LASAGNA OR RIGATONI & MEATBALL.

  OFF TO THE NAIL WITH MY VAN AND TOOLS.  I HEAD OUT TO CHANGE THE MARQUE SIGN AND NOTICE THE BANDS FROM LAST NIGHT REMOVED LETTERS FROM A BAND WHO DID NOT SHOW UP. I DO NOT LIKE THIS. I ALSO NOTICE A PIECE OF WINDOW CAPPING IS ON THE GROUND................AND GO GET MY TOOLS.

  FIX THE WINDOW CAPPING STANDING ON A LADDER THAN CHANGE THE MARQUEE. IT WAS THAN I NOTICE AND HEAR CAR HORNS HONKING AND PEOPLE YELLING.  ABOUT 50 YARDS AWAY A SUV IS STUCK SIDEWAYS IN THE MIDDLE OF HAVERFORD ROAD. I POSTED A PICTURE ON FACEBOOK AND HERE IS THE STORY :

  " IT'S ABOUT DOING THE RIGHT THING. THIS GUY AND 2 YOUNG KIDS BROKE DOWN SIDEWAYS IN THE MIDDLE OF HAVERFORD ROAD. THE GENTLEMEN IS STRUGGLING AS THE KIDS WATCHED THEIR DAD. HE CAN NOT BUDGE HIS BROKEN VEHICLE OVER THE CURB. COUNTLESS CARS SPEEDING BY HONKING THEIR HORNS AND YELLING OBSCENITIES. PEOPLE YELLING OUT THEIR WINDOWS AND CURSING MADE ME FEEL HORRIBLE FOR THEM. FOR ONCE , MY BIG SIZE AND WEIGHT CAME IN HANDY. I WALK DOWN AND SAY TO THE KIDS , " C'MON KIDS.....LET'S HELP DAD. " WE PUSH THE CAR ON TO THE SIDEWALK AND THEY EASILY GLIDE IT DOWN TO THE MECHANIC'S PARKING LOY. THE FATHER TURNS TO ME AND SAYS , " GOD BROUGHT YOU TO ME. I CAN NOT THANK YOU ENOUGH." THE KIDS THANKED ME TOO.

  BACK INSIDE I CLEAR A SMALL AREA OF THE  BAR AND WORK ON THE NEWLY INSTALLED 4' FLORESCENT LIGHT. I GET TOOLS , MOUNT A DROP LIGHT , AND BEGIN WORKING.  I WANTED TO " SAFETY " UP THE LIGHT A BIT BY USING PROPER JUNCTION BOXES AND SUCH. I REMOVED AN OLD LIGHT THAT WAS HARNESSED STRONG ENOUGH TO HOLD A SMART CAR. 2 FRIGGIN' HOURS LATER I COMPLETED THIS SIMPLE 30 MINUTE TASK. ANOTHER 15 MINUTES OF CLEANING UP AND PUTTING TOOLS AWAY. I ACTUALLY HAD A CUSTOMER HELP ME WITH TURNING THE LIGHT SWITCH OFF AND ON FOR TESTING. OVERALL , IT CAME OUT EXCELLENT.

  I HAVE SOME PEOPLE COME IN BUT I ROLL HOME AROUND ACTION NEWS TIME.  WHEELS AND I WATCH A VERY GOOD SEASON FINALE EPISODE OF " HOMELAND ". BESIDES HIDING BRANDY , I AM NOW LIMITED BRINGING SPECIALTY BEERS HOME WHICH I CHERISH , LOVE , AND ADORE. I THINK IT HELPS WITH THE MOTTO , " OUT OF SIGHT , OUT OF MIND. "

  THAN I GOT SUPER MELANCHOLY WHILE LAUGHING. I MUST OF SAID , " WHY ROBIN ?? WHY ?? " I WATCHED A HBO DOCUMENTARY ON ROBIN WILLIAMS. IT HAD WONDERFUL EXTRA TIDBITS OF HIS MOVIES , HIS ADLIBBING , OUT TAKES , AND OF COURSE SCENES WHERE WILLIAMS MAKES HIS CO-ACTORS LAUGH BY NOT GOING BY THE SCRIPT. THE DOCUMENTARY ALSO HAD THE DARK AND SAD SIDES OF THIS WONDERFUL TALENT OF A MAN. I SHOOK MY HEAD 20 TIMES WHILE WATCHING THIS AND LAUGHED 20 TIMES. IT IS SO DAMN SAD TO SEE A MAN LOVED BY MILLIONS TO GO OUT LIKE THAT. THE DOCUMENTARY ON HBO IS CALLED " ROBIN WILLIAMS: COME INSIDE MY MIND " . THERE IS A TON OF COMEDIC ACTORS IN IT AND I HIGHLY RECOMMEND WATCHING IT.  THOUGH I DID GO TO BED PRETTY SOLEMN LIKE.

  TUESDAY       7 - 17 - 18

  I HAVE TO ASK MY WIFE AND YOUNGEST FOR A SIMPLE " LIKE "...............NO COMMENTS , JUST  A MILLISECOND OF TIME TO CLICK " LIKE ". 

  I REALLY HAVE TO CUT DOWN ON THIS DO STUFF DURING THE DAY AND THAN WORK 7 HOURS AT NIGHT. MY LEGS ARE HURTING BIG TIME. NO ONE CARES.

  FLIES GETTING IN OUR HOUSE PART II. I GOOGLED IT AND THEY CAN COME IN THROUGH ROOF VENTS.  JESUS...........I KEEP OUR VACUUM OUT WITH A NOZZLE. TODAY AT LEAST 30 FLIES WERE SUCKED UP.  USUALLY IT IS JUST A 2 - 3 WEEK SPAN BUT THIS SEASON WE GOT HIT A 2ND TIME.

  ALL STAR GAME USED TO BE PLAYED FOR HOME ADVANTAGE IN THE WORLD SERIES. IT IS NOT ANYMORE. AMERICAN LEAGUE WINS AGAIN BUT IT WAS COOL WHEN THE NATIONAL LEAGUE TIED IT WITH A 2 RUN HOMER IN THE 9TH.

  I KNOW I PRONOUNCE " WATER " ......." WOULDER ". I AM TRYING TO FIX THAT.

  MOVING THE RABBIT IN AND OUT IS A SLIGHT HASSLE. TODAY BECAUSE OF THE RAIN WE HAD TO DO IT TWICE.

  WHEELS HEADS TO K.O.P. MALL FOR DINNER AND TO RETURN A BOOK TO A FRIEND. I MADE A HAMBURGER.

  ROLL TO THE NAIL TO PREP FOR THE NIGHT. AN INTERESTING NEW COUPLE CAME IN. THE GIRL IS ABSOLUTELY ADORABLE AND HAS SOME PERSONALITY TO SAY THE LEAST. SHE KNEW THE ENTIRE POOL TEAM AND THEY PLAYED JUKE BOX SONGS ALL NIGHT. SHE EVEN DID SOME DANCING ON THE FLOOR AND OTHER DANCE MOVES TO ENTERTAIN US. I LIKED HER AND SHE TIPPED AWESOME. SHE WORKS AT " TANGO " AND I SAID I COME VISIT HER.

  THE POOL TEAM ALSO TOLD ME ANOTHER BAR ( I WON'T SAY THE NAME ).  THE OWNER OF HANGOVER CARIBBEAN BAR IN HAVERTOWN ON WEST CHESTER PIKE ( AREA CODE 19087 ) TRY TO COERCE THE NAIL TEAM TO MOVE TO HIS BAR BY PROMISING THEM FULLY PAID DUES AND CHEAP APPETIZERS AND BEER. THIS WOULD BE ENTICING TO ANYONE ESPECIALLY WHEN THE CAPTAIN LIVES ACROSS THE STREET. JUST ONE PROBLEM........IN OVER ONE YEAR THE OWNER OF HANGOVER CARIBBEAN BAR IN HAVERTOWN ON WEST CHESTER PIKE ( AREA CODE 19087 - NEXT TO MCDONALDS ) HAS NOT PAID FOR ANY DUES FOR HIS TEAM YET AND THEIR PRICES ARE TWICE AS EXPENSIVE THAN THE NAIL. THE TEAM WAS PRETTY PISSED AND STAYED LOYAL.....UNLIKE A ANOTHER GITBAG TEAM WHEELS AND I PLAYED WITH FOR 15 FUCKING YEARS WHO LEFT US FOR A POOL HALL. FUCKING INGRATES.

  OH , LOOKS LIKE OUR POOL TEAM WILL SPLIT IN TWO BECAUSE OF TOO MANY PLAYERS AND WE WILL HAVE 2 NAIL TEAMS NEXT SEMESTER.  MAYBE THAT GOOD KARMA OF PUSHING A 3,000 POUND S.U.V HELPED.

 SPEAKING OF PUSHING A 3,000 POUND VEHICLE OVER A CURB.  I COPIED IN BOTH WHEELS AND MY YOUNGESTON THE FACEBOOK PICTURE AND STORY. OVER 100 FAMILY MEMBERS " LIKED " OR " COMMENTED " ON THE GOOD DEED......EXCEPT WHEELS AND MY YOUNGEST. I REMINDED MY YOUNGEST TWICE AND WHEELS ONCE TO AT THE VERY VERY LEAST GIVE ME A " LIKE. " THEY BOTH TEXTED BACK THAT I AM A LOSER. THEY WOULD BE CORRECT.

  LATE NIGHT I AM HURTING BIG TIME. I CLOSE UP AND HEAD HOME. THE SHEER JOY TO SIT IN MY CRAPPY VAN AND TAKE A LOAD OFF MY FEET IS BLISSFUL. I ALMOST FALL ASLEEP IN THE BACK LOT WHILE STARTING THE VEHICLE. AT HOME I MAKE ONE NIGHT CAP AND TRY TO WATCH AN EPISODE OF " LUKE CAGE ". I FALL ASLEEP ALMOST IMMEDIATELY.  

  I AM WALKING WITH SOME FRIENDS NAMED BIG B AND " E ". ALSO IS A FAMILY MEMBER NAMED " J ". WE HAVE THIS BIG GREAT DANE DOG WITH US WHILE WALKING ALONG A CREEK BED. ABOUT 10 YARDS AWAY THERE IS A FENCE WITH BARBED WIRE ON TOP. THE DOG SEES SOME KIND OF ANIMAL ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THE FENCE AND TAKES OFF AFTER IT. THE DOG JUMPS THE FENCE BUT CATCHES IT'S HIND LEFT ANKLE ON THE BARBED WIRE. THE DOG TEARS IT UP AND IT IS A SERIOUS INJURY. I TAKE OFF MY SHIRT AND WRAP THE DOG'S LEG. " J " SAYS HE WILL GO GET HIS CAR AND MEET US INSIDE THE GATE. THERE IS A GATE ALONG THE FENCE AND WE HURRY TO GET TO IT. WE ENTER AND IT IS A MENTAL HEALTH FACILITY. WE GET TO THE FRONT DOOR AND ASK AN ORDERLY FOR ASSISTANCE. THEY PATCH THE DOG UP AND ALL IS GOOD. PATIENTS WANDERING AROUND THE MAIN LOBBY AREA SEE THE DOG AND BEGIN PETTING AND KISSING THE DOG. THEY ASKED US WHAT HAPPENED TO ITS LEG. EVERYONE IS OVERJOYED WITH THE DOG.

  CONTINUED - " J "PULLS UP HIS CAR AND WE SAY GOODBYES TO THE PATIENTS AND WORKERS. WE HAVE 2 CARS NOW SO " J " AND " E " LEAVE IN HIS CAR WHILE WE FOLLOW IN BIG B'S CAR. WE HAVE THE DOG IN A CAR AND AS WE ARE LEAVING ALONG THE FENCE THERE IS A YOUNG CHEETAH. I GUESS THE CAR ENGINE SPOOKED THE CUB.  NOT 5 SECONDS LATER WE SEE A MOTHER CHEETAH POP OUT AND RUNS WITH HER CUB. I SAY TO BIG B , " MAN , SINCE WHEN DO WE HAVE CHEETAHS AROUND HERE ? " ....................dream ends.

  WEDNESDAY      7 - 18 - 18

  I RUN DAY AND NIGHT.......AND TONIGHT THE NAIL WAS APPRECIATED. IT FELT NICE.

  START MORNING OUT BY DRIVING TO RESTAURANT DEPOT WITH MY YOUNGEST. IT WAS ONE OF OUR FASTER RUNS AND AGAIN AN ABSOLUTE JOY TO SPEND TIME WITH MY KID.

  STOP AT MY PARENT'S HOUSE TO HAVE LUNCH.  I EXPLAIN TO MY YOUNGEST WHY I AM A NUDGE.  DAD'S PASTEENE IS AWESOME BUT GRILLED CHEESES WITH ONE SLICE OF CHEESE........NOT SO GOOD. HE'S ALMOST 90 AND HIS BIFOCALS MUST MAKE ONE SLICE OF CHEESE LOOK 6 INCHES THICK.

  STOP AT THE NAIL TO UNLOAD PRODUCT.

  BACK HOME WE UNLOAD FOOD AND SETTLE IN. I LAY DOWN AT 2:30PM AND SAY TO MYSELF , " OK , NOW I CAN REST FOR 3 HOURS AND HEAD TO THE NAIL. " I ALREADY PUT IN A FULL DAY SINCE 8AM. BUT THAN I FORGET.......I HAVE A SIDE JOB ESTIMATE TO GO TO......CRAP.  THE LADY NEVER CALLS MY CELL PHONE AND I GET A NEEDED POWER NAP.

  GET AN EMAIL BY MY SIDEJOB PERSON AND I MIXED 2 NUMBERS ON MY CELL PHONE. THIS IS WHY SHE DID NOT CALL. I ASK MY YOUNGEST TO COME WITH ME BECAUSE HAVING A FAT BALD GUY KNOCK AT YOUR DOOR IS INTIMIDATING AND SCARY. BUT....HAVING A CUTE GIRL WITH ME TAKES THE ANXIETY OUT. WE ARRIVE AT THE HOUSE AND IT IS BEAUTIFUL. THE BACK DECK LOOKS DOWN A LARGE HILL WITH TONS OF TREES. IT KINDA FEELS LIKE YOUR IN THE POCONOS. IT IS A REALLY COOL LOCATION. 

  BACK HOME I HAVE 30 MINUTES. WE HEAD TO THE SWIM CLUB AND IT IS GLORIOUS.

  BACK HOME AGAIN AND I RIDE MY VTX 1300 TO THE NAIL. THE BANDS ARE WAITING AND IT IS A GOOD FUN NIGHT. I ALLOW TWO OTHER MOTORCYCLE RIDERS TO PARK OUT FRONT. I TALK TO THEM ALL NIGHT. OH.....MY NEIGHBOR IS A DICK HEAD BUT I WON'T GET INTO HAT.

  HERE IS A FACEBOOK POST :

 LAST NIGHT - WHEN all 4 bands and every single band member thanks us for doing a thankless job and hosting a great show.....yeah , it felt nice to be appreciated in this extremely tough predominantly " original music " business.

 The College girls work tonight through Saturday !!  

  I WORK WITH MY ELDEST AND IT IS FUN. BACK HOME WE CHILL AND SHE DECIDES TO RETURN TO HER COLLEGE HOUSE AT 12:30AM. I COULD NOT CONVINCE HER TO STAY SO I ASKED TO TEXT ME WHEN SHE ARRIVED.

  MY YOUNGEST AND I HANG OUT WITH THE PUP AND IT IS ALWAYS SUPER REWARDING.  I WANT DOGS TO CONTROL THE WORLD.  EVERYONE WOULD BE HAPPY TO SEE EACH OTHER AS SOON AS YOU WALK IN THE DOOR AND SMELL EACH OTHER'S ASSES. THAT BE AWESOME. WE ROLL TO BED AROUND 2AM. MY LEGS ARE HURTING AND I SLEEP REALLY GOOD AGAIN UNTIL 6AM. I GO BACK TO SLEEP AND WAKE UP AT 8AM. THIS IS GOOD. 

  THURSDAY      7 - 19 - 18

  WHEN YOU KNOCK ON A FRONT DOOR AND GOD ANSWERS.................THE HOUSE IS PRETTY DARN IMPRESSIVE.

  UPSTAIRS IN MY OFFICE I PRINT OUT VISA SALES SLIPS FOR THE NAIL AND NEW MENU TABLE TOPS. OF COURSE MY YOUNGEST POINTS OUT OUR NEW FOOD ITEM IS MIS-SPELLED........" JALAPEÑO POPPERS ". I DID TRY THEM WITH MY ELDEST LAST NIGHT AND THEY ARE PRETTY GOOD.

  AGAIN , MY YOUNGEST TRAVELS WITH ME. AGAIN , NO ONE UNDERSTANDS HOW MUCH JOY THIS KID BRINGS TO ME. I MESS WITH HER BY SAYING , " DO YOU KNOW I LOVE JUST LOOKING AT YOU ? HAVE I EVER SAID THIS TO YOU BEFORE ? " THE KID GIGGLES AND GIVES ME THAT " NUDGE " LOOK ( I'VE SAID THIS 10,000 TIMES )

  WE STOP AT A BANK TO MAKE A DEPOSIT. MY YOUNGEST SAYS , " IS THIS MONEY FOR THE CONDO WORK ? " I REPLY , " NOPE , IT'S FOR MONTHLY BILLS. " HER RESPONSE , " WOW. "

  NEXT WE GO TO MY PARENT'S HOUSE FOR THE 2ND DAY IN A ROW. MY MOM BOUGHT ME A BATHING SUIT AND SHIRT. IT IS BRIGHT BLUE AND I BELIEVE THE MANUFACTURE IS " GARAMINALS ". I FEEL LIKE A BLUE WHALE. WE HAVE LUNCH WITH MY DAD AND HANG WITH HIM FOR ABOUT 45 MINUTES.

  NEXT TO THE NAIL............WE DID ALOT OF STUFF.  WEDNESDAY NIGHT I WEEDED OUT FRONT. YES , WHILE DOING THE DOOR I FIGURED IT IS NIGHT OUT , TEMPS ARE COOL , AND WHY THE HELL NOT.  BUT TODAY........WE DID MORE :

  - WEED WHACKED THE BACK PARKING LOT. YES , EVEN THOUGH IT IS BLACK TOPPED NOW THESE FRIGGIN' WEEDS STILL GROW.

  - WEED WHACKED THE FRONT AREA. LAST NIGHT I WEEDED ALONG OUR STEP AREA. TODAY I WHACKED WEEDS ALONG THE STREET CURB AND MIDDLE. IT LOOKS 10X BETTER.  MY YOUNGEST AND I BOTH LEAF BLEW THE CUT WEEDS ONTO OUR NEIGHBORS PROPERTY....THE MISERABLE FUCK.

  - CHANGE THE MARQUEE SIGN WITH HELP FROM MY YOUNGEST. SHE GRABS A LETTER FOR THE " AND " WORD AND I SAY , " HOW DID YOU KNOW WHERE THAT WAS IN THE LETTER BOX ? " SHE REPLIES , " DAD , I'VE BEEN DOING THIS A LONG TIME. " I JUST GIGGLE AND THAN HUG HER WHEN I GET OFF THE LADDER.

  - YOUNGEST CHANGES ALL TABLE TENTS WITH THE NEW MENUS. SHE ALSO CHANGES INSTRUCTIONS FOR COOKING AND WEIGHING FOOD.  WE ALSO WENT THROUGH WEIGHING OF EACH PRODUCT. BY TESTING EACH ONE.

  - I CHANGE THE OIL IN THE DEEP FRYER AND CLEAN IT WHILE MY YOUNGEST VACUUMS THE WHOLE PLACE.

  - I TAKE A RIDE TO THE BANK WHILE MY YOUNGEST PRINTS UP NEW FOOD ITEMS AND INSTRUCTIONS FOR THE BACK KITCHEN AREA.

  - SET UP P.A. SYSTEM FOR MUSICIANS. YOUNGEST CLEANS AND MOPS BATHROOMS.

  - I GO THROUGH OUR RAG BASKET AND THROW AWAY ABOUT HALF. WE ADDED ABOUT 90 BRAND NEW RAGS. MY YOUNGEST SAYS , " ABOUT TIME. " I RESPOND , " THERE'S THAT SASSINESS AGAIN. "

  - COUNT AND THROW OUT LIQUOR BOTTLES ALONG WITH ALL TRASH. WE PUT NEW LINERS IN ALL TRASHCANS.

  - DEFROSTED THE FREEZER. WE CARRIED IT OUTSIDE AND LET THE SUN MELT ALL THE BUILT UP ICE.  I HOSED THE INTERIOR OUT ALONG WITH WIPING IT DOWN. 

  BACK HOME WE MEET WHEELS. WE WALK THE DOG AND THAN LOAD UP. TIME TO SIT IN TRAFFIC.....AND SIT....AND SIT.....AND SIT.....AND SIT.....AND SIT.

  ALMOST 3 HOURS LATER WE ARRIVE AT A HOME THAT GOD BUILT. IT IS MIND BLOWING AND INCONCEIVABLE FOR A BLUE COLLAR GUY LIKE ME. THE HOUSE IS ON THE WATER , BOAT , POOL , ELEVATOR , INSIDE BARS , OUTSIDE TV , OUTSIDE LOUNGE AREAS , SPIRAL STEPS , 3RD FLOOR BALCONIES , MAGNIFICENT SUNSET , AND SO MUCH MORE IT IS JUST SPECTACULAR.  IT ACTUALLY GETS DEPRESSING SOMETIMES......THOUGH I TRY NOT TO THINK ABOUT THAT WHILE DRINKING SAM ADAMS , BRANDY ( YES I BROKE DOWN AND HAD 2 SHOTS ) , AND GIN & SODA WATER ( YES , I EXCHANGED TONIC FOR SODA WATER SINCE IT HAS SO MUCH SUGAR AND SALT ).

  WE SETTLE IN WITH SOME FAMILY. WE ORDER PIZZA AND PRIMO HOAGIES WHILE SOME FAMILY GO OUT TO DINNER. WE SIT OUTSIDE ON THE COVERED PORCH OVER LOOKING THE BAY AND LOTS OF SEA BIRDS. IT IS UNBELIEVABLE.

  WE DECIDE TO TAKE A TOUR OF A TOWN I HAVE NOT BEEN TO IN A LONG TIME. I LET A FAMILY MEMBER DRIVE SINCE HE KNOWS THE AREA.  HE IS THE MOST SAFEST DRIVER I HAVE EVER SEEN. I WILL NOT GET INTO BUT I COULD NOT OF GOT OUT OF THE CAR FAST ENOUGH.

  VISIT MY NIECE WORKING. THE YOUNG ADULT IS ADORABLE AND SHE WORKS IN AN ICE-CREAM SHOP. IT IS A GREAT IDEA. THE CUSTOMER MAKES IT THEMSELVES AND THAN BRINGS IT TO A REGISTER. MY NIECE WEIGHS IT AND THAN THEY PAY. WHAT A JOB. THEY EVEN HAVE A TIP JAR. I PAID $14 FOR 2 CUPS OF YOGURT MY YOUNGEST AND NEPHEW GOT. I TIPPED MY NIECE $7.  WE TALKED FOR ABOUT 20 MINUTES AND IT WAS REALLY NICE TO SEE HER.

  WE WALK AROUND AND GO BY A HIGH CLASS RESTAURANT THAT HAPPENS TO HAVE FAMILY IN THERE. I SAY , "I'M GOING TO OPEN THE FRONT DOOR AND SAY " HELLO ". WHEELS AND MY YOUNGEST TELL ME NOT TO AND TAKE OFF IN THE OTHER DIRECTION. I OPEN THE DOOR AND I SEE A FAMILY MEMBER. I YELL OUT HIS NAME 10 TIMES AND HE DOES NOT HEAR ME. I MEAN I AM YELLING FROM THE STREET WHILE HOLDING THE DOOR OPEN. WHEELS AND MY KID THINK I'M AN IDIOT. THERE IS A HUGE LINE OF PEOPLE WAITING FOR ICE CREAM AND THEY LOOK AT ME LIKE I'M AN IDIOT. I TURN TO THEM AND SAY ," THE PERSON I AM YELLING AT IS A LITTLE OLD AND HAS A HEARING PROBLEM. " PEOPLE GIGGLE IN LINE. FINALLY , THE 2 FAMILY MEMBERS COME TO THE FRONT DOOR AND GREET US. IT WAS PRETTY FUNNY.

  TAKE A 4 BLOCK WALK TO A 5 & 10 STORE. I PURCHASE SOME SUPER GLUE AND THAN I ASK MY KID , " WOULD YOU LIKE TO BUY A SHIRT ? " THIS WAS A MISTAKE BECAUSE THE PRICES HERE ARE 10X MORE EXPENSIVE THAN A WALMART OR KMART. SO FOR A $4 SHIRT I PAID $30. 

  BACK TO OUR CAR AND WE DRIVE TO AN ARCADE ALONG WITH TOURING THE AREA. IT IS A PICTURE PERFECT NIGHT AND THE WEATHER IS COOL.  AT THE ARCADE THEY ONLY ACCEPT CREDIT CARDS MADE BY THE ARCADE COMPANY. NO CASH , COINS , OR TOKENS. THIS IS A HORRIBLE WAY OF DOING THINGS ESPECIALLY WHEN YOU HAVE TO USE A COMPUTER SCREEN TO NAVIGATE GETTING  DEBIT STYLE CARDS FROM THEM. HOW THESE ARCADE COMPANIES STAY IN BUSINESS I WILL NEVER KNOW.........NO ONE WAS THERE.

  BACK HOME WE CHILL WITH SOME DRINKS. IT IS A BEAUTIFUL EVENING AND THE STARS ARE OUT. I JOIN MY YOUNGEST AND NEPHEW IN THE POOL. I HAVE DRINKS ON THE SIDE AND MY NIECE JOINS US WHEN SHE CAME HOME FROM WORK. WE TALKED FOR A LITTLE OVER AN HOUR. I ENJOYED EVERY SECOND.

  OUT OF THE POOL AND INSIDE WE WATCH TV FOR ABOUT AN HOUR. ONE MORE NIGHTCAP AND IT IS OFF TO BED.

  FRIDAY        7 - 20 - 18

  LEGALLY BLONDE................AND SOME FISHING. I WILL POST FACEBOOK PICTURES SOON.

  LAST ONE TO BED , FIRST ONE UP.......STORY OF MY LIFE.

  AFTER DOING MY NORMAL ROUTINES OF WEBSITE AND BLOGGING I TOOK MY YOUNGEST AND NIECE TO BREAKFAST. WE WENT TO A VERY NICE LITTLE PLACE OFF THE MAIN STREET..........YOUNG PEOPLE , SOME PUPPIES , BENCHES WITH UMBRELLAS , AND A QUAINT TINY AREA.  THIS WAS A HEALTH PLACE CALLED " SURF SNACK SHACK ". WE LET OUR NIECE ORDER FOR US BECAUSE SHE HAS BEEN HERE SEVERAL TIMES. WE ORDER 3 GELATO / SMOOTHIE STYLE FRUIT BOWLS. WELL , BOWL IS MORE LIKE A CUP.  THAN WE ADDED AVOCADO WITH WONDERFUL SPICES ON WHEAT TOAST , AND 2 VITAMIN WATERS.  THE FOOD WAS DIFFERENT , HEALTHY , COLORFUL , AND ACTUALLY TASTED VERY GOOD.  BUT..........THERE IS ONE PROBLEM. I ACTUALLY HAD TO ASK THE GIRL AT THE REGISTER TWICE. I THOUGHT THE WATER IN MY EAR WAS GIVING ME MISINFORMATION.  AFTER A 3RD TIME THE GIRL SAID , " THAT WILL BE $62 PLEASE. " I STARTED ADDING OUR FOOD ITEMS UP VIA THEIR MENU.  $9 FOR EACH OF THE FRUIT SALADS WHICH IS $27. THAN TOAST AND 2 WATERS BRING IT TO $62 ?  WELP , APPARENTLY IT DID. I WOULD RECOMMEND GOING TO THIS PLACE BUT ONLY ONCE EVERY YEAR OR TWO OR THREE.  I COULDN'T BELIEVE IT. I WALK OUT AND SEE A SIGN NEXT DOOR , " $3 BREAKFAST SANDWICHES - MAKE THEM ANY WAY YOU LIKE."

   MY NIECE DRIVES US AROUND AND SHOWS US DIFFERENT THINGS. THE ONLY THING THAT SUCKS IS SHE IS DRIVING BACK HOME TODAY.

   BACK HOME WE CHILL AND I FIX MY CELL PHONE HOLDER WITH THE SUPER GLUE I BOUGHT YESTERDAY.

  WE LOAD UP AND HEAD OUT ON THE SEA. YEP.......FISHING. WHEELS CATCHES THE MOST AND I JUST CHILLED AND ENJOYED THE BEAUTIFUL DAY ON THE WATER AND MAGNIFICENT HOMES ALONG THE BAY. MANY OTHER WATER ENTHUSIASTS WERE OUT TOO.  TO ME , HANGING WITH MY YOUNGEST WAS THE BEST PART. I EVEN ASKED THE KID , " SINCE YOUR COUSIN IS HEADING HOME , DID YOU WANT TO GO HOME TOO ? " I WAS OVERJOYED TO HEAR SHE WANTED TO STAY ANYWAY.

  BACK HOME THE GIRLS SIT IN A HUGE BLOW UP COUCH IN A POOL WHILE SIPPING DRINKS. IT LOOKED QUITE RELAXING. I HAVE SOME LEFTOVER PRIMO'S WITH MY YOUNGEST BEFORE HEADING OUT.  WE WERE GETTING SOME ALONE TIME WHICH WAS VERY NICE.

  MEET UP WITH FAMILY IN O.C. AND HEAD TO THE BOARDWALK.  WE ENTER A LARGE AREA FOR A THEATRE BUT THERE WAS ONE PROBLEM.....A FIRE ALARM WAS SET OFF. ALL THE ACTORS WERE OUTSIDE WHILE PEOPLE WAITED TO ENTER. BUT AFTER A SHORT WAIT THEY GAVE THE OKAY TO TAKE OUR SEATS.

  WE WERE THERE TO SEE THE THEATRE PRODUCTION OF THE FAMOUS MOVIE " LEGALLY BLONDE ". THE MAIN REASON TO SEE THIS SHOW WAS BECAUSE OUR NIECE PLAYED THE LEAD ROLE. 

  HERE IS MY INTERPRETATION :

  - SO , WHAT IS LEGALLY BLONDE ABOUT ? IN A NUT SHELL , A BOY BREAKS UP WITH A GIRL TO GO TO HARVARD UNIVERSITY TO GAIN IN HIS CAREER. SHE IS CRUSHED AND SEEKS A PLOT TO RETRIEVE HIS LOVE BACK BY GOING TO THE SAME SCHOOL. SHE IS BROUGHT UP ON THE MATERIAL THINGS IN LIFE BUT QUICKLY REALIZES LIFE , HONOR , AND PEOPLE MEAN MORE. SHE DEVELOPS FRIENDS AND CONFIDENCE TO SOARING LEVELS. THE TIDE TURNS ON HER MISTREATMENT AS A " CLOTHING FIRST " KIND OF LIFE STYLE PERSON WHEN SHE EXCELS AT HARVARD UNIVERSITY AND SHINES AS A YOUNG APPRENTICE ATTORNEY IN A COURT CASE. SHE STICKS TO HER GUNS WITH HONOR AND THE STORY LINE BECOMES APPARENT.........LIFE IS MORE THAN MATERIAL THINGS AND EMPTY RELATIONSHIPS. TRUE LOVE WILL WIN AND TRUE FRIENDSHIPS WILL BE EARNED AND APPRECIATED FOR A LIFETIME.

  - I TRY NOT TO BE BIAS ON MY OPINION OR ANALYSIS OF THIS PRODUCTION. I MEAN MY NIECE IS THE LEAD CHARACTER AND IN EVERY SCENE PRACTICALLY.  I ALSO THOUGHT , " OKAY , LEGALLY BLONDE IS A CHICK FLICK BUT I WILL GIVE IT A SHOT ".

 - SEVERAL THINGS AFFECT MY REVIEW OF THEATRE PRESENTATIONS. FIRST , DID THE ACTORS PORTRAY AND TELL THE STORY TO " MOVE " AND ESTABLISH THE AUDIENCE ?  THE ANSWER HERE IS YES. HOW DID I CONCLUDE THIS ?....BY AUDIENCE AND MY OWN PERSONAL REACTIONS. IF SOMETHING WAS HAPPY OR FUNNY DURING THE SHOW........THE AUDIENCE LAUGHED. THIS IS USUALLY MUCH EASIER THAN MAKING PEOPLE FEEL SAD. WELL , THESE 16 - 20 YEAR OLD KIDS MADE US FEEL FOR THEIR CHARACTERS. ON SOME SAD SCENES , THE AUDIENCE MEMBERS ACTUALLY SIGHED. I MEAN THEY KNOW THIS IS FICTITIOUS BUT THEY WERE DRAWN INTO THE CHARACTERS ON STAGE AND WHAT THEY WERE GOING THROUGH. THIS IS A REMARKABLE ACHIEVEMENT AND TRANSPORTATION FROM SUCH YOUNG ACTORS WAS QUITE IMPRESSIVE.

  - EVERY KID IN THIS PLAY DID A FANTASTIC JOB. YOU COULD FEEL THERE WAS A BOND BETWEEN THE ACTORS WHO PUT THIS SHOW TOGETHER IN JUST 4 WEEKS.  THE GENERAL KINSHIP COULD BE FELT ON AND OFF THE STAGE.

  - BY THE END OF THE FIRST SONG I HAD 3 FAVORITE ACTORS. LITTLE DID I KNOW ONE FAVORITE HAD A BIG ROLE IN THE 2ND ACT. I EVEN WENT UP TO HER AFTER THE SHOW AND TOLD HER AND MOM & DAD , " YOU WERE ONE OF MY FAVORITES AFTER THE FIRST SONG. I DID NOT KNOW YOU HAD SUCH A BIG PART IN THE 2ND ACT. " HERE EYES GLOWED WITH APPRECIATION AND THANKED ME SEVERAL TIMES. THE DAD LOOKED AT ME LIKE GET THE HELL AWAY FROM MY DAUGHTER FAT BLUE WHALE. ( I WAS WEARING A VERY BLUE SHIRT )

  - DELIGHTFUL ACTORS WITH SMALLER AND BIGGER PARTS " STOLE "  SCENES WONDERFULLY. FROM A U.P.S. GUY CARRYING A BOX TO 2 GAY GUYS COMING OUT TO 2 LITTLE DOGS AND TO A HAIR DRESSER WHO ABSOLUTELY DOES A FANTASTIC JOB. AGAIN , THESE YOUNG KIDS , WHICH KEPT GOING THROUGH MY MIND , MOVED THE ENTIRE AUDIENCE EMOTIONALLY. THEY MADE US FEEL GOOD AND SOMBER DURING THE STORY TELLING. THE WHOLE PRODUCTION WAS EXCELLENT.  A STANDING OVATION AT THE END WAS WELL DESERVED FOR THESE HARD WORKING YOUNG ACTORS.

  - THE LAST REVIEW IS MY NIECE WHO PLAYS THE LEAD ROLE " THE BLONDE ".  THIS KID HAS GROWN UP IN FRONT OF MY EYES. AS I SAT WITH MY YOUNGEST ( WHO IS THE SAME AGE AS HER COUSIN ) AND MADE POSITIVE COMMENTS DURING THE PLAY ABOUT HER COUSIN WHO SINGS , DANCES , AND ACTS THROUGH THE ENTIRE SHOW.  I TOLD MYSELF I AM GOING TO LOOK AT THIS SHOW OBJECTIVELY AND JUST HAVE FUN WITH IT. I WILL NOT BE CRITICAL OF THESE YOUNG ACTORS AT ALL. WELL , I WAS PLEASANTLY SURPRISED BECAUSE THERE WERE NO DOWN FALLS OF THIS ENTIRE PRODUCTION ESPECIALLY MY FAMILY MEMBER UP ON THE STAGE. THIS KID WAS NOTHING SHORT OF PHENOMENAL.  LEARNING ALL DANCES AND SONGS WHILE ACTING IS A TOUGH ENOUGH TASK.   TO SHOW EMOTION AND MOVE THE AUDIENCE COMPASSIONATELY THROUGHOUT THE ACTOR'S TRIALS AND TRIBULATIONS OF SCHOOL , RELATIONSHIPS , AND HARDSHIPS WAS NOTHING SHORT OF REMARKABLE. I COULD NOT BELIEVE HOW THIS KID ( IN MY EYES ) ACHIEVED SUCH A BALANCE OF HUMAN NATURE TO HUMAN EMOTION TO STAGE PERFORMANCE. SHE ( AND THE ENTIRE CAST ) WAS FUN TO WATCH AND TOOK A FAT OLD GUY LIKE ME AWAY FROM REALITY FOR A SHORT PERIOD OF TIME. TO ME , THAT IS THE ULTIMATE GOAL OF AN ACTOR. THEY CREATED THIS GLORIOUS FICTITIOUS WORLD FOR US AND WE SOAKED IT IN.

  ALL OF US TOOK PICTURES ON THE BOARDWALK WITH THE MARQUEE SIGN OF " LEGALLY BLONDE " IN LIGHTS AND WITH FAMILY...........THAN WE GOT ICE CREAM. HEY........KIDS ARE STILL KIDS.

 BACK TO A FAMILY MEMBER'S HOUSE WHERE WE TALKED , HAD SNACKS , AND DRANK I.P.A. BEERS. ANOTHER THING WHEN YOU KNOW YOU'RE HAVING A GOOD TIME......IS TIME. I COULD NOT BELIEVE IT WAS PRACTICALLY 1AM WHEN WE LEFT. MY YOUNGEST AND I DRIVE BACK HOME AND TALK ABOUT THE EXPERIENCE AND HOW HER COUSIN DID SUCH A FANTASTIC JOB.

  WHEELS WAITS FOR US AND I HAVE A NIGHT CAP WITH HER. I HAVE A GLASS OF WINE AND ONE BRANDY ( WHICH I DID NOT WANT BUT WHAT THE HECK ).  I WILL WEAN THIS SUGARY PRODUCT OUT OF MY LIFE SOON.

   SATURDAY      7 - 21 - 18

  AND THAN THE RAIN CAME.

  TODAY WAS CHILL DAY AND EAT & DRINK.  WE WATCHED A MOVIE CALLED " BAYWATCH ". IT STARRED " THE ROCK " AND I WAS COMPLETELY SURPRISED THAT THIS MOVIE WAS ACTUALLY FUNNY.  NOW , YOU MUST TAKE IT WITH A GRAIN OF SALT AND SILLINESS BUT IT WAS ENTERTAINING. I WOULD NOT RECOMMEND GOING TO THE THEATRE OR EVEN BUYING IT WITH ON-DEMAND FOR 5 BUCKS........BUT FREE ON " EPIX " MOVIE CHANNEL WAS WORTH IT.

  FOR LUNCH WHEELS AND I TREATED EVERYONE WITH ITALIAN HOAGIES. THE FOOD WAS GOOD.

  WE WATCH THE RAIN AND CHILLED LISTENING TO MUSIC AND TELLING OLD STORIES. THE STORY TELLING WAS MY FAVORITE ESPECIALLY WHEN MORE FAMILY CAME IN.

  ONE STORY : MY FATHER-IN-LAW WAS A VERY WELL KNOWN ANTIQUE COLLECTOR. A PERSON YOU MIGHT OF HEARD OF NAMED JOHN du PONT INVITED HIM OVER TO BUY SOME 19TH CENTURY DUELING PISTOLS FROM IRELAND.  THEY STARTING TALKING AND MR. DuPONT ASKED IS HE SHOT POOL ? WELL , THIS IS WERE THE STORY GETS GOOD BECAUSE HE SAYS TO MY FATHER-IN-LAW , " IF I WIN I GET THE PISTOLS , IF YOU WIN YOU CAN PICK ANYTHING ON THE WALLS OF MY HOUSE. YOU CAN IMAGINE WHAT WAS ON THE WALLS OF THIS BILLIONAIRE WHO OWNED 100'S OF ACRES IN OUR AREA. WELL , MY FATHER-IN-LAW WINS AND HE PICKED A 5 FOOT LONG WALRUS TUSK WITH SCRIMSHAW ART COMPLETELY COVERING IT.  YEARS LATER IT WOULD SELL FOR 20 GRAND.

  FOR DINNER A FAMILY MEMBER TREATS 8 OF US WITH LOBSTER DINNERS.  YEP....LOBSTER.  EACH OF US GOT " LARGE " TINS " OF 1 1/2 POUND LOBSTERS WITH LITTLE NECK CLAMS AND CORN ON THE COB.  EVERYTHING WAS VERY GOOD.

  8 OF US PLAY A BOARD GAME CALLED " APPLES TO APPLES ".  WE LAUGHED PRETTY MUCH FOR 2 HOURS OR MORE. I GOT TEAMED WITH MY YOUNGEST WHICH WAS THE REAL TREAT FOR ME.  THIS GAME IS KINDA FUN AND REALLY GIVE YOU INSIGHT ON HOW PEOPLE THINK. YOU MAY THINK ONE ANSWER IS ABSOLUTELY LOGICAL AND ANOTHER PERSON PICKS AN ANSWER COMPLETELY OPPOSITE OF IT.  IT REALLY SHOWS ME THE " AMERICANA " OF OUR LITTLE WORLD WE LIVE IN.

  LATE NIGHT WE ORDER PIZZA AND WINGS. THE BOOZE IS STILL FLOWING AND I TRY TO STICK TO GIN & SODA WATER WITH A LIME ALL NIGHT. THAN WHEELS BRINGS ME A SHOT OF BRANDY. IT WAS WELCOMED SO I DID IT. I HAVE MAJORLY CUT DOWN ON BRANDY SO THIS WAS OKAY.

  OUTSIDE ON THE PORCH OVERLOOKING TH EBAY WE ROLL UP THE HURRICANE WINDOWS BECAUSE THE WINDS AND RAIN HAVE STOPPED.  YEP........THEY HAVE HURRICANE SHUTTERS HERE. WITH THEIR OUTSIDE TV WE WATCH SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE WHICH WAS PRETTY FUNNY.

  BY 12:30AM I HAD TOO MUCH FOOD AND BOOZE. IT WAS OFF TO BED. I SLEPT GOOD UNTIL 6AM.

  I AM WITH MY BROTHERS AND A COUSIN. WE ARE WATCHING A BASEBALL GAME AND IN THE DUGOUT WE HEAR ONE PLAYER SCREAMING AT ANOTHER PLAYER.  IT WAS FRANK THOMAS AKA " THE BIG HURT " YELLING AT A ROOKIE. FRANK HAS BEEN IN A SLUMP FOR 2 MONTHS AND HE IS IN HIS LAST YEAR OF A CONTRACT. HE KNOWS THE END IS NEAR.  I YELL AT HIM FOR YELLING AT THE ROOKIE AND HE GETS PISSED. HE STICKS HIS HEAD OUT OF THE DUGOUT AND WALKS TO THE END WHERE WE ARE.  HE GIVES ME A SPEECH ABOUT " WHO THE HELL AM I " AND I TAKE IT. I SAY TO HIM , " THINK ABOUT WHEN YOU WERE A ROOKIE. YOU'RE BLAMING THIS KID FOR YOUR BAD SEASON. STOP BLAMING OTHERS AND GET OFF YOUR ASS AND PLAY THE GAME THE RIGHT WAY. TAKE THE ANGER OUT ON THE GAME AND NOT PEOPLE. " HIS ANGRY DEMEANOR COMPLETELY CHANGES. HE SAYS TO ME , " YOU KNOW , YOU'RE RIGHT. " AND JUST WALKS BACK TO THE DUGOUT.  WE WATCH THE GAME AND FRANK THOMAS GOES 4 FOR 5 WITH 2 HOMERUNS.  HIS LAST AT BAT HE HITS HIS 2ND HOMERUN OF THE GAME. HE ROUNDS THE BASES AND BEGINS SLOWLY JOGGING BACK TO THE DUGOUT. RIGHT BEFORE HE ENTERS THE DUGOUT HE POINTS TO ME AND OUR GROUP AND POUNDS HIS CHEST TWICE AND POINTS AGAIN TO US. MY BROTHERS , COUSIN , AND ME ALL YELL , " OH MY GOD !!! "  HE GIVES US A BIG SMILE AND WE CHEER HIM BACK...............dream ends.

  SUNDAY      7 - 22 - 18

  " MY FRIENDS THINK YOU ARE FUNNY. ".......THAT'S ALL I CAN ASK.

    FOOD AND BOOZE........UGH. MY COUSIN BUYS BREAKFAST FOR EVERYONE.  A NEW PLACE I HAVE NEVER TRIED CALLED " DUCK DONUTS ".  OH........MY.........GOD.  BREAKFAST SANDWICHES ON A DONUT.  IT WAS A RELIGIOUS EXPERIENCE.  THANK YOU GOD.

  6 OF US TAKE AN HOUR WALK AROUND THIS BEAUTIFUL DEVELOPMENT.  EVERY HOME IS DIFFERENT AND EVERY HOME IS WORTH OVER 5 MILLION DOLLARS.  IT ACTUALLY GETS DEPRESSING KNOWING SO MANY PEOPLE HAVE SO MUCH MONEY.

  BACK HOME TO UTILIZE THE GOOD WEATHER. ALL OF US TAKE A WONDERFUL BOAT RIDE FOR ALMOST 2 HOURS. WE TRIED FISHING FOR JUST 10 MINUTES BUT THE WEATHER WOULD CHANGE THAT.  MY BROTHER-IN-LAW READS HIS CELL PHONE WITH A WEATHER MAP LIKE INDIANS TRACK BUFFALO. HE SAYS , " ALL FISHING RODS IN , WE HAVE TO GET BACK. "  WE ROAR BACK TO OUR PIER AND HIS HOUSE. WE PASS MANY BOATERS AND WITHIN 15 MINUTES OF BEING HOME.............WICKED RAIN COMES.  THAT IS READING A WEATHER CHART.

  I ENTER THE POOL WITH THE KIDS. I FLIP OVER A EXTREMELY LARGE COUCH-LIKE FLOTATION DEVICE. THE KIDS AND I USE IT TO GO UNDER AND NOT GET HIM BY THE RAIN. IT WAS ACTUALLY KINDA COOL. I SO ENJOYED BEING WITH MY NIECE AND YOUNGEST.

  WHEELS AND MY COUSIN GO SHOPPING FOR BURGERS AND DOGS. A SIMPLE QUICK VISIT TO THE MARKET FOR A SIMPLE QUICK BBQ.  WELP......THE BBQ TURNED INTO A FULL BLOWN OUT DINNER.  MY COUSIN IS AN EXCELLENT COOK. BESIDES BURGERS AND DOGS HE GRILLED SHRIMP WITH OLD BAY , GRILLED PINEAPPLE ( VERY SURPRISED HOW GOOD THIS WAS ) , GRILLED ONIONS , TOMATOES , CHEESE , CORN , AND FRESH CRABS CAUGHT RIGHT OFF THE DOCK 3 HOURS AGO ( IN WHICH WE FORGOT TO EAT ).  THIS WAS AN EXCELLENT BBQ.

  WIND DOWN AND I WATCH AN EXCELLENT DOCUMENTARY ON NFL NETWORKS ABOUT OUR PHILADELPHIA EAGLES. I CAN'T GET ENOUGH OF THIS SUPERBOWL WIN. IN FACT , AFTER THE DOCUMENTARY WE WATCHED THE REPLAY OF THE GAME. WE ALSO FLIPPED BACK AND FORTH WITH THE PHILLIES WHO SPLIT A DOUBLE HEADER WITH THE PADRES AND TOOK THE SERIES 2 - 1.

  WHEELS AND SOME COUSINS GO TO NORTH WILDWOOD TO " KEENANS " TO SEE THE BAND " CHICO'S VIBE." I STAYED BACK AND LET THEM ENJOY IT SINCE THE LEAD SINGER THINKS I'M A DOUCHE AND LOVES WHEELS.

  I TAKE THE KIDS FOR YOGURT. MY NIECE WORKS THERE SO WE VISITED HER AGAIN. I BUY YOGURT FOR THE KIDS AND TIP THEM OUT. MY NIECE AND CO-WORKERS SAY , " THAT IS THE BIGGEST TIP OF THE DAY. "  MY NIECE AND HER CO-WORKERS ARE ALL ADORABLE FEMALE COLLEGE STUDENTS. THERE IS A LARGE TV THAT SHOWS PICTURES OF PAST CUSTOMERS WHO VISITED THIS ESTABLISHMENT.  I ASK ALL THE FEMALE WORKERS , " SO , HOW DO WE GET ON THIS TV ? " THEY TELL ME WE NEED TO TAKE A PICTURE AND THAN SEND IT TO THEIR BOSS WHO WILL UPLOAD IT TO THE WEBSITE. SO I ASK ALL THE FEMALE COLLEGE GIRLS IN THE STORE ALONG WITH MY YOUNGEST AND ME TO TAKE A PICTURE. THEY ARE ALL GIGGLING AS I ORGANIZE THIS LITTLE PHOTO. THE PICTURE IS TAKEN WITH ALL OF US POINTING TO THE TV MONITOR. IT WAS MY WAY OF TELLING THE OWNER WE WANT TO BE ON THE PICTURE SCREEN ROTATION.

  THE KIDS FINISH THEIR ICE CREAM AND WE LEAVE. LATER THAT NIGHT WHEN MY NIECE RETURNED HOME FROM WORK SHE SAID , " ALL MY WORK FRIENDS SAID YOU WERE SO FUNNY. " YEP , I GET ALONG BETTER WITH KIDS THAN ADULTS.

  I TAKE MY YOUNGEST AND NEPHEW MINIATURE GOLFING. THE PLACE WAS VERY CROWDED AND FUN. MY YOUNGEST SAID SHE HAD A VERY GOOD TIME. WE TIMED IT PERFECTLY.  SINCE IT WAS LATE ALL THE GROUPS WERE IN FRONT OF US. SO INSTEAD OF STANDING IN LINE LIKE WILDEBEEST I HAD THE KIDS REPLAY EACH HOLE 2 , 3, AND SOMETIMES 4 TIMES SINCE NO ONE WAS BEHIND US. BASICALLY , THEY GOT TO PLAY THE WHOLE COURSE 3 TIMES OR MORE. FOR THE PRICE THEY CHARGE I WAS GLAD WE GOT OUR MONEYS WORTH. I EVEN SAID YOU CAN TAKE THE BEST SCORE OUT OF 2 TRIES. I ALSO PLAYED WITH THE WORKERS THERE WHO ONCE AGAIN WERE FEMALE COLLEGE STUDENTS. AT ONE HOLE WE PASS THE OFFICE WINDOW. TWO GIRLS INSIDE ARE TALKING AND I PUT MY HEAD IN SLIGHTLY AND SAY , " EXCUSE ME , CAN I ORDER 2 FRENCH FRIES AND 2 MILK SHAKES PLEASE ? " BOTH GIRLS COMPLETELY PLAYED ALONG. ONE INSTANTLY REPLIES , " OH , I'M SORRY SIR , WE JUST STOP COOKING ORDERS 30 MINUTES AGO. " THE OTHER GIRL , WHO IS AN ABSOLUTELY ADORABLE BLONDE SAYS , " DOWN THE STREET THERE IS A FOOD MARKET , COULD YOU GET ME A BURGER AND FRIES ? " THEY BOTH GIGGLE.

  BACK HOME AND WHEELS ARRIVES. ALL OF US CHILL AND WATCH TV. I TALK MOSTLY WITH MY YOUNGEST AND NIECE.  I DO NOT GET TO SEE MY NIECE VERY OFTEN SO I ASK QUESTIONS TO HER....AND MY KID TOO. WE WATCH " FRIENDS " AND THIS SHOW WAS ACTUALLY PRETTY GOOD......UNTIL THEY ALL WANTED A MILLION DOLLARS PER EPISODE. IT DID RUN 10 SEASONS.

  OFF TO BED AND THIS WAS ANOTHER GREAT DAY OF EATING TOO MUCH. I WAS PRETTY GOOD WITH DRINKING THOUGH.....NO BRANDY.

   MONDAY     7 - 23 - 18

  I ACTUALLY GET SICK TO MY STOMACH WHEN BANDS CANCEL OR NOT COMMUNICATE. FOR THE 1ST TIME IN 21 YEARS 5 BANDS CANCELLED ALL WITHIN 48 HOURS OF TODAY.  SATURDAY NIGHT WAS GOING TO BE BIG AND NOW I THINK I JUST MIGHT CLOSE. WELCOME BACK CHRIS......WELCOME FUCKING BACK.

  OH , ONE MORE THING , A MOUNTAIN HOUSE RENTER CRACKED OUR STOVE COOKTOP.........$600 TO REPLACE........NICE.

  AVALON YOU FREE ME. THANKS FOR THE MEMORIES.  YOU MAY HAVE SEEN THIS QUOTE AND PICTURE ON FACEBOOK WITH MY ASS HANGING OUT IN THE FRONT OF A BOAT. I LIKE TO THANK MANY OF YOU WHO COMPLIMENTED MY BUTT STILL LOOKING GOOD AFTER ALL THESE YEARS.  OUR FRIEND THE ELECTRICIAN M. H. HAD THE BEST QUOTE.

  START MORNING OUT WITH " DUCK DONUTS " WITH BREAKFAST SANDWICHES.  JESUS , THESE ARE DEADLY TO A FAT GUY.

  4 OF US TAKE A GOLF CART RIDE TO THE BEACH.  ONE FOLLOWED IN A CAR. YES.......A GOLF CART PEOPLE.  WE WALKED THE BEACHES OF AVALON AND IT WAS BEAUTIFUL. OCEAN TEMP WAS NICE.  AFTER ALMOST AN HOUR WE HEADED BACK HOME.

  LOADED UP AND HEADED HOME. I-95 HAD SEVERAL EXITS AND RAMPS CLOSED FOR SOME REASON. WE FOUND OUT LATER IT WAS VICE PRESIDENT PENCE.  REALLY ?  WE NEED TO CLOSE A HIGHWAY BECAUSE OF HIM ?

  BACK HOME WE UNLOAD AND ARE GREETED BY A CRYING DOG.  THIS DOG AMAZES US EVERY DAY.

  I AM EXHAUSTED AND NEED A NAP. I WATCH AN EPISODE OF " LUKE CAGE " AND FALL ASLEEP MOSTLY THROUGH IT.

  WHEELS AND YOUNGEST ENJOY FRESH BLUE CLAW CRABS WHILE I HAVE CHICKEN SALAD ON A PAPER PLATE.

  OFF TO THE NAIL TO CATCH UP ON THE LAST 5 DAYS. IT SO SUCKS WHEN THE REGISTER TAPE READS ONE HUGE NUMBER AND THAN THE MONEY COUNTS ANOTHER.......BLOW.

  ONE OF THE HORNIEST COUPLES COMES IN AND SHOOTS POOL FOR 2 HOURS. WELL , THAT WAS THE EXCUSE TO GROPE EACH OTHER. THE GIRL HAD A BANGING BODY AND EVERY SHOT SHE WOULD BEND OVER PAST A 90 DEGREE ANGLE. I MEAN HER HEAD WAS ALMOST HITTING THE GROUND EVERY DAMN SHOT. OF COURSE , THE GUY WOULD POKE HER WITH HIS POOL STICK , HAND , OR COCK ( THROUGH HIS PANTS ) EVERY TIME. IT GOT TO THE POINT WHERE IT ACTUALLY BECAME ANNOYING. BELIEVE ME , I LOVE WHEN SUPER BODIED WOMEN BEND OVER AND THROW THEIR ASS AROUND , BUT AFTER 2 HOURS EVEN I SAID ENOUGH IS ENOUGH.

  BY 9:45PM I COULD NOT GO ANYMORE. I DECIDED TO WRAP IT UP AND GET HOME.

  YOUNGEST ASKS FOR MCDONALDS AND I HAVE TO SAY " YES ".  MY RULE IS , " IF YOU GET STRAIGHT A'S IN SCHOOL , I ALWAYS SAY YES. " WE DROVE TO MCDONALDS.

  CHASE UTLEY RETURNS AND I ABSOLUTELY KNEW THE DODGERS WOULD WIN IN THE 9TH INNING.  THAN , " THE PHILADELPHIA SUCK IN ". THIS HAS HAPPENED TO US PHILLY FANS FOR DECADES. PHILLIES DOWN 7 - 5 IN THE BOTTOM OF THE 9TH INNING. FRANCO HITS A HOMERUN OFF THE FIRST PITCH. OK , ITS 7 - 6 NOW. MAYBE THE PHILLIES WILL MAKE A COMEBACK.  WELL , KEYWORD IS " PHILLY ". IT REALLY DOESN'T HAPPEN THAT MUCH AS WE KNOW WAY TO WELL. STRIKE OUT , STRIKE OUT , STRIKE OUT .....TO END THE GAME........BLOW......SUCKED US IN AGAIN.

  OFF TO BED BY 11PM.  I WAS SO DAMN TIRED.

   TUESDAY      7 - 24 - 18

  LONGER INNINGS AND RAIN.........I GOT NO PROBLEM WITH THAT.

  OH , ALWAYS SAY " YES. "

  START MY DAY WITH SOMETHING BOTHERING ME ALREADY...........WEEDS.  YEP , AFTER JUST A COUPLE OF WEEKS , SOME WEED SPRAYING , AND A LITTLE WEEDING THE UNKILLABLE PLANTS ARE BACK. SO , USING THE OVERCAST CLOUDS , SOME SLIGHTLY RAIN , AND SOME SUN IT WAS TIME TO DO SOMETHING. I HAD THE MANPOWER. ME , THE KIDS , AND THE PUP HEAD OUTSIDE WITH 5 TRASHCANS , HEDGE CLIPPER , TREE LIMB SNIPS , 100' EXTENSION CORD , GLOVES , RAKE , AND A RADIO.  I CUT ALL BRANCHES AND LIMBS ALONG THE PERIMETER OF THE BACK YARD THAT WERE HANGING OVER OUR FENCE. THAN , WE MOVE TO THE FRONT YARD TO WEED 4 GARDENS. IN UNDER 2 HOURS WE HAD IT ALL DONE.

  WHEELS CALLS ME , " WE GOT INVITED TO PHILLIES GAME TONIGHT. DO YOU WANT TO GO ? " I STARTED THINKING ABOUT ALL THE STUFF I NEEDED TO DO AND SHE SAYS , " REMEMBER WE ALWAYS SAY ' YES ' TO THESE INVITES. " SHE WAS RIGHT AND I SAID YES.

  SHOWER AND SHAVE AND GET WEEDS AND DIRT OFF ME. WE PICK UP A FAMILY MEMBER AND HEAD TO THE STADIUM.  WE GET THE V.I.P. TREATMENT AND I WON'T GET INTO BECAUSE I HAVE TOLD THIS STORY COUNTLESS TIMES. IT IS ALMOST DEPRESSING HOW RICH PEOPLE GET TREATED. QUICK STORY - WHEELS AND A FAMILY MEMBER WENT TO SHOP FOR A PHILLIES BLANKET BETWEEN INNINGS. ONE STORE DID NOT HAVE IT SO THEY CALLED THE OTHER STORE ON THE FIRST LEVEL. WHEN WHEELS AND THE FAMILY MEMBER ARRIVED 5 PEOPLE WERE WAITING FOR THEM.......MAN IT MUST BE NICE. OH , WE SAW MICKEY MORANDINI BY THE ELEVATORS.

 THE GAME WAS SLOW MOVING AND WE ARE LOSING 4 - 1. I ACTUALLY WAS FALLING ASLEEP. THAN , PHILLIES FIGHT BACK AND WE ARE THINKING , " OK COOL.....HOPE WE CAN STEAL A GAME THE DODGERS STOLE FROM US LAST NIGHT. "  WELL , IN THE 16TH INNING OUR BACK-UP SHORTSTOP HITS A 3 RUN HOMERUN OFF THE DODGERS RIGHT FIELDER WHO CAME IN TO PITCH.  IT WAS FUN TO SEE. ALSO , THE OVATION WHEN CHASE UTLEY BATTED WAS DEAFENING. THAT HAD TO FEEL GOOD.  AS ALWAYS , FOOD AND DRINK WAS AWESOME ( ESPECIALLY WHEN IT IS FREE ).

  ANOTHER STORY - MY ELDEST TEXTS ME HER FRIEND IS AT THE GAME. I TEXT THE FRIEND AND SHE IS RIGHT ABOVE US. WE INVITE THEM TO THE SUITE AND IT WAS FUN TO SEE THEM. EVEN COOLER WAS THEIR UNCLE KNOWS THE NAIL AND I KNEW HIM. I POSTED A FACEBOOK PICTURE WHERE FAMILY CAN SEE IT.

  ANOTHER FAMILY MEMBER JOINS US AROUND THE 9TH INNING. HE WAS SITTING IN THE 2ND ROW BEHIND THE CATCHER. YEP......THAT'S KINDA NICE.

  I DRIVE EVERYONE HOME. IT IS 1AM AND I AM PRETTY TIRED. I DID NOT DRINK BRANDY WHICH IS A GOOD THING AND MOSTLY STUCK TO GIN AND TONIC. THE BARTENDER GAVE ME 2 BIG PLASTIC CONTAINERS OF LEMONS AND LIMES FOR THE NAIL. THIS IS THE 2ND TIME HE HAS DONE THIS.

  OH , WE HAVE A GOOD CONNECTION NOW FOR A DISNEY CRUISE.

  OFF TO BED AND SLEPT GOOD. THE NEXT MORNING I GET A CALL FROM A RENTER THAT OUR DEAD BOLT LOCK BROKE AT OUR CONDO. YEP......ALWAYS SOMETHING.

  OH , ANOTHER THING.....ME AND MY ELDEST HAVE SOME POISON IVY.

  WEDNESDAY      7 - 25 - 18

  WATCHED SEASON FINALE OF " LUKE CAGE "......EH.

  HAD CRABS FOR LUNCH. PRETTY DAMN GOOD.....FRESH FROM THE DOCK.

  TRIED TO TAKE IT EASY TODAY SINCE I HAVE ALOT OF PROJECTS AT THE NAIL. TOOK A RIDE TO THE BANK FOR A DEPOSIT.  FOUND OUT MY ELDEST HAD A PARTY AT OUR HOUSE WHEN WE WERE GONE.......AGAIN.  WHEN YOU LEAVE BURNT FIREWORKS AND CIGARETTE BUTTS ON MY LAWN THAT'S A " TELL ". WHEN OUR LAUNDRY TUB SMELLS LIKE BEER AND THE VACUUM HAS BEEN USED THAT'S A GUILTY VERDICT.

  USED GORILLA WOOD GLUE TO FIX A DESK DOOR THAT WAS ATTEMPTED TO BE PRIED OPEN. IT LOOKS HORRIBLE SO I GLUED AS MANY WOOD PIECES AS I COULD FIND AND THAN LEFT A NOTE ......." DO NOT OPEN THIS FUCKING DOOR ".  I ALSO SUPER GLUED A PLATE HOLDER AND MY CELL PHONE BELT HOLDER.

  LANDED ANOTHER SIDE JOB.

  BILLY JOEL ON FRIDAY NIGHT AND EAGLES / JAMES TAYLOR ON SATURDAY NIGHT.  BOTH AT CITIZEN'S BANK PARK. WE KNOW PEOPLE THERE.

  THE NEWS IS SO DAMN DEPRESSING. ALL TRAGIC DEATHS OR MURDERS. ANOTHER DUCK BOAT TRAGEDY WHERE ONE LADY LOST 11 MEMBERS OF HER FAMILY. IT IS UNTHINKABLE.  ANOTHER INCIDENT WHERE 2 SISTERS WERE ATTACKED BY A KNIFE WIELDING PSYCHO. ONE SISTER DIED AND SHE WAS ABSOLUTELY BEAUTIFUL. THE FATHER BEING INTERVIEWED WAS HEART BREAKING. HE SAID , " MY DAUGHTER WAS MY WORLD. " I COULD NOT AGREE WITH HIM MORE. I WOULD NEVER STOP CRYING OF PAIN.

  OFF TO THE NAIL TO DO PROJECTS. THIS WAS EXHAUSTING :

  - CALLED , EMAILED , AND FACEBOOK MESSAGED MANY BANDS TO TRY TO SALVAGE SATURDAY NIGHT. 3 BANDS ALL WITH BIG FOLLOWINGS CANCELLED ON US. THIS WOULD OF BEEN OUR BIGGEST NIGHT OF THE MONTH. TWO BANDS WERE FOR GUARANTEED MONEY AT OTHER CLUBS. YEP , IT SUCKS BEING SO SMALL. WISH I COULD GIVE BANDS A $1,000 EVERY TIME THEY PLAYED HERE. ALSO , PLACED A FACEBOOK AD FOR THE WEEKEND.

  - TESTED SODA GUN'S WATER BUTTON. SOME HOW CO2 IS BEING MIXED WITH IT. THINK I FIXED IT.

  - TESTED EVERY DRAFT. USING A THERMOSTAT ALL DRAFTS WERE POURING NICELY AND CHILLED PERFECTLY. I ALSO TASTE TESTED EVERY DRAFT JUST TO MAKE SURE THE BEER WAS COLD.  I DID THIS 4 TIMES WITH EACH DRAFT BECAUSE I WANTED TO BE THOROUGH.

  - CLEANED BACK KITCHEN AREA.

  - CLIMBED UP ABOVE WALK-IN FREEZER AND ORGANIZED THE AREA.

  - RE-PROGRAMMED AN EXHAUST FAN AND OUTSIDE LIGHTING ABOVE THE WALK-IN FREEZER. BOTH WERE NOT GOING ON AND OFF WHEN I WANTED THEM TOO.

  - MEASURED CUTTING BOARDS IN THE BACK. THEY NEED TO BE REPLACED.

  - SINCE WE REPLACED OUR CREDIT CARD TERMINAL A BARTENDER NOTICED SOMETHING. THE CUSTOMER'S RECEIPT WAS READING MY HOME ADDRESS AND MY CELL PHONE NUMBER. YEP.....IT ONLY TOOK 6 MONTHS TO PICK THIS UP. A VERY NICE REP HELPED ME CHANGE IT TO WHEELS CELL PHONE NUMBER. JUST KIDDING......IT NOW HAS NAIL ADDRESS AND PHONE NUMBER.

  - CONTACTED A GUY WHO BUYS OLD VINYL ALBUMS. HE REPLIED TO MY EMAIL VERY QUICKLY. I SENT HIM A LIST OF ALBUMS FOR SALE AND HE NEVER GOT BACK TO ME.......FUCKING PEOPLE.

  - FILLED ALL PINK SOAP BOTTLES IN BATHROOMS  , KITCHEN , AND FRONT BAR AREAS. IF I DON'T DO IT WHO WILL ?

  - CONTACTED A YOUNG KID WHO WAS BANNED FROM THE NAIL. HE EXTENDED A PROVERBIAL OLIVE BRANCH SO I RECIPROCATED AND ALLOWED HIM BACK IN. WE MESSAGED VIA FACEBOOK. ALL MY NEW GIRL COLLEGE BARTENDERS WERE HAPPY.

  - STOCKED BEER , DID INVENTORY LISTS OF FOOD & LIQUOR , AND CHECKED P.A. SYSTEM.

  - MESSED WITH ICE MACHINE WHICH IS NOT PRODUCING DICK WITH ICE.  THE HOT WEATHER KILLS OUR ICE PRODUCTION BIG TIME BECAUSE THE MACHINE IS " AIRED COOLED ".  IF I LEAVE OUR 5 TON A/C UNIT ON 24/7 IT WOULD SOLVE THE PROBLEM......BUT OUR ELECTRIC BILL BE TRIPLE.  I TROUBLE SHOT AND CLEANED THE MACHINE FOR ABOUT AN HOUR. WE WILL SEE TOMORROW.

  BACK HOME I CHILL WITH WHEELS FOR A LITTLE BIT. I WAS TIRED SO BOTH OF US CRASHED. I WAS SUPER PLEASANTLY SURPRISED WHEN MY YOUNGEST CAME IN MY BEDROOM. WE TALKED , WATCHED TV , AND SNUGGLED. THIS IS HOW ALL MY NIGHTS SHOULD END.

  THURSDAY     7 - 26 - 18

  STARTS OUT WITH A " NO " BUT ALWAYS SAYS " YES ".  IT'S NOT WHAT YOU THINK.

  POISON IVY IS DEFINITELY WORSE THAN I THOUGHT. I REMEMBER IT NOW FROM LAST YEAR AND IT DID NOT GO AWAY FOR MONTHS. I GOT IT THE WORST AND MY ELDEST IS A CLOSE SECOND.

  WHEELS AND I SIGN 200 PAPERS , TAKE ANOTHER LOAN OUT , AND HAVE TO RETURN TO THE BANK BECAUSE OF SOME CONFUSION. YEAH.......LOVE LOANS AND BANKS.

  YOUNGEST AND I CLEAN OUT RABBIT HUTCH AND CHANGE ALL BEDDING , WATER BOTTLES , AND FOOD.

  PHILLIES WITH A HOME RUN DERBY STYLE WIN. BRAVE LOSE......UP 2 1/2 GAMES IN FIRST PLACE. WHO WOULDA THOUGHT.

  MORE BASEBALL : COLE HAMELS GOES TO CUBS AND J.A. HAPP GOES TO YANKEES.

  DECIDED TO MOW THE LAWNS TODAY. FOR ONCE MY SELF PROPELLED MOWER STARTED RIGHT UP. IT WORKED PERFECTLY.  SOMETHING ABOUT A CUT LAWN THAT FEELS GOOD.

  GOT SOME OTHER THINGS DONE AND THAN IT WAS TIME TO HEAD TO THE NAIL TO PREP. I ASKED MY YOUNGEST 5 TIMES TO GO BUT EACH TIME SHE REPLIED " NO ".   HERE'S WHAT WE DID :

  - TAKE A MOTORCYCLE RIDE TO THE NAIL. BUT WE FIRST STOP AT A MAIL BOX. WELL......NOT REALLY STOP.  YOU SEE.....I ALWAYS PLAY WITH MY KID. I ENTER THE PARKING LOT WITH THE MAILBOXES. ONE BOX HAS A CHUTE STICKING OUT FOR PEOPLE TO PLACE THE ENVELOPES INTO. WELL , MY KID IS HOLDING THE LETTERS AND THINKS I AM GOING TO STOP MY MOTORCYCLE AT THE CHUTE BUT I SPEED UP JUST AS WE GO BY THE MAILBOXES. I HEAR HER YELL OUT , " OH C'MON !! " I CIRCLE BACK AND WE RIDE NEAR THE MAILBOXES AGAIN. I SLOWLY APPROACH BUT WITHIN 20 FEET I SPEED UP AGAIN. THERE IS NO WAY THIS KID CAN THROW 5 ENVELOPES INTO THAT SMALL OPENING GOING 15 MPH BY IT. I HEAR , " AHH HAA !! ".  I CIRCLE MY BIKE WITH HER ON THE BACK A 3RD TIME THINKING I AM GOING TO SEE ENVELOPES ALL OVER THE GROUND. I SEE NONE AND SAY , " WHERE ARE THE LETTERS ? " SHE REPLIES SLYLY , " IN THE MAIL BOX."  I COULD NOT BELIEVE SHE MADE THEM. SHE LAUGHED AT MY ASTONISHMENT.

  - CONTINUED OUR RIDE AND MY YOUNGEST IS NOW MY SIGNALER. ON ANY TURN I HAVE HER PUT OUT AN ARM TO SIGNAL A MOTORCYCLE TURN. THE KID CRACKS ME UP.

  - PARK OUT FRONT AND I SAY , " SO , HAVE YOU EVER DONE A FULL OPEN ? " THE KID REPLIES , " NO , BUT I HAVE DONE IT WITH YOU MANY TIMES. "  I REPLY , " OKAY , HERE IS THE DEAL. IF YOU DO A FULL OPEN WITH LESS THAN 10 MISTAKES I WILL BUY YOU ICE CREAM. " SHE CONFIDENTLY SAYS , " I'LL TAKE THAT BET. "

  - MY YOUNGEST OPENS THE DOOR AND SHUTS DOWN THE SECURITY SYSTEM. SHE METICULOUSLY BEGINS THE PROCESS OF PREPPING THE NAIL. I DO SOME LITTLE PROJECTS LIKE EMPTYING TRASH AND STOCKING FOOD. WITHIN 15 MINUTES SHE SAYS SHE IS DONE. THE KID FORGOT 4 OUT OF 30 THINGS TO OPEN WHICH IS EXCELLENT. I OWE HER ICE CREAM.

  - WE WAIT FOR OUR ADORABLE COLLEGE BARTENDER TO COME IN. I HAVE HER DO A FULL CLOSE AS PRACTICE.

  - WE ROLL OUT AND STOP AT " RITA'S WATER ICE ".  THE KID GETS A COTTON CANDY WATER ICE AND I GOT NOTHING. BEFORE ENTERING A GROUP OF 7 GIRLS ARE BLOCKING THE STEPS AND DOOR TO ENTER. NOT ONE MOVED. I THOUGHT , " JESUS , KIDS THESE DAYS. " BUT I DID NOT DWELL ON IT. ALL 7 GIRLS WERE WEARING THE SAME SPORTS SHIRT SO WE FIGURED THEY WERE ALL PART OF A TEAM. WE WALK OUT AND AGAIN THE GIRLS DO NOT MOVE SO WE GO AROUND THEM. AGAIN , I THINK " IGNORANT FUCKING KIDS. "  MY YOUNGEST AND I TALK BY MY MOTORCYCLE WHILE SHE EATS HER WATER ICE. THE 7 GIRLS BEGIN TO LEAVE AND ALL 7 HAVE THEIR OWN CARS. 2 KIDS IN THE PARKING LOT STAND IN THE WAY OF 5 CARS TRYING TO GET OUT OF THE PARKING LOT. I MEAN THE FRIENDS DRIVING BEEP THEIR HORNS TO TELL THEM TO GET OUT OF THE WAY. I TURNED TO MY KID AND SAY , " WHAT THE HELL IS IT WITH THESE GIRLS ? " MY KID RESPONDS , " I GUESS THEY ARE KINDA SPOILED SINCE EVERY ONE OF THEM HAS THEIR OWN CAR." SHE WAS RIGHT.

  - MY YOUNGEST PLACES HER WATER ICE ON THE CURB. ONLY 10% IS LEFT. SHE GRABS A BACK PACK AND HELMET. I START THE BIKE AND REV MY ENGINE JUST A LITTLE. THE EXHAUST PIPE BLOWS GARDEN WOOD CHIPS INTO HER REMAINING WATER ICE CUP. SHE GIGGLES AND SAYS , " I WAS ALMOST DONE IT ANYWAY. " I APOLOGIZE.

  - ARRIVE HOME AND I ASK , " SOOOOOO , WAS IT WORTH GOING WITH DADDY ? " SHE RELUCTANTLY REPLIES , " YES. " THE KID DOES THIS TO ME EVERY TIME. TELLS ME NO AND THAN HAS A GREAT TIME WITH ME. I NEED THIS KID SO BAD.

 AT HOME WHEELS IS UP THE STREET WITH A FRIEND. I CHILL AND END THE NIGHT WITH SOME RED WINE , ALMONDS , AND SOME MOZZARELLA CHEESE.

  WHEELS AND HER FRIEND COME HOME. MY ELDEST COMES HOME FROM HER COLLEGE HOUSE. ALL OF US TALK FOR AWHILE. IT WAS NICE.

  OFF TO BED , BUT BEFORE I SLEEP BOTH MY KIDS AND MYSELF APPLY CALADRYL FOR THE POISON IVY RASHES WE HAVE.

  FRIDAY      7 - 27 - 18

  AND THAT IS WHAT YOU CALL , " SUCKING US IN. "

  I THINK THIS POISON IVY IS WAY WORSE THAN WHAT I THOUGHT. I NOW HAVE SWELLING ON MY LEFT ANKLE. I WONDER IF SALT SEA WATER WOULD HELP ?

  OFF TO THE NAIL BY 7AM. I GET A TON DONE AND PREP THE BAR FOR THE NIGHT.

  BACK HOME WE LOAD UP.  MY YOUNGEST , A FRIEND , AND MYSELF ARE HEADING EAST. MOTHER NATURE FOUGHT ALL DAY AND NIGHT TO KEEP THE RAIN AWAY. FOR THE MOST PART SHE DID A GOOD JOB.

  6 MILES AWAY FROM OUR HOUSE AND WE HIT TRAFFIC AND DOWN POURING RAIN. I CALL MY COUSINS WHO ARE RENTING OUR CONDO AND ASK IF THEY LIKE LUNCH. THEY TELL ME AS SOON AS THEY GET OFF THE BEACH. I REPLIED , " WAIT , YOU GUYS ARE ON THE BEACH ? I AM 5 MILES FROM YOU AND IT IS DOWN POURING. "

  I ORDER LUNCH FOR EVERYONE AT " RUSSO'S ".  A LARGE 22 INCH ROASTED PORK WITH SHARP PROVOLONE AND BROCCOLI RABE WAS THE MAIN TREAT.  THE PLACE WAS PACKED AND HAD A 20 MINUTE WAIT. IMAGINE THIS ? YOU HAVE 20 PEOPLE WORKING AND THERE IS STILL A WAIT.  THIS PLACE IS A GOLD MINE. MY YOUNGEST SAYS , " YOU SHOULD OPEN A SANDWICH SHOP. " THE FRIEND SAYS YOU SHOULD NAME IT " NICOLE B'S "

   OH , WHEELS GAVE PERMISSION FOR OUR ELDEST TO TAKE ALL THE CHANGE FROM EVERY VEHICLE SO SHE COULD BUY FOOD. WHY DO I HAVE A MAJOR ISSUE WITH THIS BESIDES IT BEING UNBELIEVABLE LAZY AND MY MONEY ? I HAD TO PARK AT A METER NEAR " RUSSO'S " AND GUESS WHAT ......NOT A FUCKING COIN IN MY VEHICLE. I HAD MY YOUNGEST KEEP AN EYE ON OUR CAR AS I PURCHASED THE FOOD.

   TO OUR CONDO AND WE HAVE LUNCH WHILE MY COUSIN PACKS UP AND LEAVES. WE TIMED THIS PERFECTLY. HE GAVE ME A BEER AND THE KIDS GOT WATER AND ICE TEA.  THEY ROLL AND WE FINISH LUNCH. THE FOOD IS EXPENSIVE BUT REALLY DAMN GOOD.

  THE KIDS HELP ME WITH CLEANING OUR OUTSIDE A/C UNIT. I USED A LEAF BLOWER , THAN SPRAYED A SOLVENT TO BREAK DOWN GRINDED MUCK IN THE COILS , AND THAN I USED A HOSE. I CLEANED THIS WHILE THE KIDS LEAF BLEW AROUND OUR PROPERTY AND THE FRONT SCREEN WHICH HAD SAND ON IT.

  OFF TO THE BOARDWALK. I HAD TO PARK 20 BLOCKS AWAY BECAUSE OF ONE THING. I HAD NO FUCKING CHANGE FOR THE METERS.  A 30 SECOND WALK TURNED INTO A 15 MINUTE WALK.

  A VERY NICE WOMEN GIVES US IDEAS ON PURCHASING WRISTLETS FOR THE RIDES. THE KIDS HAD FULL ACCESS TO ALL RIDES WHICH NOW INCLUDE TRAM CAR RIDES TOO.

  I DRIVE TO HOME DEPOT AND PURCHASE MORE THINGS THAN WHAT I WANTED. I DO LIKE THIS PLACE AND IT WAS SLOW WHICH WAS GOOD FOR ME. I ALSO HAVE AN EMPLOYEE CUT NEW KEYS FOR ME WHILE I SHOPPED. I GO THROUGH THE REGISTER LINE FAST AND HEAD TOWARDS MY CAR IN THE PARKING LOT. I THINK , " MAN., THAT WAS ONE FO THE QUICKEST TRIPS TO HOME DEPOT I EVER DID. " I FEEL GOOD. THAN , I REALIZE I FORGET THE NEW CUT KEYS. I GO BACK INSIDE AND GET THE KEYS. I WANT TO USE THE SAME REGISTER PERSON TO AVOID ANY SUSPICION. THE EMPLOYEE ALREADY CLOSED HIS REGISTER BUT HE WALKS ME TO ANOTHER ONE.  I THAN ROLL OUT AGAIN. SO MUCH FOR FAST TIMING.

  BACK HOME HAVE TO HEAD TO THE BEACH. I WALK FOR ABOUT 45 MINUTES AND MY LEGS AND ANKLE ACHE. I USE THE COOL OCEAN WATER TO WALK THROUGH. IT FEELS WONDERFUL ON MY POISON IVY. AFTER MY WALK I JUST STAND IN THE WATER TO PEOPLE AND LIFE GUARD WATCH. JESUS THEY HAVE SOME SUPER HOT LIFE GUARDS HERE.

  SOMEONE ON THE BEACH MADE THIS GIANT OCTOPUS. IT WAS PRETTY COOL AND I SAID TO MYSELF , " I SHOULD TAKE A PICTURE OF THAT ? " I FIGURE I TAKE A PICTURE ON THE WAY BACK. WHEN I RETURNED 5 LITTLE KIDS SMASHED THE BEJESUS OUT OF IT. 

  OH , THE BEACHES ARE PACKED AND AFTER STARING AT COUNTLESS HOT GIRLS IN SKIMPY BIKINIS I JUST WALKED HOME SINCE I HAVE NO LIFE. IT ACTUALLY BOTHERED ME AFTER SEEING SO MUCH ASS THAT I WILL NEVER BE YOUNG AGAIN.........HAIR , BODY , ATHLETICISM , LOOKS , ......ALL GONE. FAT AND EXCELLENT AT MIMICKING WHALE CALLING IS MY BEST ATTRIBUTES. I WANT THE OCEAN TO TAKE ME BACK.

  I POSTED SOME PICTURES ON FACEBOOK OF MY YOUNGEST AND HER FRIEND. THEY ABSOLUTELY CRACK ME UP. THE FRIEND IS MY FAVORITE.

  I BEGIN MY PROJECTS WHEN BACK HOME. I GO OVER THE WHOLE PROPERTY CLEANING , FIXING TV'S , AND ORGANIZING.

  THE KIDS RETURN AROUND 8:30PM. THE RAIN DID SHUT THE RIDES DOWN FOR ABOUT 30 MINUTES BUT THAT WAS IT.

  I WATCH THE PHILLIES , WATCH NAIL SURVEILLANCE , AND CONTINUE TO DO ODD JOBS. 

  THE KID SETTLE IN AND EAT AGAIN. WE WILL GET 3 MEALS OUT OF " RUSSO'S ".  BY 9:45PM WE WALK TO THE OCEAN. WE STAND IN THE OCEAN AND TALK. THE WATER FEELS AWESOME. WE HOPED FOR FIREWORKS BUT IT WAS A NO GO.

  OFF TO BED AND MAN DID LAYING DOWN FEEL SO DAMN GOOD. I WATCH TV UNTIL ABOUT MIDNIGHT AND MY LEGS THANK ME FOR THE COOL BEDDING AND THE 300 POUNDS OF WEIGHT LIFTED OFF THEM.

  I FALL ASLEEP , HAVE A COUPLE OF DREAMS AND MY CELL PHONE GOES OFF. I WAS TEXTED.

  FALL BACK ASLEEP AND BLISS ARRIVES QUICKLY.  AT 3AM , I AM IN FULL R.E.M. SLEEP......UNTIL MY CELL PHONE GOES OFF. THE HAVERTOWN POLICE CALL ME AND SAY MY ALARM IS GOING OFF AT THE NAIL.

  I FALL BACK ASLEEP A 3RD TIME. BY 6AM I GOT UP.

  BARTENDER SPENDS 45 MINUTES CLEANING OUT A PIZZA OVEN. SHE LET A PIZZA FALL OFF THE GRATE AND INTO THE COILS. THIS HAD TO BE FUN. SHE IS A GOOD KID.

  OH , SO WHY THE " SUCKING US IN " STATEMENT ABOVE ? WE RETURN FROM THE BEACH AND THE PHILLIES ARE DOWN 6 - 3.THEY RALLY TO MAKE IT 6 - 4 IN THE 9TH INNING. MY YOUNGEST SAYS , " OOOOOH , MAYBE THEY CAN WIN ?" I SHAKE MY HEAD AND SAY , " THIS IS WHAT YOU CALL ' SUCKING US IN ' TO PHILADELPHIA FANS. THEY WILL NOT WIN THIS GAME OR RALLY BECAUSE WE HAVE SEEN THIS OVER 10,000 TIMES. PHILLY JUST DOESN'T WIN IN ANY SPORT FOR THE MOST PART. " THE PHILLIES WITH 2 MEN ON AND 2 RUNS DOWN HAVE THEIR HOME RUN HITTER COME UP.  HE HAS A TERRIBLE AT BAT AND WE LOSE.

  OH , THE PHILLIES ARE 0 - 56 WHEN DOWN AFTER THE 8TH INNING....WORST IN BASEBALL.

  OH , WHEELS WENT TO BILLY JOEL. I WAS TEXTED BILLY JOEL'S SET LIST.....KINDA COOL.

  ONE MORE STORY. I NEVER KNEW PEOPLE ARE CALLED " THEY " WHEN BEING DESCRIBED. MY BARTENDER TOLD ME HER ROOM MATE WAS MOVING OUT. JUST ONE PERSON WAS BEING A NUDGE SO THEY WANTED HER OUT. SHE KEPT USING THE PRONOUN " THEY " AND I KEPT SAYING ," IS IT MORE THAN ONE PERSON ? " SHE WOULD REPLY , " NO IT IS JUST ONE ROOM MATE. " AFTER SAYING THE WORD " THEY " 5 MORE TIMES AND ME SAYING , " IS IT MORE THAN ONE PERSON ? ". THEY TOLD ME THE ROOM MATE WAS A UNDECIDED GENDER OR SOMETHING LIKE THAT. WHERE THE HELL DID THIS DESCRIPTION COME FROM ?

  SATURDAY       7 - 28 - 18

  JUST CALL ME FATMAN.............SAVING LIVES AND EATING FOOD WHEREVER I GO. ( ACTUALLY , I DID SAVE A PERSON FROM SERIOUS INJURY THOUGH )

  GOING TO NORTH WILDWOOD WORKED ABSOLUTELY PERFECT.........IF ONLY I HAD ANOTHER DAY.  I AM NOT BIG ON 2 DAY TRIPS ( NEVER DO ONE DAY ) , BUT THIS WAS FUN. EARLY MORNING I BEGIN MY LIST OF THINGS TO GET DONE AND START LOADING UP. THE HARDEST TASK WAS TO GET THE KIDS UP BEFORE 8AM. I HAVE TO BEAT THE WILDEBEEST VACATIONERS FROM 10AM CHECK-OUTS. MOST RENTERS ARE LEAVING THE ENTIRE COAST AT 10AM. I AM WAY WAY TOO EXPERIENCED TO LEAVE ANY LATER THAN 9AM.

  BY 7:45AM WE ARE ON THE ROAD. THE KIDS HELPED ME LOAD UP AND WE WERE HEADING TOWARDS BRIGANTINE. YEP , THE KIDS WERE STAYING AT THE SEA SHORE AT A FRIENDS HOUSE SO I SAID I DRIVE THEM THERE AND HEAD HOME. OF COURSE THERE HAD TO BE A LITTLE DELAY.

  DOING 55 MPH IN A 45 MPH I GET PULLED OVER BY A POLICE OFFICER. I THOUGHT THE BLACK HORSE BIKE WAS STILL 55MPH.....AN HONEST MISTAKE. LUCKILY ( WHICH I NEVER HAVE ) THE OFFICER LEFT ME OFF WITH A WARNING. HE WAS ACTUALLY VERY COOL.

  BY 9AM , WE ARRIVE AND 12 FAMILY MEMBERS ARE UP AND ABOUT. THEY ALL KNOW ME , MY BROTHERS , AND EVEN MORE COOL , THE GRANDFATHER KNEW MY DAD. I MADE A TON OF JOKES AND HAD EVERYONE LAUGHING.

  THE KIDS AND I TAKE A RIDE WITH THE DAD. I WANTED TO SEE THEIR NEW PROPERTY THEY JUST PURCHASED. OH......MY......GOD.........DID IT BRING BACK THE PAIN OF REMODELING OUR CONDO FROM SCRATCH COMBINED WITH SPENDING 5 YEARS TO BUILD A MOUNTAIN HOUSE. THIS GUY AND HIS FAMILY HAVE A SHIT LOAD OF WORK. THE BIG " BUT " ( BESIDES MINE ) IS THE WORD ' POTENTIAL '.  THE HOMES ARE PROBABLY IN THE HIGH 200'S TO LOW 300'S RANGE. HURRICANE SANDY WIPED OUT SEVERAL PROPERTIES AND SOME ARE JUST VACANT GRASSED LOTS NOW.....WHOLE HOMES ARE GONE.  THIS HOME NEEDS A LOT OF REBUILDING BUT WHEN DONE IT IS PRETTY COOL.

  9:45AM AND I WASTED TOO MUCH TIME. I NEED TO GET ON THE A/C HIGHWAY NOW. I MAKE IT ALL THE WAY TO 10 MILES TO THE WALT WHITMAN BRIDGE AND IT SLOWS DOWN TO A CRAWL. I WENT AGAINST MY NUMBER ONE RULE , " NEVER DRIVE WITH THE WILDBEAST " AKA RENTERS. THE BEN FRANKLIN BRIDGE BEING CLOSED DID NOT HELP. I TOOK A PICTURE OF THE STANDSTILL TRAFFIC AND SENT IT TO MY YOUNGEST SAYING , " SEE WHY I SHOULD LEAVE MUCH EARLIER ? "  IT DID MOVE AND I-95 WAS MOVING OKAY. THAN THE BLUE ROUTE WAS BACKED UP SO I GOT OFF AN EXIT AND RE-ENTERED ON THE SAME ENTRANCE. IT WORKED GOOD AND I MADE DECENT TIME.

  OH , THE RENTERS HEADING TOWARDS THE SHORE.....OH....MY.....GOD !!   BACKED UP AND MILES AND MILES AND MILES AND MILES AND MILES OF TRAFFIC. IT WAS MOVING NO FASTER THAN 3 MPH !!  THIS WAS FROM THE BLUE ROUTE TO I-95 TO A/C EXPRESSWAY. WHY THE HELL WOULD YOU EVER LEAVE AT THIS TIME !!!!

  STRAIGHT TO THE NAIL TO PREP FOR THE NIGHT AND DO OTHER STUFF. AFTER AN HOUR IT WAS TIME TO HEAD HOME.

  IN THE DRIVEWAY I SEE WHEELS AND THE PUP SITTING ON THE PATIO WAITING FOR ME. THE PUP BEGINS TO HOWL WITH JOY. IT WAS THE MOST BEAUTIFUL THING I EVER SAW.  WHEELS HELPS ME UNLOAD AND I DO NOT GO INSIDE JUST YET. I SPRAY WEED KILLER ON THE AREA THAT GAVE ME AND MY KIDS POISON IVY. I WILL CONTINUE TO GO TERMINATOR ON THIS AREA FOR THE NEXT WEEK. THAN WHEELS HELPS ME CLEAN A PIECE OF CORIAN.

  OK.......NOW I HEAD IN. WE UNLOAD AGAIN AND WHEELS MAKES US EGG SANDWICHES ON WHEAT.

  WE HAVE A LONG NIGHT SO NOW I MUST NAP.  I GO TO MY BEDROOM AND SLEEP FOR ABOUT 35 MINUTES. I AM RE-CHARGED AND NOW THE FUN BEGINS.  HERE'S WHAT HAPPENED.

  - WHEELS AND I ATTEND THE EAGLES AND JAMES TAYLOR CONCERT AT CITIZEN'S BANK PARK. THIS IS ALL FREE.

  - WE WALK TO A FRIEND'S HOUSE AND HE DRIVES. FIVE OF US MAKE DECENT TIME AND HEAD INTO THE V.I.P. PARKING SECTION. 2 POLICE DOGS SNIFF OUR VEHICLE FOR DRUGS AND BOMBS. WE HAD NONE SO WE WENT THROUGH.

  - MEET AT TICKET OFFICE AFTER GOING THROUGH A METAL DETECTOR. NOW AT LEAST 14 OF US ARE HERE. LET THE PARTY BEGIN.

  - I KNOW AT LEAST 20 PEOPLE AT THE CONCERT. SOME OF THEM I MET DURING THE JAMES TAYLOR PORTION. I DID NOT CARE FOR HIS MUSIC TOO MUCH. I RESPECT IT BUT EVERY SONG WAS SIMILAR AND SLOW PACED. I NOW FOUND A CURE FOR MY SLEEP APNEA......PLAY JAMES TAYLOR MUSIC BEFORE GOING TO BED.

  - CLOSE TO 20 PEOPLE IN 2 SUITES. FOOD ( CRAB CAKES , CHICKEN CHEESE STEAKS , PIZZA , CRACKERS & CHEESE , PRETZELS , COOKIES , CHOCOLATE PRETZELS , SPINACH DIP , AND MORE ) AND OPEN BAR WITH A BARTENDER WHICH WHEELS AND I BOTH TIPPED $20 EACH. WE HAD THE PHILLIES GAME ON TOO IN WHICH THEY BLOW AND LOST. THEY WILL LOSE 3 OF 4 TO THE LAST PLACE REDS AFTER SUNDAY'S GAME.

  - WHEELS AND I TAKE WALKS TO MEET FRIENDS AND SAY HELLO. SHE ALSO BUYS AN EAGLES SHIRT FOR $40. IN THE PARKING LOT......$5. NOT GOING TO COMPLAIN BECAUSE THIS WAS A $2,000 DOLLAR NIGHT AS I SEE IT.

  - EAGLES BEGIN TO PLAY AND THE SON OF GLEN FREY NAMED DEACON FREY DOES A GOOD JOB. THE KID IS JUST 18 YEARS OLD ( TURNS 19 TOMORROW ).  COUNTRY SINGER VINCE GILL TOOK MANY OF THE LEAD SONGS WAS VERY GOOD TOO. I WAS SURPRISED TO SEE DON HENLEY TAKE A BACK SEAT TO THE SHOW. HE LET THE OTHERS SHINE AND CONTRIBUTE TO THE MEMORIAL OF GLENN FREY. TO ME , THE SHOW WAS SPIRITUAL.

  - THE SHOW WAS VERY GOOD BUT IT DID NOT MAKE MY TOP 5 BEST CONCERTS. THE OPENING SONG IS ALL ACAPELLA AND WAS VERY GOOD. BUT........TO ME , NO COMPARISON TO THE VERSION OF THE ORIGINAL MEMBERS. I THOUGHT IT WAS THE PERFECT SONG TO OPEN WITH. ON THE OTHER SIDE , ENDING WITH " DESPERADO " PROBABLY SHOULD OF BEEN " HOTEL CALIFORNIA ".

  - ALL OF THE NEW MEMBERS PERFORMED WONDERFULLY BUT ONE THING ALWAYS RISES TO THE CREAM OF THE CROP AND HIS NAME IS JOE WALSH. HE IS A GUY WE WANT TO HANG WITH , PARTY WITH , AND TRASH A HOTEL ROOM WITH. HE IS THE ULTIMATE COOL DUDE AND WHENEVER HIS SONGS WERE PLAYED THE ELECTRICITY INCREASED 10 FOLD. NOW , YEARS OF PARTYING AND DRUGS MAY HAVE AFFECTED HIS MEMORY BECAUSE SOME LYRICS WERE SLIGHTLY CHANGED OR SLIGHTLY FORGOTTEN BUT OVERALL HE WAS ALOT OF FUN.

  - THE NIGHT ROLLED ON AND EVERYONE WAS COOL AND FUN. WE DANCED , WE SANG , AND WE ENJOYED THE ENTIRE EVENING. I HAVE A VIDEO OF WHEELS , MYSELF , AND A FRIEND SINGING " HOTEL CALIFORNIA ". I POSTED IT ON FACEBOOK. IT MAKES ME SUPER SMILE WHEN I WATCHED THE RECORDING. IN LESS THAN 5 MINUTES IT HAD OVER 100 " VIEWS ". SOME FAMILY ALREADY MADE COMMENTS.

  - WHEELS AND I RETURN A FLIP FLOP TO A FRIEND. YES.......A FLIP FLOP. WE VACATIONED WITH THEM IN NORTH CAROLINA 2 MONTHS AGO AND THE FRIEND FORGOT IT. SO , WE MET AT AN EAGLES CONCERT TO DELIVER ONE FLIP FLOP......PRETTY FUNNY.

  - WE END THE NIGHT WITH ALL OF US SINGING THE ENCORE SONGS......DAMN GOOD TIME.

  - ROLL HOME AND TOTALLY AVOID TRAFFIC. WE MAKE GREAT TIME BUT WE HIT VERY VERY SLOW TRAFFIC ON 76 AFTER THE CITY LINE AVENUE EXIT. WHO WOULD OF THOUGHT THIS ? I USUALLY GET OFF THERE AND NOT CONTINUE ALL THE WAY UP TO THE BLUE ROUTE. BUT IT WAS 1AM AND WHO THOUGHT IT COME TO A STOP.  WE GOT FROM THE STADIUM TO THERE IN 20 MINUTES BUT FROM THERE TO HOME IN 35 MINUTES.

  - AT HOME OUR FRIENDS DROP US OFF. WE GRAB OUR STUFF WHICH INCLUDED COOKIES , LEMONS , CHOCOLATE PRETZELS , AND 10 FIXED MIC CORDS FOR THE NAIL.

  - WE HAVE A NIGHTCAP BUT I AM TIRED. I HAVE A SMALL DOUBLE SHOT OF RED WINE AND IT WAS OFF TO BED. NO BRANDY THE ENTIRE NIGHT !!

  SAVING A LIFE :

  OKAY , MAYBE SAVING A LIFE MAY BE EXAGGERATING A LITTLE BIT BUT IT COULD OF HAPPENED. AT THE VERY LEAST I SAVED THIS OLDER LADY FROM SERIOUS INJURY.  I AM SEATED IN THE FRONT ROW OUTSIDE THE SUITE WITH WHEELS. WE HAVE THIS OLDER WOMAN NEXT TO ME ON MY LEFT. SHE EITHER IS DRUNK OR HAS LEG ISSUES OR A COMBINATION OF BOTH. EITHER WAY MY ANTENNAS WENT UP BIG TIME. FROM THE SUITE THERE ARE 3 STEPS DOWN TO THE FRONT ROW. THIS OLDER BLONDE WOMAN WENT UP AND INTO THE SUITE FOR SOMETHING. I AM WATCHING HER AND SHE IS SLIGHTLY STAGGERING. SO NOW I AM WATCHING HER AS SHE RETURNS. I MOVED TO THE TOP OF THE STEPS AND OPENED THE DOOR TO LET A/C OUT. YEP.....IT WAS ALITTLE WARM OUTSIDE SO I PROPPED A DOOR TO LET THE ICE COLD AIR FROM INSIDE TO OUTSIDE.

  CONTINUED - THE HUSBAND OF THE OLDER BLONDE LADY IS A BLUE BLUE BLUE BLOOD. ZERO MOVEMENT THE ENTIRE SHOW AND HE HAS HIS COLLAR IN THE UP POSITION......MUFFY & BUFFY STYLE. I WAS INTRODUCED TO HIM BECAUSE WE BOTH LIVE IN VILLANOVA. WELL , HE'S A BLUE BLOOD AND I'M BLUE COLLAR.....ALOT DIFFERENT.  ANYWAY , EARLIER I SEMI-MISSED THE LAST STEP MYSELF DUE TO ITS DARK BUT RECOVERED EASILY. HERE COMES THE BLONDE LADY SEMI - STAGGERING. I KNOW THIS CAN'T BE GOOD. SO WITHOUT HER KNOWING I FOLLOW HER DOWN THE 3 STEPS.  I AM LITERALLY ON THE SAME STEP WITH HER AND WHEN SHE NOT ONLY MISSES HER FOOT ON THE LAST STEP BUT MISSES THE 2ND STEP. SHE GOES TUMBLING DOWN AND I REACT LIKE A CAT.  I REACH OUT MY ARM AND CATCH HER BY THE BICEP AND HOLD HER MID-AIR...........RIGHT BEFORE HER FACE WOULD OF SMASHED AGAINST THE 2 FOOT HIGH METAL RAILING. IF I DID NOT STOP HER FORWARD MOTION I FEEL SHE WOULD OF FLIPPED RIGHT OVER THE FRIGGIN' RAILING. 

  CONTINUED - THE HUSBAND SEES EVERYTHING AND SCREAMS OUT , " THAT'S IT !! YOU'RE GETTING OUT OF HERE !!! " I GUIDE HER TO A SEMI-STANDING POSITION WHERE FRIENDS AND THE HUSBAND ARE YELLING AT HER. SHE DOES NOT UNDERSTAND AND I CAN NOT HEAR HER UNTIL FRIENDS TELL ME SHE WANTS HER POCKETBOOK. I BREAK OUT A FLASHLIGHT FROM MY CELL PHONE AND SEVERAL OF US LOOK FOR IT.  THEY FIND THE POCKETBOOK AND LEAVE. NEITHER THE BLONDE LADY NOR THE HUSBAND THANKED ME FROM SAVING HER FACE FROM BEING BROKEN OR FLIPPING OVER THE RAILING ONTO THE SECTION OF PEOPLE BELOW.

   SUNDAY     7 - 29 - 18

  CRAIGSLIST STRIKES AGAIN.

  ALWAYS KINDA SUCKS GETTING BACK INTO THE GRIND BUT TODAY SOME THINGS GOT DONE. A FRIEND/BARTENDER DROPS OFF A HAMSTER FOR US TO TAKE CARE OF WHILE SHE IS ON VACATION.  THE LITTLE VARMINT SCARED THE BEJESUS OUT OF ME WHEN IT RAN ON ITS WHEEL.  IT SQUEAKED SO LOUD I ACTUALLY JUMPED. MY KIDS LAUGHED. LATER I WOULD LUBRICATE THE SQUEAKY WHEEL.

  FOR 2 WEEKS I HAVE BEEN LOOKING FOR NEW CUTTING BOARD INSERTS FOR OUR BACK SINK AREA AT THE NAIL. I WAS LOOKING FOR GRANITE OR CORIAN. I GOT ESTIMATES FROM PEOPLE I KNEW , BUSINESSES I KNEW , AND MY GOOD FRIEND CRAIGSLIST. PRICES WERE RANGING FROM $15 - $200.  I SPEND MORE MONEY EACH MONTH THAN ANY ONE I KNOW YET I GET CALLED CHEAP OR FRUGAL.  WELL , TODAY I GUESS I WAS CHEAP. EVEN MARK CUBAN , OWNER OF THE DALLAS MAVERICKS , WHO IS A BILLIONAIRE SAID , " I DON'T CARE WHO YOU ARE , GETTING STUFF FOR FREE FEELS GOOD. "  I CONTACTED THIS NICE OLDER GENTLEMEN WHO LIVED VERY CLOSE TO THE NAIL. HE KNEW OUR BAR AND THAT MADE IT AN EASY EXCHANGE. HE HAD TWO LARGE PIECES OF SHARK GREY CORIAN COUNTERTOPS SITTING ON HIS FRONT PORCH FOR A LONG TIME. HE TOLD ME , " JUST STOP BY AND TAKE THEM. " WHEELS AND I DRIVE THERE , MET HIM AND HIS CAT , AND ROLLED HOME. I DON'T CARE WHAT PEOPLE SAY .......FREE IS GOOD.

  SOOTH THE POISON IVY. MY ELDEST IS NOW EQUAL TO ME IN THE PAIN OF THIS DAMN POISON IVY. SHE IS USING A ALOE GEL AND OATMEAL BATHS WHILE I USE CALADRYL , OCEAN WATER , AND SWIMMING POOLS WITH CHLORINE. I AM HEALING 3 TIMES FASTER. OFF TO THE POOL WHERE THE COOL WATER FEELS SO DAMN GOOD. THERE IS A FAIR AMOUNT OF PEOPLE HERE BUT IT IS NICE. ONE YOUNG GUY SPLASHING HIS MOM AND DOING CANNON BALLS NEAR HER WAS ENTERTAINING. I ALSO EXERCISED.

  SHOULDA DID THIS. DRIVING HOME FROM THE POOL I SUDDENLY SAY TO WHEELS , " WE SHOULD TURN AROUND. I REALLY THINK WE SHOULD TURN AROUND. "  SHE DOESN'T SEE ANYWHERE TO TURN THE CAR AROUND BUT ASKS WHY ? I SAY , " I JUST SAW 3 DEER IN A DRIVEWAY AND ONE WAS A LARGE BUCK IN VELVET.....A VERY LARGE BUCK. " WE JUST DROVE HOME AND I MUST SAY THAT IS A RARE SIGHT TO SEE A BUCK IN VELVET. NEXT TIME I WILL TAKE THE TIME. IT WOULD OF BEEN SUPER COOL IF I GOT A PICTURE OF IT.

  BACK HOME I SPRAY THE DAMN WEEDS THAT GAVE ME AND MY KIDS POISON IVY. THIS IS 2 DAYS IN A ROW. I WILL CONTINUE TO GO GODZILLA ON THEM. WHAT IS THE PURPOSE OF THIS HORRIBLE PLANT ?

  PHILLIES LOSE AGAIN JUST LIKE I SAID. THEY LOSE 3 OF 4 TO THE LAST PLACE REDS......BLOW.

  TAKE A RIDE TO THE NAIL ON MY MOTORCYCLE. I STOP AT A GAS STATION TO FILL UP. A BEAUTIFUL RIDE AND I GET TO THE NAIL. THE NUMBERS FROM FRIDAY NIGHT WERE GOOD BUT SATURDAY NIGHT WAS NOT. THIS PUT ME IN A BAD MOOD. THE BANDS CANCELLING JUST IRKS ME SO MUCH. FROM A HUGE NIGHT TO A NIGHT WE SHOULD OF BEEN CLOSED. I GET SOME THINGS DONE AND ROLL HOME TIRED.

  YOUNGEST COMES HOME FROM SEASHORE. SHE WAS STAYING AT A FRIENDS HOUSE IN BRIGANTINE AND MAN DOES THIS FAMILY KNOW HOW TO DO THE BEACH.  WHERE THEY GO TRUCKS CAN ACCESS THE BEACH. SO THEY HAVE A SPECIALTY BUILT TRUCK RACKS FOR THE BEACH. IT CARRIES HAMMOCKS , SITTING AREA , BBQ , CHAIRS , AND MORE.  THEY DRIVE 1 MILE RIGHT TO THE BEACH AND SET UP EVERYTHING IN SECONDS. THAT IS DAMN COOL.

  I ARRIVE HOME AND TRY TO CATCH A NAP......NOT HAPPENING. WE DO A FAMILY DINNER AT CHILI'S WHERE A FRIEND IS WORKING. OF COURSE I HAD TO PLAY A LITTLE.  KIDS TELL ME , " DADDY , PLEASE DON'T' AND HOLD MY SHIRT. BUT HOLDING BACK A 280 POUND GUY IS KINDA TOUGH. 

  STORY 1 :

  MY YOUNGEST SAYS , " THAT'S MY FRIEND A _ _ _. " I REPLY , " THE GUY IN THE BAND WHO IS PLAYING THE NAIL AND NEVER RETURNED MY PHONE CALL ? "  SHE RESPONDS , " UMM , NO , THAT'S NOT HIM AT ALL. " I APPROACH THE YOUNG KID AND ASK , " ARE YOU A _ _ _ ? " HE SAYS YES. I REPLY , " SO I CALL YOU AND YOU NEVER RETURN MY CALL ? I OWN THE RUSTY NAIL AND YOUR BAND WAS SUPPOSE TO BE PLAYING IN AUGUST . I DO NOT APPRECIATE THE NO CALL BACK ESPECIALLY SINCE YOUR FRIENDS WITH MY DAUGHTER." HE STUTTERS AND SAYS , " OH , I HAVE BEEN HAVING TROUBLE RECEIVING MESSAGES FROM MY CELL PHONE. "  I RESPOND , " BOY I CAN'T TELL YOU HOW MANY PEOPLE I KNOW HAVE TROUBLE WITH GETTING THEIR MESSAGES. HOW ABOUT THIS..............DID YOU SEE THE ' MISSED CALL ' ON YOUR CELL OR WAS THAT HARD TO RETRIEVE TOO ?  I WAS JOKING WITH HIM BUT HE KNEW I WAS SEMI SERIOUS.

  STORY 2 :

  ANOTHER FRIEND OF MY YOUNGEST WAS THERE. I WALK BY HER AND HER FRIENDS AND SHE SMILES AT ME. THIS GIRL IS ABSOLUTELY ONE OF THE CUTEST KIDS I KNOW. SHE IS OVER THE TOP ADORABLE. I SAY TO MYSELF , " WHY DID THIS YOUNG TEENAGE GIRL JUST SMILE AT ME ? " WE SIT AT A TABLE RIGHT NEXT TO THEM AND MY YOUNGEST SAYS , " DAD , THAT S _ _ _ _ _ . DO YOU REMEMBER HER ? " I REACT HUGELY AND SAY , " OH MY GOD YES !! "  I YELL OUT HER NAME AND SHE SPINS TO TALK TO ME. I EXPLAIN WHY I MISSED HER SMILE TO ME AND SHE GIGGLES. I ALSO TOLD HER JUST YESTERDAY I HAD A FACEBOOK " MEMORY " AND SHE WAS IN IT WITH 5 FRIENDS AND MY DAUGHTER AT OUR MOUNTAIN HOUSE. SHE TALKED TO US FOR A MINUTE OR SO AND IT WAS GOOD TO SEE HER. SHE WAS WITH A GIRL FRIEND WHO WAS CUTE TOO AND BOTH NOW HAVE BOYFRIENDS.....WHICH I DIDN'T LIKE.

   BEFORE ARRIVING , IN THE PARKING LOT , THE KIDS SEE A HUSKY PUP IN A CAR WITH ALL THE WINDOWS DOWN. WE ARE THINKING THIS IS NOT RIGHT AND THEY PET THE DOG. BUT , 1 MINUTE LATER THE OWNERS COME OUT.....THEY WERE JUST GETTING TAKE-OUT.

  I ALSO JOKED WITH OUR WAITRESS WHO IS BEST FRIENDS WITH MY ELDEST.

  BACK HOME WE WIND DOWN THE NIGHT. I HAVE NO BOOZE. BY 11:30PM IT WAS OFF TO SLEEP. I GET A TEXT FROM MY ELDEST AROUND 5:50AM ABOUT A PATRON WHO COMPLAINED ABOUT SOMETHING AT THE NAIL......NICE.

  OH , RIGHT BEFORE BED MY YOUNGEST AND I OIL THE EXTREMELY LOUD SQUEAKY WHEEL FOR THE HAMSTER. MY KID TELLS ME THAT WHEEL HAS BEEN SQUEAKING FOR YEARS.

  OH , ANOTHER BAND CANCELED FOR THIS SATURDAY.

  MONDAY     7 - 30 - 18

  THE BRAIN REALLY WORKS IN MYSTERIOUS WAYS..............

  GOT THE BALL ROLLING TODAY WITH SEVERAL THINGS. MY MAIN CONCENTRATION IS ALWAYS BANDS BUT BETWEEN SUMMER VACATIONERS AND BANDS CANCELLING IT IS SO DAMN FRUSTRATING.  I CALL AND EMAIL AND NO CONTACT BACK.......SO DAMN FRUSTRATING.

  WORKED ON CUTTING 2 PIECES OF MY " CRAIGSLIST " CORIAN I GOT YESTERDAY WITH WHEELS.  I LIKE THE SLATE GREY COLOR AND TODAY I BROKE OUT THE HORSES , MEASURING TAPE , AND CIRCULAR SAW.  I HAD TO SLIGHTLY FABRICATE BOTH PIECES TO FIT PROPERLY AT THE NAIL'S KITCHEN AREA.  I GLUED AND WEIGHTED THEM FOR OVER 6 HOURS. AFTER ABOUT A SOLID HOUR OF MANUFACTURING THESE PIECES I CLEANED UP , TURNED OFF THE MUSIC , AND BROUGHT THE PUP INSIDE WITH ME.  I ENJOY THESE LITTLE PROJECTS.

  TOOK 2 PICTURES OF A GIANT MUSHROOM IN OUR YARD. I REALLY LIKE TO SAUTEE IT BIG TIME BUT NO IDEA IF IT SAFE. I POSTED IT ON FACEBOOK FOR HELP.

  MADE A DEAL WITH MY ELDEST TO PUSH THE KID TO GET A JOB IN HER COLLEGE AREA. SHE CONTACTED 5 BAR/RESTAURANTS , FILLED OUT 3 APPLICATIONS , AND HAD ONE INTERVIEW. IT IS A GOOD START.

  BACK INSIDE TO DO MY PRE-PLANNING FOR WHEELS AND I 30TH ANNIVERSARY.  THERE IS A GOOD CHANCE WHEELS AND I WILL BE EXPERIENCING THE " MEGA BUS " AND THE THEATRE SHOW " WICKED ".

  LAY DOWN AND BEGIN TO WATCH A MOVIE CALLED " BATTLE OF THE SEXES ". I FELL ASLEEP BUT RE-WATCHED IT WHEN I WOKE. IT IS SLOW MOVING BUT DOES HAVE SOME GOOD PARTS. IT IS THE CONTROVERSIAL MATCH BETWEEN TENNIS PLAYERS BILLY JEAN KING AND BOBBY RIGGS. I REMEMBER THIS EVENT WHEN I WAS IN MY TEENS. THE ONLY REASON I STARTED WATCHING IT WAS I GOT INTO TENNIS AT A YOUNG AGE AND PLAYED COMPETITIVELY. ACTUALLY , AT 13 YEARS OLD , I WAS THE YOUNGEST PLAYER TO GET INTO THE PHILADELPHIA UNDER 25 TENNIS CHAMPIONSHIP. I LOST 6 - 1 , 6 - 1 , TO A 24 YEAR OLD........BLOW. THE SAME YEAR I DID WIN THE DOUBLES CHAMPIONSHIP WITH MY BROTHER. ANYWAY , THAT IS THE REASON FOR WATCHING THIS MOVIE AND I REMEMBER THIS CIRCUS EVENT VERY WELL. STEVE CARELL STARS AS BOBBY RIGGS AND EMMA STONE AS BILLY JEAN KING. SOME OTHER STARS ARE IN IT TOO LIKE SARAH SILVERMAN AND ELIZABETH SHUE. OVERALL........A SLOW BUT GOOD MOVIE IF INTO TENNIS AND LESBIANS.

  OFF TO THE NAIL TO CLEAN. YEP......SO NOT FUN DOING STUFF ALL DAY SINCE 6AM AND THAN HAVE TO WORK A NIGHT SHIFT. SO HERE WE GO.....I'M TIRED:

 - LOAD UP MY JEEP AND HEADED TO THE DIVE BAR.

 - FIXED A SUPER ANNOYING BACK GATE WINDOW ON THE JEEP BY SHIMMING IT AND CUTTING IT TO SIZE. IT IS ALMOST AS ANNOYING AS THE HAMSTER WHEEL. BUT IT WORKED EXCELLENT.

 - AT HOME I SPRAY PAINTED A SMALL METAL STANDING SHELF FOR OUTSIDE HERE. I PLACED AN ASHTRAY ON TOP. I BELIEVE IF I HAD 30 ASHTRAYS OUTSIDE PEOPLE WOULD STILL LITTER.

 - CHANGED THE MARQUEE LETTERS. MY LEGS GOING UP AND DOWN THIS LADDER MAY HAVE AN EXPIRATION DATE COMING UP VERY SOON.

 - REMOVED EVERYTHING IN THE BACK KITCHEN SINK AREA.  USING BRILLO PADS , GREEN SCRUFFY PADS , PINK SOAP , RUBBER GLOVES , AND A GARDEN HOSE I CLEANED ALL 3 SINKS. THIS IS SIMILAR TO CLEANING A DIRTY OVEN......NOT FUN. FLOORS WERE WET SO I HAD TO SET UP AN OSCILLATING FAN.

 - DID A LITTLE PROJECT THAT IS NOT FUN........I WON'T EVEN GET INTO IT....THINK URINAL.

 - INSTALLED THE NEW GREY SLATES OF CORIAN. THEY FIT PERFECTLY AND LOOK A 100X BETTER THAN WHAT WAS THERE. NO ONE CARES BUT IT MEANT SOMETHING TO ME.

 - SENT EMAILS OUT TO FRIENDS ABOUT TRAVELING TO ANOTHER STATE. NONE GOT BACK TO ME.

 - LABELED AND STOWED 12 NEW......WELL FIXED........MIC CORDS.

 - COMPLETELY PUT EVERYTHING BACK TOGETHER IN THE KITCHEN AREA.

 - HOSED DOWN THE JEEP.

 - THREW OUT OLD COUNTERTOPS FROM THE KITCHEN AREA. MY ASS WAS CLEANER THAN THEM.

 - AND SOME MORE COMPUTER PROJECTS.

  WATCHED THE PHILLIES LOSE. I ABSOLUTELY KNEW THEY LOSE IN THE 13TH INNING. I PICKED UP THE REMOTE AND CHANGED THE CHANNEL. THIS YOUNGEST TEAM IN THE M.L.B. IS OVERACHIEVING BIG TIME.....ALONG WITH A WEAK DIVISION.

  BACK HOME I MAKE A GIN & MANGO/LIME SPARKLING WATER DRINK WITH LEMONS AND LIMES. OH MY GOD IT ARE SO DAMN GOOD !!.............BLOW.

  I AM JUST AMAZED I MAINTAIN A 280 POUND BODY AND EAT SO FUCKING CAREFULLY. DROPPING BEER AND BRANDY HAS DONE DICK......BLOW.  WHEELS AND I ARE SITTING IN OUR YOUNGEST ROOM WHILE THE PUP IS ON THE BED WITH HER. WHEELS SEES ME LOOKING AT THE MIRROR AND THAN MY BODY. I DO THIS LIKE 4 TIMES. BACK AND FORTH I LOOK. FINALLY , I WAVE WITH MY HANDS DOWN MY BODY AND SAY , " I DON'T UNDERSTAND IT. I LOOK DOWN HERE AND I SEEM OKAY. I MEAN I CAN SEE MY FEET AND BELLY SEEMS SEMI-FLAT ( WHILE SITTING AND FLAT LIKE THE EARTH ). THAN I LOOK INTO THIS MIRROR AND I LOOK HUGE. " THE VIEW IS SIDEWAYS IN THE MIRROR OF ME AND MY GOD I LOOK LIKE I HAVE A 70 INCH WAIST. I SWEAR IT WAS LIKE A WAVY CIRCUS MIRROR.

  OH , THE " BRAIN " COMMENT TO START THIS BLOG. I HAD THIS VIVID SEXUAL DREAM THIS MORNING WITH ACTRESS JENNIFER LAWRENCE. SHE IS SUCH A PIECE OF ASS IN THE MOVIE " PASSENGERS " WHICH I WATCHED 300 TIMES. JESUS , WHO THE HELL WOULDN'T WANT TO BE ON A GIGANTIC SPACE SHIP WITH JUST HER. ANYWAY , I WOKE UP WITH A " RAGER ". GOOD GOD I COULD OF HAMMERED TELEPHONE POLE PYLONS INTO THE GROUND WITH THIS THING. I COULD NOT WALK INTO THE KITCHEN WITH THIS BASEBALL BAT IN MY BOXERS SO I TOOK OFF MY SHIRT AND LOOKED IN MY BEDROOM MIRROR. A SMALL TEAR TRAVELED DOWN MY CHEEK. MY BEST MANHOOD EVER WILL NOT BE COMING BACK.

  TUESDAY       7 - 31 - 18

  AND JULY IS GONE......DAMN IT. THINK I NEED TO GET AWAY.

  MID-MORNING I HEAD TO THE NAIL TO RECEIVE A BEER ORDER. THE MOTORCYCLE RIDE WITH MY YOUNGEST IS THE BEST PART......PURE JOY.

  BACK HOME I WEED AGAIN. OH GOOD GOD. THIS TIME IT IS THE RABBIT / VEGETABLE GARDEN. I WEED ABOUT 75% AND MY YOUNGEST FOLLOWS ME WITH SEEDING. WE LEFT 25% FOR THE RABBIT. YES , WE ARE SUPER LATE WITH PLANTING STUFF BUT HOPEFULLY THESE TOMATOES , CUCUMBERS , AND BROCCOLI WILL GROW......WITH A RABBIT LIVING IN THE GARDEN. YEP , THAT WOULD BE A DOUBLE EDGED SWORD THERE.

  I POSTED A PICTURE OF OUR COMPLETELY EMPTY GARDEN WITH THE RABBIT IN IT. MY CAPTION WAS " I WONDER WHY OUR GARDEN PRODUCED NO VEGETABLES THIS SEASON ? " FRIENDS ACTUALLY RESPONDED....IT WAS ENTERTAINING.

  GOT THE AUGUST CALENDARS SENT TO OUR PRINTING COMPANY.

  SET-UP AND GOT TOTALLY HOOKED UP AT GREAT ADVENTURED AMUSEMENT PARK. ALL INCLUSIVE RIDES AND V.I.P. TREATMENT FOR FREE. I TELL MY YOUNGEST AND WE ARE EXCITED. THAN WHEELS CALLS AND SHOOTS IT ALL DOWN WITH LOGIC.......DAMN IT.

  SWEATING LIKE THE BEJESUS AFTER WEEDING AND PLANTING WHEELS ASKS IF I LIKE TO GO FOR A WALK........CRAP.

  SINCE I AM FAT I DECIDE TO WALK. I LIKE EXERCISING WITH WHEELS AND WALKING THE NEIGHBORHOOD. IT REALLY IS A BEAUTIFUL AREA HERE WITH VERY WIDE STREETS , BIG THICK HIGH TREES , AND SO QUITE. IT IS NICE AS WE TALK BUSINESS , LIFE , AND SEX POSITIONS WHEELS LIKES.

  BACK HOME I SHOWER. MY FEET AND KNEES HURT. THE WATER FEELS GOOD CASCADING OVER MY RUBBERY THICK SKIN AND YODA BELLY. FROM MY HEAD , SHOWER WATER TAKES APPROXIMATELY 18 SECONDS TO RUN DOWN MY ENTIRE BODY TO THE DRAIN.

  A NICE DINNER AND WE CHILL. IT WAS NICE NOT GOING TO THE NAIL AND I LET THE BARTENDER RE-OPEN.

  WATCH THE PHILLIES WIN AN EXCELLENT GAME OVER THE REDSOX....THE BEST TEAM IN BASEBALL.

   PHILLIES MAKE A TRADE WITH 70 MINUTES LEFT ON THE DEADLINE. THE CATCHER , ON THE DISABLED LIST , COULD BE A GOOD MOVE. AN EXPERT DESCRIBED HIM AS , " HE COULD BE THE 4TH HITTER OR " CLEAN UP " ON ANY TEAM IN THE M.L.B.......INCLUDING THE REDSOX. "

  IN BED BY 10PM....YES I WAS THAT EXHAUSTED. I DID HAVE 2 NIGHTCAPS OF GIN / LIME GRAPEFRUIT SODA SPARKLING WATER WITH LEMONS AND LIMES. I HEAR BEER AND BRANDY IS SIGNIFICANTLY ON THE DOWNFALL IN SALES.

  WOKE UP SEVERAL TIMES THROUGHOUT THE NIGHT......BLOW.

  WEDNESDAY      8 - 1 - 18

  WELP , NEW YORK SWINDLED ME AND I AM NOT EVEN THERE YET. 

  TAKE THIS ADVICE NOW !!!  NEVER GO THROUGH A 3RD PARTY FOR THEATRE OR CONCERT TICKETS. NEVER EVER NEVER EVER GO THROUGH A 3RD PARTY !! ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS GO TO THE VENUE AND THAN USE THEIR TICKET AGENCY.  NEVER EVER GO THROUGH A 3RD PARTY.  I OVER PAID BIG TIME FOR " WICKED " BROADWAY TICKETS. ABOUT $100 OVER REGULAR PRICE. THEY ARE FUCKING THIEVES TO SAY THE LEAST. AND.............NO REFUNDS AT ALL.  I AM NOW THINKING WE DID THE SAME THING FOR 21 PILOT TICKETS SEVERAL YEARS AGO. MAN , DID I LEARN MY LESSON.

  LOOKS LIKE CRAIGSLIST WILL STRIKE AGAIN. DETAILS TOMORROW.

  WENT TO THE BANK , THAN LIQUOR STORE , THAN THE NAIL , THAN D.M.I. HOME SUPPLY , THAN HOME , AND PLANTED MORE VEGETABLES.  OUR GARDEN NOW HAS SEEDS OF BROCCOLI , PEPPERS , STRING BEANS , 2 TYPES OF TOMATOES AND CUCUMBER. ALL TRYING TO GROW WITH A RABBIT IN THE ENCLOSURE. I AM NOT EXPECTING ANY VEGGIES THIS YEAR.

  AT THE NAIL I BROUGHT A HOSE AND CLEANED THE ICE MACHINE. FROM OUR BACK LOT I HAD TO CONNECT 2 HOSES TOGETHER TO REACH THE ICE MACHINE. I TOOK EVERY PIECE APART , CLEANED THEM , AND THAN HOSED THE BEJESUS OUT OF THE MACHINE. THIS WAS A FUN PROJECT.

  INSIDE I LAY DOWN FOR I ALREADY PUT IN A FULL DAY.  I WATCH A BAD MOVIE CALLED " EXTINCT " ON NETFLIX.  BAD CASTING AND ACTING WAS NOT THE BEST.

  KIDS TAKE A TRIP TO THE BEACH. WHEELS AND I HAVE A NICE DINNER OF HAMBURGER ( NO ROLL ) AND A AVOCADO SALAD. FROM OUTSIDE IN THE GARDEN , I HEARD THE RABBIT CALL ME A PUSSY.

  FACT - 2 OUT OF 3 PEOPLE IN THE U.S ARE CONSIDERED OBESE. I COUNT AS 2 PEOPLE.

  OFF TO THE NAIL TO DO PROJECTS AND STOCK LIQUOR.  LOTSA OF FUN.  BY 10PM PEOPLE STARTING COMING IN AND I ENJOYED THEM. 2 YOUNG GUYS TOTALLY MAKING JOKES AGAINST TWO OLDER GUYS WHO WANT TO PLAY SEROUS POOL......SO NOT HAPPENING. I ALSO HAD A MUSICIAN COME IN AND BOOKED A SHOW.

  ALMOST 1AM I HEAD HOME. I SAY HELLO TO THE RABBIT AND PEE ON A TREE NEAR IT. YEP......COULDN'T WAIT.  AGAIN , THE RABBIT SNICKERED AT ME. I BELIEVE I HEARD , " WHAT AN ASSHOLE PEEING NEAR MY HUTCH. "

  MAKE A GIN AND RASPBERRY / LIME SPARKLING WATER DRINK WITH LEMONS AND LIMES. I ENJOY SOME ALMONDS AND SUNFLOWER SEEDS.  THE HAMSTER GOING A 100 MPH ON ITS WHEELS LOOKED AT ME LIKE I WAS HIS BITCH.

  IN BED AROUND 2AM. FALL ASLEEP AND MY CELL PHONE GOES OFF WITH A TEXT AND I CAN'T FIND IT. I CURSE THE CELL PHONE AND GO BACK TO SLEEP BY 3AM.  UP AT 6:30AM.

  THURSDAY      8 - 2 - 18

  AND CRAIGSLIST STRIKES AGAIN. THIS WOULD BE IN THE TOP 5 BEST DEALS.

  A RENTER SMASHED THE CORNER OF OUR COOK TOP STOVE AT THE MOUNTAIN HOUSE.  THEY TRIED GLUING IT AND IT LOOKS HORRIBLE. SO , I PRICED THEM AT STORES. LOWES HAD THE BEST DEAL ...........$400. THEY WENT AS HIGH AS $900.  I BEGIN MY SEARCHING ON CRAIGSLIST. I USED GEOGRAPHICAL LOCATIONS FIRST..........PHILLY , POCONOS , AND DELAWARE. WOULDN'T YOU KNOW DELAWARE WOULD BE THE CONNECT ?  I FOUND 2 OTHERS FOR $150. ONE WAS SOLD AND ONE PERSON NEVER RESPONDED.......ASSHOLE.  WHY FUCKING POST SOMETHING AND NOT RESPOND TO CALLS OR EMAILS !!! DRIVES ME FUCKING NUTS. SORRY , ANYWAY , SO I SEARCHED DELAWARE.  FOUND A GUY REMODELING HIS HOME AND WANTED TO CONVERT FROM ELECTRIC TO GAS.  WE EMAILED BACK AND FORTH WITH ME BE THE QUICKER EVERY TIME.  WE FINALLY EXCHANGE CELL NUMBERS AND HE SAYS , " WOW , I HAD THIS ON CRAIGSLIST WITH NO RESPONSE. I WAS GOING TO TRASH IT YESTERDAY AT THE DUMP BUT I FORGOT. YOU CAN HAVE IT FOR $20. "  AND THE DEAL WAS DONE.

  DROVE TO DELAWARE BUT IT WAS RIGHT OVER THE BORDER. ONLY 7 MINUTES FROM THE BLUE ROUTE AND I -95 MEET.  A 22 MINUTE RIDE SAVED ME $400.

  DROVE TO MY PARENTS HOUSE TO PICK UP MY DAD. I WAS THERE IN 15 MINUTES. AGAIN , THE TIMING IS EXCELLENT. I DRIVE HIS CAR TO SOUTH PHILLY TO HAVE LUNCH WITH 2 AUNTS AND A COUSIN. OF COURSE I HAD TO FIX STUFF.

  BACK TO MY PARENTS HOUSE TO DROP DAD OFF. ON THE RIDE HOME IT WAS NICE TO HAVE HIM REMINISCE ABOUT WHEN HE WAS A KID , HAD A JOB , AND GOING TO THE MOVIES COST 12 PENNIES.

  I STOP AT THE NAIL TO TURN ON THE A/C AND CHECK MY ICE MACHINE THAT I DID A FULL CLEAN WITH YESTERDAY. IT IS NOT PRODUCING ICE THE WAY I LIKE IT TOO. I WORKED ON IT MORE THIS EVENING.

  AT HOME I DO SOME ODD JOBS AND LAY DOWN. I WATCH A SUPER HERO MOVIE CALLED " THOR : RAGNAROK ". IT WAS THE STUPIDEST OF ALL THE HERO FLICKS I SEEN SO FAR. THEY CASTED JEFF GOLDBLUM ?........C'MON MAN.

  SPRAY PAINT A PLASTIC ZIP TIE FROM WHITE TO BLACK. IT WILL SECURE A NEW OUTDOOR METAL SHELF AT THE NAIL.

  KIDS COME HOME FROM SEASHORE AND HAD A GREAT TIME.

  I HEAD TO THE NAIL AND BEGIN THE NORMAL CRAP. I DID NOT BRING A COMPUTER BECAUSE A BARTENDER IS COMING IN LATER TO RELIEVE ME. I EMPTY TRASH INTO OUR DUMPSTER ( WHICH MY NEIGHBORS USE WITHOUT ASKING ) AND CAN'T FIND MY BLACK ZIP TIE THAT I KNOW I LOADED IN MY CAR. AFTER 2 ATTEMPTS AND A TEXT TO WHEELS I FIND IT ON THE FLOOR UNDER THE PASSENGER FRONT SEAT......F'N AMAZING.

  EVERY TIME I WALK BY I LOVE THE NEW CUTTING BOARDS MORE IN THE BACK KITCHEN. A 1000X BETTER AND FREE ON CRAIGSLIST.

SPEAKING OF CRAIGSLIST , I WILL BE POSTING AN OLD SINGER SEWING MACHINE AND A MANTLE CLOCK FOR MY AUNT.

  MUSICIANS START TO FILE IN AND PLAY MUSIC UNTIL 12 MIDNIGHT.  IT WAS GOOD TO SEE AND HEAR.

  PHILLIES , FOR THE FIRST TIME THEY HAVE WON A GAME WHEN LOSING AFTER 8 INNINGS. THEY WERE 0 - 56. I AM WAITING FOR THE CALL TO THANK ME. YES , I MADE THEM WIN. DOWN 2 - 1 I FEEL GOOD ABOUT A COMEBACK WIN. I TELL THE PATRONS AND FRIENDS AT THE NAIL I AM GOING TO SIT BY THE DART BOARD AND WATCH THE GAME ON THE MAIN ROOM TV. I SAY , " I WILL CHANGE THEIR LUCK AND RUNS WILL BE SCORED !!! " I HAVE NO LIFE BUT I SAT IN THE MAIN ROOM.  PHILLIES CONTROL THE PITCH COUNT WITH 2 WALKS , A DRIBBLER HIT , A DRIBBLER GROUND OUT TO TIE THE GAME , AND THAN A WALK-OFF 3 RUN HOME RUN BY FRANCO. EVERYONE CHEERS AND THEY ALL YELL AT ME WITH PRAISE AND THANK YOU'S !!

  OH , THE BARTENDER GOT SICK AND I COVERED THE SHIFT. ONE HOUR LATER SHE WENT TO A FRIENDS HOUSE.

   MAN , NOT HAVING A COMPUTER BLOWS.

  AT MIDNIGHT I BEGIN SETTING UP FOR TOMORROW'S SHOW. I SET-UP WALL DIVIDERS , VACUUM EVERYWHERE , BRING ASHTRAYS IN ( TOMORROW IS A NON SMOKING EVENT ) , AND PREP AS MUCH AS I COULD. BY 1AM , I AM EXHAUSTED. I TEST/DRINK A HALF A CUP OF SAM ADAMS SEASONAL AND BEGIN TO CLOSE. I ROLL OUT AND LET MY DOORMAN/BARTENDER CLOSE FOR ME.

  AT HOME I MAKE A NIGHTCAP OF MANGO / LIME AND GIN WITH LEMONS AND LIMES. OH MY GOD IT WAS THE PERFECT WAY TO END A NIGHT. A COLD BEER AND BRANDY WOULD OF SUCKED ASS. I NEVER FINISH MY DRINK AND GO TO BED...........WHERE A DOG IS ON MY HALF OF THE BED ACROSS MY PILLOWS WEARING MY C-PAP MACHINE MASK. I HEAR A TAIL WAGGING IN THE DARK AND I SMILE. IT WARMS ME THAT SOMETHING IS WAITING FOR ME IN MY BED.

  MY YOUNGEST COMES IN TO SAY GOOD NIGHT AND SNUGGLES WITH THE PUP. THESE ARE THE MOMENTS I LOVE.

  2 NIGHTS AGO WHEELS AND I WATCHED AN ITALIAN COMEDIAN KINDA LIKE A SOFTER VERSION OF ANDREW DICE CLAY. HIS NAME WAS SEBASTIAN MANISCALCO. HE WAS PRETTY GOOD.  MY FAVORITE JOKE WAS ......." MY PARENTS ARE FROM ITALY AND RIGHT OFF THE BOAT. THEY HAD VERY STRONG WORK ETHICS. MY FATHER HAD A FULL TIME JOB AT THE AGE OF 4. I'M WATCHING CARTOONS AND MY FATHER WALKS UP TO ME AND SMACKS ME ON THE HEAD WITH HIS FIST. HE YELLS AT ME , " WHADDAYA DOIN ???!!! GO STARTA BUSINESS ".........I WAS 6 YEARS OLD."

  I AM AT OUR SCHOOL'S CAFETERIA AND PEOPLE ARE SCRAMBLING TO GET IN LINE FOR FOOD. I DECIDE TO JUST WAIT AND CHILL. I WATCH A BLACK GUY WALK UP AND BYPASS THE ENTIRE LINE. NO ONE CARES OR SAYS A WORD OR GIVES A BAD LOOK AT HIM FOR DOING IT.  I SAY TO MYSELF , " MAN , THAT IS A DICK MOVE. " THE GUY WALKS OVER TO MY TABLE AND SITS. HE KNOWS I GAVE HIM A LOOK OF DISAPPROVAL. HE TURNS TO ME AND SAYS , " HEY MAN , I'M FREDDIE BOOM-BOOM WASHINGTON. I CAN DO ANYTHING I WANT. ".............dream ends.

       ( I AM DATING MYSELF IF YOU KNOW WHO THAT CHARACTER WAS )

  FRIDAY     8 - 3 - 18

   LONG DAY AND NIGHT........LEGS HURTING AGAIN.

   RAIN .....SUN......RAIN.....SUN......RAIN............3 TIMES MOVING THE RABBIT IN AND OUT.

   GO TO THE NAIL AND THE GATE IS NOT WORKING AGAIN. EVERY TIME IT RAINS IT SEEMS TO BREAK.

   OFF TO THE NAIL FOR ANOTHER BEER DELIVERY.  OF COURSE I DO SOME MORE THINGS BUT GLAD I GOT ALOT DONE LAST NIGHT.

   BACK HOME I MUST REST. I PLAY WITH THE PUP AND DECIDE TO PUT NEW DRIVEWAY LIGHTS TOGETHER.  THEY WILL CHARGE DURING THE DAY WHEN THE SUN IS OUT.  I ALSO DO SOME GARAGE PROJECTS.

  INSIDE I LAY DOWN AND WATCH " ORANGE IS THE NEW BLACK " WITH MY ELDEST. I FELL ASLEEP SEVERAL TIMES BUT 2 CHARACTERS I DO LIKE ARE IN THE SHOW...........THE HOT RED HEAD FROM " THAT 70'S SHOW " AND THE GIRL FROM " ONE DAY AT A TIME ". SHE WAS VALERIE BERTONELLI'S SISTER.

  ELDEST AND I HEAD TO THE NAIL AND PREP FOR THE NIGHT. WE LOAD BANDS IN AND THE SHOW STARTS WONDERFULLY WITH AN OLD SCHOOL BLUES BAND. FROM THERE.......METAL.

  MY YOUNGEST AND MY ELDEST FRIEND / BARTENDER HELP US TOO....AND WE NEEDED IT. BANDS THROWING 100'S OF PLASTIC BALLS , POOL NOODLES , AND NOISE POPPERS WAS SOMETHING TO SEE. I WAS THROWING THEM AND THE BARTENDERS AND OTHER WORKERS WHILE THEY THREW THEM BACK AT ME. SOME WENT OUT ONTO HAVERFORD ROAD......TOO FUNNY.

  ROLL OUY BY 2AM AND WIND DOWN AT HOME. I MAKE A GIN & LIME SODA WATER WITH LEMONS AND LIMES.  BY 3:45AM I WAS HEADING TO BED.

  PHILLIES WITH A GOOD WIN AND FUN GAME. SOME PEOPLE WHO ATTENDED THE GAME CAME INTO THE NAIL.....ALL DRESSED IN PHILLIES ATTIRE.

  OH , IT IS ALUMNI WEEKEND AND IN " OUR " SUITE WAS CHARLIE MANUEL , CHOOCH , BRETT MYERS , AND PROBABLY MORE......DAMN IT.

  I FIND OUT TV CHANNEL A.M.C. IS RELEASING SEASON 8 FOR " THE WALKING DEAD ". THE ONLY PROBLEM IS THE 1ST EPISODE IS AT 2:45AM SUNDAY NIGHT. EITHER I USE MY SLEEP APNEA TO ITS MAX OR FIND A WAY TO RECORD IT.

    SATURDAY        8 - 4 - 18

  WEAPON X , B-DAWK , THE MAN...............

  THE HALL OF FAME INDOCTRINATION OF PHILADELPHIA EAGLE BRIAN DAWKINS WAS SOMETHING TO SEE. WE KNEW DAWKINS WOULD BE PASSIONATE BUT HE STOLE THE SHOW. OH , AND SO DID THE EAGLES FANS. THERE WERE MORE EAGLES FANS THAN ALL THE OTHER INDUCTEES FANS................COMBINED.

  TERRELL OWENS ALSO WAS INDUCTED BUT HE DECIDED TO BE A JERK-OFF.  HE CELEBRATED AT HIS HOME COLLEGE OF CHATTANOOGA ASS TEXAS.  HE SAID IT WAS NOT ABOUT HOW MANY TIMES HE WAS VOTED TO GET IN BUT THE SPORT WRITER'S PROCESS.  GOOD CALL T.O......GOOD CALL.

  THE OTHER INDUCTEES ALL GAVE GOOD SPEECHES BUT I THOUGHT RAY LEWIS WAS OVER THE TOP WITH BEING TO " PREACHER-LIKE " BY WALKING THE PLATFORM AND HAVING HIS OWN CORDLESS HEADSET.  OH , AND HE SWEATED LIKE 10 MEN.

  NEED VCR TAPES..........WHY ? I FOUND OUT MY DUAL TV/VCR CAN RECORD SHOWS. ALL I NEEDED WAS VCR TAPES. I KNOW I HAVE THEM AT THE NAIL AND I RODE MY BIKE WITH MY YOUNGEST. WE GET EVERYTHING DONE , THAN RIDE TO MCDONALDS ( I HAD NOTHING ) , AND GET HOME. IT WAS THAN I REALIZE I FORGOT TO GET THE VCR TAPES. IT WAS THE SOLE REASON OF GOING THERE. #WORSEMEMORYEVER.

  MY BACK-UP IS MY MOM WHO WILL RECORD THE 8TH SEASON OF " THE WALKING DEAD " FOR ME.

  PHILLIES WINNING AGAINST THE WORSER TEAM. BRAVES LOSING AGAINST THE METS HELPS TOO.

  "  WORSER ?".......IS THAT A WORD ?

  WHEELS GOES TO A MAGNIFICENT FLOWER AND COY POND AND SO MUCH GARDEN. IT IS A 1 MILE WALK ON HUNDREDS OF ACRES. OUR YOUNGEST HAD TO GO FOR A SUMMER ART PROJECT. LITTLE DID WE KNOW THIS AMAZING JEWEL WAS ONLY 3 MILES FROM OUR HOME.

   I LET 12 NEW DRIVEWAY LIGHTS SIT OUTSIDE TO CHARGE.  THIS WAS 2 NIGHTS AGO. MY YOUNGEST HELPS ME EXCHANGE ALL THE DRIVEWAY LIGHTS AROUND OUR GARDENS......WHICH WAS BASICALLY OF THEM EXCEPT 4.  IT WAS KINDA COOL TO DO IT AT NIGHT. THE PUP WAS WITH US TOO.

  I HANG WITH MY YOUNGEST IN HER ROOM A LITTLE BIT. ENJOY EVERY SECOND.

  WHEELS AND I WATCH THE INDUCTEE CELEBRATION FOR THE PHILLIES PLAYER ROY HALLADAY AND PAT GILLICK. THE SPEECHES WERE HEART BREAKING ESPECIALLY FROM THE WIFE.  IF THERE WAS ONE WEEKEND WE SHOULD OF BEEN THERE AND IN THE SUITE...........IT WAS THIS WEEKEND.  BUT TO SHOW YOU HOW MUCH WE HAVE LEVERAGE OR POWER............. 33 YEARS IN THIS FAMILY AND WHEELS ( EVEN LONGER ) AND WE CAN'T GO ON OUR OWN. KINDA PUTS THINGS INTO PERSPECTIVE DOESN'T IT. WE ARE ABSOLUTELY 2 COMPLETELY DIFFERENT ENTITIES AND THAT WILL NEVER CHANGE. #ALWAYSBLUECOLLAR.

  I HAVE NO IDEA HOW TO USE HASH TAGS.

  OFF TO BED BY 11:45PM......WITH THE PUP.  I SLEPT GOOD AND DID WAKE UP AT 2:15AM. I THOUGHT ABOUT WATCHING " THE WALKING DEAD " SEASON OPENER AT 2:45AM BUT FIGURED I WANTED TO ENJOY IT AND NOT WATCH IT HALF ASLEEP.

  SUNDAY        8 - 5 - 18

  GOT THE POOL TO OURSELVES.....KINDA COOL.

  LOAD UP 2 VEHICLES AND HEAD TO VISIT A FAMILY MEMBER.  ONE THING I ABSOLUTELY LOVE DOING IS BRINGING WALKIE TALKIES.  THIS WAS FUN AS BOTH DRIVERS COULD TALK TO EACH OTHER WHILE DRIVING. WELL , THE RULE WAS THE PASSENGERS USED THE WALKIE TALKIES. IT REALLY PASSES THE TIME AND IT IS FUN ESPECIALLY WHEN I SANG ELVIS PRESLEY " YOU AIN'T NOTHING BUT A HOUND DOG. " WELL , THE KIDS MIGHT OF THOUGHT DIFFERENT.

  TAKE A FAMILY MEMBER OUT TO LUNCH. THE SELECTION........PIZZA HUT.  NO DOUBT MY FAVORITE PIZZA. THEY ALSO LET OUR PUP IN WHICH WAS COOL BECAUSE WE DID NOT WANT TO LEAVE HER IN THE CAR.

   BACK ON THE ROAD AND WE SETTLE IN. ALL OF US WERE TIRED SO WE TOOK NAPS. 

   WATCHED THE PHILLIES WIN AGAIN. THESE " WINNABLE " GAMES ARE A MUST IF THEY WANT TO KEEP IN THE PLAYOFF PICTURE.  PHILLIES ARE SOLIDIFYING THIS TEAM WITH SOME GOOD TRADES OF EXPERIENCED AND SOLID PLAYERS.

   PRETTY COOL - PHILLIES FIRST BASEMAN CARLOS SANTANA PULLED A BABE RUTH PROMISE. BEFORE THE GAME A YOUNG BOY WITH LEUKEMIA WAS GIVEN A BAT & BALL ALONG WITH TAKING PICTURES. HIS FAVORITE PLAYER SANTANA GREETED HIM WITH THE BAT & BALL.  THEY TALKED ABIT , TOOK PICTURES , AND SANTANA SAID TO THE KID , " I'LL HIT A HOMER FOR YOU. " WELP , IN THE 8 - 3 WIN SEVERAL DAYS AGO HE DID JUST THAT. "  VERY NICE TO HEAR THESE STORIES.

  ALL 4 OF US HEAD TO THE POOL. EARLIER WE DROVE BY AND IT WAS PRETTY CROWDED.  WE DECIDED TO GO AROUND 6PM AND IT WAS PERFECT. A FAMILY OF 5 WERE THERE BUT LEFT WITHIN 20 MINUTES. ALSO , WE BROKE A RULE. THE POOL SAYS IT CLOSES AT 6PM AS WE PULLED UP IN THE CAR. I SAID , " IT'S TIME TO BREAK THE RULES. " WE STAYED UNTIL AFTER 7PM ALL BY OURSELVES AND IT WAS FUN.

  BACK HOME WE BBQ THICK PORK CHOPS. A FAMILY MEMBER GAVE THEM TO US.  SO DAMN GOOD. WE PLAYED MUSIC AND SAT OUTSIDE.....AT LEAST UNTIL THE MOSQUITOES ARRIVED.

   KIDS GO TO GET ICE CREAM ON " SISTERS DAY ". AT LEAST THAT'S WHAT THEY TOLD ME.

   WE PLAY CARDS FOR A COUPLE OF HOURS AND TELL STORIES AND TALK. IT WAS FUN AGAIN. LOVE SPENDING TIME WITH WHEELS AND THE KIDS.

  I BROKE DOWN BECAUSE IT WAS SUCH A BEAUTIFUL NIGHT AND DRANK BRANDY.....DAMN IT.  I HAD SOME BEERS TOO BUT EVENTUALLY CHANGED TO GIN & SODA WATERS. I WILL HOLD OFF ON BEER AND BRANDY FOR THE NEXT COUPLE OF DAYS.

  OFF TO BED AND MAN DID IT FEEL GOOD WHEN MY BODY HIT THE BED. I SLEPT PRETTY GOOD.

   MONDAY      8 - 6 - 18

  ESPN - " AND THAT WAS A HEART BREAKING LOSS FOR PHILADELPHIA ". YEP , NEVER HEARD THAT BEFORE.

  $5 TO THE WINNER. I HAD THE KIDS AND WHEELS WRITE DOWN GUESSES TO A SMALL SURPRISE I HAD FOR EVERYONE.  GUESSES RANGED FROM WATER PARKS TO AMUSEMENT PARKS TO SIGHT SEEING CAVES.

   WHEELS RUNS OVER THE RABBIT HUTCH. LUCKILY THE RABBIT WAS NOT IN THE HUTCH AT THE TIME.

  WE LOAD UP AND THE KIDS AND WHEELS BEGIN GUESSING WHERE WE ARE GOING. SOON HINTS WERE GIVEN OUT AND WHEELS GUESSED IT RIGHT.

  WE PARK FOR $5 AND THE ATTENDANT IS A HUGE EAGLES FAN. WHEELS IS WEARING HER EAGLES SHIRT AND HANDS HIM THE 5 BUCKS. HE SAYS , " I AM A HUGE EAGLES FAN. PARKING IS FREE FOR YOU !! ". HE TOOK OUR $5 ANYWAY.

  INSTRUCTED TO PARK IN LOT " B ".  IT WAS DAMN NEAR A 1/2 MILE AWAY. I GOT SUPER LUCKY AND FOUND A PARKING SPOT VERY CLOSE TO THE ENTRANCE SO I SAID TO MYSELF " F " PARKING LOT B. I LET EVERYONE OUT THINKING I HAD TO PARK FAR AWAY AND LET WHEELS GO BUY TICKETS. MY CELL PHONE GOES OFF AND WHEELS SAYS , " I FORGOT TO GIVE YOU THE PARKING RECEIPT FOR THE WINDSHIELD. "  MY YOUNGEST WALKS IT TO ME AND WHEELS AND ELDEST GO GET TICKETS.

  MY SURPRISE IS ON A TRAIN........WE RIDE THE " OPEN AIR " SECTION OF THE TRAIN. I RECOMMEND THIS SINCE THIS IS A KINDA ONE TIME THING. THE TRAIN IS CALLED THE " LEHIGH GORGE SCENIC RAILROAD. " IT WAS A VERY NICE RIDE THROUGH OLD AREAS, WOODS , OVER BRIDGES , OVER RIVERS , WATERFALLS , AND MORE. FRIENDLY CONDUCTORS NARRATED THROUGHOUT THE 70 MINUTE TRIP.  THE TRAIN GOES 8 MILES , STOPS AND TRANSFER THE ENGINE TO THE OTHER END ( ABOUT 10-15 MINUTES ) , AND THAN BACK 8 MILES. IT WAS A HOT DAY BUT ONCE THE TRAIN MOVED THE AIR FELT GOOD.  I WAS SURPRISED THE TRAIN WAS FULL ON A MONDAY. IN FACT THE WHOLE TOWN WAS.

  AFTER THE RIDE WE TOOK PICTURES WITH A GUY IN A BLACK BEAR OUTFIT. THIS POOR BASTARD.......94 DEGREES OUT AND HE IS IN A FULL COSTUME.  WE ALSO TOOK PICTURES OF WOOD CUT-OUTS OF AN ENGINEER AND CONDUCTOR. OF COURSE , OUR KIDS VOLUNTEERED TO BE IN THE PICTURES AND A PHOTO WITH A 15,000 POUND ROCK FROM A COAL MINE. ALL PICTURES WERE POSTED ON FACEBOOK FOR FAMILY AND FRIENDS TO SEE.

  WE WALK AROUND THIS TOWN OF JIM THORPE AND IT IS PACKED WITH PEOPLE. WE VISITED 2 NOVELTY STORES AND PAY THREE TIMES AS MUCH AS A KMART OR WALMART. I DID TALK TO A NICE LADY WHO OWNED ONE OF THE STORES. WE ASKED HER WHERE SHE LIKES TO EAT. SHE IMMEDIATELY REPLIES , " ANTONIO'S " UP THE STREET. VERY GOOD PIZZA AND ITALIAN FOOD.

  WE WALK AND SIGHT SEE.  THIS AREA IS OLD BUT VERY COOL.  WE ENTER ANTONIO'S PIZZERIA INC. AND GET A TABLE. WE ORDER BRUSHETTA , STUFFED SHELLS , SHRIMP ALFREDO , MANICOTTI , AND 2 ORDERS OF GARLIC BREAD. THEY HAVE A LIQUOR LICENSE BUT WE DID NOT ORDER BEERS. THE FOOD AND SERVICE WAS VERY GOOD AND I EVEN TAGGED ANTONIO'S IN A FACEBOOK POST WITH A PICTURE OF OUR FOOD. THEY RESPONDED WITH A " THANK YOU ".

 OH , I USED MY COUSINS METHOD OF ORDERING AND HAD TO GET AT LEAST ONE SLICE OF PIZZA SINCE THIS IS WHAT THIS PLACE IS KNOWN FOR. I ASK THE WAITRESS TO SURPRISE ME. IT WAS A GREAT CALL. SHE BROUGHT OUT ONE SLICE OF LIGHTLY SAUCED SAUSAGE AND ONE OTHER KIND OF MEAT I FORGET THAT WAS SLIGHTLY DRIZZLED WITH BUFFALO WING SAUCE. IT WAS EXCELLENT.

  I HAD A 2ND SURPRISE BUT IT DID NOT DEVELOPE. IT WAS INVITING AN AUNT AND COUSIN THAT LIVE HERE BUT IT FELL THROUGH. OUR COUSIN DID COMMENT ON MY FACEBOOK PICTURES AND SAID , " SORRY I MISSED YOU GUYS ! ".

  WALK SOME MORE , STOP AT ANOTHER SHOP , AND OUTSIDE I SEE 30 COLLEGE GIRLS ALL WEARING SHORTS AND THE SAME MAROON JERSEYS OF.............SAINT JOE'S HAWKS SOCCER TEAM. THEY WERE ALL ADORABLE AND IN PERFECT SHAPE.  GOOD GOD I MISS BEING YOUNG.

  BACK TO THE CAR WE HEAD HOME. WE MAKE A QUICK PIT STOP TO TAKE SOME PICTURES OF THE JIM THORPE STATUE AND MEMORIAL GARDEN. ARGUABLY THE GREATEST ATHLETE OF ALL TIME. AGAIN I POST A PICTURE ON FACEBOOK.

  A 2ND PIT STOP AT " HAZEL BEER DISTRIBUTOR " RIGHT NEAR OUR HOUSE. THE SAME OLD LADY OWNER WAS THERE. SHE WAS IN HER 70'S BACK IN 1997 WHEN WE BUILT THIS HOUSE. SHE MUST BE OVER A 100 NOW.

  BACK HOME WE ARE GREETED BY THE PUP. AN ABSOLUTELY WONDERFULLY WAY OF BEING WELCOMED HOME. THIS DOG BRINGS SO MUCH JOY TO US.

  MOST OF US TAKE NAPS AND BY 7PM WE HEAD TO THE POOL. THE WATER WAS GLORIOUS AND AGAIN WE HAD FUN. I POSTED A PICTURE ON FACEBOOK FOR FAMILY AND FRIENDS TO SEE.

  AT THE POOL , THIS ONE SMOKING HOT HISPANIC GIRL WAS IN A BIKINI. SHE TAKES HER TIME DRYING OFF AND BEGINS TO PUT ON BLACK SPANDEX PANTS. I NEVER KNEW GIRLS ACTUALLY JUMP UP AND DOWN TO FORCE THE TIGHT FITTING SPANDEX OVER THEIR LOWER BODY.  I WAS GLAD I WITNESSED IT.

  FOR THE FIRST TIME WHEELS GOES INTO THE DEEP END OF THE POOL. THE DEPTH WAS ABOUT 10 FEET. IT WAS GOOD TO SEE HER IN THE DEEP END WITH ALL OF US. OH , SHE USED POOL NOODLES AS FLOATING DEVICES. THE JOKES AND LAUGHTER WERE PRETTY DAMN ENTERTAINING.

  BACK HOME THE KIDS TAKE A RIDE TO GET ALLERGY MEDICINE AND ICE CREAM.

  BACK AT THE HOUSE WE WATCH THE PHILLIES AND PLAY CARDS. IT WAS FUN TO JUST CHILL AGAIN.

  I HEAD TO BED AROUND MIDNIGHT. PHILLIES PITCHER ARRIETTA IS DOING PHENOMENAL BY THROWING A SHUT-OUT AFTER 8 INNINGS. IN BED I SEMI-WATCH THE PHILLIES GO UP 2 - 0 IN THE TOP OF THE 9TH INNING. I AM JUST TOO TIRED AND GO TO SLEEP. I SAY TO MYSELF , " THEY ARE GOING TO BLOW THIS LEAD. "

  I WAKE UP AT 4AM AND CAN NOT GO BACK TO SLEEP. I TURN ON ESPN AND THE FIRST THING I HEAR IS , " AND THIS WAS A HEART BREAKING LOSS FOR PHILADELPHIA AND A GREAT WIN FOR ARIZONA. " I FUCKING KNEW IT. PHILLIES RELIEVER SIRANTHONY BLOWS HIS 2ND SAVE OPPORTUNITY IN A ROW BY GIVING UP TWO 9TH INNING RUNS. PHILLIES LOSE IN 12 INNINGS.........FANS CRUSHED AGAIN. I ALSO HEARD THERE WAS A HUGE CONTINGENT OF PHILLY FANS IN ARIZONA.

 STRUGGLED FOR ABOUT AN HOUR WITH TV AND RADIO AND TRYING TO GET BACK TO SLEEP. I DID NOT WANT TO START MY DAY AT 4AM. FINALLY I FELL ASLEEP UNTIL 7:30AM.

  WHAT ARE THE CHANCES OF ME FINDING AN ELECTRIC COOK TOP ON CRAIGSLIST ? SLIM.....BUT I BOUGHT ONE FOR $20. BUT......WHAT ARE THE CHANCES OF THIS PURCHASED COOK TOP BEING THE EXACT SAME MAKE AND MODEL OF THE BROKEN ONE IN OUR HOME ? PROBABLY THE ODDS ARE A MILLION TO ONE. WELP , IT DOES MATCH AND I HOPE IT HELPS MAKE IT EASIER WITH INSTALLATION.

  WHEELS AND I SEE A BEAUTIFUL DOE AND A BABY FAWN. WE ALSO SEE A BLACK YOUNG CAT FOR THE 2ND TIME. THIS TIME THE CAT CAPTURES SOMETHING. MY GUESS IS A CHIPMUNK.

  TUESDAY        8 - 7 - 18

  GOOD AND BAD LUCK............ONE ALWAYS RISES ABOVE THE OTHER.

  FOR THE FIRST TIME IN 3 DAYS I GOT INTO " WORK " MODE. I NEEDED TO GET SOME THINGS DONE ON THE PUNCH LIST. HAVING HELP WAS EVEN BETTER.

  PUNCH LIST :

  - FOR 2 DAYS WHEELS CELL PHONE WAS NOT CHARGING. WE GOOGLED WHAT TO DO AND IT WORKED ( REMOVE BATTERY AND SIM CARD AND REPLACE ).  SO , 2 DAYS OF DOING THIS AND SHARING MY CHARGER AND THAN I NOTICED SOMETHING. THE HEATER CLOSET LIGHT WAS NOT WORKING. THE TOASTER WAS NOT WORKING. THE OUTLET WHEELS HAD HER CHARGER PLUGGED IN WAS NOT WORKING. I QUICKLY DIAGNOSED THE PROBLEM AND CONTACTED A PREVIOUS RENTER.  I GO TO THE CIRCUIT BREAKER BOX AND NOTICE JUST ONE BREAKER WAS LABELED....." KITCHEN OUTLETS ".  THE RENTER BEFORE US KNEW THE OUTLETS WERE HAVING PROBLEMS BUT NEVER TOLD US.

  CONTINUED - THE PREVIOUS RENTER CALLS ME AND THINKS IT IS A LOOSE OR BAD BREAKER. I TOLD HIM , " I ALREADY FIXED IT. ". SINCE I BUILT THE HOUSE I KNEW ONE OUTLET " JUMPS " TO THE NEXT. I GO TO THE 2ND OUTLET AND PULL IT OUT. IT IS FINE. I GO TO THE 1ST OUTLET AND THERE IS THE PROBLEM. IT IS BURNT OUT ON THE EDGES. I REPLACE THE OUTLET AND ALL POWER IS RESTORED. SO , DID I GET LUCKY FOR FINDING AND FIGURING OUT THIS SERIOUS PROBLEM OR TOTALLY UNLUCKY THIS EVEN HAPPENED ?

 CONTINUED - OH.......WHEELS CHARGER WAS NEVER BAD. SHE WAS JUST PLUGGING IT INTO THE SAME NON WORKING OUTLET THE WHOLE TIME.

  - THE COOK TOP - REMARKABLY , THE COOK TOP I PURCHASED ON CRAIGSLIST IS THE EXACT SAME MAKE , MODEL , AND SIZE AS THE ORIGINAL ONE. NOW TO RE-WIRE THIS HIGH OUTPUT APPLIANCE IS A LITTLE NERVE RACKING. IT IS ON A DOUBLE 50 AMP BREAKER. THIS WOULD PUT ME OUT IN LESS THAN 1 SECOND.....SOME SERIOUS VOLTAGE GOING THROUGH THESE ELECTRICAL LINES. THIS WAS A PROCESS :

  1 - REMOVE SHELF AND ALL CLEANING SUPPLIES IN THE HEATER CLOSET DIRECTLY BEHIND THE COOK TOP AND KITCHEN COUNTER.

  2 - REMOVE A PANEL AND HOOK FROM THE WALL HIDING THE ELECTRIC JUNCTION BOX. I REMEMBER THIS BOX WELL AND IT IS FULL. THE CONNECTIONS I USED YEARS AGO WERE CALLED " BUGS ". THESE METAL APPARATUSES CONNECT ALUMINUM AND COPPER WIRES TOGETHER AND PREVENT THEM FROM OXIDIZING.

  3 - I UNDO THE WIRING AND REMOVE THE OLD COOK TOP. THE KIDS HELP ME INSTALL THE " NEW " ONE. I REWIRE EVERYTHING AND SEAL THE JUNCTION BOX. BY THE WAY I AM IN A TIGHT CLOSET SITTING ON A SPACKLE BUCKET WITH A DROP LIGHT AND BOX FAN BLOWING ON ME. THIS IS AGAINST MY NORMAL WAY OF DOING THINGS. I NEVER SEAL ANYTHING UNTIL I TEST IT.  WELP , I HAVE WHEELS WATCH THE COOK TOP AND MY ELDEST WATCH THE JUNCTION BOX. I THROW THE BREAKER AND IT TRIPS BIG TIME........BLOW.  LET ME TELL YOU HAVING A DOUBLE 50 AMP BREAKER TRIP ON YOU IS NO JOKE.

  BREAK TIME :

  WE HAD A SCHEDULE TO KEEP AND I , IN THE WORK MODE , PUSHED EVERY THING BACK.  SO WHEELS , THE KIDS , AND I TAKE A RIDE....AFTER I SHOWER.

  WE HAVE LUNCH AT DAMON'S GRILL AND IT WAS VERY GOOD AGAIN.  THIS IS QUICKLY BECOMING  A " GO TO " PLACE FOR US. AGAIN , I POSTED A PICTURE OF THE FOOD ON FACEBOOK.....WINGS , CAESAR SALAD , CHICKEN QUESADILLAS , AND A SAMPLER PLATTER OF MOZZA STICKS , THIN STRING ONION FRIES , POTATO WEDGES , AND MORE.

  OFF TO WALMART TO PURCHASE SOME THINGS NEEDED AND NOT SO NEEDED.

  NEXT STOP HOME DEPOT.  NOW FOR THE MOST PART EVERYTHING WENT WELL AND QUICKLY. THE ONLY REASON I AM GOING TO THIS POCONO HOME DEPOT IS BECAUSE A SALES LADY GAVE ME A $50 DISCOUNT BECAUSE 2 MONTHS AGO THEY FUCKED UP AN ICE MAKER ORDER BIG TIME.  SO THIS LADY WHO HAS BEEN SUPER NICE THE WHOLE TIME FOR 2 MONTHS SUDDENLY GIVES ME FUCKING ATTITUDE. I WAS IN NO MOOD FOR THIS SHIT. I PURCHASE SOME GEL AND LARGE WIRE NUTS TO INSTALL THE COOK TOP ALONG WITH 2 BBQ GRILL COVERS ( SHOULD OF BEEN ONE BUT WHEELS THINKS HAVING A BACK-UP IS SMART ) , AND A NEW BBQ GRILL.

  CONTINUED - NOW , I CALLED TO CONFIRM AT 10AM THAT WE WOULD GET THE $50 DISCOUNT. SHE SAID , " JUST MAKE SURE YOU GET HERE BEFORE 4:30PM. "  I FIND THE LADY AND SHE SEEMS PISSED AT ME. I WAS THE ONE TOTALLY FUCKING GOING OUT OF MY WAY FOR THIS HOME DEPOT AND WHEN THEY FUCKED UP MY REFRIGERATOR AND ICE MAKER ORDER AND SHE IS GIVING ME ATTITUDE ?  I CONTINUE TO BE NICE AND COMPLACENT. AT FIRST , I CAN NOT FIND THE BBQ GRILL I WANTED. THE LADY RELUCTANTLY HELPS ME ON THEIR WEBSITE. SHE SAID IT WAS NOT IN STOCK SO NOW I GO TO A BIGGER AND MORE EXPENSIVE MODEL. THE WOMAN SAYS SHE WILL MEET US UP FRONT BY THE REGISTER FOR THE DISCOUNT. SHE LOOKS AT OUR CART AND I FEEL THE SHIT COMING.

  CONTINUED - " THE CONVERSATION "

 HOME DEPOT LADY - " YOU SAID YOU WERE BUYING A BBQ AND DRIVEWAY LIGHTS. I DON'T SEE THE DRIVEWAY LIGHTS HERE. I CAN ONLY GIVE YOU A $20 DISCOUNT. "

 ME - " YEAH , YOU DO NOT HAVE THE DRIVEWAY LIGHTS WE PURCHASED AT OUR LOCAL HOME DEPOT " BUT " THE STUFF I PURCHASED HERE IS WAY MORE THAN DRIVEWAY LIGHTS. ( I ALSO GOT A BIGGER AND MORE EXPENSIVE BBQ )

  LADY - " I DO NOT HAVE THE AUTHORITY TO GIVE YOU MORE THAN $20. YOU CAN COME BACK TOMORROW WHEN THE MANAGER IS HERE. "

  ME - ( GETTING PISSED , READY TO GO CODE RED ) - I SAY HER NAME LIKE BIFF SAYS TO MCFLY ......." NOW I TALKED TO YOU THIS MORNING M _ _ _ . I DROVE 45 MINUTES TO GET HERE. YOU TOLD ME A $50 DISCOUNT. WE LEAVE TOMORROW AND CAN NOT COME HERE. "  I DROVE 45 MINUTES TO GET HERE ! "

  LADY - " OH.....JUST FOLLOW ME "

  ME - " GOOD ANSWER "

 LADY - ( DISGUSTED ) " EXCUUUUUSE ME ? "

  ME - ( SECONDS FROM CODE RED ) - " I SAID ........GOOOOOOOODDDD.  ANSSSSSS............SSSSWER. "

 LADY - SHE MURMURS TO THE REGISTER GUY AND I HEAR , " JUST GIVE HIM THE DAMN $50 DISCOUNT "

  I CHECK MY RECEIPT AND I DID GET THE DISCOUNT. I AM HAPPY. WHEELS AND KIDS SAY NOTHING. I NEVER GET A " WAY TO STICK TO YOUR GUNS DAD. "  I HAVE AN ISSUE WITH PEOPLE WHEN THEY SAY SOMETHING AND DO SOMETHING ELSE. THIS LADY WAS DAMN CLOSE TO ME GOING VIRAL ON SOCIAL MEDIA.

  BACK HOME WE ARE GREETED BY THE GREAT " NERVOUS NELLIE "........TAIL WAGGING ,TEETH GRINNING , AND VOICE YODELING HAPPINESS. IT IS A FRIGGIN' SIGHT TO SEE. WE ALL LAUGH.

  WHEELS TAKE A VIDEO OF A DOE AND FAWN.....PRETTY COOL. WE ALSO SEE A LARGE BAD ASS STORK PATROLLING THE EDGE  OF THE LAKE.

  PUNCH LIST PART II  : ( THE KIDS AND WHEELS HELP BIG TIME )

  - WHEELS CHECKS VACUUMS. THEY BOTH WORK AND THE PREVIOUS RENTER ACTUALLY SOLDERED A CONNECTION FOR THE POWER SUPPLY. THIS IS BIG.

  - BOTH KIDS WIPE DOWN ALL WINDOW SILLS ON BOTH FLOORS. THESE ARE BRAND NEW WINDOWS AND I LOVE THEM. I WANT TO KEEP THEM CLEAN TO PREVENT ROTTING AND DECAYING. OH , I HAD THE KIDS WIPE THEM DOWN A 2ND TIME SINCE THEY DID NOT DO IT RIGHT THE FIRST TIME....PARTLY MY FAULT FOR NOT SHOWING THEM.

  - KIDS DUST ALL COBWEBS ON BOTH FLOORS.

  - KIDS , WHEELS , AND MYSELF CHECK AND REPLACE LIGHT BULBS WHERE NEEDED.

  - YOUNGEST HELPS ME FIX A 4' FLO LIGHT IN THE LAUNDRY ROOM. THE KID STANDS ON THE WASHER AND DRYER TO ACCESS THE LIGHT. ME STANDING ON THE APPLIANCES WOULD ONLY CAUSE INJURY TO ME AND THE APPLIANCES.

  - WHEELS AND I COMPLETELY CLEAN 2 FRONT DOOR LANTERN LIGHTS. THEY HAVE NOT BEEN CLEANED THAT THOROUGHLY SINCE WE BUILT THE HOUSE.

  - ELDEST WINDEXES FRONT DOOR GLASS.

  - I SECURE A FRONT DOOR. I NEED TO USE A DRILL AND A SMALL DRILL BIT. I DRILL A PILOT HOLE , INSTALL A SCREW , AND REALIZE I SCREWED THE DOOR CLOSED. RE-DO EVERYTHING.....#I'MANIDIOT.

  - ACCESS THE CRAWL SPACE WHICH IS ALWAYS FUN. I REMOVE A LADDER AND LAWN MOWER. I ALSO SAY HELLO TO A LARGE SPIDER.

  - CUT THE LAWN AND MOVE LARGE BRANCHES AND ROCKS.

  - YOUNGEST MAKES NOTES/INSTRUCTIONS FOR THE DIG DUG ARCADE MACHINE ( TAKES LONG TO WARM UP ) AND ON OUR FRONT DOOR FOR RENTERS TO SET THE ALARM.

  - CHECK LIFE JACKETS FOR MOLD. THEY ARE FINE.

  - ELDEST STRAIGHTENS MUDROOM.

  SOME OTHER THINGS WERE DONE BUT IT IS NOW 7PM.  THE KIDS GO TO RITE AID FOR ALLERGY MEDICINE AND THAN A LOCAL ICE CREAM SHOP. THEY ALSO FILLED THE CAR WITH GAS.

   WE ORDER OUR FAVORITE PIZZA AND THE KIDS BRING IT HOME. ONE PIZZA FOR US AND A 2ND ONE TO GO HOME.....WELL , FOR MY ELDEST AND HER FRIENDS.

   WE SETTLE IN AND HAVE PIZZA AND LEFTOVERS. I COULD ONLY EAT ONE SLICE.

  ALL OF US ON THE COUCH WITH THE PUP. WE WATCH " FRIENDS " AND " SHARK TANK ". BOTH GOOD SHOWS. THE GIRLS OF FRIENDS ARE ALL PIECES OF ASS AND I LIKE WHEN WHEELS UPDATES ME ON WINNERS OF SHARK TANK AND HOW THEY ARE DOING CURRENTLY.

  WE PLAY CARDS AND WATCH THE PHILLIES. IT WAS SO NICE TO SEE THEM BOUNCE BACK FROM A DEVASTATING LOSS THE NIGHT BEFORE.  PLAYING CARDS WAS FUN AND I EVEN CAUGHT A 2ND WIND.

  WENT TO BED AND DID THE SAME THING AS THE NIGHT BEFORE. BOTTOM OF THE 9TH INNING I GO TO BED WITH THE PHILLIES UP 5 - 2. I FELT GOOD ABOUT THIS GAME.

  WEDNESDAY     8 - 8 - 18

  SO TOUGH TO LEAVE THIS PLACE. IT EVEN DOWN POURED FOR ABOUT 45 MINUTES AND IT STILL DIDN'T MATTER. I FRICKIN' LOVE IT HERE.

  SLEPT DECENT. WOKE UP ONCE AROUND 3AM BUT GOT BACK TO SLEEP AND RE-WOKE AT 7:30AM.

  TODAY'S GOAL WAS TO FINISH THE PUNCH LIST AND CHILL. BOTH WERE ACHIEVED.

  PUNCH LIST PART II :

  - TAKE A MORNING WALK AND STOP BY THE OFFICE. THE OLD SECRETARY QUIT AND NOW THERE IS A NEW SHERIFF IN TOWN. SHE SEEMED NICE BUT ALSO SEEMS LIKE A RULE FOLLOWER...........LIKE REALLY BY THE BOOK.  ANYWAY , WE EXCHANGED SOME PLEASANTRIES AND I RECEIVED MORE POOL WRISTLETS.

  - WALKING BACK I SEE A VERY YOUNG FAWN. I TAKE A PICTURE AND POST IT ON SOCIAL MEDIA.

  - LEAF BLOW ALL 3 LEVELS OF OUR HOME. I DID THE UPPER ROOF AND WINDEXED THE SKY LIGHTS WHILE MY YOUNGEST LEAF BLEW THE AWNING ROOF AND ALL DECKS. SO LOVE HAVING THIS KID HERE.

  - ATTIC ----- NO MICE BUT I DEFINITELY HEARD SOMETHING A LITTLE BIT BIGGER. MY SMALL TRAPS ARE BEING CARRIED AWAY SO THIS COULD BE A SQUIRREL OR POSSIBLY A RACCOON. I THINK I HAVE TO TAKE A MORE DRASTIC MATTER HERE. AFTER TAKING THE ENTIRE CLOSET APART I ACCESSED THE CEILING PANEL TO THE ATTIC.  I SET TRAPS AGAIN.  YES MY FAT BODY FIT THROUGH THE SMALL SPACE. MY YOUNGEST HANDED ME THINGS UP VIA THE LADDER I WAS STANDING ON.

 - COMPLETELY DISASSEMBLED A 4 DRAWER CHEST. TO FIX 2 DRAWERS I HAD TO SECURE THE GUIDE RAIL IT SLIDES ON. I WENT UP AND DOWN STAIRS 4 TIMES TO GET THE RIGHT TOOLS AND SUPPLIES. I WAS NOT A HAPPY CAMPER BUT THE DRAWERS NOW WORK NICELY.

 - FIXED A MINI BLIND THAT HAD A PLASTIC STRING CLIP STUCK BEHIND IT. HOW THE HELL DOES THIS HAPPEN ?

 - PUT LADDER AND LAWN MOWER AWAY UNDERNEATH THE HOUSE IN THE CRAWL SPACE. I SECURED THE DOOR AND SOMETHING JUMPED BY THE PANEL. IT MADE ME JUMP AND MY YOUNGEST ON THE 2ND FLOOR BALCONY DECK SAID , " WHAT WAS THAT ? ! " I FIGURED IT WAS A CHIPMUNK OR THAT BIG SPIDER I SAW YESTERDAY.

  - STRAIGHTENED MUDROOM A LITTLE BIT AND PULLED SOME CARPET TILES UP THAT WERE WET FROM A FRIDGE LEAK. I REMOVED THE ICE MAKER AND SHUT THE FRIDGE DOWN. I AM HOPING A DRAIN LINE WAS FROZEN. I WILL LEAVE IT OFF FOR 24 HOURS TO HOPEFULLY DEFROST THE FROZEN LINE. I SET UP A BOX FAN AND CLEANED THE AREA AND INSIDE THE FRIDGE.

  - HARD DRENCHING RAIN FOR ABOUT 45 MINUTES CREATED A HUGE 5 INCH PUDDLE BY OUR BACK STEP AREA. THE SUN CAME OUT AND I DECIDED TO DIG A TRENCH TO LEAD THE WATER AWAY. USING 2 HAMMERS I DID JUST THIS......AND IT WORKED PERFECTLY.

  TAKE A BREAK AND WE HEAD TO THE POOL. I HAVE CORRECTLY GUESSED 2 TIMES ON HOW MANY PEOPLE WILL BE THERE. MY YOUNGEST ASKS , " SO , HOW MANY PEOPLE WILL BE AT THE POOL WHEN WE GET THERE ? " I REPLY , " 4 ".  WE SEE A BUNCH OF CARS IN THE LOT AND MY KID SAYS , " LOOKS LIKE THERE IS MORE THAN 4. "  WE WALK INTO THE GATED POOL AREA AND THERE IS 4 PEOPLE. " MY KIDS SAYS , " OH MAN. YOU'RE RIGHT AGAIN. WAIT , DO WE COUNT ? THAT WOULD BE 6. "  I GIGGLED.  OH.......2 HOT GIRLS SUNNING IN BIKINIS WAS NICE TO SEE.

   BACK HOME WE MAKE LEFTOVERS FOR A LATE LUNCH. PIZZA , QUESADILLAS , AND BBQ WINGS.

  CONTINUED PUNCH LIST PART II :

  - I RE- ALIGN THE CANOES WHICH WERE LAYING SIDEWAYS AGAINST A TREE. I MADE A MAKE SHIFT BENCH FOR ONE END AND USED DECKING BOARDS FOR THE OTHER END. THE 2 CANOES NOW SIT UPSIDE DOWN WITH BOTH ENDS OF THE CANOES ON WOOD AND ELEVATED. I ALSO LABELED THE BOTTOMS OF THE CANOES " PLEASE DO NOT DRAG TO THE LAKE ". ( IT TEARS THE HECK OUT OF THE BOTTOMS )

  - DISASSEMBLED OUR ICE MAKER IN THE NEW FRIDGE. IT MAKES A CLICKING SOUND AND THAN DROPS ICE. I REMOVED THE ICE MAKER , LOWERED THE SETTING TO A SMALLER CUBE SIZE , AND PUT EVERYTHING BACK TOGETHER.  I HAVE NOT HEARD THE CLICKING SOUND ANYMORE BUT TO ME THE ICE IS PRODUCING SLOWER THAN NORMAL.

  - REMOVED ANY STICKS OR LEAVES BLOCKING THE BOTTOM OF THE SPINDLES ON THE MAIN DECK.

  - THE LAST MAJOR PROJECT I WAS RELUCTANT TO START. BUT SINCE WHEELS AND THE KIDS HELPED ME YESTERDAY AND MY YOUNGEST HELPING ME TODAY I HAD THE TIME. I ALLOW MYSELF 3 HOURS TO PUT ONE OF THESE THINGS TOGETHER.............A BBQ GRILL.

  - MY EXPERIENCE HAS TOLD ME IT IS ALWAYS BETTER TO HAVE 2 PEOPLE READ THE DIRECTIONS THAN ONE.  MY YOUNGEST HELPS ME EVERY STEP OF THE WAY AND RIGHT OFF THE BAT FINDS 2 MISTAKES I DID. SHE SAVED ME AT LEAST AN HOUR TIME. THE 22 STEP PROCESS OF ASSEMBLING THIS BBQ GRILL TOOK US 1 HOUR AND 10 MINUTES. OF COURSE THERE IS ALWAYS ONE PROBLEM. THE MANUFACTURER SHORTED US ONE KEY SCREW. IT WAS TO HOLD DOWN THE SIDE BURNER. I DID A LITTLE MACGUYVERING BY SWITCHING A SCREW AND FINDING A MATCHING SCREW FROM MY HARDWARE STORE OF TOOLS. IT WORKED PERFECTLY.

  - BOTH OF US LOOKED FOR THAT DAMN ONE TINY SCREW FOR 15 MINUTES. WE MOVED COUCHES , PILLOWS , AND TABLES AND COULD NOT FIND IT. MY YOUNGEST PUT EVERYTHING BACK TOGETHER AND VACUUMED THE AREA.

 - I EXCHANGED THE PROPANE TANK FROM THE OLD BBQ GRILL AND TESTED THE FLAME. IT WORKED PERFECT.

  MY WORK IS DONE AND IT IS AROUND 7PM. THE PHILLIES GET SMOKED AND I THINK THAT HARD LOSS AFFECTED THEM IN THIS GAME.

  CLEANER STOPS BY AND I GIVE HER A CHECK. WE TALK FOR ABOUT 15 MINUTES......NICE WOMAN.

  CONGRATS TO MY BROTHER AND SISTER-IN-LAW WHO BROUGHT A BABY GIRL INTO THIS WORLD.....SO COOL.

   I ABSOLUTELY ENJOY THE TIME WITH MY YOUNGEST. I KNOW I HAVE SAID THIS A 1000 TIMES BUT THE KID IS JUST SO DAMN COOL.  I HAD A LATE DINNER AT 8PM AND MY KID HAD AN EVEN LATER DINNER AT 9:30PM.

  MY YOUNGEST PLAYED ON THE COMPUTER AND I USED NETFLIX TO WATCH A STAR WARS MOVIE CALLED " ROGUE ONE ". IT WAS VERY GOOD. USING THE Wii TO ACCESS NETFLIX AND OTHER ONLINE STUFF IS AWESOME.

  LATE NIGHT BOTH OF US WATCH 2 EPISODES OF THE NEW SEASON OF " G.L.O.W ".  BOTH WERE VERY GOOD.  

  THE NEXT MORNING........THURSDAY. WHEELS CALLS ME EARLY AND THIS NEVER HAPPENS. SHE TELLS ME SHE HAD BEEN CHASING THE RABBIT IN THE HUTCH FOR 20 MINUTES AND CAN'T GET IT. WE MOVE THIS RABBIT TO THE FENCED IN GARDEN EVERY MORNING. VISUALIZING WHEELS TRYING TO GRAB A RABBIT IN 2 SECTIONS OF THE HUTCH WAS PRETTY FUNNY. I WISHED IT WAS VIDEOED.  I ASSUME WHEELS DID NOT THINK IT WAS TOO FUNNY.

    THURSDAY      8 - 9 - 18

  3 MINUTES. 3 MINUTES.  3........MINUTES. IN SEX , THAT WOULD BE A LONG TIME AND WHEELS WOULD SAY , " ARE YOU DONE YET ? "  BUT IN THE MUSIC/BAR SCENE.....IT  COST ME A FULL NIGHT OF BANDS.

  I PRIDE MYSELF OF INSTANT COMMUNICATION WITH TEXTING. NO ONE TEXT RESPONDS AS FAST AS I DO. NOT SURE IF THIS IS GOOD OR BAD OR I'M JUST NEUROTIC. EMAILS......I CHECK THEM 20 TIMES A DAY.  WELP , WITH MY O.C.D. AND NEUROTICNESS  I JUST MISSED AN EMAIL.

 THE QUICK STORY - DUE TO A CANCELLATION WE HAVE NO BANDS THIS FRIDAY NIGHT ( TODAY ). ON WEDNESDAY I WAS CUTTING THE LAWN. WHEN FINISHED I CHECKED MY EMAILS. THERE WAS AN EMAIL ALL VENUE OWNERS LIKE TO SEE....." WE LIKE TO MOVE OUR ENTIRE SHOW TO YOUR CLUB. " THE EMAIL WAS SENT AT 1:15PM. I SAW IT AT 2:05PM. INSTEAD OF REPLYING I CALLED TO SAVE TIME. THE BAND MEMBER ANSWERS AND SAYS , " I JUST BOOKED OUR SHOW AT ANOTHER CLUB JUST 3 MINUTES AGO. " YEP......3 FRIGGIN' MINUTES. I WAS JUST ABOUT TO TEXT OUR DOORMAN AND BARTENDER ABOUT THE ADDED BANDS BUT WAITED 3 MINUTES. THE STORY OF MY LIFE.....MISSED A GOOD OPPORTUNITY.

  SLEPT GOOD AND ONLY WOKE UP ONCE BUT FELL BACK ASLEEP. BY 8AM I WAS IN FULL BLOG MODE , WORK MODE , CLEAN MODE , AND LOAD MODE. 

  BEAUTIFUL MORNING AND I WAS IN CLEAN MODE FOR THE MOST PART. IT IS SO FRIGGIN' NICE HERE AND I DID NOT WANT TO LEAVE. I FINISH UP SOME PUNCH LIST STUFF AND BEGIN MY CLEAN UP. WITHIN ONE HOUR I WAS LOADING THINGS WITH MY YOUNGEST.  HOW WE LOADED AN OLD BBQ GRILL , A LADDER , A  BIG BOX , 4 FOOT BULBS , A 1000 TOOLS , AND OTHER THINGS IS AMAZING BUT.....I DO PRIDE MYSELF ON PUZZLING THINGS INTO A VEHICLE.

  STOP AT MCDONALDS AND MY YOUNGEST ORDERS A BIG MAC. THIS ENTERTAINED ME.

  A WONDERFUL RIDE HOME. WE TALKED AND MADE GREAT TIME.

  AT HOME WE UNLOAD AND SETTLED IN. WE TALK WITH WHEELS AND CHILL.

  OFF TO THE NAIL AND I UNLOAD TRASH , BBQ , 4 FOOT BULBS , AND LARGE CARD BOARD BOXES. I THAN SET OUT NEW CALENDARS AND ASSEMBLE A NEW DEEP FRYER. I SET UP THE P.A. SYSTEM FOR " JUST JAM " AS MUSICIANS START COMING IN. IT WAS NICE TO SEE AND HEAR.

  BARTEND , CLEAN , AND EMAIL BANDS ALL NIGHT. IT WAS FUN BUT BY 1AM I WAS EXHAUSTED. THE DOORMAN/BARTENDER SAID HE CLOSE FOR ME.

  AT HOME I HAVE A BEER AND SOME ALMOND NUTS. I LAST ABOUT 10 MINUTES AND IT WAS OFF TO BED.

  FRIDAY       8 - 10 - 18

  KINDA A CHILL DAY. 

  MY CELL PHONE WAS NOT RECEIVING CALLS SO I HAD TO CALL " SPRINT ".  A NICE PAKISTAN GENTLEMAN FIXED THE PROBLEM QUITE QUICKLY. I HAD TO ASK HIM 3 TIMES EACH INSTRUCTION HE SAID BUT WE GOT IT DONE.

  LOOKS LIKE I WILL BE WORKING FOR 2 TO 3 DAYS IN NEW JERSEY WITH A FAMILY MEMBER.

  TEXTS FROM YOUNGEST AND ME :

 ME - " YOU NEED A RIDE HOME ? "

 YOUNGEST - " YES PLEASE. CAN YOU GET ME NOW ? "

 ME - " MOTORCYCLE ? "

 YOUNGEST - " I WOULD PREFER THE CAR. "

 ME - " SO MOTORCYCLE IT IS. "

 YOUNGEST - " NUDGEEEE ".

  TOOK A NICE MOTORCYCLE RIDE TO PICK UP MY YOUNGEST AT A SLEEPOVER. WE TOOK THE BACK WAYS HOME AND IT WAS VERY ENJOYABLE.....A SLOW CRUISE.

   BACK HOME WE CHILL AND HANG OUT. I WATCH SOME TV AND TAKE A NAP.

   I LIKE MY YOUNGEST TO TAKE A RIDE WITH ME TO THE NAIL TO PREP FOR THE NIGHT. 

HERE IS THE SHORT STORY:

  ME - ( TALKING TO MY YOUNGEST WHILE I'M LAYING ON HER BED ) - " SO......."

 YOUNGEST - " UT OH. "

  ME - " YOU KNOW I LOVE JUST LOOKING AT YOU. YOU BRING SUCH JOY TO ME WHEN I JUST SEE YOUR FACE. "

 YOUNGEST - ( ROLLS EYES )

  ME - " WHAT DO YOU THINK WE TAKE A RIDE TO THE NAIL AND YOU HELP ME ? "

 YOUNGEST - " I WANT TO DO ART HOME WORK AND TAKE A SHOWER. "

  ME - " C'MON , I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU ALL LAST NIGHT AND TODAY BECAUSE OF YOUR SLEEPOVER. "

  YOUNGEST - " WE WERE JUST AT THE MOUNTAIN HOUSE FOR A WEEK TOGETHER. "

  ME - " I KNOW. BUT THAT IS THE PAST. C'MON , LET'S TAKE A RIDE. YOU CAN TEST THE NEW DEEP FRYER AND MAKE SOME MOZZARELLA STICKS. "

  YOUNGEST - " OH MY GOD. YOU'RE SUCH A NUDGE. I WANT TO SHOWER AND DO ART WORK. "

  ME - " YOU KNOW......DO YOU REMEMBER WHEN I HELD YOU IN JUST ONE HAND ? YOU USED TO SLEEP ON MY CHEST AND I WOULD WARM YOU. I LOVED THOSE TIMES WHEN WE USED TO HANG OUT ALL THE TIME. I BATH YOU IN THE KITCHEN SINK AND SNUGGLE WITH YOU. I SING " ITSY BITSY SPIDER " TO YOU AND I READ " THE CAT IN THE HAT " AND " ARE YOU MY MOTHER ? ". DO YOU REMEMBER ALL THESE GOOD TIMES ? "

 YOUNGEST - ( SHAKES HER HEAD )

  ME - ( I CONTINUE TO SAY MORE MEMORIES AND SHE INTERRUPTS ME )

  YOUNGEST - " MAN........YOU ARE SO DRAMATIC "

  ME - ( I LAUGH OUT LOUD )

  I TAKE A MOTORCYCLE RIDE BY MYSELF TO THE NAIL AND PREP FOR THE NIGHT.

  BACK HOME WE HAVE A FAMILY MEMBER OVER FOR PIZZA AND SANDWICHES.  WE TALK , EAT , AND HAVE SOME COCKTAILS UNTIL 10PM AT NIGHT.  IT WAS A GOOD TIME.

  PHILLIES LOSE TO LAST PLACE PADRES 2 - 0. THEY HAVE NOT SCORED A RUN IN THE LAST 19 INNINGS.

  WATCH 2 EPISODES OF " GLOW ". I HALF FALL ASLEEP ON THE 1ST ONE AND TOTALLY FALL ASLEEP ON THE 2ND ONE.

  OFF TO BED.  I FORGET ANOTHER GOOD DREAM.

  SATURDAY       8 - 11 - 18

  START MORNING OUT BY " DOING THE BOOKS ". THIS IS NEVER A FUN THING TO DO BUT AT THE END WHEELS HANDS ME THE FINAL MONTHLY NUMBERS. I AM SO PROUD OF THE GREAT NUMBERS UNTIL I SAY TO WHEELS , " I THOUGHT WE HAD TO PAY THE LIQUOR LICENSE FEE THIS MONTH ? " WHEELS SAYS , " OH , I FORGOT THAT. "  FROM VERY GOOD NUMBERS TO SO-SO NUMBERS........MOOD SLIGHTLY RUINED.

  THE BILLS STOCK PILING THIS MONTH.  SO DON'T WANT TO SEE NEXT MONTHS FINAL NUMBERS.

  AND THE RAINS COME.  GOOD GOD IT IS HITTING BOTH COASTS. WORSE PICTURE I SAW ON ACTION NEWS WAS BRAND NEW CARS FLOATING DOWN A NEW JERSEY STREET AND PILING UP AT A LOW BRIDGE. A CAR DEALERSHIP WAS UP THE STREET AND MOST OF THEIR CARS FLOATED DOWN AND PILED UP AT LOW BRIDGE.

   2 BANDS FOR SUNDAY NIGHT..... ALITTLE COUNTRY.

   OFF TO THE NAIL TO PREP FOR THE NIGHT. WHEELS AND OUR YOUNGEST HELPED. THAN OFF TO A FAMILY GET TOGETHER WHICH WAS A BLAST. ALOT OF LAUGHS AND IT WAS FUN.

  YOUNGEST AND I HEAD BACK TO THE NAIL FOR A 6 BAND NIGHT. I HELPED LOAD BANDS IN AND RUN THE NIGHT BUT WE LEFT AFTER 3 HOURS.  ALL THE BANDS AND BAND MEMBERS WERE VERY COOL.

  BACK HOME I CHILL WITH WHEELS AND MY YOUNGEST. WE WATCH THE PHILLIES WIN A MUCH NEEDED GAME. WE ALSO WATCHED 3 EPISODES OF " GLOW " WHICH WERE VERY GOOD.

  OFF TO BED WHERE I SLEPT GOOD.  FOR THE 3RD DAY IN A ROW I FORGOT MY DREAM. AMAZING......I REMEMBER IT WHEN I GET UP AT 6:45AM AND NOW IT IS 8:30AM AND I COMPLETELY FORGET THE STORY. WHAT THE HELL ?

  SUNDAY       8 - 12 - 18

  GOOD CHOICE......DON'T TAKE MOTORCYCLE.

  TRYING TO TAKE IT TOTALLY EASY TODAY SINCE I AM WORKING SIDE JOB THIS WEEK. I WILL EXPLAIN TOMORROW.

   WHEELS AND I TAKE A WALK AND SAVE A DOG.  WE SEE THIS DOG RUN ACROSS THE STREET.  WE TRY CALLING IT AND THE POOCH ACTUALLY RUNS TO US. A CUTE YOUNG DOG. I WALK TO A HOUSE WHERE THE DOG IS LAYING ON THE GRASS WHILE WHEELS ASKS A LADY ACROSS THE STREET. A YOUNG WOMAN ANSWERS THE DOOR AND I SAY , " IS THIS YOUR DOG ? "   SHE REPLIES , " OH MY GOD THAT CRAZY DOG. HOW THE HECK DID HE GET OUT ? I JUST WALKED HIM INTO OUR HOUSE BY THE BACK DOOR."  SHE THANKS US AND WHEELS AND I CONTINUE OUR WALK.

  THIS MORNING I WATCHED A MOVIE CALLED " JACK REACHER " WITH TOM CRUISE. IT WAS VERY GOOD.

  WHEELS AND I TAKE A TRIP TO A FAMILY MEMBER'S HOUSE.  HE IS MOVING SOON AND IS GIVING AWAY CERTAIN THINGS LIKE A $3,000 ELLIPTICAL EXERCISE MACHINE. WE LOADED IT INTO THE VAN AND MOVE IT HOME.  HIS PROPERTY AND HOUSE IS PRETTY COOL.

  BACK HOME WE UNLOAD THE LARGE MACHINE WHICH WE HAD BUNGEE CORDED DOWN ALONG WITH SOME WIRING. THE UNIT IS SO BIG WE HAD TO DRIVE WITH THE HATCH OPEN. BUT , WE GOT IT OUT , BROUGHT IT IN , CLEANED IT UP , AND MOVED IT UPSTAIRS.........I DID HAVE TO REMOVE A DOOR.  I AM NOT SURE HOW MUCH WE WILL USE IT BUT I WILL TRY TO SET-UP A TV AND RADIO IN THE ROOM TO GIVE US MORE INCENTIVE.

  CONTEMPLATING TAKING THE MOTORCYCLE OR VAN TO THE NAIL. AT THE LAST MINUTE I DECIDE MY VAN BECAUSE MY YOUNGEST TELLS ME , " THEY ARE CALLING FOR 40% RAIN. " THE KID ALSO SAYS , " THAT IS NOT TOO BAD. " I REPLY , " FOR ME , THAT IS 100% DEFINITELY RAINING. "

  WHEELS GETS INVITED TO A 10 PERSON DINNER , PEOPLE'S LIGHT THEATRE , AND A V.I.P. PRIVATE PARTY WITH FOOD & BOOZE AND THE CAST OF THE THEATRE SHOW.  SHE SAID THE SHOW WAS SAD BUT GOOD. IT WAS THE LIFE OF WOODY GUTHRIE. OH , AT THE END OF THE PLAY THE CAST BOWED AND THAN THANKED THE FAMILY MEMBERS WHEELS WAS SITTING WITH. I HAVE WITNESSED THIS BEFORE.  MAN............I CAN NOT THINK HOW LIFE WOULD BE IF MONEY WAS TAKEN OUT OF THE EQUATION.  JESUS CHRIST THAT BE NICE. OH , THIS WAS ALL FREE TO WHEELS.

  AT THE NAIL I PREP FOR THE NIGHT.  A REALLY NICE COUNTRY SINGER STOPPED BY TO PERFORM. HIS NAME WAS JONATHAN FOSTER. HE ALSO HAD THE PERFECT VAN FOR TRAVELING......BED , SHELVING , 5 GALLON DRUM OF WATER , COMFORT , SPACE .......ETC.

  BACK HOME MY YOUNGEST BEGINS A LARGE SUMMER ART PROJECT SO I AGAIN TRY TO TAKE IT EASY. I WATCH " JACK REACHER : SUCK ME BACK IN " .....SOMETHING LIKE THAT. AGAIN , IT WAS VERY GOOD. REACHER , PLAYED BY TOM CRUISE IS A CROSS BETWEEN " THE PUNISHER " AND " JAMES BOND " .

   YOUNGEST FINISHES ART AND WANTS TO WATCH " GLOW ". WE WATCH THE FINAL 2 EPISODES OF SEASON 2 AND THEY WERE VERY GOOD TO EXCELLENT.

   WHEELS ARRIVES HOME AND SHE TELLS US ABOUT THE THEATRE PLAY. MAN DID WOODY GUTHRIE HAVE A EXTREMELY TOUGH LIFE. SHE ALSO SAID THE SHOW WE SAW " RING OF FIRE " ( JOHNNY CASH TRIBUTE ) ALSO HAD THE SAME CAST MEMBER IN IT. I ACTUALLY REMEMBER HIM. THIS GROUP OF ACTORS/MUSICIANS WILL BE TRAVELING TO POLAND AND MORE TO PERFORM......PRETTY COOL.  OH , A FAMILY MEMBER RECEIVED A REAL PICTURE OF WOODY GUTHRIE AUTOGRAPHED BY THE WHOLE CAST. AGAIN , HAVING MONEY WOULD BE SO DAMN COOL. THE ONLY PICTURE I WAS GIVEN WAS A MUG SHOT BY THE PHILADELPHIA POLICE AND AUTOGRAPHED BY MY FATHER SO I COULD BE RELEASED IN HIS CUSTODY.

  COULD NOT BELIEVE IT WAS MIDNIGHT SO I HAD TO GO TO BED BECAUSE I HAVE A LONG 3 DAYS COMING UP. I WATCHED TV FOR ABOUT 5 MINUTES AND FELL ASLEEP PRETTY QUICKLY. I DID WAKE UP AT 3AM AND 4AM.

  A GAME I USED TO LIKE TO PLAY WAS " TAPS ". IT IS A BASKETBALL GAME AND I PLAYED IT ALOT. MY FRIENDS  MURPH , CAPONE , AND KEVIN L. PLAYED WITH ME. WE DECIDED TO DO SOMETHING REALLY STUPID. I CLIMBED MY DAD'S CHIMNEY ALONG THE DRIVEWAY.  THE NEW " TAPS " GAME WAS TO THROW THE BALL WHILE SITTING ON THE TOP OF THE CHIMNEY. WE PLAYED FOR ABOUT 45 MINUTES AND THAN WE DECIDED TO THROW METAL BOTTLES INTO THE BASKETBALL NET BELOW.  ANOTHER 45 MINUTES LATER I FEEL THE CHIMNEY MOVE. I TRY TO PUNCH IN AN ATTIC WINDOW TO HOLD ON TO SOMETHING. IT WOULD NOT WORK SO I SLID DOWN QUICKLY AND SAID , " UM GUYS , THIS GAME IS SO OVER. ".........................dream ends.

  MONDAY          8 - 13 - 18

  YOU WANT A LONG DAY AND NIGHT..........EITHER DID I.  BUT SOMETIMES YOU NEED TO STEP UP.

  NOTHING ELSE ON MY MIND EXCEPT TRAVELING TO NEW JERSEY FOR A SIDE JOB. WELL , TECHNICALLY IT IS HELPING MY OLDER BROTHER. HE HAS HELPED ME A ,000 TIMES SO IT WAS MY TURN TO RECIPROCATE.  WHAT HAPPENED ? - ONE OF HIS WORKERS GOT THERE WIRES CROSSED WITH THE COMPANY AND HAD A VACATION BOOKED. SO , NOW THEY ARE SHORT A PERSON. I WAS CALLED AND INSTANTLY SAID YES..........FOR FREE.

  I LEAVE AT 7:45AM. NOT THE BEST TIME TO TRAVEL I KNOW BUT I DID NOT FEEL LIKE WAITING. I MADE DECENT TIME CONSIDERING AND HIT TRAFFIC AND MONSOON RAINS.  GOOD GOD THE RAIN.

 AT THE JOB I MOSTLY DID ELECTRICAL WORK. IT DID CHANGE TO DRYWALL AND THAN FLOOR TILING.  MY LEGS WERE HURTING BY MID AFTERNOON. BY 3:30PM I WAS HEADING HOME......IN TRAFFIC.  I MAY RE-THINK WHAT I WANT TO DO THE NEXT 2 DAYS IF WORKING IN NEW JERSEY AGAIN.

  OH , THE CUSTOMER WAS IN A BAND. I GOT HIS CARD.

  BACK HOME I TAKE A NAP FOR 30 MINUTES. I WAKE UP , EAT 2 SLOPPY JOES , AND HEAD TO THE NAIL.

  AT THE NAIL I BEGIN MY PROCESS OF FIXING , STOCKING , CLEANING , AND DOING SOME UNWANTED CHORES I WON'T GET INTO.  BY 9PM I AM FEELING THE AFFECTS OF WORKING CONSTRUCTION IN THE DAY TIME.

  THANK GOODNESS OUR ELDEST MADE IT HOME FROM TRAVELING TO VIRGINIA FOR A WEEK. SHE VISITED FRIENDS , WENT TO THE LIBRARY EVERY DAY , AND ATTENDED SUNDAY CHURCH. THE KID TOOK THE 5 HOUR ROAD TRIP , STOPPED AT HER HOUSE , THAN OUR HOME , THAN THE NAIL TO SWITCH CARS , AND THAN BACK TO HER HOUSE. YEP....TO BE YOUNG AGAIN.

  BY 10PM I AM FINISHED AND PATRONS LEAVE.  THE RAIN HAS HIT US AGAIN. WITH NO ONE HERE I INSTANTLY CLOSE. THERE IS ABSOLUTELY NO REASON TO STAY OPEN ESPECIALLY IF I GOT ALL MY BAND AND WORK THINGS DONE.

  PICK UP MY YOUNGEST AT A FRIENDS HOUSE LATE NIGHT. ALWAYS A JOY TO CHILL WITH THIS KID.

  BACK HOME WE PLAY WITH THE PUP.

  I CHILL , HAVE 2 GLASSES OF WINE , AND GO TO BED. I WOKE UP WITH A HANGOVER. WHAT THE HELL ?

  TUESDAY         8 - 14 - 18

  DAY 2 - WORK....IN THE RAIN , THAN SUN , RAIN , THAN SUN , RAIN , THAN SUN.

  UP EARLY WITH MY YOUNGEST. THE KID GOES TO SCHOOL FOR FRESHMAN ORIENTATION AND I HEAD TO NEW JERSEY FOR A 2ND DAY.

  ARRIVE AT THE JOB AND WE BEGIN TO RUN MORE ELECTRICAL LINES.  WE SWITCH A BIG WINDOW AND A SMALL WINDOW. YES , WE FLIPPED FLOPPED WINDOWS BECAUSE OF THE NEW KITCHEN DESIGN. BASICALLY THIS CUSTOMER BLEW OUT A DINING ROOM TO DOUBLE THE SIZE OF THEIR KITCHEN AREA. MY BROTHER IS A TRUE MASTER CARPENTER AND THE SCHEMATICS IS TAPED TO THE WALL FOR US AND THE CUSTOMER TO SEE.

  WE DRYWALL ALL WALLS AND CEILINGS AND APPLY A FIRST COAT OF SPACKLE. THE CUSTOMER CAN NOT BELIEVE HOW FAST PRODUCTION IS MOVING. I SEEN THIS A 100 TIMES BEFORE......MY BROTHER HAS THE RIGHT TOOLS ALL THE TIME AND MOVES SO QUICKLY WHILE DOING A PHENOMENAL JOB.

  WE HAVE LUNCH AROUND NOON AND TALK SHOP. AFTER LUNCH WE BEGIN TILING THE MASSIVE FLOOR. WE STARTED ABOUT 20% YESTERDAY AND TODAY ABOUT 98% IS COMPLETE. I WAS CUTTING ON THE LARGE WET SAW MACHINE WHILE MY BROTHER MEASURED AND LAID THE TILES. THE THING THAT SUCKED WAS THE SUN AND RAIN WERE FIGHTING EACH OTHER ALL AFTERNOON. AT ONE MOMENT I WAS HOT IN THE SUN CUTTING TILE OUTSIDE AND THAN THE NEXT MOMENT IT WAS RAINING AND I WAS GETTING WET. 

  WE WRAP UP AND I LEAVE MY CAR AT THE CUSTOMERS HOUSE.  SINCE THIS IS A 1+ HOUR TRIP I DECIDED TO BUNK AT MY BROTHER & SISTER-IN-LAW'S HOUSE FOR THE NIGHT.  I HOP IN MY BROTHER'S TRUCK AND WE ROLL TO HIS HOUSE........HOUSE....YEAH THAT IS THE USUAL DESCRIPTION.

  WE ARRIVE AT HIS HOME AND IT HAS BEEN ABOUT 3 YEARS SINCE I HAVE BEEN HERE. THIS IS A HOME OF A MASTER CARPENTER AND THE WIFE IS A MASTER DECORATOR. LET ME TELL YOU THIS HOME IS SO FRICKIN' MAGNIFICENT " BETTER HOMES & GARDENS " WOULD SAY " THIS IS WAY TOO NICE FOR US TO DO A STORY ABOUT. EVERYTHING IS TOP SHELF DECOR AND I REALLY ENJOY THE ARCHITECTURE FROM MASSIVE TILE FLOORS TO VAULTED CEILINGS WITH MOSAIC ARTWORK ON THE CEILINGS TO THE BEDROOMS THAT IS DRESSED OUT TO THE HILT. IT REALLY IS SOMETHING TO SEE. OH , AND THE HOME SMELLS GOOD IN EVERY ROOM.

  I SHOWER AND SHAVE AND DO SOME COMPUTER STUFF.

  BY 6:30PM WE HEAD OUT TO " YARDS BREWERY AND RESTAURANT ". I AM SURPRISED TO SEE THE BAR/RESTAURANT IS PACKED ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. OUR BARTENDER IS EXCELLENT AND I ASKED HIM TO SURPRISE ME WITH WITH 4 SAMPLE BEERS.....THEY HAVE A 100 BEERS FOR SELECTING HERE. THIS NEW THING " ASK THE BARTENDER OR WAITRESS " YOUR ORDER IS KINDA COOL. HE BRINGS ME SOME WHITE BELGIUM , FLYING FISH , AND 2 OTHER LAGER STYLE BEERS. I ALSO HAVE A SAM ADAMS SEASONAL. HE GAVE US SAMPLES OF BEER OF FREE TO TRY WHICH WAS NICE. I TRY THE " VAMPIRE CHICKEN QUESADILLAS " AND THEY WERE VERY GOOD. NOT SURE WHY THEY WERE CALLED VAMPIRE THOUGH. I FINISHED WITH A CHICKEN AND AVOCADO SANDWICH WHICH WAS ALSO VERY GOOD.

  WHILE HAVING DINNER THE GIANT TV RIGHT IN FRONT OF US IS TURNED TO THE PHILLIES / RED SOX GAME. PHILLIES LOSE 2 -1.

  BACK HOME WE WATCH COMEDY CENTRAL'S ROAST OF JAMES FRANCO. WE KNEW IT WAS AN OLD ONE BUT IT WAS GOOD.

  BY 10PM I HEAD TO BED. I TRY TO WATCH " THE WALKING DEAD " SEASON 8 OPENER ( WHICH MY BROTHER GETS FOR FREE ) BUT FALL ASLEEP TOO QUICKLY.

  SLEEP UNTIL 4AM , GET UP TO PEE , AND THAN SLEEP AGAIN UNTIL 7AM....I'LL TAKE IT. 

  WEDNESDAY       8 - 15 - 18

  WHEN YOU GIVE A BROTHER YOUR NIKE SHORTS............THAT'S LOVE.

   SLEPT PRETTY GOOD. WAS UP A COUPLE OF TIMES AND OUT OF BED AT 4AM BUT THAN FELL BACK ASLEEP UNTIL 6:45AM. IF YOU ADD THE HOURS UP IT IS GOOD.

   7AM .......I AM DOWNSTAIRS AND DOING MY NORMAL COMPUTER STUFF. BY 7:25AM WE ARE OUT THE DOOR. WE STOP AT WAWA FOR GAS ( TOTALLY FORGOT NEW JERSEY PUMPS FOR YOU ) AND BREAKFAST SANDWICHES. I BUY THE BREAKFAST SINCE MY BROTHER BOUGHT DINNER THE NIGHT BEFORE........GOOD TRADE.

  AT THE JOB AND I USE 80% OF MY ENERGY BY GROUTING THE LARGE FLOOR AREA. WE LET THE GROUT DRY TOO LONG AND MAN IT WAS NOT FUN SPONGING IT.

  THE DAY CONTINUES WITH UNCRATING A TON OF KITCHEN CABINETS AND TRIM WORK , SETTING WALL AND BASE KITCHEN CABINETS , SPACKLING , TYVEKING AN OUTSIDE WINDOW , BREAKING DOWN A SHIT LOAD OF CARDBOARD BOXES , AND MORE.

  BY 2:15PM WE ARE ALL CAUGHT UP ON THE HEAVY STUFF. MY BROTHER CAN HANDLE IT FROM HERE AND HIS CREW RETURNS ON MONDAY.  WE HUG AND I ROLL OUT. 

  OH , I LENT HIM A PAIR OF REEBOK SPORT SHORTS BECAUSE HE TOTALLY RIPPED THE BEJESUS OUT OF HIS.  BROTHERS.....SHARE CLOTHES. I ASKED HIM IF HE WANTED MY G-STRING UNDERWEAR TOO BUT HE PASSED.

  ON THE ROAD AT 2:15PM AND I SHOULD MAKE GOOD TIME BEATING THE TRAFFIC AND GETTING HOME.........40 MINUTES TOPS. WELL , I MADE GREAT TIME UNTIL I GOT JUST 5 MILES FROM MY EXIT ON THE BLUE ROUTE.    FIVE..............FRIGGIN'...........MILES.  TRAFFIC CAME TO AN ABSOLUTELY STOP. APPARENTLY THERE WAS A CAR FIRE AND IT SLOWED THE PACE DOWN TO A SNAIL. START AND STOP AT 2 MPH FOR 5 MILES. THE LAST MILE PEOPLE DROVE UP THE SIDE EMBANKMENT. I ALMOST DID MYSELF BUT DIDN'T.

  I ARRIVE HOME AT 4PM.......BLOW.

  HUG MY YOUNGEST AND TAKE A NAP.

  UP AND DINNER WITH WHEELS. SHE MADE A VERY GOOD EGGPLANT PARM.

  6PM I HEAD TO THE NAIL ON MY MOTORCYCLE. I GET ALOT DONE BUT BY 10PM I WAS OUT OF STEAM. THE LAST 3 DAYS HAVE CAUGHT UP TO ME.

  PHILLIES WIN A HUGE GAME AND THE NEW CATCHER MAKES AN IMMEDIATE IMPACT.

  A NEIGHBOR THREW OUT 200 TENNIS BALLS. I TOOK HALF.

  A DESERVED NIGHTCAP OF SAM ADAMS 76 AND 2 SHOTS OF BRANDY. WELL , I HATE USING THE WORD " DESERVED " BUT I WILL USE IT.

  2 MORE DREAMS FORGOTTEN.......DAMN IT.

  THURSDAY        8 - 16 - 18

  LONG TIME NO SEE.............UNTIL TONIGHT.

  DO THE BOOKS AND THAN MAKE A RUN TO THE BANK ON MY MOTORCYCLE. 

  GRASS / LAWN / WEEDS ARE GROWING SO FAST WITH SO MUCH RAIN.  TODAY I DID A FULL GROOMING OF OUR PROPERTY AND I HAD THE HELP OF MY YOUNGEST......AWESOME.

  USING THE RIDING MOWER I CUT THE MAIN LAWN AND RUN OVER 50 KILLER CICADA WASP NESTS. I ONLY SAW ONE WASP.

  USING A SELF PROPELLED LAWN MOWER I CUT THE PLACES THE RIDING MOWER COULD NOT GET TOO. I ABSOLUTELY LOVE THIS LAWN MOWER. SELF PROPELLED RULES AND GETTING IT FREE ON CRAIGSLIST MAKES IT EVEN BETTER.

  NEXT I USE MY NEW CORDLESS WEED WHACKER. THE THING IS FRICKIN' AWESOME. I TRY TO MODIFY IT BECAUSE THIS IS SOMETHING I ALWAYS WANTED TO DO. REPLACE THE PLASTIC NYLON WITH METAL ROPE. I ATTEMPTED AND IT DID NOT WORK. I WAS THINKING I WOULD NEVER HAVE TO ADJUST THE SPOOL IF I HAD METAL STRING SPINNING. IT WOULD BE THE TERMINATOR OF WEED WHACKERS. WELL , IT DID NOT WORK AS I SAID. NEXT I TRIED COAXIAL CABLE LINE. AGAIN , IT DID NOT WORK VERY LONG. I WENT BACK TO THE ORIGINAL NYLON SPOOL STRING AND IT WORKED VERY WELL.

  YOUNGEST LEAF BLOWS THE ENTIRE PROPERTY AND SOME MORE AREAS OFF PROPERTY.

  I MOVE THE RABBIT'S HUTCH TO A NEW AREA AND REPLACE THE BEDDING AND CLEAN THE FLOORBOARD IT LAYS ON. I ALSO ROLL MY MOTORCYCLE BACK INTO THE GARAGE. I LEAF BLOW THE RIDING MOWER AND MY YOUNGEST FEEDS THE RABBIT. I ALSO EMPTY THE CATCH BAG ON THE LAWN MOWER.  OUR PROPERTY IS DONE AND I MUST SAY IT IS ONE OF THE BETTER LAWN CUTS I HAVE DONE.

  MY YOUNGEST AND I HEAD TO THE SWIM CLUB. I WAS SWEATY AND COVERED IN GRASS CUTTINGS. I WAS ALSO CURIOUS TO SEE THE MAJOR DAMAGE THE RAINS CAUSED AT OUR CLUB. WE RECEIVED 2 EMAILS SAYING THE POOLS WERE OVER FLOWED , PARKING LOT WIPED OUT WITH MUD , AND A SHED MOVED 75 FEET BY THE MASSIVE WATER.  WE GET THERE AND EVERYTHING WAS THE SAME. THEY EITHER DID A PHENOMENAL JOB CLEANING UP AND MOVING A 2,000 POUND SHED BACK TO ITS ORIGINAL SPOT OR SOMEONE BLEW THIS VERY OUT OF PROPORTION. ANYWAY , THE WATER WAS GLORIOUS AND HANGING WITH MY YOUNGEST WAS AWESOME. WE TALKED FOR ABOUT AN HOUR IN THE POOL. I LOVED EVERY SECOND AND DID NOT WANT IT TO END.

  IT'S SMALL BUT IT MADE ME CHUCKLE. WHEELS AND I ARE ALWAYS THINKING THE SAME THING. WE SAY SOMETHING AND THE OTHER WOULD SAY I WAS JUST THINKING THAT. WELL , TODAY I DID IT 3 TIMES WITH MY YOUNGEST.....TOO CUTE.

  WHEELS HEADS TO NEW JERSEY FOR SWIMMING , WATER , BEACH , BOATING , AND THE OCEAN...........AND FORGETS HER BATHING SUIT.  NO HUSBANDS OR KIDS ARE ALLOWED ON THIS MINI VACATION IN THIS GIGANTIC HOME ON THE BAY......JUST A GIRLS WEEKEND.  MUST BE NICE. 

  KIDS AND I ARE INVITED TO NEW JERSEY BUT AS OF RIGHT NOW WE ARE 50/50 IN GOING. ONE PROBLEM WOULD BE WHO COULD KEEP AN EYE OUT ON THE RABBIT AND BELOVED PUP.

  OFF TO THE NAIL ON THE BIKE TO CHILL. THE PHONE RINGS AND SOME ONE WANTS TO PARK IN THE BACK BECAUSE OF A LEG INJURY. THE GUY'S LEG WAS IN A ANKLE CAST. I WAS ON THE PHONE SO I WATCHED VIA THE SURVEILLANCE MONITOR AND LO AND BE HOLD IT WAS AN OLD FRIEND I HAVE NOT SEEN IN 5 YEARS. HE HOBBLES WITH HIS CRUTCHES ALL THE WAY BEHIND THE BAR AND HUGS ME. HE ALSO BEGINS TO CRY AND SAID , " I AM SO SORRY AND I MISS YOU. "  THIS APOLOGY MIGHT OF BEEN TAINTED A BIT SINCE THEY WERE DRINKING SINCE 2PM. IT IS NOW 10PM. IT WAS VERY GOOD TO SEE HIM AND WE CAUGHT UP ON KIDS , WORK , AND RELATIONSHIPS.

  MAKE SOME JALAPEÑO POPPERS FOR MY YOUNGEST AND BRING THEM HOME. I MAKE A LIME GIN AND SODA WATER AND HAVE SOME ALMONDS AND SHARP CHEESE.....OH MY GOD....SO GOOD !!

  BLOW.

 SPEAKING OF BLOW. THE PHILLIES LOST 24 - 4 IN THE FIRST GAME OF A DOUBLE HEADER AGAINST THE METS. WORST LOSS EVER. THE ONLY COOL THING WAS MY COUSIN'S GRANDMOTHER WAS HONORED AT THE GAME.  THIS WONDERFUL 103 YEAR OLD WOMAN GOT THE FULL TREATMENT ON AND OFF THE FIELD. THERE ARE SOME FACEBOOK PICTURES MY COUSIN POSTED AND THEY VERY COOL TO SEE.

 PHILLIES BOUNCE BACK AND WIN GAME 2. OF COURSE THEY HAD TO HANG ON TO WIN THE GAME.

  EAGLES.....WHAT THE FUCK ?  EVERY PLAYOFF TEAM FROM LAST YEAR HAS WON THEIR FIRST 2 GAMES OF PRESEASON......EXCEPT US. I KNOW....I KNOW......PRESEASON DOESN'T MEAN DICK. BUT JESUS WE LOOK ABSOLUTELY PATHETIC WITH TURNOVERS , DROPPED PASSES , PENALTIES ........WHY THE FUCK ISN'T IT THE OTHER TEAMS THAT MESS UP AND WE LOOK AWESOME ???.....LIKE A SUPERBOWL CHAMPION SHOULD LOOK LIKE.

  I KNOW IT IS PRESEASON BUT LOOK AT THIS.----- OUR FIRST DRIVE WITH FOLES AS QUARTERBACK AND WE GO 3 AND OUT. THE PATRIOTS FIRST DRIVE WITH BRADY THEY SCORE A TOUCH DOWN. I KNOW I KNOW ......IT IS ONLY PRESEASON BUT C'MON MAN.

  BACK HOME I CHILL WITH MY YOUNGEST AND PUP. I WATCH A LITTLE TV , HAVE A NIGHTCAP , AND HEAD TO BED. I WOKE UP SEVERAL TIMES DURING THE NIGHT. I FORCED MYSELF TO STAY IN BED AND TRY TO FALL ASLEEP AGAIN........WHICH I DID.

  OH , AS I ENTER MY BEDROOM THERE WAS A BLACK DOG LAYING ON MY PILLOW. I HUGGED AND SNUGGLED WITH THE PUP FOR ABOUT 10 MINUTES AND THAN SAID , " GET THE HELL OFF MY BED. " I CONVINCED THE PUP TO GO INTO MY YOUNGEST BEDROOM.

   FRIDAY     8 - 17 - 18

  ALWAYS FUN WORKING WITH THE COLLEGE KIDS.....EVEN MORE FUN WHEN THERE IS A BIG CROWD.

  START THE DAY WITH A LITTLE PROJECT UPSTAIRS IN MY OLD OFFICE AREA. WE ACQUIRED A WORKOUT MACHINE AND INSTALLED IT IN THE MAIN OFFICE AREA. NOW , THE NEXT STEP IS GETTING A TV TO WATCH WHILE WORKING OUT.  I CARRIED A TV UP FROM THE BASEMENT AND RAN A SPLITTER TO THE MAIN CABLE FEED COMING IN.  THERE IS A MINOR GLITCH BUT NOT TOO BAD. I CONNECTED IT VIA MY ELDEST BEDROOM. SINCE THE KID IS GOING TO COLLEGE AND NOT USING THE ROOM VERY MUCH I MOVED THE CABLE BOX TO THE OFFICE AREA NEAR THE STAIR MASTER. BASICALLY , ONE CABLE BOX DOES 2 TV'S SIMULTANEOUSLY. I THINK THE SET-UP CAME OUT NICE UNTIL I NOTICED SOMETHING...........THE TV HAS NO POWER BUTTON OR REMOTE. SO , HOW THE HECK DO YOU TURN THE TV ON AND OFF ?

  NEXT PROJECT WAS TO FIND A UNIVERSAL TV REMOTE. I HAVE ABOUT 30 REMOTES IN MY BASEMENT. I FIND ONE AND CLEAN IT UP. I GOOGLE THE TV CODES AND WITHIN MINUTES I HAVE THE CODE AND THE TV TURNS OFF. BUT, I CAN NOT TURN THE TV BACK ON. I GOOGLE AGAIN TO TRY TO TURN A TV ON FROM THE OFF POSITION.......MUCH HARDER. I WAS ABOUT TO GIVE UP AFTER 30 MINUTES BUT I GOT IT TO WORK.

  I ALSO PRINT UP MORE VISA SLIPS FOR THE NAIL.

  I ORDER ANOTHER SUNOCO GAS CARD FOR MY ELDEST AND ALSO HAD A FLEET 66 CARD CHARGE CREDITED FOR UNSUBSTANTIATED CHARGES.  IT WAS $48.

  DOWNSTAIRS I TRY TO CHILL SINCE I HAVE A LONG NIGHT. I DECIDE TO WATCH " KINGSMEN - THE GOLDEN CIRCLE ". THIS SEQUEL TO " KINGSMEN " WAS MUCH WORSE THAN THE ORIGINAL MOVIE. BUT , I GOT MY YOUNGEST TO SNUGGLE WITH ME ON THE COUCH AND WE WATCHED IT TOGETHER. TO ME......THIS WAS THE BIG PICTURE.

  I MAKE LUNCH FOR MY YOUNGEST WHO WAS WORKING ON AN ART PROJECT AND READING FOR OVER 4 HOURS TODAY.

  OFF TO THE NAIL ON MY MOTORCYCLE. I ALMOST REGRETTED IT BECAUSE THEY WERE CALLING FOR THUNDER STORMS. I COVERED MY BIKE WITH A POOL TARP FOR MOST OF THE NIGHT.

  I DID STOP AT A FRIEND'S HOUSE TO DROP OFF CLOTHES AND A BATHING SUITE FOR WHEELS. THESE FRIENDS WILL BE JOINING HER LATER TONIGHT.

  THERE ARE 2 TEXTS TO BARTENDERS I SEND. ONE IS GOOD AND THE OTHER ....NOT SO GOOD.

  GOOD - " COME IN NOW. "

  BAD - " 8PM " ( IF A BARTENDER IS SUPPOSE TO BE IN AT 7PM AND SEE THIS TEXT....NOT GOOD )

  THE NIGHT STARTED FAST RIGHT FROM THE START. I ABSOLUTELY LOVE WORKING WITH MY ELDEST , YOUNGEST , AND " M " THE COLLEGE KID FRIEND ( SHE CRACK ME UP AND IS ADORABLE....ALL OF THEM ARE )

  GREAT MUSIC FROM THE FIRST BAND WHICH HAD FIDDLES , BANJOS , UKULELES , CLARINET , AND MORE.  THEY WERE A SOUTHERN BLUE GRASS BAND CALLED " DAISY ROYCE ".....LOTS OF FUN AND SUPER POLITE.

  NEXT A SOLO ARTIST NAME DAN MALLOY WHO PLAYED AN INTRICATE GUITAR AND NO VOCALS. OUR DOORMAN / BARTENDER , WHO IS IN A BAND , WAS SUPER IMPRESSED.

  LAST BAND WAS " RASAN IN THE HEYDAY ". WE SPELLED HIS NAME WRONG MULTIPLE TIMES BUT MAN CAN HIS BAND PLAY. I DID NOT KNOW HE WAS FRIENDS WITH SOME OF THE REGULARS HERE.

  MY YOUNGEST COOKED FOOD ALL NIGHT WHILE THE 2 COLLEGE GIRLS BARTENDED. I LOVED EVERY SECOND OF THIS NIGHT.....GOOD CROWD , GREAT WORKERS , EXCELLENT MUSIC , AND THE RAIN HELD OFF.

  AFTER THE LAST BAND ALL 4 OF US HELPED CLEAN UP AND PUT AWAY THE HOUSE DRUM KIT.  THERE WAS STILL A NICE CROWD BUT I HAD TO ROLL BECAUSE I WAS AFRAID OF THUNDER STORMS COMING IN. MY YOUNGEST RIDES WITH ME AND WE ARRIVE HOME WITH NO RAIN. WE BRING THE RABBIT INSIDE.

  ANOTHER HOUR LATER MY ELDEST AND HER FRIEND " M " STOP AT THE HOUSE. AGAIN , " M " JUST ENTERTAINS ME TO NO END.

  PHILLIES WITH A BIG WIN AND MOVE A 1/2 GAME OUT OF FIRST PLACE SINCE THE BRAVES LOST.  IT IS GOOD TO SEE THEM BOUNCE BACK AFTER THE 20 RUN DRUDGING.

   A NIGHTCAP , SOME ALMONDS , AND A LITTLE TV BUT I WAS HEADING TO BED REAL SOON.

  ONE OF WHEELS BEST FRIENDS NAMED " C " COMES TO OUR HOUSE DRIVING IN A SMALL TRUCK. SHE TELLS WHEELS AND I SHE HAS STUFF TO DROP OFF AT D.M.I. HOME SUPPLY ACROSS THE STREET FROM THE NAIL. WE DRIVE THERE TOGETHER AND I KEEP ASKING HER WHAT SHE HAS TO SELL. " C " NEVER GIVES A STRAIGHT ANSWER. WE ARRIVE AT D.M.I. HOME SUPPLY AND " T " THE OWNER WALKS OUT TO GREET US. HE IS CURIOUS TOO. WE OPEN THE BACK OF THE TRUCK AND IT IS OLD FURNITURE AND CLOTHING THAT LOOKED LIKE IT WAS SITTING IN A GARAGE FOR DECADES. THERE WAS ALSO CANNED FOOD AND LEFTOVER MEALS THAT ALSO LOOKED AGED. " T " SAYS TO " C " , " I AM SORRY BUT I HAVE NO USE FOR THIS STUFF. " I LOOK AT WHEELS AND THAN LOOK AT " C " AND SAY , " YO KID , WHAT IS THIS ? "  OUR FRIEND RESPONDS , " I HAVE NO IDEA. I JUST WANTED IT OUT OF MY GARAGE. " WE CLOSE THE TRUCK AND BEGIN DRIVING BACK TO OUR HOUSE.............dream ends.

  MY YOUNGEST AND I WITH 4 OF HER FRIENDS GO TO A SIDE JOB OF MINE. WE ARRIVE AT THIS HUGE MANSION OWNED BY A MILLIONAIRE INDIAN PERSON. WE ARE GREETED BY HIM AND HE IS VERY POLITE.  HE TELLS US , " I DO NOT HAVE A JOB FOR YOU TODAY BUT I DO HAVE AN ADVENTURE. WE ARE GOING TO DO A SCAVENGER HUNT AND WHATEVER YOU FIND YOU GET TO KEEP !! " WE ALL LOOK AT EACH OTHER WITH A LITTLE GLEE AND EXCITEMENT. HE TELLS US THE FIRST CLUE AND WE FIGURE IT OUT QUITE QUICKLY..........THE SEARCH IS UNDER BEDS.  MY YOUNGEST AND I ARE A TEAM AND WE ENTER THE MASTER BEDROOM. I SEE STUFF UNDER THE HUGE BED AND ASK HER TO CRAWL UNDER. SHE DOES AND BEGINS PUSHING OUT EXPENSIVE CLOTHES , JEWELRY , AND BOXES.  AFTER ABOUT 5 MINUTES SHE CRAWLS BACK OUT AND WE BEGIN TO ROOT THROUGH ALL THE STUFF. SOME REALLY COOL ITEMS AND THE INDIAN OWNER ENTERS THE ROOM AND SAYS , " I SEE YOU FOUND THE FIRST TREASURE. YOU MAY KEEP IT ALL ". MY YOUNGEST AND I LOOK AT EACH OTHER WITH DISBELIEF AND OUR EYES WIDEN AS WE OPEN UP A BOX WITH GOLD COINS THAT SHINE REALLY BRIGHT...........dream ends.

   SATURDAY         8 - 18 -18

  " BEAR.....BIG BEAR.......BIG BEAR CHASE".  THIS CAN ME HEARD ON A VIDEO SENT TO US FROM A MOUNTAIN HOUSE RENTER. LUCKILY THE VIDEOER WAS QUOTING THE JOHN CANDY MOVIE " THE GREAT OUTDOORS " AND NO ONE WAS HURT. THESE LUCKY RENTERS GOT TO SEE A MOMMA BEAR AND 2 CUBS RUN RIGHT ACROSS OUR BACK YARD JUST YARDS FROM OUR MAIN DECK. THAT......IS PRETTY DAMN COOL.

  MOVING THE RABBIT.......POOR THING MOVES FROM OUR GARDEN TO THE HUTCH TO INSIDE A BEDROOM BECAUSE OF ONE THING.........RAIN.

  TO THE KIDS - COME WITH ME AND WE GO OUT TO DINNER BUT HEY HAD TO HELP AT THE BAR.  HERE IS HOW IT WENT :

  - FIRST WE HEAD TO THE NAIL AND DO A FULL CLEAN. IT IS SO MUCH EASIER WITH 2 PEOPLE HELPING ME.

  - AT 6:30PM WE HEAD TO THE IRON HILL BREWERY. A 35 TO 40 MINUTE WAIT IN A PLACE THAT HOLDS 400....UN-FUCKING-BELIEVABLE.  I THINK OF THE NAIL AND I BE FLIPPING OVERJOYED IF 20 PEOPLE WERE THERE.

  - WE DRIVE UP LANCASTER AVENUE AND ALL OF US THINK OF RESTAURANTS.  WE DECIDE ON " THE GOAT'S BEARD ".  A FRIEND WORKS THERE. OF COURSE HE IS NOT WORKING.  I TEXT HIM HIS SUGGESTIONS AND HE TEXTS BACK 2 HOURS LATER AFTER WE LEFT. THERE IS A 20 MINUTE WAIT HERE OR EAT OUTSIDE ON THE PATIO. WE DECIDE TO GO OUTSIDE WHERE IT IS ACTUALLY KINDA NICE.  I ASKED TO SIT OUTSIDE AND BE PUT ON THE WAITING LIST TO BE INSIDE. WE COULD DO APPETIZERS OUTSIDE AND ENTREES INSIDE..........THEY NEVER CALLED US TO MOVE. ANYWAY , THE FOOD WAS SPICY TO OKAY TO GOOD. SOME WAS REALLY GOOD AND UP MY ALLEY AND OTHERS WERE NOT SO GOOD. THE MUSSELS AND GARLIC BREAD ( NOT ENOUGH ) WERE VERY GOOD BUT THE BROTH AND HAMBURGER MEAT WITH MINT IN THE BROTH WAS NOT SO GOOD.  THE STEAK MAC & CHEESE WAS VERY GOOD BUT THE PORTION WAS EXTREMELY SMALL AND $24. IT WOULD BE ON THE KID'S MENU AT ANY OTHER EATERY. THE HUMMUS AND PITA WAS VERY GOOD BUT NOT ENOUGH PITA BREAD WAS SERVED FOR EVEN EATING HALF THE HUMMUS. I ASKED FOR MORE PITA AND WE WERE STILL SHORT. THE SPECIALS WERE FISH TACOS IN WHICH THEY WERE OUT OF. WHY TELL US THE SPECIALS THAN ? SO WE HAD PORK TACOS....THEY WERE GOOD. I ORDERED A GOATS' BEER CALLED " CHUGGIT " WHICH WAS VERY GOOD.........$7.50 A PINT ( THE NAIL VICTORY GOLDEN MONKEY $4.25 ).  I ENJOYED THIS RESTAURANT AND RESPECT THE CHEF FOR HIS CREATIVITY OF FLAVOR. SOME REALLY HIT AND OTHERS DID NOT.....JUST OUR OPINION.

  WHILE AT DINNER I TELL THE KIDS OF SOME OF MY ADVENTURES WHEN I WAS YOUNG. THEY RANGES FROM PARTIES TO POLICE TO CONCERTS TO DODGING MY PARENTS AND SNEAKING OUT AT NIGHT. HOPE I DIDN'T GIVE THEM ANY IDEAS.

  ONE THING I SOOOOOO DID NOT LIKE. I ALMOST SAID SOMETHING BUT DIDN'T. A FATHER AND MOTHER WITH A SON AND DAUGHTER ARE SITTING OUTSIDE AT A TABLE NEXT TO US. THE FATHER GIVES HIS SON ABOUT A 4 OUNCE SAMPLE OF HIS BEER. THE KID WAS ABOUT 12 YEARS OLD AND 70 POUNDS OVER WEIGHT. GEE......I WONDER WHERE THIS WILL LEAD FOR THIS YOUNG BOY.

  - WE WALK TO " MAIN LINE PIZZA " TO VISIT MY FAVORITE FRIEND AND BARTENDER AT THE NAIL OF OUR ELDEST. SHE IS WORKING THE REGISTER AND I HEAR FROM MY KIDS , " NOW DAD....PLEASE DO NOT BE A NUDGE. "  THE OWNER ASKS ME IF I NEED HELP. I RESPOND , " I LIKE TO HEAR THIS YOUNG WOMAN'S OPINION ON THE PIZZA HERE. ". MY KIDS SHUTTER WITH EMBARRASSMENT AND GIGGLE AS I ASK OUR YOUNG FRIEND , " SO I LIKE TO ORDER ONE SLICE OF PIZZA AND HAVE IT CUT 3 WAYS FOR US TO SHARE. EACH SLICE NEEDS TO HAVE 5 PIECES OF PEPPERONI ON IT PLEASE.  " M " GIGGLES AND TELLS HER BOSS , " THESE ARE MY FRIENDS ".  I THINK I HEARD HIM WHISPER , " TELL THE FAT GUY TO LEAVE BUT THE 2 GIRLS CAN STAY. " OF COURSE I PLAYED WITH HER A LITTLE MORE AND WE HEADED OUT.

  - NEXT WE WALK TO " FIVE BELOW " WHERE EVERYTHING IS FIVE DOLLARS OR LESS.  I WALK INTO THE FIRST SET OF DOORS AND FROM BEHIND THE GLASS I YELL , " E _ _ _ _ !!!!!! " (THIS IS THE SISTER OF " M " AT THE PIZZA SHOW AND BEST FRIEND OF MY YOUNGEST ).  MY KIDS LEAVE THE STORE AND I CONTINUE TO YELL FROM BEHIND THE GLASS LIKE DUSTIN HOFFMAN IN THE MOVIE " THE GRADUATE ". I DO NOT THINK THE KIDS , " E " , OR THE CUSTOMERS KNEW THIS MOVIE.

  MORE THINGS AT " FIVE BELOW " :

  - I TELL THE KIDS THEY CAN BUY ONE THING. MY YOUNGEST GETS 2.

  - STANDING IN FRONT OF A LARGE DISPLAY OF SCHOOL BACK PACKS I YELL TO THE REGISTER GIRL ABOUT 15 AISLES AWAY ......" EXCUSE ME MAIM. CAN YOU TELL ME WHERE THE BACK PACKS ARE ??!! "

  - FROM 2 AISLES AWAY , I THROW A SQUEEGEE BEANIE BALL AT MY YOUNGEST AND THAN HIDE. THE KID CALLS ME A NUDGE.

  - I GET A GIGANTIC TENNIS BALL THE SIZE OF A BEACH BALL AND ROLL IT DOWN AN AISLE ABOUT 75 FEET HITTING MY ELDEST AT HER ANKLES. I HEAR , " OH MY GOD , WE CAN'T TAKE YOU ANYWHERE. "

  - I ASK THE REGISTER GIRL SOME OF THE STUPIDEST QUESTIONS LIKE , " WHO FILLS THE AIR IN THESE TENNIS BALLS ? CAN YOU GET ME THE NUMBER I LIKE TO THANK THEM. "

  - WE ARE TOLD IT IS CLOSING TIME SO WE CHECK OUT. I BUY THE PRODUCTS MY KIDS WANTED AND HAVE $4 CHANGE.  I ASK THE REGISTER GIRL ( MY KID'S FRIEND ) , " THOSE HULA HOOPS BEHIND YOU. IF YOU CAN HULA HOOP 5 TIMES I WILL GIVE YOU THIS $4. " OF COURSE THE KIDS SAYS NO AND IS TOO SHY IN FRONT OF EVERYONE. I TURN TO THE ADORABLE MANAGER. SHE IS A CUTE AFRICAN AMERICAN GIRL WHO IS GIGGLING AT ALL MY NONSENSE AND ANTICS. I SAY TO HER , " SAME DEAL FOR YOU ?  5 TIMES AND THE CASH IS YOURS. " I WAVE THE MONEY AND TO MY SURPRISE SHE GRABS A HULA HOOP AND EASILY HIPS OUT 5 TIMES WITH THE HULA. EVERYONE CHEERS AND I GIVE HER THE MONEY........WE ALL LAUGH.

  - " M " , THE SISTER WE JUST VISITED AT THE PIZZA SHOP COMES IN. SHE SEES WHAT I AM DOING AND LAUGHS.

  " M " DRIVES US BACK TO WHERE WE PARKED. I TREAT EVERYONE TO ICE CREAM ( I HAD NONE ). WE GO DOWN THESE STEPS TO A CUTE LITTLE ICE CREAM PARLOR CALLED " THE WAYNE ICE CREAM BAR " OR LOCALLY CALLED " THE BAR ".  TWO ADORABLE GIRLS ARE WORKING AND OF COURSE I PLAY WITH THEM. ALL THE GIRLS HAVE ICE CREAM WHILE I JUST SIT AND ASK THEM QUESTIONS.........I LOVED EVERY SECOND IT.

  MY ELDEST DRIVES WITH HER FRIEND AND WHILE MY YOUNGEST AND I HEAD HOME. WE ALL ARRIVE AND ARE WELCOMED BY "CRAZY DOG NELLIE ". THE DOG IS WAGGING HER TAIL AND SHAKING HER HEAD. THIS CAN BE SEEN FROM THE PATIO FOR SHE IS IN THE WINDOW STANDING ON OUR COUCH. WE GET CLOSER AND THERE IS THE WHITE TEETH SMILING AT US. I WAIT AT THE DOOR AND DO NOT OPEN IT WITH MY KEYS. I BEGIN TO MIMIC THE PUP AND THE DOG IS HOWLING BACK FROM THE INSIDE. FINALLY MY YOUNGEST  SAYS , " OH C'MON , LET HER OUT. "  I OPEN THE DOOR AND THE PUP EXPLODES OUTSIDE WITH GLEE.......TOO FUNNY.

  MY YOUNGEST GOES TO HER ROOM TO WORK ON HER ART PROJECTS AND READ. I WILL POST A PICTURE ON FACEBOOK FOR FAMILY TO SEE. THE KID PAINTED A COY POND WITH GREEN BRUSH AROUND THE WATER. SHE VISITED THIS GARDEN IN OUR AREA A MONTH AGO........PRETTY DAMN IMPRESSIVE. ANYWAY , SHE ALREADY PUT IN 4 HOURS EARLIER. MY ELDEST HEADS OUT WITH HER FRIEND INTO THE NIGHT.

  I WATCH TV AND LOOK FOR A MOVIE. I CHOOSE A NETFLIX MOVIE CALLED " OCEANS RISING ". ONE OF THE WORST MOVIES I EVER SEEN. SPECIAL EFFECTS WERE HORRIBLE AND SCENES WERE SHOT SO CLOSE THAT YOU NEVER KNOW THE EARTH HAD RISING OCEANS. MUCH OF IT WAS INSINUATED. LIKE............OH MY GOD !!! THE OCEAN IS HIGHER THAN THE EMPIRE STATE BUILDING !!! THAN THEY SHOW A MODULAR REPLICATE OF THE BUILDING IN A BABY POOL SHOT 4 INCHES FROM IT. I ACTUALLY LAUGHED OUT LOUD. THE  WHOLE MOVIE COULD OF BEEN SHOT IN A BASEMENT..........IN A CARD BOARD BOX.......NEXT TO THE WASHER & DRYER......WITH A FLASH LIGHT.

  NO BOOZE FOR NIGHTCAPS AND I HEAD TO BED WHERE THERE IS A PUP SLEEPING ON MY PILLOW. MY YOUNGEST AND I SNUGGLE WITH HER FOR ABOUT 10 MINUTES. MY YOUNGEST TAKE S THE PUP TO HER ROOM.

  PHILLIES LOSE......BLOW.

  A NEW GAME CALLED " GRANDMA CATCHES A BALL ". JUST ONE REALLY WEIRD SPIN ON THIS GAME. THE WOMEN HAVE TO BE OVER 70 YEARS OLD. THEY WALK UP A SMALL HILL OF SNOW AND A BALL IS THROWN AT THEM. IF THEY CATCH IT THEY MUST JUMP OFF THE HILL AND LAND SAFELY IN SNOW WITHOUT TOUCHING THE GROUND. EACH CONTESTANT THAT SUCCESSFULLY DOES THIS THE HILL IS RAISED BY 1 FOOT. THE CONTESTANTS KEEP WINNING AND OLD LADIES ARE FALLING ALL OVER THE PLACE. IT WAS LIKE A BAD COMMERCIAL OF " HELP , I'VE FALLEN AND I CAN'T GET UP !! "   THE FINAL WINNER IS 15 FEET IN THE AIR AND LANDS PERFECTLY. I GUESSED ALL THE OTHER LADIES WERE HEADING TO THE HOSPITAL. JESUS......GRAND MOM FELL HARD ON THE LAST JUMP. WHAT A F'N GAME SHOW.....................dream ends.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

  

 

 

 

 

 

 

  

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

  

 

    

  

  

 

  

  

 

  

 

  

 

 

   

  

 

    

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

   

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 



 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

   

 

 

 

 

  

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

  

  

 

 

 

  

  

 

  

  

  

 

  

 

 

 

  

 

  

  

  

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

  

 

  

   

 

    

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

  

 

 

  

  

 

  

   

   

 

 

   

 

 

    

  

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

   

   

 

 

 

 

 

  

   
 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

  

   

   

  

     

 

    

    

 

    

 

 

 

 

 

  

 

 

..

All content © Copyright 2001 WHEELS INC.